I Died So I Could Haunt You
by S8105
Summary: 13 years with the CIA had trained Ashley for everything, well almost everything. Spashley.
1. A Blind Date of Sorts

Chapter 1

It was one of Ashley's rare days off. But in this particular city she was not Ashley, she was Sam, here for a business meeting regarding new computer software. Ashley always chose computer software meeting as her cover because it was the rare person who actually asked her to delve into her line of work and the meeting she planned to attend. Ashley, or Sam, was casually sipping on a coffee and reading the morning paper despite it being late into the afternoon. Ashley had noted the two men obviously on a lunch break quietly chatting in the back, she also noted the 19-year old girl furiously typing away on her computer and the single security camera pointed at the door, but was actually not recording a thing. Ashley let out a sigh, noticing everyone and everything in a room was another side effect of her job, despite her day off. What was even more rare than a day off was Ashley actually able to take a step away from her job and enjoy the sunshine outside.

It had been a long 13 years since the CIA picked her up at the ripe age of 15. She was technically an orphan at that point and decided that training with the recruiter that approached her was a better option than being sent to a home. After being in the service so long, it was hard to even think about turning off her training, let alone knowing how to enjoy time away from the job. She was here on a routine job, steal some papers that could lead to weapon smuggling into the US. But she wouldn't think about her assignment today; today was her day off.

As Ashley flipped back towards the comic strips of her paper (a secret guilty pleasure she had) a disheveled blonde was huffing above her table with a look of panic in her eyes. Before Ashley could react, could even comprehend why this woman was standing in front of her, the blonde opened her mouth and words fell out that seemed even more disheveled than the blonde.

"You must be Ashley!" Ashley opened her mouth to object (because in this town she was Sam) while slowly reaching towards her bag where she kept her gun (despite her day off), but stopped when she heard the blonde rambled on. "I am sooo sorry I am late! Chelsea is going to kill me when she finds out that I was late for our blind date! I mean for god's sake she goes through all this trouble, and you agree to meet me and I'm half an hour late! You must hate me!"

Ashley instantly relaxed, obviously this girl is meeting someone because Ashley sure as hell did not know any Chelsea, and it is just a large coincidence that the girl happened to be named Ashley as well. Ashley took a moment to soak the blonde in. She was beautiful, without a doubt. Her long blonde hair framed her face perfectly despite looking like it hadn't seen a brush today. The rambling blonde was tall, slightly taller than Ashley herself. She was in her mid twenties and was dressed very casually. A ratty blue t-shirt that brought out her eyes, a loose pair of jeans, topped with a pair of old converse. She had a small tattoo inside her left hand wrist, and she seemed like a runner. Ashley was again about to interrupt this girl, but could not find a place to stop her from speaking. Ashley lifted an eyebrow and a small smirk formed on her face.

"And now do you not only hate me, you think I am crazy! Crazy old Spencer freaking out her blind date. But I have a semi-valid excuse as to why I was late. You see last night I woke up from the strangest dream and I just had to put it down on paper, and I kept writing and writing and when I looked at the clock I realized I was SO late to meet you. Well, okay, maybe it isn't a valid reason to be late, but sometimes I just get so wrapped up in it."

And finally Ashley had her opening to put the rambling blonde at ease. "You are a writer? What kind of writer?" Ashley was shocked. That was definitely not what she was planning to say. But there was something about the blonde, this Spencer, that amused Ashley. It couldn't hurt to talk to this girl for a minute; it was, after all, her day off.

"Well I take it you don't hate me then! Good!" And with that the blonde threw her bag down and plopped into the seat across from Ashley. To Ashley's surprise Spencer grabbed the paper out of her hand and flipped it to the front page. Spencer then threw it down in front of Ashley. In the right hand corner was an article that a Spencer Carlin had written and even taken photos for. It was a piece that centered on one of the local 4th graders saving an elderly lady from a burning house. Ashley looked up in surprise.

"I only write for the newspaper as a hobby. I am actually working on my third novel, but before you ask, none of them have been published. In fact, the first two have only been read by two people, and that is including myself. I am actually a doctor over at the local hospital. But writing, writing is what I do." At this point Spencer was looking down at the table with a small blush on her face; Ashley couldn't help but notice it was extremely cute.

"If you don't let anyone read your books why write them? Or why write for the paper when you are so nervous to show your work to people?" Ashley asked hoping these questions would bring Spencer's eyes back to meet hers.

"I don't write for anyone else, I write because my ideas, my stories, my characters don't leave my head until they are on paper, until I can breathe life into them. My writing is not so it can be acclaimed or even read by others, it is so I can feel peace because if I don't put it on paper, I never feel calm, only a constant nagging of wanting to leave my brain and finding a place on paper. And my newspaper job has never been a dream of mine. I mean who would dream to write for a paper this small, in a town this boring? I am among the few in this town that have gotten a degree in English, and I suppose the local newspaper thought I was a steal. Most people that work on the paper carry other jobs also. You should know this considering you live here and all Ashley."

Ashley winced at the reminder that this conversation is based on a misunderstanding, a misunderstanding that only Ashley knew about. What concerned Ashley more was the fact that she winced at this lie, or in this case, withholding of the truth. Ashley's job and life were based on her ability to lie, and to lie with ease, but there she sat, uneasy about the lie that was floating between her and Spencer. Ashley should tell Spencer her cover story and make Spencer leave. Ashley was on a job, despite having the day off, and this would only complicate things. The problem is what Spencer said was interesting. Ashley actually liked this laid back, disheveled blonde that spoke a mile a minute. She was intrigued to find someone that held such a passion for what she did. Spencer was simply working because she loved it. While Ashley enjoyed the romance, the action, the adrenaline of her job, it was far from the passion this girl was claiming to experience, it was the best option for Ashley at the time.

Sidestepping Spencer's reference to the Ashley she was suppose to meet, Ashley asked, "Well how long have you been writing for Spencer? I mean that kind of passion had to have started early. And if you don't mind me asking, how do writing and being a doctor have anything to do with one another?"

Spencer was shocked with Ashley's interest in her life, or at least what considered Spencer considered her life - her writing. She was skeptical when her well meaning friend Chelsea decided it was time for Spencer to have a love affair with someone that did not live in the stacks and stacks of books that littered Spencer's apartment.

Chelsea had described Ashley as a very serious businesswoman. Chelsea also described Ashley as the most grown-up person she had ever met, but she was absolutely gorgeous. On that count Chelsea was right. The woman sitting before her was breathtakingly beautiful; her dark curls surrounding her perfect face. And her body was amazing. Ashley was physically perfect, and it seems impossible that someone that beautiful was not single. So Spencer was glad that Chelsea was right about that, but seemed so wrong about everything else.

Spencer had expected a woman dressed in a power suit, too stressed to think or even pay attention to Spencer, and would look down upon her artsy work and lifestyle. She expected question after question about why she didn't devote the same passion to being a doctor. But this girl did not seem so adult and serious, and she seemed far more impressed with her writing than her job as a local doctor. No she wasn't what Spencer expected; after all, Ashley was wearing jeans and a hoodie, and Spencer was sure she was reading Garfield in the comic section, far from super serious adult type. It was also refreshing to find someone that actually took Spencer's passion seriously.

"Oddly enough I only started writing right before I left high school. Before that my life revolved around books. I suppose one leads to another. But books, my god, I am surprised I had any friends while growing up considering how much I read. I loved getting lost in other people's lives and romances, and excitement. I guess it is a consequence of growing up in this dull little town. I wanted to live a life full of adventure and passion and everything that those books held. But it wasn't until the end of high school that I started writing. I had this English teacher, and I would always argue with her over the endings of all the books she assigned. I did not care for a lot of them, I thought they should have ended this way, or developed this character more and so on. I would always fight and she would state, 'These are the classics! If you can do so much better than why don't you write them yourself?' So finally I took her advice. I rewrote the end of one of the novels and submitted it as my personal essays to college, along with sending that bitch a copy too. Surprisingly I got in to all the schools I applied to. After that all of my own ideas came to me, and I just couldn't stop. I guess I should be grateful to my teacher, but I just can't bring myself to like her on any level." Spencer laughed out the end of her story and Ashley, to her surprise, was laughing with her. It was a genuine laugh; it seemed like forever since that had happened.

Spencer continued, "At school I studied English and also Pre-Med. My mother was the local doctor here, and I loved the idea of helping people, and following in her footsteps. So I went through med school and took over my mother's position at the hospital. I may be young, but in a town like this, with references from my mother, it wasn't too hard to get a good position at the hospital. I guess I lucked out with that one."

Again both girls were chuckling again. Once their laughter died down they both looked at each other with a smile. Ashley was the first to break the eye contact and realized Spencer did not have anything to drink. Ashley waved over a waitress and turned back to Spencer, "So Spencer, what would you like to drink?"

The waitress looked at Spencer and quickly interrupted her, "Oh! You're Spencer! You are here to meet a date right? Well Ashley left her about 30 minutes before you got here and asked me to give you her card so you can reschedule. She said she was called into an emergency business meeting and she was sorry she could not stay! So what can I get you?"

Spencer looked at the waitress in shock. Wasn't this her date sitting across from her? She glanced down at the card the waitress handed her reading the name Ashley Stanford, then noticed Ashley's cup on the table, which was labeled Sam. Spencer looked up at her date and could read the slight panic and discomfort in the brunette's chocolate eyes. _Shit_. Spencer abruptly stood up.

The waitress mumbled out "I'll give you guys a minute" before rushing off. Ashley had never wanted to injure a civilian more than that stupid little waitress. Spencer was standing, looking mighty pissed and confused.

"What the hell kind of game do you think you are trying to play here? Why didn't you say anything? What is wrong with you?" The yelling blonde got the attention of both guys in the back and the 19-year old girl. Ashley knew she should just let her storm out, should just let it go at this. She was compromising everything, but this had been the best day off in a while. It was the first time she felt relaxed in years.

"Spencer I am so sorry! Let me ex-"

"Don't use my name! I don't even know who you are! Sam, right? Go to hell Sam." And with that the blonde grabbed her bag and rushed out. Ashley was left standing alone at her table, with the three customers and the waitress all giving her strange looks. The brunette was at a loss for what to do; despite her training and despite her logical side encouraging her to let this go, she found herself collecting her things to go and find Spencer.


	2. Meeting Take Two

**Thank you so much to everyone that commented and add my to alerts and favorites! I was nervous because I am a first time writer, so it was really encouraging! I will try to update Wednesdays and Sundays. Thanks again, and enjoy.**

Chapter 2- Meeting Take Two

It wasn't hard to find Spencer once Ashley left the coffee shop. Even if she hadn't been working for the CIA, Ashley would have quickly been able to spot the fuming blonde making her way down the sidewalk. Ashley jogged to catch up with her, calling out her name when she got close enough.

Spencer suddenly stopped at hearing Ash- no, Sam's voice calling her name. She shouldn't stop, she should just continue trying to get as far away from the brunette, the beautiful brunette, as she could. But Spencer did stop, but was unwilling to turn around to face Ashley. _That ought to show her_ thought the blonde, knowing herself, how lame she sounded.

"Spencer I am so sorry. I was going to tell you that you had me mixed up." Ashley stated as she slowly made her way in front of the blonde. Spencer was staring down at her battered white converse shoes when Ashley ducked down in her eye line so she could finish what she was saying. "But you see you were so disheveled and cute, and you were talking a mile a minute, and I couldn't get a word in. And then I heard you talk about writing and I just got caught up. Please forgive me."

Spencer stood there unmoving. _I'll let her stew in her apology for a little while_. The blonde noticed that Ashley was slightly fidgeting, and it occurred to Spencer the beautiful woman in front of her was nervous. And that melted the rest of Spencer's anger.

"Hi. My name is Spencer, I am supposed to meet my date here, but it seems like she bailed." And with that simple introduction and an offered hand, Spencer had forgiven Ashley, much to Ashley relief. And then another wave of anxiety hit Ashley because she didn't like that she was upset over Spencer. _This is so far from protocol_.

"Hi. My name is Sam, and I just so happen to like stealing other people's dates." Ashley felt a pang of regret at giving her cover name, but there was nothing else she could do. The important thing is she had made Spencer laugh, and that made Ashley feel good.

Ashley was still holding onto Spencer's hand when she asked, "Spencer, could I please buy you a coffee? I would love to get to know you."

"Actually, no you can't." Ashley was surprised how disappointed she was in Spencer's answer. But before she could excuse herself Spencer grabbed her arm.

"Wait, Sam, it's not like that! I would love to get coffee with you, but, see, I have to get to the hospital soon. My shift starts in half an hour. But I would love it if you could walk me, maybe?" It was Spencer's turn to fidget, but it didn't last long because she was met with a big smile from Ashley.

And with that Ashley and Spencer began their walk towards the hospital. Ashley was good about directing most of the conversation to Spencer. Although she did have to offer her cover story for being in town, and as expected Spencer did not seem too eager to delve into the world of computer programming.

Ashley gained a lot of information about Spencer through their conversation. She grew up in this small town, about an hour north of Los Angeles, with her dad (social worker), mother (doctor), and two brothers (Clay- the sweetheart and Glen- the ass). Her mother passed away 2 years ago, right as Spencer was planning to move back to town to take over her position at the hospital. Breast cancer had spread and there was nothing more to be done. The subject was quickly changed. As much as Spencer loved writing, she also had a passion and skill for medicine. She spent a lot of her youth running around the hospital with her mother, so it wasn't shocking when she came back to the small town with the proper credentials. She admitted to being extremely clumsy, but she was only clumsy because when she focused on something it was hard to see anything else. Her car needed to be repaired, and has needed to be repaired for the better part of a year and a half. She loved her little town, but she did miss the hustle and bustle of Los Angeles (she went to school at UCLA).

These were all the things that she learned through talking with Spencer, but she learned much more through her observations. Spencer spoke fast and the brunette found it entertaining trying to keep up with her. Spencer was completely unaware of her surrounding environment as they were walking. When she spoke of her family her eyes grew warm. When she was uncomfortable or speaking about her mother she would unknowingly touch the tattoo inside her wrist. Spencer was constantly fighting with her hair, never seeming to be able to keep it at bay. Ashley could tell there was a story behind her broken car, but didn't press for information. She could also tell that Spencer was being completely honest, the only lie being when she called Glen an ass. Ashley could tell because when Spencer lied she would scratch her face.

All this worried Ashley. Not the attention she paid to the blonde because that was simply a result of her job, but the interest that she had in everything she observed about the blonde. It also worried Ashley how cute she thought it was when Spencer blushed, or how sweet it was when Spencer would giggle at Ashley's lame little comments. Ashley should not care about this girl's life, nor should she be curious how long Spencer could speak without taking a breath. And what was overwhelmingly concerning was the urge Ashley had to grab the blonde's hand every time they brushed one another. But Ashley did not reveal any of these concerns to Spencer. She happily smiled along with Spencer, and asked question after question about her life.

As they neared the hospital, Spencer was really regretting that she had to work; she was enjoying her time with Sam. Spencer knew she was talking a lot, and she was insanely interested in the quiet brunette that was accompanying her, but every time she was going to ask Sam a question, she was quickly cut off by a question about her childhood, or her writing, or anything that had to do with her. So Spencer continued to answer all the questions, hoping that she would eventually get to ask the curly haired brunette all the same questions.

What blew Spencer away was how interested Sam was in every answer, every word that fell out of her fumbling mouth. Spencer never felt such attention being paid to her, and never by someone so polite and beautiful. Along the walk Sam had directed Spencer so she wouldn't step in a puddle, and even pushed some stray glass aside for Spencer to pass. Both actions were some of the cutest things Spencer had ever seen. She was shocked that Sam even noticed these things considering how engrossed she was in the conversation, but Spencer was very grateful considering she never noticed things like that.

Chelsea was going to die when she heard about this little adventure of Spencer's, especially when Spencer gushes about how great Sam turned out to be.

The two were now standing outside of the hospital, both reluctant to let the other one go. "Well, this is my stop. I will have to thank Chelsea for setting me up with someone who bailed."

Ashley smiled at this, "Well I guess I will have to thank her too. Or I could thank Ashley for missing out on a great conversation." This again led to a little staring contest between the two girls. Spencer realizing that she was getting closer and closer to being late, and Ashley realizing that she did not want Spencer to disappear into that building and out of her life.

Finally Spencer let out a little sigh, "Well Sam," Ashley winced, "Here is my card, please call me if you have any time before you head home. I would love to see you again." Ashley held the card, sad that she wouldn't get to use it.

Ashley mumbled out a "thank you" right before pulling the blonde into a hug. Ashley had shocked herself a lot throughout this entire encounter, but this was by far the strangest thing she did all afternoon.

Right as Ashley was about to let the blonde go, she noticed a man approaching them. _Oh shit. This can't be right, I am on a mission, why is he here? This is not going to end well_. Ashley could for see the slight drama that was about to unfold. She pulled away from Spencer and brushed one of the blonde locks behind Spencer's ear, while Spencer blushed furiously from the action.

_Well it was nice while it lasted_ Ashley thought as the tall brunette man finally reached them. Spencer finally noticed Ashley's gaze drifting and turned to take in a tall, handsome man wearing a suit and a frown staring directly at Sam.

"Ashley, we need to talk right now. Alone." The man stated, sending Spencer a harsh look. As Spencer eyed him up and down something dawned upon her, quickly turning to the brunette girl, Spencer was reeling.

"Ashley? Who the hell is Ashley? What game are you trying to play here _**Sam**_? So you really are a creep. God, how could I be so stupid?" And with that the blonde stormed off leaving an upset Ashley in her wake.

Ashley knew that she couldn't chase after Spencer this time. It is probably for the best that Spencer hates her now. This means there is no temptation to find her again. Ashley could forget her eventful day off and return back to her life. Despite knowing this, Ashley couldn't help but feel bitter towards Aiden, the man that ruined things with the rambling blonde.

"What the hell was that Davies? She sure had her panties in a twist," Aiden stated shooting Ashley a questioning look.

"Nothing asshole. Now what do you want? I am on a mission here, you could blow my cover."

"Headquarters sent me over. There has been a change in plans. We need to kidnap Geller tonight and take him in for interrogation. We found enough on him to bring him in for weapon smuggling. I will meet you at your room at 10 o'clock tonight." With that Aiden turned around and left Ashley to go get ready.

Ashley shot one look back to the hospital and with a sigh turned around to start the walk back to her hotel. _So much for my day off._


	3. The Set Up

Chapter 3: The Setup

Ashley was in her room. She was dressed for the night's activities: jeans, a brown leather jacket, her gun, her knives, her back up gun, and a pair of boots.

She kept going over the information she had on Geller; the CIA could not pinpoint anything to prove that he had actually begun to smuggle weapons into the country, but they knew he was involved or had information that the government needed.

After tailing him for the better part of a week, Ashley couldn't fathom what it was headquarters found that she had missed. Nevertheless, Aiden would be there shortly and Ashley needed to focus what was about to happen.

The biggest problem for Ashley was her inability to stop thinking about Spencer. Dr. Spencer Carlin. When Ashley finally reached her hotel room, she was so angry over how things had ended. She wanted Spencer to at least remember her fondly instead of being some freak that was merely playing games with her.

Ashley had stared at the card she received for a long time. There was nothing remarkable about the card other than the fact that it led to the blonde. Spencer Carlin. One of the numerous reasons the CIA had recruited her was because of her photographic memory, but in this instance it seemed like more of a curse than a blessing. Those seven digits that led to Spencer would forever be ingrained in her head, not to mention all the things that made Spencer so intriguing to Ashley.

But all these feelings and thoughts needed to be suppressed. If she lost focus while on her mission there was no telling what could happen to her.

Just as Ashley was beginning to get antsy there was a knock at the door. Ashley met Aiden in the hallway. "Where are we going to grab him?" Ashley asked, wanting more details about the mission before hand. "Well we found him at this local bar, he should be there for a little, so we can wait for him in the alley across the street and then go in for the grab."

They both headed off to the bar without speaking. Ashley felt uneasy about this. Nothing in her research or time spent here indicated that he ever went to this bar. She also hated the fact that she could not see into the bar to watch him. And Aiden seemed off.

They had been waiting in the alley for close to an hour in relative silence. Ashley had a constant nagging feeling and decided to act upon it.

"So what evidence did you guys find on Geller, from my end he seemed like a middleman, and there wasn't much to pin on him, especially not enough for us to have the right to take him in like this." Ashley watch as Aiden eyes widened before composing himself completely.

"I'm sorry Ashley, but I am not at liberty to tell you what we found or how we found it."

"Bullshit Aiden! This is my mission, I can't be involved with this without knowing what is happening."

Then Ashley felt it again, that nagging feeling. _This is all wrong. Geller wouldn't be caught in a dump like this. It's a Friday; tonight he gets his daughter, why would he be at a bar_?

In remembering this little detail Ashley started slowly moving away from Aiden and reached for her gun as Aiden did the same.

Ashley and Aiden both had their weapons drawn aiming at each other. They were slowly moving around each other, never losing eye contact for more than a second. "What the hell is going on here? Geller isn't in that bar. What's your angle Dennison?"

"Base sent me here to take care of you. You are out Ashley, but you have been involved in the CIA for far too long to just be let go. They wanted me to take care of you. It was orders, it came from higher up than I have even heard of."

Ashley's head was reeling. Out? They wanted her out? After 13 years they couldn't just drop her, death was the sentence that the CIA had given Ashley and she sure as hell wasn't going to take it lying down.

Ashley thought of all the problems this opened and before she could think too far in the future, she had to figure a way out of this mess. If she killed Aiden, they would just send another person and another person. There is no telling how long Aiden has been tracking Ashley.

And then one thought came crashing down around Ashley: _Spencer_. He had seen them together, who knows what they would do to her if they found out Ashley spent her last day with the blonde doctor/writer.

First thing was to take down Aiden without killing him, she needed more information and he was the only one that could give it to her. Aiden was, without a doubt, stronger but Ashley was a far better fighter and much quicker. The alley closed off behind Ashley while Aiden had an easy way to escape, she would have to limit his mobility.

"You don't have to do this Dennison, we have been through a lot together. I can't count how many times I have saved your life."

"You think this is easy for me Ashley? You think I want to do this?" And as Aiden continued his little speech Ashley saw her opportunity, she slowly reached towards the knives she had hidden by her lower back, all the while watching Aiden, Aiden's gun, and her own gun.

Before Aiden could even register Ashley's movement he felt the sharp sting in his hand which held his gun and as he turned to grab the gun a sharp stab to his left leg.

Ashley had thrown a knife in his right hand and left leg. He fell against the wall, in pain, but Ashley was quickly to run over and offer a roundhouse kick to his face. He instantly hit the ground. Ashley put a knee to his throat while stripping him of any weapons. Aiden looked up at Ashley dazed and confused. He was in obvious pain, but Ashley refused to let her guard down.

"Now, what the fuck is going on Dennison?" Ashley could see the conflict in his eyes.

"You know I can't say anything Ashley." With that comment Ashley reached down to the knife stuck in his leg and twisted it while Aiden yelled out in pain. Ashley felt slightly bad, but this thought quickly vanished when she felt Aiden huge fist reach up and hit her in the eye.

She fell off him, and he quickly staggered to his feet. Ashley was seeing stars and trying to regain her sense when she felt a swift kick to her stomach and Aiden throw her head against the brick wall. _Shit, I am going to die._

Aiden limped over towards Ashley while pulling out the knife in his hand. "I forgot how good you are with these. God damn that hurts. I am sorry that I am not a throwing knife expert like yourself and I have to resort to the old fashioned way of stabbing someone." And with that Aiden shakily bent down and pushed the small knife right into Ashley's side. It was a searing hot pain; it was the first time in all 13 years that she honestly didn't have a plan.

Aiden stepped back looking down at the bleeding girl. He would wait while she died, he couldn't stand to do anymore harm to her, but he had his orders, so he would wait.

"Damn it Ashley! It's not my fault. You have just seen too much. They want you out, not because you were disloyal, but because if you ever were disloyal you could destroy the country! If it hadn't of been me, it would have been someone else. I tried to fight for you, I know you are good and wouldn't turn, but it wasn't up to me or even any of the guys we work with, the order came from high up in the agency."

Ashley was struggling to get her bearings. The CIA wanted her dead as a safety precaution, despite having a perfect record. Her background must have made her seem like a loose cannon. She was admitted under unusual circumstances, but she would never betray the knowledge she had.

It isn't that she is so loyal to the nation and the CIA, but more she didn't care one way or the other. Giving away these secrets neither offered opportunity or punishment, but there was a large possibility that innocent people would die with leaked information, and Ashley didn't want that blood on her hands.

Aiden was still talking, still watching her bleed to death. She was lucky he never removed the knife. Had he removed it, she would be losing blood much more rapidly. Aiden would never learn, he always got lost in his own head during a mission; he always underestimated everyone around him. Because of this, Ashley knew that she had a chance to survive. With all her strength and adrenaline, she kicked her leg directly into Aiden's left kneecap, effectively breaking it. Aiden fell to the ground in a yell of pain.

Ashley slowly got herself off the ground and walked towards Aiden. He was clutching his knee, but she felt no mercy for him. She easily kicked him in the face and the stomach and anywhere. Over and over again, but finally her rage calmed and she began to think clearly. She couldn't kill him. She could use him. Ashley shakily knelt down towards the quivering Aiden, pushing him onto his back.

"Dennison, I need you to listen to me. I'm not going to kill you. I need you to go back to headquarters and say you completed your mission. Tell them I am dead and you burned my body. If you in anyway tell them I am alive, if you ever think of coming after me, starting an investigation on me, or even step foot inside this town again, I won't kill you, but I will go after your family.

I know everything about you. I trained you. I know about your 3 brothers in Florida, your parents in Colorado, your ex-girlfriend in New York, and I even know about you daughter and the mother of your child that also live in New York. I don't want to resort to killing any of them, but if I think you are trying to rat me out I will not hesitate to take care of them."

Aiden's eyes were wide with shock. No one knew these things, he never offered any of this information, and he never planned for anyone to know. "I like you Aiden, and I could easily kill you, but I need you to get these assholes off my back. I have no intention of revealing secrets, I don't even want revenge, I just want to live, and have a life as far away from this CIA bullshit as possible. So do we have a deal, or am I going to have to kill you?"

Aiden weighed his options; he couldn't risk his family's life. Even if Ashley killed him there was no guarantee they were safe if he refused Ashley's deal. He never wanted to kill Ashley, she was right in saying she had saved his life, more times than he could probably count.

So Aiden did the only thing he could think to do. "We have a deal. Please, just don't hurt my family." With that Ashley staggered to her feet.

She lost a lot of blood, she knew she was in trouble, but Aiden no longer posed a threat, she was more mobile than him at the moment anyways. Ashley slowly started her walk out of the alley, but she turned around with one final thought.

"And Aiden, if that girl I was with earlier today is ever bothered, mentioned, or even looked at by the CIA I will have no problem taking care of your entire family in front of your eyes. That is a promise that I will not forget." With that Ashley slowly hobbled out of the alley.


	4. Good Evening Freddy?

Chapter 4: Good Evening Freddy?

Spencer had been asleep for only an hour when she heard banging on her front door. After the bizarre day she had, she deserved to sleep for at least 12 hours, but her mind had been restless.

She couldn't stop thinking about Sam or Ashley or whoever the hell that brunette she spent the afternoon with was. She had had such a nice time, and the curly haired girl seemed relatively harmless, but Spencer couldn't wrap her head around the lies that she was offered. _Who lies about their name?_

But what nagged Spencer more than the lies was whether that dick of a guy was Ashley/Sam's boyfriend. Maybe even her husband. But no, he couldn't be, she shook the thought out of her head.

Spencer had effectively dodged Chelsea's calls, all six of them, to find out how the blind date was. She was even absent minded at work today with her patients, constantly asking them to repeat themselves because she kept replaying the events of the afternoon over in her head. When her shift finally ended Spencer made a hasty retreat to her apartment and spent some time with a bottle of beer and her television.

Not even reading or writing could erase her mind of Ashley so she resorted to the television. No one could have intelligent thoughts when watching those idiots from the Jersey Shore.

But Spencer's new problem was the banging on her door at 2:43 in the morning. Being one of the few doctors that grew up in this town, it made for some interesting late night visits from the town locals. She really did need to find a secret apartment or something of the sort.

But these visits were mainly the local drunk, Freddy, a little too drunk and just looking to have a nice chat with the young pretty doctor he had seen grow up in this town.

To Spencer's surprise she wasn't as annoyed with the thought of old man Freddy visiting her tonight because he might be able to get her mind off of the strange encounter with the unnamed brunette.

As Spencer opened the door already calling out "Good evening Freddy!" she was shocked to find a body falling into her arms.

She looked down and saw a familiar head of brown hair. Then she felt the thick, hot liquid that she has become so familiar with. Her hands were covered in blood, Ashley/Sam's blood and the brunette girl was either passed out or close to passing out in Spencer's arms.

The only thought running through Spencer's head was _Oh shit. _

[][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]

Spencer let out a sigh. She had finally gotten Ashley/Sam stable, well stable-ish, considering most of the procedure was done on her dinning room table.

After Spencer's initial shock of catching Ashley/Sam, Dr. Carlin stepped in rather than the fumbling, angry blonde that was occupying Spencer's body all of thirty seconds earlier. The doctor side of Spencer knew everything else must be put on the back burner until the brunette stopped bleeding.

Despite Ashley/Sam's size, she was heavier than Spencer thought. Luckily, Spencer was able to drag Ashley/Sam to the dinning table.

She took care of the most blatant problem first: the knife in Ashley/Sam's side. She had to remove it to stop the bleeding before she could do anything else.

Spencer was glad when she saw that the knife was in the girl's side, in the wrong position to do any damage to her organs. Spencer removed the knife and immediately put pressure on the wound.

In that moment Spencer panicked; there was nothing she could use to stop the bleeding, but then she noticed duct tape on the kitchen counter behind her, it was a temporary solution, but it gave Spencer time to get the materials she needed and to inspect Ashley/Sam more closely.

Letting out another sigh, Spencer went over everything she did for the sleeping brunette to ensure she didn't forget anything. Spencer had scurried around her apartment and was able to comprise enough material to keep Ashley/Sam alive for the night.

Spencer controlled the bleeding in the brunette's abdomen and stitched her up, stitched up the cracked skull Ashley/Sam had, inspected her ribs, concluding at least one was broken and two bruised before wrapping her up, and finally applied ice to the swelling due to a black eye.

Spencer was exhausted. She was able to get Ashley into her bed by dragging her dining table to her room and gently pushing Ashley off of it (not her most graceful bed switch, but she was alone and tired). All she had to do now was watch Ashley/Sam through the night for fever or any other sighs of complications.

Finding the beaten girl at her door didn't freak Spencer out as much as it should, nor did the fact that Ashley/Sam was able to track down where she lived, no Spencer had bigger worries when it came to the injured brunette.

When inspecting Ashley/Sam, Spencer made a few discoveries. There were a number of various scars all over her body. They looked like past stab wounds, gun shot wounds, and burns.

Spencer was shocked. _Computer programmer my ass_. They were all old wounds that had obviously healed over years, but it was shocking nonetheless. Spencer also noticed two old cuts on Ashley/Sam's wrists. _Suicide attempt_.

After stabilizing the girl, Spencer began searching Ashley/Sam's clothes. Inside the girl's jacket was a wallet that contained four different id's, two of them for Ashley Davies and Sam Franklin while the other two were for Ellie Jones and Trish Harding, all containing the same smiling brunette in each photograph. There were a number of credit cards, to a number of different names, two passports and an obscene amount of cash, more cash than Spencer had ever seen all at once.

She also found two handguns on the girl along with 13 smallish knives (not including the one that was inside the brunette). Spencer was trying very hard not to freak out. It was upon discovering these things that Spencer thought it best to just keep the brunette here, despite her common sense telling her to handcuff this stranger to the bed and run as fast as she could to the local police. But the idea of Sheriff Hank taking this girl to jail made Spencer's insides twist, and not because the Sheriff was older than death.

As Spencer looked up at Ashley/Sam (or maybe even Ellie or Trish), she felt this girl would not hurt her. Not because she was barely in a state to get up, but because in their first hour or so together, Spencer felt nothing but safe and secure around her.

It had been a long time since Spencer felt this way towards anyone, and maybe that is where Spencer's anger came from. Well besides the fact that she was being lied to, but it hurt more because she was being lied to by someone Spencer enjoyed. She thought back to Ashley/Sam pushing the broken glass out of her path. If nothing else, that instance of protection from this girl was enough to convince Spencer that she did not intend to harm her.

But what confused Spencer was why she wouldn't report the brutal attack the curly haired girl received. Spencer should go to the police, it was her duty to report these incidences, but the fact that Ashley/Sam herself did not just go to the hospital or the police, instead finding Spencer, indicated that police involvement was something Ashley/Sam didn't want.

Spencer could understand why police involvement might get a little tricky considering what she found Ashley/Sam carrying. It wasn't the first time she had seen a gun, but it was the first time she touched one, and it was definitely the first time a gun, let alone two, were inside Spencer's home.

Spencer would just have to wait. Wait for the brunette to wake up, and then there would be answers, or so she hoped.

* * *

Ashley felt heavy. Everything felt heavy, her body, her breathing, even her eyelids. She faintly felt a damp cloth on her forehead and the quiet "shhh"-ing that was calming her nerves. She tried, tried with all her might to open her eyes, but she was just lulled back to sleep.

* * *

Ashley heard murmuring; her eyes were closed, but she head voices. Panic flooded through her body, but she calmed down when she recognized one of the voices. _Spencer_. Ashley's eyes slowly opened, registering that it seemed like early afternoon. She searched around the room for the Spencer, but soon realized that Spencer was at her front door, blocking the visitor's eye line into the bedroom. _Smart girl_ Ashley thought, grateful for Spencer's discrepancy.

"Chelsea, I know I didn't call you back about the date, but I really can't talk right now."

"Spencer Carlin you let me in right now, I want to hear all about it! Why won't you- OH SHIT! Is she still here? Spencer you dog!"

"No! Chelsea! It's not what you think!"

But before Spencer could argue further, Chelsea cut her off, "Don't worry Spencer, I am not judging you. I am actually proud of you! I'll let you lovebirds be, but I expect full details ASAP!" And with a sigh from Spencer, she finally closed the door and looked in Ashley's direction.

Spencer had a slight blush painting her cheeks and she looked exhausted, but she let out a wide smile when their eyes met one another. Spencer was relieved, she was worried about Ashley's fever, but she was awake and lucid now, and that was definitely positive.

Ashley tried to sit up in the bed, but was met with quiet a bit of pain. She let out a groan and winced, while Spencer rushed into her bedroom to help the struggling brunette.

"You shouldn't try to move too much. I was limited with materials here, so you underwent a few procedures lacking any painkillers other than normal Tylenol. You are going to be pretty sore for a while, not to mention you had a pretty bad concussion, and at least one broken rib and two bruised ones. Oh yea, and the knife that was sticking out of your abdomen. That will probably hurt for a while."

Despite herself, Ashley smiled at Spencer's obvious sarcasm. She knew she owed the blonde her life. She also knew that she had a lot of explaining to do, but telling the truth and having normal conversations involving honest answers threw Ashley off.

She had no idea how to go about this. So she said the first thing she could think of, "I don't think I have ever slept with a stuffed animal before." Referring to the small teddy bear that was lying by Ashley's side unintentionally.

The blonde let out a burst of a laugh, before composing herself and grabbing the small teddy and turning a light shade of pink.

"That was probably the last thing I was expecting you to say. But I'm glad that Christopher could be your first." There was a slight pause while Ashley smiled and then the blonde blushed even further, "You know what I mean."

Spencer was looking down at Christopher, when she remembered the girl in front of her was injured. Dr. Carlin kicked into gear at this point. Spencer checked Ashley's pulse, her breathing, gently checked the injured ribs, and looked over the covered stitches.

Everything seemed normal. Ashley had a slight fever, but that is normal considering what Ashley's body had been through. After Spencer had inspected the brunette, she dragged a chair towards the bed and settled down.

"Now Ashley/Sam, what the hell is your name?" Ashley gave a sheepish smile towards Spencer, knowing now she was going to have to explain a few things. "My name is Ashley, Ashley Davies."

Spencer smiled; at least she knew one thing about the girl in front of her now. "Okay Ashley Davies, what the fuck?"

Ashley let out a small sigh before beginning…

* * *

**Glad you guys are liking this so far. Thanks again to everyone that added me to alerts and favorites, and THANK YOU SO MUCH for reviewing. It really does help. Just a few things:**

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	5. Finding A New Partner

Chapter 5: Finding a New Partner

Spencer had been staring, judging, and weighing everything that Ashley had said, not that she had said much, but the initial truth packed the punch Ashley thought it would.

Spencer was trying to figure out if what Ashley was saying was true; Ashley didn't seem crazy, but you never know.

"So you work for the CIA?" Spencer said, with clear uncertainty in her voice. "And you were stabbed while on mission?"

This was basically all Ashley had divulged after offering her real name. Ashley was uneasy: she was hurt and vulnerable in a bed, had received help from Spencer, and was now in a position in which she had to tell the truth (something she hadn't done in 13 plus years) to gain some sort of trust with the blonde. So she told Spencer as little as possible in hopes of it being okay.

Ashley needed a plan, but when she looked at Spencer she found it somewhat hard to concentrate; Ashley decided to blame her lack of focus on the concussion.

"Yes." Was Ashley's brief reply and she could read the disappointment and skepticism on Spencer's face.

"So instead of going to a hospital, or even some CIA underground base thing, you came to my door almost dead? I never even told you where I live!"

Spencer had decided she was allowed to freak out. There was a beautiful girl in her bed that she had to operate on using her IKEA dining table instead of an OR that may or may not be working for the government. _Yeah, I am definitely allowed to freak out_, Spencer thought.

"Ashley, I get that you don't tell the truth a lot, or at all based on our previous encounters, and maybe even because of your job, but I need you to be very honest and open right now because I am on the verge of a mental breakdown which will involve cops, me passing out or something, and you in a big mess of trouble. I do have two older brothers, you know."

Ashley smirked at this, she could probably kill her two brothers in less than 30 seconds, without a weapon, but she let Spencer continue, "So, please, enough with the games and tell me what's going on."

This was a strange situation, definitely a first for Ashley, so she decided to go against all her training, all her basic instincts of self interest and do what she so badly wanted to do when she first talked to the blonde: tell the truth.

"I live in Los Angeles and I work, well I guess worked, out of the CIA Los Angeles headquarters. I was sent here to investigate a man believed to be involved with weapon smuggling in and out of America, and to steal some documents he had on him. Yesterday was one of my few days off and I decided to stay in town so I wouldn't have to travel back to steal the papers.

That man who ran up to us in front of the hospital was another CIA agent, Aiden. He came to tell me that we were going to kidnap the man I had been investigating, but it turned out he was sent here by the CIA to kill me. I figured it out when we were supposedly waiting for the target. I fought him and told him to go back to Los Angeles saying he had killed me. I found your address in the phonebook at a near by pay phone."

Ashley was nervous, but she let out a sigh of relief. Telling the truth wasn't that bad, but when she looked up at Spencer, she saw tears brimming in her eyes. _Shit, what the hell did I do wrong?_ was Ashley's only thought, but Spencer started speaking before Ashley could do anything.

"So you came here because you couldn't go to the hospital?" Spencer asked, and Ashley gave a small nod, her eyes never leaving Spencer's "And why does the CIA want you dead?"

Another sigh, even Ashley wasn't too sure on the answer to that. "Well, from what I gathered from Aiden, it is because I am an unorthodox recruit that has been working for the CIA for far too long. I am apparently a risk to the country."

With tears still in Spencer's eyes she slowly grabbed Ashley's hand. Spencer's heart was broken. The poor girl in front of her has lost everything, her life, because she served her country. She was stuck here without a friend in the world, and Ashley, someone who obviously doesn't trust many, if anyone, had trusted her.

It was an overwhelming feeling Spencer was sure she shouldn't feel. The shock in Ashley's eyes the second Spencer grabbed her hand was almost enough to make the blonde laugh out loud and/or cry for the poor brunette.

"Well, thank you Ashley, for trusting me that much." Ashley was speechless. Spencer's tears were tears of sympathy for her.

When leaving Aiden in the alley, Ashley never thought why her first instinct was to go to the blonde doctor. But now that Spencer mentioned it, Ashley realized she did trust Spencer. She had trusted Spencer with more information than anyone, since Ashley was a child. It was almost overwhelming, but the hand holding Ashley's kept her calm.

"By the way, the CIA doesn't have 'CIA underground base things'." Spencer smiled; she could tell Ashley was uncomfortable, so she didn't mind the light tone that Ashley had taken.

Spencer noted to go easy on the emotional stuff with the brunette. Spencer also noted Ashley continued to hold her hand. Spencer knew she should have more doubts, more questions, more hesitance towards the girl in front of her, but she couldn't find it in herself to fight with the brunette. So together they sat.

Spencer finally got up and grabbed water for the brunette and herself. Ashley gratefully took the bottle and drank a good portion of it.

"Thank you Spencer. I mean thank you for all of this- saving me, not reporting me to the police. I need to get up. I need to get out of here-" but before the Ashley could get out of the bed, all the while noticing pain hitting her entire body with her small movements, Spencer stopped her.

"Ashley you are in no condition to get out of this bed, let alone leave for somewhere else. As a doctor, I won't allow it, and as a human it is just too cruel. You have to stay here until you are in better condition, especially if I can't take you in to the hospital."

"Spencer, I understand your concern, but I don't think you understand the situation. I have to disappear, and I have made it so I can, but I have to go to my hotel, collect things I need and burn the rest; I have to get out of this town. I don't think Aiden will tell them anything, but in case they come check, I need to be safe, be gone. If they find me, all the work you put in to keeping me alive will be thrown out the window because I can't fight in this condition."

"Well, the last thing they will expect is for you to stay here! They may come here, but they will have no idea that I know you, or that you are staying here! This Aiden guy saw me yelling at you, they won't assume you came to me. No one will know.

And I can go to your hotel! I can get all this stuff. No one will suspect me! You can't do much of anything in your condition. Stay here until you are on your feet, then you can go to whatever place you plan on going to."

"I can't put you in danger like that Spencer. The longer I am here, the worse it is for you!"

"Shut up Ashley. I am a big girl. I want- no insist that I get to help. You won't stand a chance with the injuries you sustained."

Ashley sighed. She had a feeling that Spencer was right. She couldn't see herself moving and surviving the way she had to in the condition she was in. But she couldn't let the blonde go to her hotel. It was out of the question, Ashley had put her in too much danger as is.

"Spencer, you can't go to the hotel. They might see you, and they will catch you, torture you, and kill you if they have to. It is not safe, and I have already put you in too much danger. You don't know what you are doing."

"So, teach me! I am not letting you go to that hotel alone. So it's either me, or both of us. Plus I can get a car because I doubt you can walk that far right now."

Ashley sighed again. Spencer knew she had won. Ashley looked at the blonde with a smug little smile on her face, knowing that Spencer had convinced her to bring the blonde along to clean out the room.

"Wipe that smile off your face. I swear it isn't this easy to beat me in arguments."

Spencer's smile only got bigger and Ashley, despite herself, was wearing a grin that matched the blonde in front of her.

* * *

Ashley was exhausted. She never liked having a partner when working in the CIA, but at least these people were trained. Spencer was ridiculous; she was cute as hell, but nevertheless ridiculous.

When Spencer managed to borrow a car from her father and told Ashley before they left she had to change, Ashley did not expect Spencer to come out in all black (including a black ski mask to cover her face.) With a pout Spencer changed into a normal outfit and they were off to Ashley's hotel.

Lucky for Ashley, this was a small town and Spencer was well known. Ashley had provided Spencer with a cover story for her own disappearance, and an excuse for Spencer to get into Ashley's room. Spencer told the hotel desk clerk (who, according to Spencer, use to be the boy that would eat the uncooked macaroni from art projects and never managed to have his fly up in 2nd grade) that Sam was a friend of hers from college and she had to go home suddenly. Spencer was only here to pay her bill and collect the belongings the brunette left. The guy behind the desk didn't seem to have gotten any brighter since 2nd grade, but this worked in their favor.

Spencer then returned to the car to help the brunette to her room. Ashley had been scanning the area looking for possible threats. Everything seemed fine, but Ashley still brought her gun with her. There was no way she was going to let the blonde get identified because of all this.

Spencer kept turning corners and entering rooms in full Charlie's Angels poses (sadly, including a fake gun made out of her hands) while Ashley chuckled despite the pain it brought to her ribs. After gathering everything in Ashley's room, they left, without any major incidents (not counting a knocked over lamp from Spencer practicing her "spy moves").

Needless to say, Spencer's high spirits and clumsy spy work had Ashley on edge, being the only one fully aware of how dangerous the situation was. Ashley would need to inform the blonde, almost scare her into understanding the situation. She was tired, but relieved to finally be back in the house.

Spencer immediately put her back in bed because her fever was on the rise, and the color of Ashley's face was off. Spencer had managed to get some stronger painkillers for Ashley after returning the car, along with some light chicken broth for Ashley to try and eat.

Spencer's constant care of Ashley was something Ashley wasn't use to at all. And as much as Ashley wanted to protest to Spencer's help, she didn't have the strength. As soon as Ashley finished eating, she found herself quickly drifting to sleep with images of the blonde doctor somersaulting into her hotel room.


	6. All Nighters and Afternoon Breakfast

**Thank you for all the reviews guys! It really does help, so please don't be shy to leave them! Here's the next chapter, hope you like it!**

Chapter 6: All Nighters and Afternoon Breakfast

Spencer was tired. Who knew being a spy could be so draining? She hadn't done a somersault since her high school cheer days, and after feeling the soreness in her limbs she remembered why.

She knew her spy routine was silly and way over the top, but it was fun and exciting, not to mention it made the slumbering brunette smile seeing her goof about. Spencer could tell smiling wasn't one of the things Ashley did on a regular basis.

Spencer was worried about Ashley, knowing that leaving bed was probably not one of the best things for Ashley's medical condition. The blonde was offered some comfort when Ashley stated she had sustained much worse injuries in the past, and this "was nothing compared to Spain."

Spencer never got a chance to question the brunette about her mishaps in Spain because Ashley was already asleep by the time she had taken the bowl of soup back to the kitchen and returned to her bedroom.

Spencer was running on little to no sleep, and was starting to feel the effects. It was still early in the day, only around 6:45 in the evening, but she felt like crawling into a hole and sleeping for weeks. Alas, Spencer knew that she needed to watch Ashley. Besides, the lack of sleep felt familiar and nostalgic to her med school days.

So she tidied her apartment a bit, called both the hospital and the paper to request a few days off from each, and picked a book to read in the giant chair she had placed next to her bed so she could check on Ashley when necessary.

She had managed to squeeze a little more information from Ashley this afternoon. Ashley gave a more descript account of her fight with Aiden, or as Spencer fondly called him, the douche from outside the hospital. She also learned that Ashley was an expert with knives, especially throwing knives. Ashley also told her that she had been with the CIA for 13 years, which is a long time, considering how young they both were. If the age in Ashley's id was correct, that meant Ashley joined the CIA at the young age of 15 years old, which seemed terrifying to the blonde haired doctor.

But those were the only extra details Spencer got from Ashley. Trying to get the brunette to talk about herself was like pulling teeth. But what made it all okay was Spencer could tell that Ashley was honestly trying to be somewhat open. Spencer could only imagine what 13 years in the CIA as a secret agent could do to hinder a personality and feelings of trust.

They had cleaned out the room fairly well. There was no trace left of the brunette at all, which is exactly what needed to be done. Had Aiden actually completed his mission, he would have performed the same tasks.

Besides the extra weapons, there was nothing that Spencer could see that was too out of the ordinary: clothes, laptop, and a few files. Ashley then destroyed her laptop and cell phone by having Spencer run over both, took apart anything she could and had Spencer throw them away in different dumpsters.

It was small things like that, that Spencer would never think to do, but that is probably why Ashley is the spy, and Spencer is the girl trying to wear a black ski mask in 70-degree weather, during the day.

Spencer couldn't stop mulling over what Ashley had said about being an "unorthodox recruit". What the hell could that mean? Part of it probably had to do with the fact that Ashley was so young when recruited, but Spencer knew enough to not question the brunette about it now.

As Spencer looked over at the sleeping girl, she could see Ashley's discomfort. Spencer slowly took a damp towel and wiped Ashley's hot forehead, trying to relieve some of the pain. Ashley really was one of the most beautiful girls Spencer had ever seen. Spencer brushed some hair out of Ashley's face, but quickly stopped when she realized how strange this could be if the brunette woke up.

Leaving the cloth on her head, Spencer sat back trying to figure out who Ashley Davies was and what the hell they were going to do. Spencer couldn't hide in her house forever with the injured brunette. She would need some sort of cover story to tell her family and friends, but needed to wait a little longer so Ashley would be in less physical pain. _I'm sure Ashley will think of something to tell them._

It was far too much to have to mull over when she was this tired. So instead of worrying now, Spencer lifted up her book and began to read, losing herself with every turned page, but every now and then she would glance over her book to check on the brunette.

* * *

Ashley was groggy when she woke up in the morning, or by the looks of it, mid-afternoon. Gingerly sitting up in the bed Ashley glanced towards the uncomfortable looking blonde. Guilt instantly rushed through Ashley as she watched Spencer sleeping in the big leather chair next to the bed.

Obviously the blonde didn't intend on sleeping there given that she had a book open on her stomach and her reading glasses were crooked on her face, but Ashley felt bad that she had taken over the bed. Despite Spencer's haphazard position on the big armchair she seemed dead to the world, and was slightly snoring.

Along with feeling guilty, Ashley had the overwhelming urge to "Awww" the cute little blonde in front of her, but she had more self-restraint than to coo at the sleeping doctor.

Ashley felt much better today than she did yesterday. Her injuries were not close to the worst that she has had. Hell, she was just glad she hadn't gotten shot, again. It also helped that Spencer got her some pain medication. Ashley quickly popped two pills that were sitting on the bedside table and got out of the bed. It was slightly uncomfortable, but nothing she couldn't handle.

The brunette walked towards Spencer and slowly took the book and glasses from the sleeping girl. Ashley wanted to move the girl to the bed, but knew with her injuries she couldn't lift her, so Ashley slightly shook the blonde and in her most soothing voice said, "Spencer, Spppeeeeennnnccceeeerrrr. Wake up for a second, we need to move you to the bed."

In return, the blonde mumbled something and barely opened her eyes while giving Ashley a goofy smile. Spencer slowly got up, a little unsteadily, and Ashley walked her to the bed. After covering the blonde with a blanket Spencer let out a sleepy "Thanks" before falling back into a deep sleep.

Ashley couldn't help but smile at how cute the blonde was, completely unaware of even moving to the bed. To Ashley, it was completely fitting that Spencer was such a heavy sleeper. She would have stayed and watched the blonde for a little while longer if not for the urgent need to use the bathroom and shower.

Ashley grabbed some of the clothes they had recovered from her hotel room and went into the bathroom. After her shower, which seemed like heaven, Ashley was able to look at all her injuries. Given that the blonde had done everything on the dining table, she was thoroughly impressed.

The stitches in her side would heal well with a barely there scar, as would the gash on her head. Her ribs looked battered and bruised, but nothing that wouldn't be fixed with time. And her black eye wasn't as bad as she thought it would be when she was initially hit. Ashley knew she was lucky; things with Aiden could have ended a lot worse.

It was only when Ashley realized she needed a toothbrush did she notice Spencer had purchased one for her. When she looked at it more closely she realized the blonde had not bought her any old toothbrush, but one with Garfield on it. The brunette couldn't help but blush at the thought the blonde put into picking her out a toothbrush.

Ashley knew that she was indebted to the blonde, but had no idea how to thank her. _The best way would probably be to leave, so Spencer would actually be safe_. Ashley shook the thought out of her head. She knew what she should do, but had agreed to stay with Spencer until she had recovered. Ashley was taken out of her thoughts when she smelled something delicious.

Walking out of the bathroom, Ashley spotted Spencer in her pj's flipping a pancake. She smiled at the blonde's disheveled hair and the big fluffy slippers she was wearing. It was a sight Ashley could get use to. Spencer turned around with a bright smile and tired eyes.

"I knew I didn't dream you moving me to the bed. For a second I thought the whole thing was a dream but then I could smell you on my pillow. Not that you smell bad! It was just a different smell then my normal pillow! I like how you smell. Wait, that's weird right? Let me start over. Morning Ashley, or well, good afternoon! I hope you like pancakes." Spencer was smiling and blushing and Ashley couldn't help but return the smile as she walked into the kitchen.

"Good afternoon Spencer. I would love some pancakes."

"Good because I don't think I have any more eggs anyways. I am surprised to see you up and walking considering your condition." Spencer made her way over to a cutting board on the kitchen counter and began to slowly cut some strawberries.

Ashley was surprised how nervous she was watching the blonde use a knife. In the short time she had known Spencer, she came to realize she wasn't the most graceful of girls. Before Spencer could cut off a finger, Ashley took the knife out of the blonde's hands.

"At least let me help cutting the strawberries since you already started on the pancakes." Spencer conceded and looked on in amazement at how fast and precise Ashley's cutting was. As impressive as it was, Spencer shuttered at the real reason Ashley was so good with the knife. _So 13 years in the CIA trains you to chop better than Bobby Flay_, Spencer thought.

"I think sleeping for like 14 plus hours helps. My injuries aren't that bad. As I said, I have been way worse. I will have to thank my doctor for my speedy recovery," Ashley said with a sly grin. "I am pretty sore though."

Ashley noticed Spencer's gaze on her cutting. Using knives seemed like second nature to Ashley now and she slightly blushed at Spencer's obvious staring.

"I told you I was pretty good with these," Ashley stated twirling the knife in her hand trying to comfort the obviously stunned doctor.

"I believe you. I will just make you cut everything from now on." Spencer replied with a cheeky smile.

They both went about making breakfast and enjoying the radio Spencer had turned on at some point. In the small kitchen they moved around one another with a certain grace, both always standing closer than necessary without actually touching. Spencer was making the pancakes, and a mess everywhere, with Ashley subtly cleaning up all of Spencer's little spills. They were both grinning while Spencer flipped the last pancake onto a plate with Ashley standing close by.

Breakfast was eaten in relative silence, with the music still playing and the girls trading sections from the morning paper. Ashley was basking in how normal this all seemed. She hadn't had such a domestic morning in the better part of 20 years, it was a nice surprise and she welcomed the feeling. She liked helping the blonde in the kitchen and hearing quips about Ashley drinking plain black coffee (which Spencer referred to as undrinkable) and even being able to poke fun at the blonde while she put more sugar than coffee into her mug.

Spencer was also aware of how nice this afternoon breakfast was. She enjoyed having Ashley around even when they were simply sitting and reading. She could tell that Ashley was enjoying these normal, mundane daily tasks. She seemed relaxed and happy to just sit with the blonde.

The only time Spencer was reminded of Ashley's other life was when Ashley quickly pulled a small knife out (of seemingly nowhere) to cut the grapefruit Spencer had grabbed from the fruit bowl on the table. Spencer's eyes went wide, but she didn't say a word as Ashley handed her the cut fruit. It was hard to imagine the girl across from her was trained to kill a person in a variety of different ways. It was even harder to imagine when Ashley looked from her paper and Spencer spotted some crumbs by her lip.

Spencer let out a little giggle and the brunette looked at her strangely. "You have something- here just let me…" And Spencer cupped Ashley's face, wiping the crumbs off. Spencer's smiling face became serious as Ashley stared into the blondes eyes.

Ashley, finally shaking out of the moment, stood up and mumbled about getting breakfast all cleaned up while grabbing their plates and heading into the kitchen.

Spencer was shocked at the intensity of the moment and was slightly relieved when Ashley broke it. _Because this situation isn't complicated enough_ Spencer couldn't help but think. Glancing down at the paper she remembered what she read.

"So that douche from outside- I mean, that Aiden guy, did you read the article, I assume is about him?"

Ashley turned from the sink and gave a slight nod to the blonde. The article had reported a supposed mugging of a young man that was visiting from Los Angeles. He was injured, with multiple stab wounds, a broken knee, and was badly beaten but was discharged from the hospital today to return home. The article was focused more on warning the small town of a criminal on the loose rather than focus on Aiden, much to the relief of both girls.

"You think he has already told the CIA you are dead?" Ashley made her way back towards the dining table and could see the slight worry in the blonde's eyes over the entire situation.

"Yes, I am sure as soon as he was able to, he called it in saying I was taken care of." It occurred to Ashley how strange it was to be talking about her supposed death. She was still pondering this when her and Spencer both reached for the syrup bottle on the table, their hands connecting over it.

They both looked at each other, neither of them moving their hands away from one another. Spencer softly spoke, "So, Ashley, I just have one question… How's it feel to be dead?" Spencer was gazing at the brunette with her bright blue eyes while their hands were still joined.

Ashley glanced down at their overlapping hands on top of the syrup bottle. With a lopsided grin, Ashley looked at Spencer and replied, "It's not that bad." And despite everything, Spencer believed Ashley wholeheartedly.


	7. Spencer's Ashley

**Sorry for the delay! Hope you enjoy and thank you to everyone that reviews and added my story to their favorites! It really helps.**

Chapter 7: Spencer's Ashley

After breakfast, Spencer got Ashley settled on her couch, claiming that the brunette shouldn't be moving around so much. Ashley laughed at the blonde because she felt she was really starting to feel better; being in the CIA for so long, injuries just became second nature. Despite her efforts, Ashley found herself sitting on the couch under a blanket waiting for Spencer to shower and get ready for the day, or at this point, the afternoon.

Spencer emerged in a casual outfit and settled on the couch facing Ashley. "I just want to check on all the injuries, if you don't mind." Ashley smiled at the young doctor and nodded her head.

Spencer was much more concerned with Ashley's injuries than Ashley was. Spencer checked all the stitches, Ashley's slightly swollen eye, and her ribs before letting out a sigh of relief knowing they were healing properly. In the meantime, Ashley was enjoying having the blonde so close._ I have got to stop thinking like that_ Ashley thought while fighting the urge to groan at how easily Spencer could get under her skin.

"Thank you again for everything Spencer. I will be out of here in a few days, since you insist on me staying longer." Ashley knew she had to leave soon, she was putting Spencer in danger, and Ashley was also starting to get concerned over how attached she was becoming to the blonde. She needed to get away for everyone's sake.

"A few days? Let's try a month buddy. I can't have you leaving when your stitches aren't even out! Especially if you plan on going out to do crazy, spy, CIA avoiding things. You have to stay longer! I would never be able to sleep if I just sent you out there all broken."

"Spencer, I am far from broken. I told you I have been way worse, you should have seen Sp-" Before the brunette could finish, she was interrupted by Spencer.

"Spain. I know, I know how this is like nothing compared to Spain and who knows where else, Jamaica or Sweden, or wherever, but this is the first time someone has stumbled to my door half dead. And after all the time I put into saving you, I don't want you dying just because you get all antsy and can't stay a few days longer. Stay a month, please? I am asking you to stay for me, my peace of mind."

The blonde was worried. She honestly didn't want to see Ashley get hurt again. It scared her half to death to see Ashley's almost lifeless face, she never wanted to see the curly haired girl like that again.

Ashley was at a loss. She knew she should leave. Not only did she need to compile a new life and identity while avoiding the CIA, she was worried about how hard it would be to leave the blonde since she was already unhappy about leaving after knowing her for only three days.

On top of that, Ashley didn't want to lose another argument to the blonde because it was adorable when Spencer pouted. _I am soo not a push over._

"Okay, I'll make you a deal. Two weeks, no longer than that. That is even enough time for you to be the one to remove my stitches." _Good job Ashley, not a push over my ass_.

Spencer grinned, two weeks was certainly better than a few days, so she agreed to the deal. "You know, one of these days you are going to have to tell me what happened in Spain…"

Ashley laughed. "All in good time, all in good time." If Spencer couldn't handle seeing what happened with Aiden, she might die if she heard about Spain.

"You know Spencer, I can't keep stealing your bed. I felt so guilty this morning when I saw you sleeping on that chair. I can go to a hotel or something, it isn't a big deal."

"No!" Spencer definitely didn't mean to scream that at Ashley, but she really didn't want the brunette leaving so soon. "I mean no, you don't have to do that Ashley. It's a big bed, we can share, or I could sleep on the couch, but you need to sleep, and on a bed, despite how well you think you are healing."

Ashley smiled again; she liked how eager Spencer was to keep her here. If Ashley had to be stuck here for two weeks, she wanted to spend as much time with the blonde as she could.

"But we do have to figure out what I am going to say to my friends and family. I can't just hide from them for two weeks with you. They are probably going to have to meet you, so we need a cover."

"I have to meet your family?" Ashley was panicked at this thought. She had met countless ambassadors, presidents, even royalty, but meeting a girl's family was never something that Ashley had to do.

Spencer grinned, it was nice seeing the calm and collected Ashley get nervous over something as silly as meeting her family. Spencer and her family were pretty close, so hiding the brunette would prove to be fairly difficult, it was the only solution that Spencer could come up with.

"Don't worry Ashley, they are nice. Nosey, but nice. I am sure a big, bad ass spy like you can handle my dad and two brothers."

Ashley was getting ready to tell Spencer that she wasn't worried at all (despite having bats in her stomach at the mere thought of meeting them) when she heard a key in the front door lock. Ashley jumped up, pulling the blonde behind her body and reaching for her knives before the door was completely open.

Spencer's head was still reeling from the Ashley's sudden movements when she spotted Chelsea walking through the front door. Spencer quickly grabbed Ashley's arm that was ready to throw a knife directly into her best friend while shouting out a quick, "Chelsea! What are you doing here, and why are you breaking into my apartment?"

Ashley instantly relaxed. Whether it was from Spencer continuing to hold onto her arm or the fact that it wasn't a CIA officer here to kill them both, the spy couldn't be sure. _It is definitely because she wasn't a CIA officer_. Even Ashley had to stop herself from rolling her eyes at her own self-conscious.

"Spencer! I don't think it is considered breaking in if I have a key." Chelsea let out a laugh, while the blonde nervously fidgeted behind Ashley. _Aww, Ashley was protecting me from whoever was coming in_ Spencer now realized, finally allowing for her brain to catch up with the current events happening in her home.

"Actually, it is considered breaking and entering even if you have a key, if you are not a resident in the home, or given an invitation by the owner." Ashley replied before even thinking.

Both Chelsea and Spencer gave the brunette a strange look. Spencer maneuvered her way to stand next to Ashley, instead of behind her, but never let go of the brunette's arm, wanting to keep her calm in the situation. _Yea, that is definitely the reason I'm still touching Ashley_.

"Well, thanks for the tip, strange brunette who looks like she got ran over by a car." Chelsea was confused. When her friend ushered her out of the door yesterday, she assumed she was rolling around in a bed with Ashley Stanford. Unless Spencer got a lot whorey-er in the last 48 hours, Chelsea assumed that Ashley Stanford was not the girl Spencer was trying to hide from her. So this left the question of whom the fuck was standing in her best friend's living room looking like she finished a boxing match while Spencer was showering?

"Chelsea, this is Ashley. Ashley, this is Chelsea, my best friend." Spencer could see the confusion all over her friend's face. She knew this must look weird, especially considering that the blonde was still gently grasping Ashley's arm and had obviously just gotten out of the shower. Never mind the fact that this Ashley was definitely a different Ashley than the one she was suppose to meet on her blind date.

Ashley was still trying to figure out where her California State breaking and entering turrets came from. Usually she was much cooler in surprising situations. She was a spy for god's sake. _Get it together Davies. A girl touches your arm and you turn into a drooling mess._ Ashley had to break the tension somehow so she tried to put her spy skills to use by lying, "It's nice to meet you Chelsea. Spencer has told me so much about you!"

"That's nice of her. Hey Spence, you mind telling me anything about Ashley here?"

Chelsea didn't mean to sound like a bitch, but she was really confused. She walked further into her best friend's apartment and found herself on the couch with Spencer, while Ashley mumbled out a, "I'll give you guys a few minutes," and headed towards the kitchen.

"Okay, spill, Spence. Who is that cute brunette? How'd she get that black eye and cut on her head? Is she the one that you were hiding here yesterday? What happened to my Ashley? You had sex with someone that was injured?"

"Whoa, whoa, one question at a time. It is kind of a long story, but I guess I have to tell you." Spencer was screwed, they never came up with a cover and her friend was far too eager to be brushed off now.

Ashley was in the kitchen, but luckily she had a great view of the living room from the kitchen counter. She couldn't hear the two girls speaking, but she was damned good at reading lips. _Okay Spencer, don't blow this, keep it simple_ was all Ashley could think.

"Well, see, I was running late for my blind date. I got caught up writing- it's a great story Chelsea!" Chelsea gave Spencer a harsh look, conveying the fact that Chelsea wanted to hear about the hot brunette and not about Spencer's story.

"Okay, sorry, so I was like 40 minutes late, but I rushed over to the coffee shop hoping that your Ashley was still there. Then I saw my Ashley" Spencer grinned at how "my Ashley" sounded, "sitting at a table reading the paper, and I assumed she was my date. So I walked up to her and started apologizing and talking a mile a minute like usual. And my Ashley was giving me this funny/amused look, so I just kept talking and I mentioned that I was writing, and then she asked me about my writing. Anyways, we just sort of started talking and then I found out from the waitress that my Ashley wasn't your Ashley, so I got really mad at her and left. But then she chased me down and my Ashley apologized and said she was just really interested in what I was saying. So then my Ashley walked me to work because I had this shift and it was like really great and nice and she was so sweet."

Ashley was never happier for the ability to read lips until this moment. Hearing Spencer giving Chelsea little details and the "cute things" that she did when they first met was great. Ashley started to feel a little guilty eavesdropping, but obviously she had to pay attention so she could hear the cover story. _Yea, right Davies_.

"So you never met my Ashley?" Chelsea asked, and the blonde nodded. "What are the odds of that Spence! It sounds like such a weird book or romantic comedy that Jennifer Aniston would star in." Spencer couldn't help but laugh at this because if Chelsea knew the whole truth, she would definitely see how strange the entire situation really was.

"So was your Ashley all injured when you met her?"

Without thinking the blonde replied, "No, I had to save her and fix her up."

Chelsea was shocked, "What do you mean save her?"

Both the blonde and the brunette were thinking the same thing: _Oh shit._

"Um, well, as I was walking into the hospital, Ashley was walking out into the street, and she had this accident… Um- someone hit her with a car!"

_Oh god_ Ashley thought, so much for a simple cover story, but she continued to watch Spencer and Chelsea interact.

"No way Spence! Someone hit her with a car?"

"Yes! That is what happened, and luckily I saw it. And I rushed over to help her." Spencer winced at how bad this cover was turning out, it sounded like a corny soap opera.

"Who was the person that hit her?"

"Um, I don't know, it was a hit and run!"

"Man, first a mugging to a poor tourist and now a hit and run! What is happening to this town? Why didn't I read about it in the paper, and why is your Ashley here and not in the hospital?"

Ashley was now pacing in the kitchen. This story had gone from bad to worse, but Chelsea seemed to be buying it. It seems that Chelsea never noticed that when her friend lied she constantly touched her face. At least some of the cover story was based in truth. That made it a little easier to believe. Then again, the truth seems much more far-fetched than the story Spencer was coming up with.

"Those are great questions Chelsea." Spencer was a little stuck. She looked into her kitchen and saw the pacing brunette. Spencer knew she had to come up with something.

"You didn't hear about it because we never reported it to the cops! Because um, Ashley doesn't have health insurance! I snuck her into the hospital and fixed her up without telling anyone! Otherwise she couldn't afford the health care. And if we reported it to the cops then they would ask how she was treated and then I would get in trouble! So I saved her, and she kind of saved me too. But see my Ashley is from out of town, and I refused to let her go home alone, so I told her to stay here until she was healed. But we haven't, like, done anything Chelsea, I swear. I have just been taking care of her."

Ashley wanted to laugh. That story was by far one of the most complicated covers she has been involved in, but at least it is somewhat close to the truth. Based on all of Spencer's spy skills, it is best if the blonde wasn't forced to lie too much.

"Spencer. That is honestly the craziest story ever. You guys are like meant to be. I mean come on, imagine telling your grandkids that is how you met the love of your life!"

Spencer's eyes got wide at the mention of this kind of relationship with the brunette spy. Spencer and Chelsea both turned their heads towards the kitchen when they heard something break in there.

Spencer looked at a sheepish and slightly anxious looking brunette. "Sorry guys, I just dropped a cup." Spencer wanted to laugh out loud at how cute the brunette was; she obviously heard Chelsea's comment about grandkids.

"Hey, Spencer's Ashley, come here so I can apologize and get to know you better!" Chelsea cheerfully hollered from the living room.

Ashley shuffled into the room with a smile.

"Well it seems like you lucked out in meeting my best friend Spencer here."

Spencer slightly blushed. The brunette smiled at Chelsea, but looked at Spencer while she said, "Chelsea, you have no idea how lucky I am to have met Spencer."

This comment caused the blonde to blush even more and for Chelsea to chuckle at both of the girls. Chelsea's only reply to the brunette was, "Spencer's Ashley, I think I am going to like you."


	8. 341

Chapter 8: 341

Chelsea didn't stay long chatting with the girls. Just long enough for Ashley to state she was between jobs at the moment (understatement of the year) and hear how Spencer and Chelsea had met.

Apparently both girls were at the park one afternoon when they were 5 years old. A boy, with a slight crush on Spencer, knocked her ice cream out of her hands. Chelsea had watched the scene unfold and at the age of 5 decided the worst thing a boy could do to a girl was ruin their ice cream. Spencer said that Chelsea was literally "a ball of fury" and tackled said boy to the floor.

In Chelsea's anger towards the boy, she had dropped her own ice cream and began crying along with Spencer while still sitting on the small boy. Paula, Spencer's mother, came to both girls' rescue by buying them both another ice cream cone.

"Spencer's mom was the best. She even told me that she was glad that someone was there to look out for Spencer, instead of telling me not to hit that little boy." While Chelsea went on about Spencer's mom, Ashley noticed Spencer quietly sitting next to her friend smiling while looking down at her tattoo. At that point Ashley realized a topic change was necessary.

But it was Chelsea who brought all three girls' attention to Ashley. "Hey Ashley, you are bleeding." Ashley looked down and realized her side was in fact bleeding; she had ripped a stitch in her fast movements from earlier.

The blonde was by Ashley before Ashley could even process why she was bleeding.

"Ash, you must have ripped some stitches when you jumped up from the couch. We need to get you re-stitched and a clean bandage on it." The blonde was in doctor mode, but Ashley could detect the slight worry in the blue eyes. Ashley had also noticed the new nickname she received from the blonde. No one had called her Ash in over 14 years. The brunette didn't mind it coming from Spencer though.

"Don't worry Spencer, it doesn't really hurt. I wouldn't have noticed it if Chelsea hadn't pointed it out."

"And with that ladies, I will be leaving you to it. I would rather be anywhere else instead of watching blood and sewing happening." Chelsea made a quick departure telling Ashley it was nice meeting her and informing Spencer she would see them both in a few days. Ashley heard that and let it slide for the moment.

And that's how the two girls found themselves back at their favorite table, Ashley in her bra, and Spencer inspecting the ripped stitches. Ashley was uneasy, not because of the bleeding, but because she was sitting there half naked while Spencer hovered around.

She had to fight the urge to gasp every time Spencer's fingers lightly stroked her stomach or side. Spencer didn't seem to notice or probably chalked it up to Ashley being in pain, but the brunette knew better.

"Alright Ash, I am going to have to go to the hospital to steal some local anesthetic so I can sew you up."

"Wait, Spencer. I don't want you to get in trouble. I can handle it. You can do it here without all that stuff."

"Ashley are you sure? It will be fairly painful. I don't want to do that to you."

"Yea Spencer. Just give some of those pain pills. Wait- do you have any vodka?"

* * *

About two hours later Spencer found herself finishing another procedure on her IKEA dining table. Her patient was happily sipping from a bottle of vodka; little indicating how drunk the girl truly was other than the fact that the brunette smiled more and a large portion of the alcohol was missing from the bottle.

Ashley, as promised, didn't show signs of major discomfort. It impressed the doctor to no end. Her tolerance for pain was so high; the brunette girl barely flinched while Spencer did the procedure. Now, Spencer simply had to re-bandage the girl and everything would be over.

Ashley knew she was drunk. Not sit in front of a toilet in case you puke drunk, but drunk. She was tough, and while she felt every millimeter of the needle, she tried not to show pain for the sake of her doctor. It helped that Spencer, unknowingly, rubbed gently on Ashley's side with her thumb. It was soothing and very welcome, as much as the spy hated to admit it.

Spencer was surprised how composed the brunette was given how much she drank. Had it been Spencer drinking that much she would probably be on top of the kitchen counter missing a shirt and a lampshade on her head. But given Ashley's years living with secrets, she must know how to hold her tongue and her drink.

"All done Ashley."

Ashley was sitting on the table while Spencer stood in front of her. Spencer was helping put a shirt back on the brunette and fiddling with the hem when she looked up to see Ashley staring right into the blonde's eyes.

Ashley lightly grabbed Spencer's hand that was fiddling with her shirt. "Thank you Spencer." There was an intensity in the brunette's eyes that Spencer had never seen. Spencer could feel the sincerity from the girl in front of her. _Maybe the alcohol affected Ashley more than I thought_.

Spencer whispered out "Anytime Ash." Ashley had flipped over Spencer's hand and was tracing the 341 that branded her skin.

It was quiet in the room, so very quiet. The blonde reached up and brushed hair out of the brunette's face, finally forcing the brunette's eyes back to hers.

"Ashley, please, tell me something about you. Anything; anything real. Please, I just, I need something honest about you and your life."

Spencer was begging. She needed to know, she needed to know that Ashley felt this connection. That Ashley was a person outside of her CIA life. She wanted proof that Ashley was much more than the job. Spencer needed something real from Ashley so that everything she was feeling for the girl could be real too.

But Ashley had turned her head from Spencer, from what Spencer was asking. Spencer could see the storm in the deep brown eyes, but Ashley remained silent, her thumb still softly stroking the inside of her wrist.

Spencer sighed and looked down at her tattoo. "I have seen you stare at it, my tattoo. I know you figured out that it is something important and special, not just some teenage rebellion. It's a sonnet number. Emily Dickinson's '341'." Ashley looked startled at Spencer's words, but Spencer continued regardless.

"I got it right after my mother passed away. She read me that poem one day when she was in the hospital. My mother, she loved poetry. She said it was the way to explain the world, especially for those who cannot put words together themselves. A poem can break a heart, heal a heart, confess love, be funny, be your only friend. They have so much power. I remembered that day. I guess I always will. My mother was always one of my biggest supporters of my writing."

Ashley was staring at Spencer. It was that same look of utter concentration that she had when they first walked together. As if Ashley was detailing everything about the moment they were in and keeping it safe for later. But this time Ashley's eyes were soft, softer than the blonde had ever seen them. Ashley was still rubbing Spencer's wrist when she let out a shaky breath.

" 'After great pain, a formal feeling comes' ." Spencer was shocked as Ashley continued to recite the poem from her memory. The brunette was looking down at their hands. When she had finished with the poem, Spencer knew Ashley wasn't done talking. Spencer didn't push her; she simply waited, watching the girl in front of her find the courage to tell her something real.

"I haven't heard, recited, or talked about that poem since I was 8 years old. My parents were both professors at a university up north. My mother was beautiful. She was a professor of English Literature. She would constantly read poems and stories to me and I loved every moment of it. My father was a mathematics professor. He had the whole mad scientist vibe going, but my parents were so in love.

She would read my father poems about love, about happiness and even though he was terrible at understanding them, he listened so intently. My mother was lovely, she was happy and she kept our family happy.

When I was 8 she died. There was a car accident; a drunk driver had hit her. I read the report years later, but I wished I never had. It is something I wish I could forget everyday. My father was devastated.

I remember he had to write something to put on her tombstone, and he read over and over through all my mother's poetry books and I remember him reading that one out loud, and it seemed so clear to me. How to move on after tragedy, but he never understood the poetry. He finally decided no poem was good enough for her, and wrote a simple inscription."

Ashley took a moment to compose herself and let out another shaky breath before continuing.

"There was a court case set for the guy that had killed my mother. He was a lackey for a huge criminal, so he cut a deal with the government offering information so they could take out his boss. That killed my dad. He totally lost it. He quit his job; he barely spoke, for months and months. Then one day he was just better. He was talking again and everything seemed normal, or as normal as can be with my mother gone.

He never took on a fatherly roll, he sort of became a nice friend I lived with and took care of. My father had no idea how to raise a little girl, so I did it on my own for the most part. I was smart enough.

I didn't really know what he was doing for money until I was around 12. He told me he was working for the government, the CIA, and they needed his help. He was a genius so I easily believed him.

It was around that time he started training me. He taught me things about deception, about fighting, weapons, and all that sort of stuff. He said it was to keep me safe and it was something for us to do together.

When I was around 15, the real CIA busted him. I was taken in. Apparently he had been working for the wrong side. He had lost his faith in the government when they let the guy who killed my mother free, and he was working for the bad guys. I was devastated. Mom would have hated that, and him more than anything. It made me hate him too.

When they first came to get me, I thought they were bad guys. I knocked out two agents before they could finally arrest me. This CIA recruiter realized how much training I had, and given other aspects of my life and personality they offered me training and a position in the CIA rather than going to an orphanage or foster home. I chose the CIA.

I often wonder what my mom would have thought about my decision. I could never imagine her living a life like this or having a daughter that did. She was soft, caring, and loving. She loved white lilies. And she had the best laugh. I use to imagine what my life would have become if she lived. I'm sure this wouldn't be it though. But, I think this, right now, may be my second chance to be the person I was suppose to become."

Ashley finally lifted her eyes to meet Spencer. Spencer was crying and Ashley lifted her hand to wipe the tears from her face. She hadn't talked about her mother to anyone. It was twenty years of silence shattered in 5 minutes. Ashley didn't mind.

Ashley was surprised when the blonde reached up to her face and began to wipe tears. She never realized she was crying. It was just a constant stream of tears that were interrupted by the blonde's thumbs.

"I don't think I can be more honest than that Spencer."

The tearful blonde let out a little laugh and engulfed Ashley into a hug. They stayed like that for some time. Letting everything settle, the tears stop, and tried to weigh the enormity of what had just passed.

It was Ashley who first pulled away. She looked at Spencer with a small smile while she brushed some hair behind her ear. Ashley definitely had sobered up. She saw the look on the blonde's face; it must have been similar to the look on her own face. They needed a minute apart to gather their thoughts.

"I'm going to order us a pizza Spence. Why don't you take a minute to wash up?"

Ashley slowly extracted herself from the blonde, but not without giving a small squeeze to her hand, signifying that everything was okay. Signifying they were here, together, in this moment. And signifying that even though she shouldn't, she feels it all too, it is real for both of them.

* * *

**Thank you for all the reviews! I hope you guys like hearing a little about Ashley's past.**

**Also a quick shout out to omgasmurf, imaferrari, irishgrl33, 2bz2breading, 101lincy, and The Queen for being so great with reviewing! Please keep it up, it really does help. Thanks to everyone that reviews and requests, etc. **


	9. Meg Ryan and Pop Tarts

Chapter 9: Meg Ryan and Pop Tarts

About an hour later the girls found themselves sitting on Spencer's couch eating pizza and watching television. Ashley couldn't remember the last time she watched TV, so it was entertaining, especially getting to hear the little comments Spencer made.

"Everything on here sucks. God, if I have to watch Real Housewives of anywhere else I might shoot myself."

Ashley had to chuckle. She had no idea what Spencer was talking about, but the blonde looked so exasperated towards the subject and the idea of watching the show that Ashley couldn't help but agree with the girl.

Ashley had insisted on paying for the pizza, stating that she did absolutely nothing and wanted to feel like less of a freeloader. Both girls decided to avoid the dining table given the heaviness of their last meeting there, and thought vegging out in front of the TV was a far better option.

This allowed for the girls to lighten the mood. Not that anything was forgotten, or that either girl regretted the conversation that just passed, but they didn't want to go over board with the all the drama. So with beers and pizza they sat, hoping for something good to be on TV.

As Ashley went to grab her third slice of pizza, Spencer let out a little squeal. The brunette looked at the blonde in shock and amusement.

"_When Harry Met Sally _is on, only one of the best romantic comedies ever. This television session is turning around." The blonde seemed beside herself with happiness over the discovery, Ashley barely had the heart to tell her what she was about to say.

"I've never seen it before." Ashley stated, a little sheepishly.

"What? Well, Ashley Davies, prepare to get your socks knocked off. This film is a classic. It is basically the reason Meg Ryan was put on this earth. Watching this movie should be a right of passage for every girl. Meg Ryan and Julia Roberts know how to pull off a romantic comedy like no other. Are you sure you haven't seen it?"

Spencer was slightly shocked when Ashley stated she hadn't seen the movie. Ashley might be the only female she knew, in their age range that didn't know this movie, but then Spencer realized that Ashley must have missed a lot of these normal "rights of passages" growing up the way she did.

"No, based on your description I assume I would remember if I had seen it before."

With that, both girls settled back on the couch to watch the movie with smiles on their faces.

* * *

Ashley slowly opened her eyes. The room was dark except for the glow of the TV. Ashley's side was killing her. She looked down in her lap and saw the blonde's head resting gently on her leg. Ashley had draped a protective arm around the blonde girl, gently grasping one of her hands.

They had fallen asleep sometime after watching the credits roll from _When Harry Met Sally _and the beginning of some sitcom. The television was now playing an infomercial telling Ashley if she bought three mop heads right now, she would instantly get another three.

The brunette wouldn't have minded staying cuddled up to the blonde all night, but she obviously needed to take some pain meds, and she remembered Spencer hasn't gotten a decent night's sleep in a bed for days now.

Ashley needed to get a grip. She did not cuddle. It was simply something she had never done. Given her line of work, and how young she was when she started, normal relationships were never something that she got involved in. She met a girl at a bar, a club, or anything, always went to their place and easily left without spending the night. She never felt remorse because every girl knew what Ashley wanted and didn't want. Ashley didn't have time for misconceptions about relationships with any of the women she slept with. It would all get too messy if any real emotion was involved.

But Spencer was different, and Ashley knew Spencer was different. Ashley needed to remember that she was leaving in two weeks. She couldn't drag Spencer into this kind of life. A life where Ashley would constantly have to look over her shoulder, or hide things from people she loved. It was too much and it was too dangerous. Ashley had to remember that, above everything else, she just wanted the blonde safe.

Ashley looked down at the girl and couldn't help but smile. She gently stroked the girl's hair while softly calling out Spencer's name to wake her up. _Good job at not getting all mushy around the girl Davies._

Spencer's eyes fluttered open and she looked up at Ashley with dark blue eyes.

"We fell asleep," Ashley whispered out, "Let's get changed and go to bed 'kay Spencer?"

Spencer sat up and rubbed her eyes. She was looking forward to getting into bed.

"Sorry for falling asleep on you Ashley. You are pretty comfortable though."

Both girls smiled at the comment and then got up to change and get ready for bed. Spencer used the bathroom in her room, while Ashley used the other bathroom near the living room.

Ashley entered the room and spotted the blonde in cheer shorts and a big shirt. She was fixing the bed for both of them. It was the first time that Ashley felt a twinge of nervousness before going to bed with a female.

Spencer looked up at the brunette. She was wearing a pair of tight short shorts and a wife beater. Spencer had to fight the urge to gulp. Spencer was worried about their sleeping arrangements. She didn't want to make the brunette girl uncomfortable. _Yeah, that is definitely the reason I am worried about sleeping in a bed with Ashley_.

"So you don't mind the left side do you?" Spencer asked, trying to break some of the tension in the room.

"Not at all, that was where I was sleeping before."

And with that both girls climbed into the bed and turned the lights off. They were quiet for a few minutes lost in their own thoughts.

"Hey, Ash. Um, thanks for today. I mean thank you for talking to me."

"I just wanted you to know… I want you to know you aren't the only one feeling it Spence." Ashley replied, stumbling over her words.

Spencer let out a little sigh. It was nice to hear the brunette spy verbalize the connection they shared.

"Hey, Ash?"

"Yes Spencer?"

"Goodnight."

"Goodnight Spence."

Ashley couldn't help but smile and close her eyes. She knew she had to be strong, for Spencer's sake, but in the darkness of the night, Ashley could bask in their shared feelings for one another.

Ashley's smile got even wider when she felt Spencer's hand slowly interlace with hers. It wasn't long before both girls were lulled into a fitful sleep.

* * *

When Spencer woke up the next morning she realized that her hand was still lightly grasping Ashley's. Spencer realized that they had slept facing one another, never letting go of the hands that linked them together. Spencer couldn't help but smile at this thought.

Ashley was beautiful when she slept. Well, Ashley was beautiful at any point of the day, but she had a certain amount of relaxation on her face when she slept. Spencer wouldn't say that she slept as soundly as a baby, but it was definitely the most relaxed that Spencer had ever seen her.

The bruising around Ashley's eye was slowly subsiding, and would soon be completely gone. It was a relief to the blonde because she hated looking at Ashley and having such a physical reminder of someone wanting to kill her. Then again, the brunette's body was littered with past reminders of people trying to kill her. There were a countless amount of scars that covered Ashley's body. It made the blonde's heart ache in sympathy for Ashley.

Spencer was pushing some hair out of Ashley's eyes when she suddenly found herself on her back, with her arms pinned above her head. Ashley was straddling her, her eyes fiercely blazing, and then a look of shock covered her face. Spencer understood that Ashley had done this on accident, and that the brunette was obviously embarrassed, but Spencer's brain couldn't process much more than the fact that Ashley was straddling her.

Ashley had completely forgotten, in her sleeping state, where she was and whom she was with. When she felt something touch her face, instincts kicked in, and that is how she found herself on top Spencer. Ashley immediately let the firm grip on Spencer's wrists go and got off the blonde.

"Spencer, I am so sorry. I guess I forgot. I am so, so sorry. Are you okay?" Ashley was rubbing Spencer's wrists where small red marks had formed from Ashley's grip. The brunette was obviously guilty beyond belief at the thought of hurting the blonde doctor.

The lusty fog finally cleared from Spencer's brain and she looked at the brunette with laughing eyes.

"Ashley, I am fine, I promise. Just a little startled, but I suppose you know the feeling." Spencer smiled at the girl, trying to show her that no damage was done. Ashley looked unconvinced.

Spencer grabbed Ashley's hands, and made the brunette meet her eyes. "Ash, I swear I am okay. You didn't hurt me. I know you would never hurt me."

Ashley sighed in relief, still feeling a little bad, but knowing the blonde wouldn't lie to her. Spencer got out of bed and planted a quick kiss to the top of the brunette's head without thinking. Both girls were blushing furiously from the simple action, but Spencer tried to play it cool.

"I am just going to hop in the shower and stuff." And with that the blonde sauntered into the bathroom leaving a still blushing Ashley in the bed. _Get over it Davies. Stop being such a sap_.

Both girls soon found themselves in the kitchen. The brown-eyed girl watched in amusement as Spencer warmed a Pop Tart using a pan on the stove. Spencer had mumbled out something about the toaster being broken and how cold Pop Tarts should be illegal. The brunette could only smile and sip on her coffee that was far sweeter than she was use to.

When the brunette had entered the kitchen, Spencer declared that Ashley must try coffee with at least one sugar and cream because according to Spencer, Ashley "needed to live a little." The spy couldn't find it in herself to argue with that logic.

Ashley only conceded if Spencer agreed to drink her coffee black. Both girls unwilling to give up on a challenge winced each time they took sips from their respective cups. So far it had been a fairly entertaining morning.

Ashley was feeling good today. Just a slight pain in her side, her headache was nonexistent, which is good considering how bad that concussion could have been, and her face was healing.

The blonde had gotten a call from the hospital earlier in the morning asking if she could please come in for part of the day. Spencer had agreed knowing she couldn't avoid work forever. She also thought it might do both girls good if they got a little space from one another, so they could sort through the craziness of the last few days.

After breakfast, and Spencer switching their coffee halfway through the meal stating that Ashley was "trained to handle torture much better", Spencer left the brunette to go to work. Spencer had asked Ashley if she needed her phone number, but the brunette stated that she already knew it, effectively embarrassing herself and pleasantly shocking the blonde.

When the door to the apartment closed, Ashley knew she had some work to take care of. She slowly moved over to Spencer's computer and started it up, so she could begin to create her new life.

* * *

Spencer got home fairly late. She had gone to the hospital, and didn't realize her small vacation would amount to the amount of work they piled on for her. Spencer then decided she should check into the paper after she was done so she wouldn't be swamped for the weekend.

She had called the brunette twice through out the day. Once in the afternoon to check in on Ashley, inform her she was certain the weirdest/grossest patients waited for her shift, and to ask if she had food for lunch. Ashley had let out a little laugh when Spencer called to check up on her, and assured the blonde girl that she would eat a good lunch.

The second time Spencer called, it was after she had arrived at the paper and realized she had a bit of work there to do as well. She just wanted to inform the brunette that she would be late. Ashley then made a cheeky reply about how the squirrel epidemic that was on the front page of today's paper must be very important, and the paper needed all its best journalists to cover it. Spencer could only laugh.

But now she was finally home. As she walked through the front door, she spotted the brunette girl passed out on the couch. Reading glasses and an E.E. Cummings book were both draped over the girl.

Then Spencer noticed something on her dining table. Her toaster was on it, with a bow and two Pop Tarts waiting to be toasted. Spencer went over to the small appliance and pushed down the lever. To her surprise the toaster worked. There was a small note next to the toaster:

Spencer,

The Pop Tarts are for dessert only. I left you a plate of food in the oven.

-Ashley

Spencer couldn't help the giant smile that made her way on her face. All she could keep thinking was _Ashley fixed my toaster_.

* * *

**Thank you to everyone that has reviewed, and added me to their lists. It means a lot and really helps get these chapters done! A few shout outs:**

Cocoa-pop: Thanks for the love! No, I don't think Ashley has any tatt's, but she has a hell of a lot of scars. I figured that was badass enough :)

Miss Davies: Yea, sad life, but hopefully Spencer can turn it around. Thanks for the review!

2bz2breading: Super-star reviewer! Glad you enjoyed the chapter; I liked this one too.

Anonymous: Thank you for the compliment on my writing! It is my first time writing, so it is nice to hear. Also thanks for the review!

Phy: Thanks for the compliment! That means a lot, and I am glad you are enjoying the story.

Sunshine93lovesSON: I'm assuming that was suppose to be a heart, so thank you, but if it wasn't this is awkward. Lol. Thanks for the review!

Hptriospashley: I am glad you enjoyed Ashley opening up. I am a big reader, and love poetry, so keep an eye out for some more literary references. Thanks for the review!

Paleale: Thank you for your sweet review! I am glad this story made you smile because your comment made me smile. Hope you enjoyed this one.

Elly1212: Glad you love the story! I was hoping this would be different from the norm, thanks for the review!

Imaferrari: Another super-star reviewer! Thanks for always reviewing; I really appreciate it. I really wanted to make Ashley vulnerable in this chapter, and I thought that line would work!

Omgasmurf: Glad you are enjoying the story. Hopefully you like the next few chapters as well!

Irishgrl33: Glad you like the updates! Ashley will be meeting Spencer's family soon, I promise!

Greenwave: Thanks for the review! Hope you like these chapters as much as the rest of the story!

101lincy: Thank you for the long reviews! You are sweet, and I am glad that you like the Ashley and Spencer I have created.


	10. Everything Looks Better With Candles

**Hey everyone! Sorry for the delay in updates, I have run out of pre-written chapters and I am trying to get ahead again. Hope you enjoy this one! Thank you to everyone that reviews, I'll give shout outs for the next chapter!**

Chapter 10: Everything Looks Better With Candles

Days had past and the two girls found themselves in a nice rhythm with one another. Ashley was a bit stir crazy, being somewhat bound to the house, but on a brighter note, Spencer's apartment had never been cleaner.

The two girls never seemed to tire of one another. Ashley and Spencer would have a pleasant breakfast and Spencer would go to work. Ashley then had a lot of time to herself. She cleaned, cooked, and fixed things around the house. Ashley had made most of the arrangements she could to secure herself stability in a post-CIA life.

This was also the most Ashley had read in years; there was a large collection of books for Ashley to choose from. In the afternoon, Ashley often found herself wandering over to the hospital to meet the blonde doctor for lunch. They were simple days filled with light conversations.

The two found themselves chatting about anything. Books mainly, both Spencer and Ashley had a large knowledge of literature. And Ashley's ability to recall specific lines from books never ceased to amaze the blonde. They spoke of politics, food, and all the little things that they loved and hated in life. It was nice. It was normal. Ashley never tired of hearing the blonde ramble on and on about any subject.

The days following Ashley speaking about her mother had allowed for the brunette to seem much more at ease. She was less hesitant talking about her life with the blonde doctor. Things flowed naturally.

Spencer had asked how she remembered a poem she heard 20 years ago and admitted to having a photographic memory. As a doctor, Spencer was truly fascinated with the phenomenon, which lead to a long conversation about Ashley's memory.

Ashley rarely offered information about herself, but she answered any questions that Spencer asked. When questioned, Ashley didn't hold back about the places she had been to and mentioned certain missions she had been on. But Spencer's favorite stories were about Ashley's childhood. It was nice to hear about the things that made the brunette the person she was today, outside her life of espionage.

And Spencer never withheld anything from Ashley either. If Ashley asked a question, the blonde was happy to give a completely honest answer. The brunette asked about her childhood, her mother and the rest of her family. Ashley loved hearing the doctor speak and was eager to learn all she could.

And every night the girls would fall asleep on their respective sides of the bed, only to wake up tangled in one another. Ashley, after that initial morning, made herself aware that she shared a bed with Spencer. There was no repeat incident of Ashley straddling the blonde (despite the blonde not minding in the slightest), but Spencer usually could tell when the brunette was waking up. Spencer could feel Ashley tense at feeling any contact, and then relax, remembering where she was and whom she was with. Spencer liked the safety she felt being wrapped in Ashley's arms and not just because the brunette had been trained to kill.

Neither girl spoke of their nightly cuddling, but it never went much further than that. Everything seemed almost unconscious on both parts. The girls flirted, touched, and gazed without even knowing that they were doing it. It seemed like their natural state when the two were together. It was maddening to say the least.

Spencer loved this. Her only complaint was that they seemed to be stuck in the same spot. She knew she shouldn't. She knew a relationship between herself and a supposedly dead CIA agent with huge trust issues was Jerry Springer waiting to happen, but she couldn't help it. When she looked into Ashley's eyes she felt so much. She enjoyed spending time with the girl, and Spencer had to fight the urge to gush about Ashley to anyone with two ears. But Spencer knew Ashley was holding back. The brunette girl seemed to be stronger than Spencer in more ways than one.

Despite Spencer's beliefs, the brunette's will was actually crumbling with every passing moment. It was harder and harder to try and keep some sort of distance between themselves. Ashley felt like a magnet constantly being dragged towards Spencer. Ashley enjoyed all their conversations; she could talk to the blue-eyed girl for days on end without ever feeling bored. And as much as she hated admitting it, she loved how their bodies found one another night after night. But she also knew that she was leaving in a little less than a week. She refused to put Spencer in any more danger, and if they crossed any clear line, Ashley didn't know if she had the strength to turn back.

Ashley was healing more and more everyday. She rarely felt pain in her side or her head, and the bruising on her face and ribs was significantly better, if not gone. Her body knew how to heal quickly after all these years working in her line. Spencer could take the stitches out in a few more days. This relieved and saddened both girls, knowing that their time together was dwindling.

But Ashley wasn't thinking about her departure at the moment. She had just shared a lunch of peanut butter and jelly and two juice boxes with the blonde doctor and was heading towards the grocery store to plan for tonight's surprise. Ashley wanted to thank Spencer in some way for everything she has done, so she decided to surprise the girl tonight when she got home from work.

* * *

Spencer had a hard day. She was glad to just go home and relax. Knowing that Ashley was there was just as comforting. Luckily, today was Friday and she had the entire weekend off. It had been a strange last few days, and it was only now that it seemed that things were getting back to normal, or as normal as things could be with a beautiful ex-CIA agent living in your house.

As the blonde walked through the door, she was surprised with the candles and soft lighting decorating her entire apartment. As she went further into her home she noticed lilies placed on the table and light music playing somewhere. She finally spotted the brunette looking nervous and shy in the kitchen.

"Hey Spence. Um, I just wanted to thank you, for everything. So I thought I'd make us a nice dinner and we can watch some movies. I got ones you said that I just _needed _to see. I assumed you like them."

Spencer looked at the dining table and next to the flowers were a few movies, _Casablanca, Kill Bill vol. 1, _and _The Fantastic Mr. Fox_. Granted _Kill Bill_ wasn't the most romantic, but the blonde assumed that the CIA agent would find it fairly entertaining.

"Now, before you say anything, I know you must be tired, so go ahead and take a shower and change. We still have a little time before dinner is ready."

The blonde could only smile and blush. Ashley had turned around and started attending to the various pots and pans on the stove, so Spencer went and showered and changed. Trying to hurry because she could smell the wonderful dinner Ashley had prepared.

When she emerged from her room, the blonde found Ashley seated at the table with two plates waiting. Ashley quickly scrambled to her feet when the blonde headed towards the table. Ashley hated to admit to herself that she was nervous as hell.

"Ash. Wow, this all looks so amazing. I really don't know how to thank you."

"Don't worry about it Spencer, it is the least I could do after everything."

The two girls sat down. Spencer was shocked to see the meal in front of her. It looked like it was out of a five star restaurant. Sure, Ashley had been cooking all week, but it was far less fancy than what was in front of Spencer now. Spencer looked up at the brunette. She looked beautiful in the soft glow of all the candles.

"Did the CIA teach you to cook like this?" Spencer joked as she took her first bite, groaning at how good the food was.

Ashley smiled when she heard that reaction from Spencer. "Actually, they sort of did. There was this mission in France and part of my cover was a chef. I got a little training, and the rest I picked up along the way."

Spencer couldn't help but laugh. Who knew working for the government would train a person in so many different aspects of life? It seemed as if there was nothing Ashley couldn't do. It was fairly intimidating, but Spencer didn't mind. The brunette was so humble about it all.

The two chatted happily about the rest of their days. Spencer detailing the excruciating mother that refused to believe her 5-year-old son simply had a cold, and Ashley poking fun at how small the local grocery store was.

"I noticed that you fixed the shower head today. Thanks for fixing all that stuff around the house." The blonde was grateful, her brothers and father meant well, but were terrible when it came to anything handy, and Spencer could never find the time to hire someone to fix the small things around her place.

"It was nothing really. To be honest, I am not really sure what to do with all this new found time, especially considering how much better I am feeling." It was true, the better the brunette felt, the more useless she felt staying in Spencer's home. The least she could do was attack all the household problems she encountered.

"Is knowing how to fix all this stuff CIA training too? I couldn't picture them spending a lot of time on toaster fixing."

"Actually, that one is kind of me. Ever since I was little I loved taking things apart and putting them back together. My father was pretty good at it, but I think I got better than him in my teenage years. I liked it, how everything made sense. There was a reason for every piece. I always thought that when I went to college I would major in engineering, well at least one of my majors would have been engineering."

"You never went to college?" Spencer was shocked; Ashley was certainly one of the smartest, most worldly people she has ever spoken with. She never considered what Ashley's education was. "I suppose I just assumed you did."

"I never technically finished high school. I was recruited to the CIA at 15, which meant they began training me fairly immediately. I received education, much farther than high school, but I never officially graduated since it would be unnecessary given that I was working for them already."

"But you never got that experience? That sucks Ashley! Suffering through learning a language, or going to terrible dances, and going to your first frat party! I guess I will never fully understand everything you gave up."

"It didn't seem to matter, at the time, that I was missing all that stuff. It wasn't like my home life was very normal anyways. And I did learn a language, well 13 to be exact, but it wasn't in a high school, it was more for life and death situations, but the frat party, that was definitely not covered in training."

Ashley gave Spencer a lopsided smile, and the blonde could only smile back. Spencer was astounded with Ashley's attitude; she never seemed to look back and regret any of the decisions she made. She only saw the logic and focused on the next step in her life. It was a quality Spencer envied.

"Jesus Ashley, 13 languages?"

"Yea, well, with the photographic memory, it makes it fairly easy to pick up that kind of stuff."

"Do me a favor and tell me one thing about you that isn't completely intimidating."

The brunette was slightly at a loss. She never realized that she was being intimidating, and while she could tell the blonde was merely joking, she could also sense how impressed Spencer was with her. It made her feel good. Ashley rarely looked back and realized everything she could do, she merely did them to stay alive.

"Um, well, I once proposed to the Cinderella at Disneyland when I was six. I offered her a ring pop while I was on one knee and everything. I don't think I ever saw my mom laugh harder."

And Spencer was peeling with laughter. The brunette was slightly blushing and chuckling along with the gasping blonde. Ashley had made out a couple of "That's so cute" 's through all the laughter and it made the story worth the slight embarrassment she felt now.

The dishes had long been cleared and both girls were still at the table chatting. Ashley couldn't help but notice the softness in Spencer's eyes. She knew the blonde was in a constant state of shock in Ashley's upbringing, but she never sensed pity from the girl, only sympathy. It was oddly comforting.

Ashley hadn't realized how beautiful the blonde would look surrounded in the soft candlelight. It made things so much more difficult when she was constantly distracted by the soft glow radiating off of the blonde, but she was glad Spencer enjoyed her surprise.

"Ashley I still haven't asked you, what are you going to do now? What is your plan? I am worried about what happens to you now."

Ashley was a little surprised at the blonde. It seemed like it was the first time Spencer acknowledged the danger that surrounded the situation. Unfortunately, the blonde didn't seem concerned for herself, but only for Ashley.

"Don't worry Spence, I will be alright."

"Don't do that Ashley, don't get all vague and expect me to live with that answer. Please tell me."

Ashley sighed, she didn't want to give Spencer more details, the more she knew about Ashley's future, the more at risk Spencer could be in the future. The last thing Ashley wanted was Spencer to get hurt.

"One of the most important things that I learned, not only from the CIA, but from my father is never to trust the situation you are in. These things aren't permanent, and from the moment I started with the CIA I have been planning for a situation in which I would need to run."

"So what, you are changing your name? Leaving the country? Changing your appearance?"

"Not exactly, that is the great thing about America. There are approximately 130,000 Ashley's living in the United States today, and 42,385 of those are Ashley Davies' around my age. I have created a situation in which I have another life as an Ashley Davies. This other Ashley is a high school and college graduate, originally from Nebraska, and moved to California for school. I have a California id, registered to vote, I even have a second apartment in Los Angeles for this girl.

My identification that the CIA has is me, but I may have altered certain facts, scars, even my fingerprints and eye scan. I am more this other Ashley than I am the CIA one, well other than the fake life and such. I have been altering that information little by little for years now, so no one would notice it.

I even have a fairly large amount of money stored away under the name Ashley Davies and a few other aliases. I made it a point to look like I spent a lot of money on a lot of dumb things, so the CIA wouldn't question where all my money went. I probably make the best knock of shoes and purses in the country.

Anyways, I kept this id and a few others the CIA doesn't know about with me at all times. You didn't find them because they were in the heel of my boots. I told you Spence, I have been working in the spy world for a long time."

"Ash, that is kind of incredible. So there is no way they can identify you as the CIA Ashley rather than the other Ashley?"

"Well I am sure they can make that conclusion, but given time, and how much I have slowly altered my file for the CIA, it will be difficult to make that conclusion. But people that knew me, they are the ones I need to worry about. But this other Ashley Davies has a complete life and background. I ensured that."

Spencer was often surprised with how much of the job was truly embedded in the brunette, but this was fairly shocking. She had no idea how much time and planning this kind of alternate life would have needed. And it was definitely something that the blonde would never be able to think of herself.

Ashley could tell that Spencer was getting fairly lost in thought. As much as Ashley wanted the young doctor to realize that this is the kind of life Ashley chose, she was often worried that the blonde had a certain breaking point and would start running for the hills. So Ashley did what she always did, tried to diffuse the situation.

"Thank goodness for my parents' lack of originality in naming me, huh?" Ashley small comment was rewarded with a small chuckle from the blonde, effectively shaking her out of her thoughts.

But the blonde wasn't distracted for long. "So does that mean you are going back to Los Angeles to live?"

Ashley sighed again; she knew she shouldn't be answering these questions. "Well no. I need to go to Los Angeles though, soon. Probably once this week is over." Both girls winced at the reminder that Ashley would be leaving soon, but the brunette continued.

"I need to break into my old place, the one the CIA knows about, and see what they have gotten. They have gone into my place, reported my death, but they still haven't completely packed my apartment. It seems they haven't taken much, and I know there are certain things they haven't found, and I would like to keep it that way.

I also need to go to my other place in Los Angeles and clean it out, and make a scene of moving out, to keep the cover going. But after all that, I am free to settle wherever I want. Maybe I will head north, Seattle or something. My options are fairly open, but I need to get to Los Angeles first."

The blonde only nodded. She was relieved to hear that the brunette had such a well thought out plan. It would be an understatement to say she was a little worried about what Ashley would do once their time together was over.

"Well, I would offer you my car, but I have yet to have it repaired."

Ashley could only laugh. _Spencer and her car_. As far as the brunette knew, Spencer constantly spoke of the car and how she wished it was repaired, but she never did anything further than that. Ashley hadn't even seen the car yet.

"Spence, why don't you just buy a new car? It seems like you are never going to get this one fixed."

"Well, it was a gift. It was my mother's car. I have always loved it. It is an old mustang that her dad had given her. My mom gave it to me when I was going to college. I was the one that loved the car the most. When I was at UCLA there was a place that specialized in fixing old cars like that one. It broke down a little over a year ago when I was living here, and the local mechanic can't really be trusted with anything, let alone my baby, so it has just been sitting in the garage.

I know I complain, but it is so small here that I can walk everywhere. I would have no idea how to go about trying to replace that car. It just has never been an option."

Spencer was smiling. Ashley could tell whenever the blonde spoke of her mother, she missed her, but Spencer was fond of talking about her. She was at peace with her mother's death, and it was nice to see someone fondly reminiscing about a deceased loved one. Ashley could only smile back at the girl.

"Anyways. Why don't we start on one of these movies Ash? I think I can only stay awake for one at most."

The girls made their way over to the couch and settled in, deciding on _Casablanca_. Ashley was sitting rigidly straight, like usual, and Spencer didn't care about keeping her distance tonight. The way Ashley looked surrounded in the soft glow of the candles and the delicious meal she had prepared was all too much to not indulge a little bit.

So Spencer scooted closer to the girl, curling into Ashley's side. Spencer's head resting on her shoulder with an arm wrapped around the girl's waist. Ashley looked down at Spencer, she knew she should move, shouldn't allow this, but all Ashley did was pull a blanket off the back of the couch and cover them both.

Spencer fell asleep listening to Humphrey Bogart and Ashley's steady heartbeat, wrapped up in an old blanket, and more importantly, Ashley's arms.


	11. Poker Face

Chapter 11: Poker Face

The two girls had, predictably, fallen asleep sometime during the movie. When Ashley woke up, at an ungodly hour for a Saturday morning, she found that both girls were lying down on the couch, spooning. It was a situation that completely threw Ashley off despite being in a million different life-threatening ordeals.

Ashley constantly found herself tangled in Spencer over the last few nights, but this was intimate. There was no room between the two of them, and rather than wanting to jump up and run, Ashley had this giant urge to burry her face deeper into Spencer's neck and stay like that for many more hours.

Upon realizing that, Ashley decided the best plan would be to get some distance.

Ashley was showered, dressed and heading to the market just after the sun had risen. A nice walk and some grocery shopping would give the girl plenty of time to clear her head.

* * *

Spencer woke up to the smell of frying bacon. It was a nice thing to wake up to, although she wouldn't have minded waking up next to the Ashley. It had been a good evening, but she was glad to be back in the sobering daylight.

Spencer understood Ashley's hesitation for moving forward. Hell, Spencer herself, was worried with how things were going, this was not a normal relationship to just run into, but she couldn't seem to help herself when it came to the brunette.

Spencer hadn't even sat up when she heard Ashley call out, "Good morning sleepy head! Why don't you go wash up? Breakfast is almost ready."

Ashley laughed when she vaguely heard Spencer mumble, "Creepy spy, with her creepy spy hearing" while heading into her bedroom. The time away from Spencer had allowed the brunette to get her head on straight, and plus, she had a strange encounter in the grocery store that only Spencer could clear up. Curiosity trumped need for distance in this instance.

Spencer emerged just as Ashley was putting down Spencer's coffee cup. The two girls settled to eat, and Ashley allowed for a few minutes to pass before she started looking for some answers.

"So, Spencer, I was at the grocery store this morning, and you will never guess who I ran into! Chelsea, of all people."

Spencer's eyes shot up to Ashley. Ashley could read Spencer's face like a book, _busted_.

"You don't say! How is Chelsea?" Spencer said, trying to play it cool.

Ashley smirked; she loved when they played dumb. It was more fun getting information when they didn't admit to their crimes right away.

"Well she is good. She said an odd thing when we were leaving though, she said, 'Well, see you later today Spencer's Ashley!'"

_Shit, I can't get out of this one, better come clean now_. "I was going to tell you Ashley, I swear. But I was waiting for a better time, like, when we were on our way there..."

Spencer was entering full ramble mode and Ashley knew she needed to cut her off so she could hear where they were going this afternoon. "Spencer, where exactly are we going?"

"Um, to my dad's house? We try and have a weekly BBQ and its today, and Chelsea told him about you, and he decided that you had to come. I didn't know how to break it to you. But it will be fine, you'll see…"

Ashley paled as the blonde rambled on. _I have to meet her dad and brothers? _She wasn't ready for this. Ashley hated to admit how nervous this made her.

Spencer could see it all over Ashley's face, she was nervous as hell. And while the blonde was fully sympathetic, she also thought it was the cutest thing in the world to see Ashley worried over this situation. Spencer had to fight the urge to pinch the girl's cheek.

Spencer placed a comforting hand over Ashley's. "Ash, don't worry, they are going to love you. And plus we already have a cover story, I'll admit, not the best cover story, but it will all work. Don't worry, it's not like it matters anyways."

Both girls hated how that sounded; both girls also knew how untrue it was. It mattered to brunette whether Spencer's family liked her, and the blonde really wanted her family to meet this wonderful woman that she was spending time with, but neither admitted it to the other.

Ashley replied with a half-hearted "Yea". Spencer beamed at the girl.

"Don't worry Ash, this is going to be a lot of fun!"

* * *

Ashley was all jittery and nervous as the pair approached Spencer's childhood home. She wasn't ready for this. Ashley never met parents, or families, or anything. Hell, she hadn't been around a normal family in 20 years.

All she could keep reminding herself was that spies don't get nervous. _Sack up Davies, you can handle this. You have charmed much scarier people_.

Spencer, while she felt bad for the brunette, loved every second of her nervous, awkward, hesitation. It made Ashley seem so normal and human, so Spencer was grateful. It also didn't hurt that the brunette had never been cuter.

Ashley looked like there was an ambush waiting for her on the other side of the door. _Yea right, I am sure she would be much calmer at that prospect than what she is about to do_. Spencer couldn't help at giggle at her own musings and was met with a sharp look from the jumpy brunette.

"Spence, come on. This is not funny. You have to admit this is really freaking weird."

Spencer had to smile at the girl, it was by far, one of the weirder things that she has had to do, but the more time Spencer spent with the brunette, the more Spencer realized that this all seemed strangely right.

"Don't worry Ash. I know it is weird, but it will be fine. My family will love you because you are great. It will be good to see you a little out of your element too." Spencer smirked at her last comment, while Ashley just gave her a half-hearted grin.

"Come on." And with that the blonde pushed open the front door, but not before lacing her fingers with Ashley. The two girls walked down the hall that was lined with family photos. Ashley made a mental note to come back and inspect them more closely as they made their way to the backyard.

"Hey honey! Glad you finally got here!" A tall, dark haired man shouted out as the two girls stepped onto the back porch. He left his station at the BBQ and embraced Spencer in a big hug.

Ashley couldn't help but notice how similar his kind eyes were to Spencer's. She also couldn't help but notice that the blonde was still holding her hand despite the death grip the older man had on her. Finally they pulled away and Spencer turned towards the fidgeting girl behind her.

"Dad, this is my friend Ashley."

Spencer's father smiled at his daughter, he also took a second to glance down at their joined hands, and then offer his hand to Ashley.

"Ashley, it is so nice to meet you. My daughter has said so much about you over the phone in the last few days. I am glad that your recovery is going well."

Ashley was a little shocked at the older man's admission of Spencer talking about her, and Spencer was turning a new shade of pink that the brunette had never seen before, but happily took Spencer's father's hand.

"It is nice to meet you too Mr. Carlin. Thank you for inviting me to the BBQ. I am lucky to have met such a nice girl like Spencer."

"Please, call me Arthur. And if you excuse me, I smell burning food, Glen's inability to stay still for 30 seconds may lead to a disaster for dinner."

Arthur immediately liked the girl he just met. He liked that she was polite, he liked her look, and he really liked that the girl before him seemed nervous as hell to met him. That was always a good quality for someone to have that has an obvious interest in his baby girl.

"Dufus!"

"Jackass!"

"Ouch Spence, that one hurt. And in front of a beautiful stranger too!" A young, goofy looking blonde man had run over to meet the two girls. It was safe to assume this was the dumb, but loveable older brother Glen.

"Hey there Sexy. I'm Glen." He went to grab Ashley's hand to kiss it, but Ashley's instincts kicked in and she easily dodged the advance, moving out of the way while tripping the blonde man, and effectively making him land on his ass.

Ashley was slightly embarrassed at her natural instincts, but also relieved that her intentions were made obviously clear. _You can take the girl out of the spy game, but I guess you really can't take the spy out of the girl_ Ashley couldn't help but think.

Ashley could hear the blonde girl chuckling next to her, and shrieking laughter coming from further in the backyard. Chelsea was standing bent over, laughing ridiculously loud.

Arthur had also seen the scene and decided that it only reaffirmed his initial liking to the girl. He loved his son, but any girl to fall for that is someone he doesn't want around.

Ashley went to help Glen up. "I am sorry about that. It was kind of my first reaction. I'm Ashley, by the way."

Glen looked at the girl and gave a lighthearted smile. "Don't worry about it. Beautiful women that are feisty make me weak in the knees."

This line only caused Chelsea to howl out in laughter all over again, and Spencer to let out a loud groan.

"Alright Glen, hit the brakes. Let's get this over with." Spencer turned towards Ashley and asked, "Ashley are you at all attracted to my brother Glen?"

Ashley gave the blonde boy a sympathetic smile while shaking her head no.

"See Glen, now leave the poor girl alone."

"It's okay Ashley, we can still be friends. Plus, if I am going to lose a beautiful woman, I don't mind if I am losing her to Spencer here." Glen said, finally noticing the still linked hands between the two girls.

The girls noticed all the glances and dropped one another's hand.

Desperately trying to change the subject Spencer asked, "Hey, where's Clay?"

"Couldn't make it tonight, he got tied up with a case. You know how he is honey, never one to let it go. He gets so wrapped up in it." Arthur replied, saving both girls from the Glen's little comment.

Ashley and Spence both heard Chelsea mumble out, "You can say that again." Spencer just gave Chelsea a soft look while Ashley looked at Chelsea in confusion.

The two girls had made it over to the girl, each giving her a hug and a smile while they sat near her.

"Alright gang, food's ready!" Arthur announced as everyone got settled at the picnic table outside.

* * *

It had been an entertaining dinner. Ashley constantly felt out of place in the middle of this obviously close-knit group, but never once felt unwelcome. Arthur was just as Spencer described him, kind, respectful, and obviously over the moon about his three children.

Ashley found Glen amusing. She could see the obvious mortification on Spencer's face every time he made a lame attempt to hit on her, or was crude in some way. Ashley never saw herself going to the opera with Glen, but he did seem like the kind of guy she wouldn't mind drinking a beer with. He was harmless.

Chelsea, despite not being an actual Carlin child, fit in amazingly well. As if the Carlin's wouldn't be complete without her and vice versa. It was funny and strange, but it was nice to see how easily this family could open up to others.

Ashley did notice the one-sided hatred Chelsea had towards Clay. The young artist often referred to him as "egg-head" with a small scowl on her face while the rest of the family easily ignored her negative attitude towards the subject.

And Spencer. Spencer seemed happier than Ashley had ever seen her. She was glowing; while Ashley's logical side told her it was because she was with her family, she had a distinct feeling that it was also in large part due to her own presence at the gathering.

Much to Ashley's relief the blonde stuck close by her, and often shot her quick glances, shy smiles, and kind eyes. As if they were sharing their own moments outside of the moments that were being created during the family BBQ.

Ashley had offered little information about herself. She told the family that she worked in computers and the topic was easily taken off course when Glen jokingly coughed out "nerd". It was a relief to Ashley because she didn't like lying to Arthur; he seemed like such a good guy.

She also told them she was between jobs and lived in Los Angeles. Spencer was helpful in keeping conversation away from Ashley's past. It was nice having an accomplice.

After the food was cleared everyone gathered in the dining table for their "ritual" game of poker. This meant trouble for everyone except Ashley. Spencer sat out of the game, as she usually did, leaving Arthur, Glen, Chelsea, and Ashley to play.

It only took Ashley 15 minutes to win all of Glen's chips. He left the table grumbling about being distracted by hotness. Ashley didn't win every hand, but she was definitely winning.

Ashley knew that Glen stuffed his face when he was lying, his tell being very obvious. Chelsea did this cute, not going to look at anyone when she had a good hand, and got a small wrinkle between her eyes when she lied. And Arthur would get this look in his eyes, like he was excited that he was allowed to lie. Granted the three other players were up against a spy, trained to read these kinds of things, with an amazing memory and high math IQ. Ashley was tough to beat.

Ashley had both Chelsea and Arthur on the run, and Glen, after given another set of chips, on the run as well. The next hand had been dealt, when Spencer hollered from the kitchen that her father's cake was ready to come out. With that Arthur excused himself to take care of the baked goods and asked Spencer to fill in.

Spencer was sitting across from Ashley and couldn't help but give the girl a big smile. The stakes were getting higher. Ashley had a pretty bad hand she was trying to bluff out of; Glen had folded, and Chelsea had folded as well. Ashley knew they would. But Spencer was left.

No one else had been able to tell when Ashley was bluffing, after the first few hands it was obvious that no one knew when she lied.

Ashley wasn't sure what Spencer's hand was. She didn't think it was that great because the blonde held her cards a little too close to her chest, and her reaction when she saw her cards was next to nothing, but Spencer's eyes were boring into Ashley's.

There was a certain level of confidence that Spencer had that made Ashley unsure, not only about the hand, but also about anything she may ever disagree with Spencer about. It was unnerving to the brunette; unnerving, but sexy as hell.

The blonde finally broke the intense staring, "You are lying. I know you are lying." And with that Spencer called and placed her cards on the table.

Ashley was shocked. No one had ever been able to tell when she was telling a lie, not by simply looking at her face. She had fooled con artists, ever passed lie detector tests, so this was easily a first.

Ashley let out a little sigh and a small smile and revealed her cards, showing that Spencer had won the hand, and that Ashley was in fact lying. Both Glen and Chelsea let out a yell of congratulations to Spencer for finally having someone knock the supposed "card shark". But Spencer's eyes never left Ashley's during the celebration.

* * *

After about another hour and a half, the two girls found themselves at the front door saying goodbye to Arthur.

"Thank you for everything Dad. It was great as usual. I will give you a call later in the week." Spencer said as she embraced her father.

Arthur pulled back from the hug. "You know I loved having you Honey. Don't worry about calling me, but you really do need to take Ashley here out on the town before she has to head back to Los Angeles. I can't believe you haven't already given her the famous Carlin tour." Arthur said with a laugh and a quick wink towards Ashley.

"I will Dad. You know she needed some time to heal and all that."

"Well good, Honey. And Ashley," he said quickly turning to the brunette girl, "It was a pleasure meeting you, and I hope to see you again soon." And then he pulled Ashley into a rather large hug.

Spencer almost laughed at the shock on Ashley's face and the awkward hug the brunette girl returned.

"Thank you Arthur. These past few days have been some of the best I have had in the longest time." Ashley informed the tall man with a huge smile.

And with that the two girls began their walk back to Spencer's apartment. They strolled along at a leisurely pace, enjoying the crisp fall weather and the presence of one another. Finally, the brunette broke the silence.

"Well, that wasn't as bad as I thought it would be." Ashley said with a small smile, glancing towards the blonde. "But what's the deal with Chelsea and Clay?"

Spencer let out a slight laugh, "Chelsea has had a crush on Clay forever, and Clay is completely obvious. I think it has taken its toll on Chelsea. Clay never takes any of us seriously when we mention anything to him. He just gets so wrapped up in whatever he does, school, a case. So poor Chelsea deals with it in strange ways. Today she was trying out hating him."

Ashley only nodded in response. The two girls enjoyed the silence they found themselves in; it was nice.

"My dad really likes you." Spencer informed the spy with a small bumping of their shoulders. Spencer was happy her family met Ashley. It just meant that when she left, there would be someone that knew that Ashley had been a part of her life.

Spencer also wanted to share her family with Ashley, if only for an afternoon. They had gotten so close in the last few days that it only seemed right that Ashley would get to know such a huge part of Spencer's world.

"I'm glad he likes me. I like him too. You are so much like him. I even like Glen. He is a terrible poker player though."

Spencer, again, found herself laughing. It was true. Glen never seemed to win at the ritual games of poker.

Something had been nagging Ashley since Spencer beat her at that hand of poker, "Hey Spence, how did you know I was lying?"

Spencer looked at the brunette and could see the obvious curiosity. Spencer was glad she won that hand; it proved how well she had gotten to know the brunette in the short time they had spent together. Some time passed before Spencer decided to answer Ashley, trying to find the right way to explain how she knew Ashley was bluffing.

"It was your eyes. It isn't something that I can exactly pinpoint, but your eyes got, uh, dimmer, is the only word I can think to explain it. They just seemed lifeless, like you hated the idea of lying to me. I don't know, I guess I could just tell."

"Well, looks like you are better trained than any CIA officers I have met."

"Naw, you are just interesting to study." Spencer replied without thinking, her face instantly turning red when the words fell from her mouth. Ashley had a big grin on her face, and was fighting off her own blush.

The girls left the conversation at that, neither wanting to erase the feeling that they felt from Spencer's admission. But as they continued their walk home both girls found themselves walking closer and closer together, with their hands constantly brushing and shy smiles on their faces.

* * *

**Hope you guys enjoyed that one! Reviews are much appreciated!**

**Irishgrl33: Thanks! I like they are cute too!  
****2bz2breading**: I am glad you liked that chapter, the coming chapter is one of my favorites, I think you'll like it too.  
**sonfan110: I am glad you found the story, sadly the title is not mine, its a song by Stars. Thanks for the review!  
****imaferrari: Glad you liked the chapter! I was worried people would get annoyed with the angst, but I am glad you like it! Thanks for always reviewing! ps. meg and julia ARE the romcom queens! you are too sweet.  
****n: If that is driving you nuts, the next few chapters will make u go crazy. Thanks for the review!  
****hptriospashley**: Thank you so much, glad that still you like the story!  
**sunshine93lovesson:Thanks for the review, I am glad you think they are cute! ps. 3  
****greenwave**: Glad you are addicted to the story, I enjoy writing it. Thanks for the review!  
**.dreams**: You are so sweet, way to make a girl blush. Glad you like the story, and thanks for the review!  
**101lincy**: I hope you liked Chelsea in this one too. She is a fun character to write, and if badass CIA ashley was a person I am sure she would hug you too. Thanks for always reviewing!  
: She did! She did! Everyone needs a working toaster oven ;)  
Miss Davies: Don't worry, Ashley is keeping an eye on the CIA, and I'm glad you are enjoying the progression of their relationship! Thanks for the review!  
**omgasmurf**: I agree, Cummings and Ashley are two things that I love and together, oh man. Thanks for the review!  
**adibou: Thank you for the review! You are so nice, hope you enjoyed this one!  
****Elly**: Glad you like these two. I wanted to take it slow in the story since two weeks in real life is so short, I really wanted to build up their connection. Thanks for the review!  



	12. The Famous Carlin Tour

**Thank you for all the reviews/adds! You guys will probably hate me for the next few chapters because of all the angst, but bear with me, it will totally be worth it. Please leave me your thoughts!**

Chapter 12: The Famous Carlin Tour

Spencer had woken up before Ashley today; she had big plans for both of them, and her excitement got the best of her. Upon Spencer waking up, she found herself on top of Ashley, her head on Ashley's chest, with Ashley's arms loosely encircling her. It was a nice way to wake up.

Spencer was now looking up at the girl, she needed to wake her up, but wanted to do it in a way that wouldn't startle the spy. The guilt that flashed through Ashley's eyes every time her spy instincts kicked in was too heartbreaking to see on a morning as nice as this.

Spencer slowly brought her hand up to cup Ashley's face, her thumb slowly stroking the girl's cheek. Almost instantly Ashley's hand shot towards her own, but stopped before a death grip was on Spencer's wrist. Spencer could swear she could see Ashley's brain processing where she was and whom she was with. Instead, Ashley's hand made its way to Spencer's and lightly grasped it, her thumb slowly stroking Spencer's own hand. A small smile worked its way onto Ashley's face while her eyes fluttered open.

Ashley let out a raspy "Hi" which the blonde easily returned. The two found themselves in these situations time and time again. It took everything in Spencer to not pounce on the girl, but she knew Ashley's hesitation, and she was well aware of her own. In order to ensure that Spencer's mouth wouldn't attack Ashley, the blonde rolled out of bed. _I could totally be a spy with these moves_ Spencer couldn't help but think.

"Wake up Ashley! I have big plans for us today! So get dressed, casually. It is about time I gave you a tour of my wonderful town."

"Spencer, you are going to give a tour of a town that could fit inside a grocery store in Los Angeles? I think I have it all pretty much mapped out."

"Hey! It is not that small! Plus, you haven't seen the town through my eyes. I have the inside scoop on everything, I do work for the newspaper and all."

Ashley could only chuckle and appease the blonde. She didn't really care what they did; she just wanted to spend time with the doctor. So both girls got ready for their day out.

* * *

Ashley hated this. It was certainly unnatural, and decidedly dumb. Why people even decided to partake in this particular activity, Ashley would never figure out. It also drove her crazy how amused her blonde partner in crime was.

"Bowling sucks. Let's go home." Ashley huffed out while plopping into the seat next to the blonde and crossing her arms like a petulant child. Spencer only laughed while she sauntered up to grab her ball.

"It only sucks because I am kicking your ass." The blonde retorted with a sly grin and an extra swing in her step. Ashley had had enough of the blonde's ever expanding ego, and just as Spencer was about to release the ball (which would probably result in another damn strike) Ashley gently threw her shoe at the doctor's butt causing a gutter ball.

The blonde turned around with shock/horror/amusement written all over her face. Ashley was trying her best to look down innocently at their score sheet.

"Damn Ashley, I didn't know that you were so bad at bowling that you could cause a gutter ball when it is not even your turn." Spencer offered with a cheeky smile.

"Oh, its on now Carlin." Ashley growled out while running towards the blonde.

After a little bit of maneuvering Spencer was thrown over Ashley's shoulder being spun around in circles. Both girls were laughing hysterically.

When a high school student donning the title of manager on his bowling vest asked both girls if they could please leave, they both stopped, mid-spin, and burst into another round of laughter.

Eventually, the girls were escorted out of the bowling alley, still laughing uncontrollably. It was easy to ignore the throbbing near Ashley's stitches because of the endless laughter coming from the two.

It had been a great day so far. Spencer, true to her word, had given Ashley a very in depth, and personalized tour of the small town. Ashley was taken to the spot where Spencer lost her first tooth after falling from her bike in the park, and to the infamous spot where Chelsea and Spencer met.

They toured the elementary school, middle school, and high school that Spencer had attended. Spencer showed Ashley the tree where she had her first kiss (Jason West) and the gym bleachers where she had her other first kiss (Jessie Keith).

They had gone to lunch at the diner that served the best milkshakes, mediocre food, and employed the oldest woman in the world (or what appeared to be the oldest woman in the world).

Spencer gave her a quick tour of the hospital she worked in, and another quick tour of the newspaper office. Spencer even showed Ashley the new bench that the newspaper would be printing an article about in tomorrow's paper. Ashley only laughed for 3 solid minutes after Spencer revealed that inside scoop.

And now the girls were banned from the bowling alley for the evening. Granted it was somewhat pathetic to watch Ashley try so hard and fail at getting any better.

"I think you planned that so you wouldn't have to finish out the rest of our game because I was beating you so badly." Spencer finally got out. The girls' laughter had died down and both were sitting on the curb outside the entrance to the bowling alley trying to collect themselves again. "And you got us kicked out before I even had a chance to try and win that duck in the claw machine!" Spencer added, nudging the brunette girl playfully.

"I don't understand that damn game. I am a math genius, I understand the angels, the velocity, the speed, everything in how to throw the ball and what not, but it just doesn't work. I think you rigged it." Ashley let out in a huff. She wasn't use to being bad at things. She knew it was silly, but the entire day seemed to have been full of silliness.

Spencer placed a comforting hand on the other girl's leg. "It's okay Ashley. Not everyone can be as great as me." And the brunette burst into another fit of laughter after hearing that.

"Great, yea, everyone that is great normally trips 2-3 times in a day. And after that comment Spencer, I don't think I should give you the surprise I got you."

"Hey! I don't trip- wait, surprise? What surprise? I am sorry Ashley. Now give it to me." Spencer was giving Ashley a 'don't screw with me look', so the brunette relented and revealed her surprise from her jacket.

Spencer let out a squeal. "Ash! When did you get my duck? He is so cute. When did you even have time to win this?"

Ashley looked a little sheepish for a second before replying, "Well, I didn't technically win the duck. I may or may not have broken into the machine using one of my knives as a screwdriver while you were returning our shoes with the angry little manager."

Spencer could only laugh and stand up from the curb while clinging on to the duck. She reached her hand down to help the spy up. "Well, thank you."

Ashley and Spencer were standing face to face now, fairly close to one another. It was a beautiful night out, and they were alone in the parking lot. Their closeness brought goose bumps to Spencer's arms. Ashley noticed and slowly wrapped Spencer's jacket around her shoulders, then rubbed her arms.

The moment was thick. The girls were having trouble looking at anything other than each other's eyes. Ashley softly whispered out, "Anytime Spence." Spencer was sure they could stay like that forever, when Ashley suddenly turned towards the street, effectively breaking the moment. It took Spencer a moment to shake out of it.

"Come on Spencer, I'll buy you dinner anywhere you want." It had been too much for the brunette. Had she stared into Spencer's blue eyes any longer she knew she would have kissed the girl. There was no doubt in Ashley's mind that she would have done it, the problem would have been if she would ever be able to stop.

Spencer let out a little sigh before falling back into the happy and light tone they had been sharing all day, "A victory dinner, huh, Ash?" Spencer gave Ashley a cheeky grin and then added, "I know just the place. I swear this waiter looks exactly like Mr. Belding from _Saved by the Bell_."

* * *

Spencer wasn't sure about any of this. Sure, she told Ashley she would be fine with the spy stuff, and it was fun and exciting to go to her hotel room and clean stuff out, but Spencer was nervous now. Maybe it was because the brunette girl with her seemed so calm. Spencer wanted keep the balance, so one of them had to be freaking out.

"Ash, I don't know about this."

"Relax Spencer, I have done this before. Well not exactly, but you get what I mean."

They had a nice dinner. And the waiter did have a striking resemblance to Mr. Belding. The girls sat and ate and chatted for hours, and were politely kicked out when the restaurant was closed and the staff began stacking all the chairs except the two the girls were using. They took the hint and left. It was somewhat late then, about 11 at night on a Sunday.

Spencer hadn't intended for them to eat for so long, but the conversation between the two never seemed to stop. Ashley had been begging the blonde for permission to read her novels. Spencer had obviously refused her, but Spencer had a feeling that eventually Ashley would be the perfect person to read her novels.

Spencer loved hearing about all the places Ashley has traveled to. It was amazing, and the way Ashley described them, with every detail, made it even better. Ashley's memory was something that, in itself, fascinated Spencer, and to see the brunette recall the smallest details from years and years ago was amazing.

But when the girls exited the restaurant, Spencer realized that their long meal meant they couldn't do the last thing Spencer wanted to do. She really wanted to take the brunette to the ice rink, but it closed almost two hours earlier. After mentioning it to the brunette and stating they would have to go another day, Ashley got a devilish gleam in her eyes and this is how Spencer found herself standing outside the back entrance of the ice rink while Ashley picked the lock to the door.

Ashley had done a quick scan of the building when they arrived. This would be a piece of cake. There was little to no security. There were no cameras, only locks on the doors and at most a cheap alarm inside. Ashley could break in with one hand tied behind her back. Plus if they ran into any trouble, it would be fairly easy to get out of it whether it was through running, or casually knocking out a few security guards, Ashley knew she could keep the blonde safe, and that is all that really mattered. So with a final twist of her knife, the door was unlocked.

"Wait here Spence while I take care of the alarm."

Spencer's eyes grew large. "Ashley! There is an alarm!" She whisper-shouted to the brunette that had disappeared into the building. After about 10 seconds Ashley stuck her head out of the door with a big smile.

"Come on Spencer, the ice rink awaits."

Despite knowing how bad this is, and despite feeling like a high school kid that was out past curfew, Spencer couldn't help but love this. The feeling of doing something exciting, the fun she was having with the brunette, and the absolute glow of happiness shining from Ashley. Spencer could only follow the brunette and link their hands together.

After finding a few lights, Spencer finding small speakers where she could play some music for the two of them, and Ashley picking the lock where the rental skates were, the two girls found themselves alone on the ice rink with soft music playing for them in the back ground.

Ashley was enjoying this. She knew how to skate, and skate fairly well, but for the blonde's sake she did not do anything crazy. Spencer also knew to skate, but she knew how to skate in the sense that she could skate without touching the wall, but could easily fall on her ass as well.

Spencer didn't mind her less then perfect skating skills because it gave the two girls a reason to stay so close to one another. They were gliding together at a good pace, both happy to be in the presence of one another.

Ashley had been a little nervous to see the naturally clumsy and slightly absent minded blonde on skates, so she stayed fairly close to Spencer when they first got on the ice. It was a part of Spencer that Ashley had come to love. The blonde was only clumsy because she was so engrossed in their conversations, or her surroundings. It was fascinating to Ashley to meet someone that could focus in on something and have everything else fade, so easily, into the background.

Spencer had to admit it was amazing being here alone with the brunette. It was definitely an experience she has never had before and she was grateful that the brunette convinced her of this plan.

Ashley was just enjoying how happy Spencer seemed to be. It was rare that Ashley used her spy skills for anything outside of her work. Hell, she barely had any time outside of her work prior to her "firing". What made this even better was that she was spending this time with someone that knew her, someone she didn't have to hide from.

While Ashley wasn't so egotistical to believe being a spy was like being a superhero, there were a lot of things and abilities that Ashley couldn't show or use when she was around other people that were outside the spy world. So to be able to do these things, to talk about her past, or to even recall something in perfect detail from 12 years ago was refreshing. There was no need to hide from Spencer, and that was something completely new and freeing for Ashley. She was grateful for it.

"Okay Ash. Now that you have gotten me steady, go do things. I know you are holding back, I know you can do crazy spy on ice things, so go have some fun, and I'll watch in awe and envy."

"How do you know I can skate?" Ashley asked, completely surprised that the blonde could read her so well.

"I just had a hunch. Go, I promise its okay. Plus it's the least I can do after that ass kicking I gave you in bowling, not to mention I totally beat you in poker too." Spencer replied with a big grin on her face.

Ashley could only smile, "You sure you don't mind if I stretch out my legs for a minute? I don't mind skating like an old lady with you." Spencer returned the smile while shoving the brunette out towards the middle of the ice.

Ashley began to skate, and skate fast. It felt good to move again. It seemed like forever since she has had any sort of exercise. The lack of movement was always one of the worst things about getting injured.

Ashley was flying. Every now and then she would make a hard turn or stop, or even do a small jump or spin, and every time the blonde would make a small gasp. Ashley was beautiful. Spencer didn't intend to watch the girl, but to see the grace and ease in Ashley's movements mesmerized her. She was amazing, and she had no idea that she was. Spencer was staring and she didn't care if the brunette noticed.

Finally, Ashley came back to earth. While it felt good to move again, she missed the presence of the blonde. She missed being close with all the laughs and smiles. It was almost unbearable for the brunette to think about how in a few short days she would have to leave this all behind. Ashley skated towards Spencer, realizing she hadn't moved more than a foot from where she had left her.

"Spencer, I know we joked about you being a bad skater, but this is ridiculous." The brunette announced when she reached the girl, but when she looked at the blonde she saw the serious look in her eyes.

"Ashley that was amazing. You have this ability to surprise me all the time." Spencer admitted with a smile and a small blush.

In return, Ashley blushed as well, looking down at the ice. She reached over and grabbed the girl's hand. "I know exactly what you mean Spencer." And with that the two girls began to skate together surrounded in dim lights and soft music.

* * *

The girls left the ice rink about an hour after that. Ashley left money on the counter (to cover admission and skate rental for two) after locking everything up. It had been a great day, and the girls walked home in relative silence.

When they reached Spencer's apartment, neither wanted the day to end. It had been perfect. Spending time with the blonde was so easy; it was always fun and effortless. It had been years, decades, since the brunette felt like this again, she felt happy and safe. It was moments like these with Spencer that she wished, more than anything, that she really was a computer programmer. It could be so simple, so amazing, if things could be different.

Spencer couldn't help but think about all her past relationships throughout today. Yes, she had been in love before, yes she has had her heart broken and has probably even broken some hearts herself, but none of the relationships came as easily as whatever was happening between her and Ashley. Nothing had ever felt like this.

The blonde loved spending time with the brunette. It was always perfect, always meaningful and lovely while still being fun and light. The girls knew how to bounce from heart-felt to cute to absolutely fun and silly. It was perfect and everything came so naturally. Despite Ashley's guarded past and personality, she tried to be open and honest. The girl was sweet and caring without even knowing it. Spencer could hardly imagine that the brunette is capable of killing, and got paid to do just that in certain instances.

But Spencer wasn't thinking about all that right now. All she could keep thinking about is the stuffed duck Ashley stole for her, and the sound of Ashley's laughter replaying in her mind, and the way Ashley looked the other night surrounded by candles, and the feeling of her strong arms holding her up, and steadying her while they glided on the ice.

Ashley was staring intensely at Spencer while Spencer slowly inched towards her. Ashley was still, so achingly still. As if moving would break the moment, scare the blonde away. Ashley couldn't help but look at Spencer in _that_ way, and she couldn't help but remember the warmth of feeling the blonde's body leaning against hers, and she couldn't help but want to be the reason the blonde doctor smiles.

After an eternity, Spencer finally made her way to the brunette. The blonde lifts her hand to Ashley's face, slowly brushing Ashley's hair behind her ear.

Ashley didn't move an inch. The blonde was so close to her. Their bodies pressed together so nicely, their faces so close their noses almost touch. "Thank you for today." Ashley whispers out, scared of being too loud.

And Spencer can't stand it any longer. She can't stand how perfect the girl in front of her is, and how much she wants to kiss her. And finally the blonde just leans in, but in the eons it takes to close the distance, Ashley's firm grip is on the blonde's shoulders, and the strong arms Spencer has grown so accustomed to separates them.

Ashley stopped the kiss.

"Spencer. We can't." Ashley is still whispering. She isn't sure if she has enough power to speak any louder. Everything she has is concentrating on trying not to kiss the girl standing in front of her.

Spencer only sighs with her head down. She knew they can't do this. Ashley has to leave. Ashley is an ex-spy. The CIA wants her dead. Spencer isn't equipped to handle all of that. She hasn't even been to Mexico!

"Spencer, I want to, more than anything, but I can't do that to you. I have to leave in 5 days. And I don't want to start something and just leave you. I can't do that to you, and I can't do that to me.

I have already put you in so much danger. I will not let the CIA or anyone else hurt you. Not ever, and especially not because of me. The best way to take care of you, to ensure that you are safe, is for me to not be in your life."

Spencer finally looked up at the brunette. She was being sincere; she knew she was. Spencer knew there were unshed tears in her eyes. The blonde girl simple fell into Ashley's arms. Her face burrowed into her shoulder, needing to feel the brunette keep her safe.

Ashley wrapped her arms around the girl and sighed. "I should leave now Spencer. It is only going to get worse if I stay." The brunette hated the idea of leaving. She wanted those five days, but it broke her heart to see the other girl like this.

Spencer slowly shook her head against the other girl's shoulder. "No, please don't leave Ashley. I understand, I know. It isn't safe for you here. But please, give us the five days. I will behave, I promise. Or I promise to try." The blonde mumbled out. She was still wrapped around Ashley, unwilling to let her go.

Ashley just stroked Spencer's back soothingly. "Okay Spence, okay. Just believe me when I say that you have saved me in so many ways. There is nothing I can do to thank you."

They stood quietly in Spencer's living room for some time. Spencer finally looked at Ashley, "You have nothing to thank me for." And with that the blonde gave Ashley a kiss on her forehead.

Spencer reached down and laced her fingers with Ashley's. "Come on Ashley. Let's go to bed."

And the brunette could do nothing else but follow the other girl into the bedroom to fall asleep together.


	13. Finishing Up Some Business

**Chapter 13: Finishing Up Some Business**

The next morning, Spencer found another reason to put her "spy skills" to use. Spencer was sneaking out of her own home at a little before six in the morning for a nice, long job before heading over to the hospital for an early shift. She had left a note for the slumbering brunette before leaving.

It wasn't that Spencer was running away or avoiding Ashley, she simply needed to run. The last week or so had been crazy, and last night was just the cherry on top. Spencer was finding it harder and harder to try and stay away from the brunette, and the idea of her leaving in four short days turned her stomach in knots over and over again.

Spencer understood they were on dangerous ground. Ashley was running away from the CIA, the freaking CIA. It was a fact that could hardly be overlooked. Scary, well trained, douche-y people wanted Ashley dead, and that was terrifying. Ashley needed to escape and disappear just to ensure her own safety.

And while Spencer was insanely concerned for the brunette, there was also her own nagging self-interest that was constantly reminding her of the disaster that could happen if they crossed any sort of line. Spencer was already somewhat of a target for helping Ashley, imagine the price she would pay if she were in some sort of relationship with the girl. Her own life is not the only one in danger, but everyone that she knows and loves. That thought haunted the blonde more than any other one. She would never want to put her family in danger.

All these thoughts and warnings were being replayed in Spencer's head over and over again as she ran. It was nice to just run, one foot in front of the other. It was just so simple. But despite all these anxieties and legitimate fears Spencer knew that her feelings and the situation the two were in was fairly simple as well.

When it came down to it, the blonde was, without a doubt, well on her way to being completely in love with Ashley. Spencer couldn't remember an instance in which she felt the easy connection that she did with the brunette. She loved spending time with her, they laughed so easily. Ashley was everything that the blonde seemed to have been looking for, for what seemed like her entire life. Spencer even loved the strange little spy quirks that the brunette girl had. But to act on these feelings was crazy. It was beyond crazy, and Ashley had the brains and the will power to let it be known.

It was a truth that Spencer hated facing. She didn't want to consider the dangers, and she definitely didn't want to think about how close they were to crossing some sort of line last night, but she knew it was good they didn't go there.

The other thing that nagged at Spencer was her uncertainty about Ashley's feelings for her. For all Spencer knew, the brunette was just trying to let her down easily. Ashley could just be connecting with Spencer just because Spencer happened to be around. Ashley, in certain regards, was still a stonewall; the brunette certainly had a gift for keeping her emotions and feelings hidden away. It was always Ashley that stopped any advances, Ashley that broke all their little moments. But then again, Spencer can't forget about the toaster, and the candles, and the way Ashley's body finds her own in the middle of the night.

No. Spencer will just have to be a grown up about all this. She will play it cool and enjoy the time she has left with Ashley. Then she will move on to another girl, one that won't need cover stories, and can actually settle down. Spencer could do this. She could do this, she went through med school, she survived her mother's early death, hell, she has put up with Glen for 28 years. She could totally do this.

* * *

Ashley was awake. She had been awake ever since the blonde rolled out of bed and tried to sneak out of the house. Despite the increased amount of time spent together, Spencer's spy skills were still the same as when they first went to Ashley's hotel room. _At least she didn't leave the house in a black ski mask_ was all Ashley could think.

But Spencer had left a note informing the brunette she went for an early run and would go to the hospital directly after. There was a smiley face, and a postscript asking Ashley to join her for lunch, both giving the brunette hope that she hadn't screwed this up too much.

But Ashley knew she had made the best, most logical decision for everyone involved. It was the safest this way. While the CIA seemed to have no idea the brunette was alive (Ashley had been monitoring, and hacking into their database to be certain Aiden was holding up his end of the deal), Ashley did not want to risk it. The risk was far too large to involve Spencer. Ashley had no issue with dying, if it was her time to die. It was a fact she accepted and knew going into this kind of life, but she would be damned if she sentenced Spencer to the same life.

So, Ashley would do what she did best. Ignore her feelings, her desires, her wants, and bottle them for the best and most logical next step. Her life was about survival, and this plan, leaving so very soon, was the best plan to ensure survival for both of them.

Ashley finally got out of bed, feeling more reassured about the decisions she had made in regards to the blonde doctor. She allowed herself to wallow in her sadness and self-pity over having to leave the blonde for all of 3 minutes before bottling it and getting down to business. She had a lot to do today, and before she left, and time was ticking away.

* * *

Spencer was, admittedly, a little nervous as she sat at their usual lunch table outside of the hospital. She hadn't heard from the brunette, but she assumed the girl found her note.

Relief washed over her when she spotted Ashley walking towards the girl with a large paper bag in her arms. Spencer was glad Ashley didn't seem upset after her disappearing act this morning. It was not her intention to leave the brunette; she just needed to clear her head.

The brunette placed the bag down on the table, "So I was checking out the sale at the library and I got you a present." Ashley was nervous. She was worried the blonde may be upset about last night, or even worse, try and kiss her again because Ashley was positive she didn't have the strength or will power to stop her this time. Ashley may or may not have got Spencer a gift to combat any anger the blonde may be harboring.

Ashley lifted out a book from the bag and handed Spencer a ratty copy of _Jane Eyre_. "Well I remember you saying that Chelsea had lost your copy, and I know the weird obsession you have with gothic novels so…"

Spencer smiled, and then quickly replied, "It is not a weird obsession! Come on this book is wonderful and great and dark. I love it."

"Yes, but it also ridiculous. I mean a crazy woman living in the attic of this dude's house? Come on, how weird is that, let alone how strange a way to start a relationship."

Spencer gave the brunette a pointed look, "I am pretty sure Jane and Rochester don't take the cake for strangest relationship circumstances."

Ashley understood the context, and with a small smile could only reply, "Touché."

And with that, both girls unpacked the bag to eat their lunch. "Thank you for the book Ashley, it was sweet of you."

"Anytime." Ashley was fidgeting around the entire time they ate. It was driving Spencer crazy.

"Ash, what's up? You look like someone put a golfer down your pants."

The spy was slightly amused with the strange example the blonde had supplied, but simply answered, "It's my stitches, they are really itchy. I think it might be time for them to come out."

* * *

After lunch, Spencer had some time to check out Ashley's stitches. Both girls found themselves in one of the examination rooms, Ashley shirtless, and Spencer in full doctor mode.

"Wow Ash, this looks great. They are ready to come out now. I can't believe how quickly you healed."

"Yea, I guess your body can get use to the strangest things."

Spencer was busying herself with gathering everything she needed for the procedure while Ashley tried to keep it together. After last night it was difficult to sit shirtless with Spencer and keep her thoughts purely innocent.

She wanted the blonde, and the blonde wanted her, being half naked was not helping the situation.

Spencer was dying to talk to the brunette. They kept having these little moments, these almost happenings, and while the blonde knew they shouldn't cross a line, ignoring it only seemed to be making everything worse. Needless to say, the sexual tension was only getting thicker and thicker. It was driving the blonde mad.

_Pull it together Spencer. You shouldn't talk about this. It is clear that Ashley wants and needs to leave, talking will only make her leave sooner then you want. _Spencer was constantly fighting with herself when it came to everything concerning the brunette. She had repeatedly made lists and lists of reasons why they couldn't be together, but when the blonde saw Ashley's smile, the lists seemed to be erased from her memory.

Ashley was having a lot of difficulty not gasping every time the blonde touched her bare stomach. Ashley couldn't help but wonder if Spencer could feel how warm her skin was becoming through her gloves. _This is ridiculous, she is doing a medical procedure on you and you are getting all hot and bothered._

Both girls were wrapped up in their own thoughts they hardly noticed the silence in the room. Finally, Spencer rolled her chair back after removing the last stitch from Ashley's side.

The brunette looked down and saw the small scar that was left on her skin. She lightly touched it.

"Not too bad this time." Ashley said, wanting to break the silence.

Spencer walked closer to the girl, and softly touched an old bullet wound on Ashley's collarbone. "One of these days you are going to have to fill me in on how you got all these." Spencer replied with a small smile. Both of their eyes moved down to the scars that were branded on the inside of the brunette's wrists.

Ashley replied with a weak, "Yea, sure" while she put her shirt back on.

"I better let you get back to work, I would hate for you to get in trouble because you were giving me free medical care." The brunette said, trying to change the subject as easily as she could.

As Ashley was hopping down from the examination table, she gave the blonde a funny little look, "You know, I kind of miss your IKEA table."

Spencer had to laugh. It was the first medical procedure she had done on the brunette that wasn't on her dining table. "I will talk to the administration about making a change from medical suppliers to IKEA for all their hospital tables."

Both girls laughed. "I'll see you at home?" Spencer asked, wincing a little at how needy she might have sounded.

Ashley smiled, "Of course Spence."

* * *

Ashley had some business in town that she had to attend to before heading back to the apartment. The girl was spending some serious cash on things she would need fairly soon. She had purchased a brand new laptop (Mac of course) and three phones, only one was activated at the moment.

Ashley had ordered two other SIM cards from two random states, and registered them under alias names, while the third phone was registered under Ashley Davies. All the purchases had to be made in different stores as to not arouse suspicion.

Ashley wanted a quick break before she continued with her errands. She decided to grab a quick coffee and read the paper.

She walked into the coffee place, the same one where she had met the blonde. It seemed like a lifetime ago since she was last here. So much had happened.

As she approached the cashier, she realized it was the same girl that had been there on that day, she had seen the fight with Spencer. Ashley took a deep breath; she was going to have to handle this as a spy.

She walked up to the girl and ordered her coffee. The girl gave her a strange look and finally said, "You're that girl that got in the fight with that blonde chick! What ever happened with that?"

_Shit, she remembered, just deny Davies_. "Excuse me?" Ashley asked the girl.

"You know, you were here like a week and a half ago, and you got that blonde chick to yell at you. Your name is Sam." The girl stated, looking at Ashley very strangely.

"You must have me mixed up with someone else. I haven't been here before. My name is Ashley. I'm in from Los Angeles visiting a friend of mine." Ashley replied giving the girl a friendly smile.

The poor girl looked confused as hell, and Ashley almost felt sorry for her. But Ashley also knew that people generally didn't argue in these types of situations. It was common for people to believe a stranger rather than their own memory. It was actually somewhat sad to see.

Finally the girl smiled at Ashley, "Oh, my mistake then. Sorry about that Ashley. I will bring your coffee over in a second."

And with that the brunette found herself huddled in a corner of the café. About halfway through the paper, a customer walked in and Ashley almost choked on her drink. It was Geller, the man that she had been sent on the mission for initially.

Ashley was at a loss for what to do. This guy was bad news. He definitely needed to be arrested, and a further investigation needed to happen to find all the weapons that were being sold. But Ashley was out of the business. The CIA had made that very clear.

Ashley watched as Geller gathered his drink and muffin and settled into a table. He had is briefcase with him. Ashley could see the allusive blue folder that she had been sent here to steal sitting on the outside pocket of the briefcase. Geller was unarmed and alone. He didn't seem to be waiting for anyone as he delved into whatever magazine he had brought with him.

Ashley wasn't sure what to do. Everything seemed to be staring her in the face. And then something hit her. If Ashley never completed the mission, then someone else from the CIA would be sent here to complete it eventually.

_Spencer_ was the only thing ringing in Ashley's head. While there was little to no chance that the blonde could even encounter another CIA agent, the smallest possibility made Ashley entirely too uncomfortable. What Ashley needed to do was easily decided.

Ashley grabbed her bags (all, but one), her coffee, and newspaper and walked towards the front door, near Geller's table. As she was passing his table, she pretended to trip falling into Geller's table and spilling her coffee.

"I am soooo sorry. I am just so clumsy some days. My girlfriend loves to call me a human wrecking ball." Ashley gushed while wiping up the coffee and subtly grabbing the folder from the briefcase under his table.

Geller's eyes were wide, and a little lust filled at seeing the brunette and hearing there was a girlfriend involved. _Perv_ Ashley couldn't help but think.

"Oh it isn't a problem Miss." He replied. Ashley quickly made her exit heading over to the library across the street. There she was able to look through the folder and verify it was everything she needed. She made photocopies of everything and quickly made her way back to the coffee shop.

Geller was still there. Ashley walked over towards his table again, interrupting him one more time, "I'm sorry, but I forgot a bag here, you mind if I just check by your table?" Ashley asked, she slipped the folder back in while he was looking around for her bag.

"It is over at that table Miss." He pointed to where Ashley had been sitting a few minutes ago.

"Oh thank you so much! You are such a life saver." Ashley called out while grabbing her bag and running out of the door.

As Ashley made her way to her next stop, she couldn't help but miss the rush of being on a mission. But it was different than before, this time she had a reason other than orders. This time it seemed to matter. Not only was she protecting the country, she was also protecting a certain blonde that had come to be a huge part of her life. That made everything about her old life different.

* * *

She ran a few more errands, for a surprise she had been working on for Spencer. Ashley was at the local hardware store, when she heard hollering come from across the store.

"Ashley! Yo, Ash! Wait up! It's me, Glen!" Ashley turned towards the voice and spotted the over-eager blonde boy trotting over towards her.

"Hey Glen." Ashley greeted while giving the boy an amused smile. She really did like Glen, he was goofy, and sweet, and a pain in the ass, but it was part of his charm.

"Hey there. Why are you here? And why isn't my sister following you around like the love-sick puppy that she is?" Glen asked looking around the store for any sign of his younger sister.

Ashley had a small blush on her face while she replied, "She is at the hospital. I am kind of here for a surprise for her. I needed a few things." Ashley answered the question as best she could while trying to ignore the "love-sick puppy" part.

"Oh, well I am glad she is working. I would feel bad stealing her food all the time if she wasn't such a high paid doctor," Glen stated with a small little smirk. "Hey! Since I have given myself the day off, and you are doing something for my sister, and not to mention how hot you are, I can help you."

Ashley typically didn't like help, especially when it seemed like the person offering to help would do more damage than good, but she liked the idea of spending some time with someone that was so close to Spencer. He could also be a good distraction from the strange day she was having.

"Sure Glen, but I will not allow you to actually help because Spencer has informed me how bad you are with any sort of tool. Also, I won't let you steal any of her food." Ashley replied with a light smile.

Glen flung his arm around the brunette's shoulder (it took a lot for Ashley to hold back her natural instincts of breaking his arm) and said, "Chill babe, I will not touch her food, nor will I be any use to you other than eye candy." He replied wiggling his eyebrows.

Ashley could only roll her eyes and laugh while she pushed the cart down the isle.

* * *

It had been an entertaining afternoon. Ashley had filled in Glen on her surprise for the blonde, and he seemed more than eager to help her out. After Ashley saw him trying to use a Phillips screwdriver on a flathead screw, she requested he could only help morally.

The two were cleaning up because Spencer was on her way home, and Ashley didn't want her to have any idea that she had been working on anything for her. It had been nice having Glen around. While he was exactly as Spencer described him, he was also fairly entertaining. It was also nice having such an uncensored source to all things Spencer.

Glen had offered story after story about their childhood, and Ashley ate up every word of it. He told tales of Spencer's stubbornness, her terrible habit of never backing down from a dare, her irrational hatred for birds, and her never-ending compassion. While Glen's stories were light-hearted, and most definitely told from an older brother's perspective, Ashley could see the love and respect he held for his baby sister.

Ashley also learned that Glen was working at the high school. He was, ironically, devoting his life to the place he once hated being stuck in. Glen's real reason for being there was the influence he had on the kids. It was obvious to the brunette he loved working and teaching them, and he also got a chance to coach the girl's basketball team.

Ashley asked him why the girl's team and not the boy's and she was surprised when Glen responded that the girls play with twice the heart and devotion than the boys did. Ashley was definitely wasn't expecting an honest, heartfelt answer to the question.

Hearing Glen gush about his sister inevitably shot a pang of regret and sadness into the brunette for her own lack of family. It was quick and sudden, and as fast as it hit, the brunette was just as fast to shake it off. In her thinking was there was no use in wallowing over it; nothing was going to change how things were.

It was nice getting to know the boy in this manner. She could see the little things that Spencer loved so much about him. Just as Ashley and Glen had finished washing up, and Glen had grabbed two beers from the fridge Spencer walked through the door.

"Hey Glenny! What are you doing here? Has he been driving you crazy Ash?" The blonde asked with a big smile on her face. It was a nice surprise to come home to her spy and her brother hanging out together.

Ashley was laughing at Spencer's little comment and at the look of utter shock on the blonde boy's face. "I will have you know little sis, that your brunette beauty made a huge scene of getting my attention in the store today, and then _begged_ me to come over and hang out with her."

Ashley shot the boy a playful, yet dangerous look, while Spencer gave them both a sly smile. "Is that so Glen?" Spencer asked as she plopped herself down on the couch between Ashley and Glen. It didn't go unnoticed by anyone in the room how much closer to Ashley Spencer was sitting rather than Glen.

Glen replied with an "MMMhmmm" as he brought the beer up to his lips. Ashley could only roll her eyes. Spencer gave Ashley a cute smile at this and grabbed the bottle of beer out of Glen's hands before he could take a sip.

"Hey! Oh man, come on Spence!" Ashley only laughed as Spencer sipped on Glen's beer.

"Well I will take that as my cue to leave then." Glen stood up and gathered his stuff. He gave Spencer a quick peck on the top of the head and said, "Spence, Dad wanted you to stop by tomorrow morning sometime for something. So call him." He then turned towards Ashley, "Ashley! My man! It was good hanging out with you. I'll talk to you later about some stuff and uh, other stuff."

"Yea, thanks Glen, you too." Ashley replied, while giving the boy a fist-bump. And with that Glen was out the door, leaving the two girls alone.

"Some stuff, huh?" Spencer asked, highly amused, with her curiosity peaked.

"Yep. I ran into him at the store, and he kind of just followed me home. It was a nice afternoon though. He is a pretty cool guy." Ashley replied, not giving the blonde any information about what they spoke about.

Spencer knew better than trying to get any information out of Ashley. If Ashley didn't want to talk about it, it would remain a mystery forever. They were both silent for some time, slowly sipping on their beers and resting on the couch.

At some point Ashley had leaned back into the couch, and Spencer's head had conveniently found her shoulder. Ashley's hand was slowly playing with Spencer's hair, while Spencer traced all the little scars that littered Ashley's arms. They didn't need words; they were content in the silence that they were wrapped up in.

It wasn't the most intimate moment, and it wasn't particularly special, except for the fact that both girls were exactly where they wanted to be.

"Hey Spence, I didn't know you had a crush on Princess Leia."

Spencer groaned, pushing her head further into Ashley's shoulder and mumbling out, "I'm going to kill Glen" while Ashley's body shook with laughter.

* * *

**Hello all! Sorry for the big delay in updates, I have been trouble with the next few chapters. I know exactly what I want to do, I just can't seem to get it down. Anyways, thank you for all the reviews, and adds, and favorites, it really is inspiration. Some shout outs:**

**Nightwish fan:** Working on faster updates, thank you for the review!  
**ILoveFanFic76:** I don't mind if you are a slower reader, as long as you review ;) Glad you like the story!  
**Miss Davies: **I think if Ashley stole me a duck, I'd totally be hers, thanks for the review, glad you liked the fluff. I am glad that you notice each chapter brings them closer and closer together, it is what I am aiming for.  
**mb168: **I know its sad, but bare with me, I promise you it will totally be worth it! Thx for all the reviews!  
**2bz2breading: **Glad you liked the fluff and angst mix, it makes it all the more gut wrenching that they haven't made out yet. lol. Thank you so much for ALWAYS reviewing!  
**LoLo06: **Wow, way to make a girl blush. I am glad you enjoy the story so much, I promise they will kiss, just give it time. Thank you so much for the kind words!  
**Irishgrl33: **Yea, they are weirdly made for each other in that way. Glad you liked the update! And thank you for being such a great fan and always reviewing, it means a lot! Ps. If you were Spencer, wouldn't you totally study Ashley too? Lol  
**imaferrari: **I am glad that you felt all the emotions I was going for, in the correct order too! Thanks for the review, and for always review, you are totally the best, and give great reviews! Hope you liked this one! I am also really glad that you like Chelsea and the rest of the characters in this too, hopefully Glen was entertaining for you!  
**n:** Thank you for the compliment! I am glad you think they are perfect together, it is what I'm going for lol. Thanks for the review!  
**bearlybreathing:** It will happen soon! You must be patient, and I promise it will totally be worth it! Thanks for the review!  
**adibou:** Glad you think they are cute! Thanks so much for the review!  
**Miss Nowhere: **Lol, I am sorry it made you sad, but I am glad you thought it was good! Thanks for the review!  
**101lincy:** I am glad you loved chapter 11! It was a fun one to write, don't be too harsh on Clay, he is smart but slow all at once, just like in the show lol. Don't worry, the girls will eventually tell each other how they feel.  
**.Dreams: **I am glad that you are loving this story, despite usually playing hard to get :), thanks for the review!  
**Sugarbaby164: **Thanks so much! I am glad that you love the story! Hopefully you continue to enjoy where it is heading...  
**P.A.M4Life**: Bare with me, I promise when they get together, it will be great! Thnks for the review!  
**hptriospashley: **I can't wait for them to get together either! Glad you are enjoying the story, Thanks for the review!

**Thanks again everyone! I will try and try to get these chapters done fast... **


	14. Confessions of the Best Kind

**Chapter 14: Confessions of the Best Kind**

Spencer was sitting at the breakfast counter of her father's house. She was trying to pay attention to what her father was saying, but swirling her waffle around in syrup was having more success at holding her attention.

"And so then I told him to go ahead and kill himself." Arthur finished his story, watching his only daughter intently.

"That's good Dad" Spencer mumbled out still staring at her plate. Arthur had enough, something was obviously on her mind, and he would be damned to just ignore it.

He quickly reached over and grabbed the plate from in front of her, staring at the blonde girl.

"Wasn't really finished with that Dad." Spencer said, slightly amused at her Dad's antics.

"Well, considering you just praised me for encouraging suicide, I would say there are things on your mind other than the waffles I made you." He said to his daughter with a smile. "What's up Spence?"

Spencer looked up at her father, her wonderful, caring, sweet father. She wasn't even sure how to approach the subject. Ashley was a giant point of confusion for the blonde, and not being able to tell the truth made it entirely too difficult to try and seek advice.

Spencer hadn't planned to be so disconnected this morning. She just wanted to pop into her Dad's house, collect the latest manuscript she had given him of one of her novels, and head over to work, but when her father had asked where Ashley was, her mind decided to take a holiday.

Ashley had opted to stay in the apartment claiming she had "some business to take care of". If Spencer hadn't of known Ashley was an ex-spy, she would definitely have had her suspicions now.

Her dad was standing there with patient and expecting eyes, waiting for his daughter to open up. Spencer had always found it easy to talk to her father, he was a sounding board of her life, but how do you talk to someone when you were limited in the truths that could be revealed?

"I don't know Dad. Just been thinking I guess." Spencer sighed; she could see this answer was not going to appease her father.

"What if there was this person in your life and they were perfect, funny, smart, the whole package, but what if it was just too complicated? And I am not talking difference in political views, or divorcee, I am talking life threatening, danger for you and your family members, complicated.

How do you know what is too much? I mean, seriously complicated. I don't know what to do. I just don't want to walk away and it be the biggest mistake of my life." Spencer finally said with her head in her hands.

Arthur looked at his daughter. It was painful to see one of his children this torn up about something, but he was not expecting that little speech to come out of his daughter. He placed a gentle hand on her head.

"Honey, I think you answered your own question. Sometimes love is stronger than everything else. Throwing caution to the wind is a saying for a reason. If so much is seriously at stake, but you are still contemplating whether walking away from this person is a huge mistake, then it is obviously a mistake. You don't walk away from something that special.

Love is always going to be complicated and crazy, you just have to think whether the person you are thinking about is worth it. But as your father, if this danger is real, please, please don't walk into it blindly." Arthur offered.

He was still a little unsure whether this is the advice he should give, especially to his own daughter, but then he thought back to his late-wife. Whatever circumstances they would have found one another in, he could never just walk away.

Spencer looked up at her father. He was standing there, still with his kind eyes, and his ever-present patience. She could tell he was thinking about her mother. Spencer got up from her chair and went to give her father a hug.

"Thanks Dad." And despite being 28 years old, she loved the feeling of being wrapped up in her father's arms.

"No thanks necessary sweet pea." Arthur easily replied, placing a kiss on top of his Spencer's head. The two finally pulled apart and Arthur shot his daughter a somewhat serious look.

"Now Spencer, I realize you were being vague on purpose, but I only have one question for you: is Ashley a good guy or bad guy in this dangerous situation?"

Spencer was slightly shocked at her father's assumption. The smirk on his face shows that she just proved his assumption about Ashley.

Spencer, with a slight blush, replied, "A good guy, definitely a good guy."

"Good honey, because I really didn't want you dating any mobsters." Arthur replied. Spencer was still a little stunned at her father, but Arthur cut her off before she could ask any questions.

"Don't worry honey, I won't squeal to the others." He said with a wink. "Spencer, you better get out of here, you are going to be late for work."

* * *

Ashley was busy. She had a lot to take care of today, and she would be damned if she couldn't pull it off. The spy planned to give Spencer her final surprise today, and she had some work ahead of her yet. She also had to figure out what to do with the papers she stole from Geller.

It was somewhat comforting to feel this stress again. It was what Ashley was use to; her comfort zone was easily nestled in life or death situations. Since she was 15 years old she has only known the stress of survival and it was familiar to be in a position like this again.

Ashley had a plan, but her plan required her to allow for some faith in someone outside herself, and that was definitely something she was not use to.

Ashley was getting ahead of herself, she needed to tackle one thing at a time, and currently that thing was to finish her surprise. Glen turned out to be more helpful than she imagined by pulling some strings with a few guys he knew in town and getting the rest of the materials Ashley needed (with Ashley bank rolling everything, of course).

Ashley could tell the blonde was slightly suspicious when she turned down her offer to go to Arthur's house for breakfast. Spencer's suspicions increased when she managed to inform the blonde she would be unable to meet her for lunch. Luckily for Ashley, Spencer didn't try and pry, but she could see the disappointment in the blonde's eyes.

The only comfort Ashley found was the fact that it would be well worth it when she finished what she had to. It also helped that the two were constantly texting one another through out the day. Ashley smiled when she read that Spencer would not be alone for lunch because Chelsea called complaining about a distinct lack of friend time.

* * *

Spencer listened to Chelsea explain the new concept behind her latest series of paintings. Spencer was definitely one of Chelsea's biggest fans, but now, like earlier in the day, she was distracted. All her feelings for Ashley were everywhere, and after talking to her father, and somewhat slipping up on Ashley's cover, Spencer's mind was storming.

"Okay Carlin, you have been an attentive friend long enough. I will stop talking and you can give me the dirt. What's bugging you?"

Spencer looked at her friend amused. Apparently she wasn't doing a very good job at feigning interest towards her loved ones today.

"I'm sorry Chels. I have been like this all day. Things with Ashley are, um, strange, to say the least."

Chelsea was surprised; she assumed that things were going great with the brunette. They were just so cute at the family BBQ that it seemed natural to assume they were together.

"What is wrong with your Ashley? You guys totally have the hots for each other."

"I don't know Chelsea. It is just so complicated. She is planning on moving, and she isn't exactly the type of person that settles down. I mean we haven't even kissed or anything! It's just, uh, so weird. She is trying to protect me I think. Or herself, but it means that she doesn't want to move forward. But we never talk about anything!"

"Spence, do you like this girl? Like seriously like her?" The blonde simply nodded her head, shooting her friend the most pathetic, little love struck eyes she has ever seen.

"Then tell her. Do something, everything is complicated, life is complicated. You can't let that stop you. And if that doesn't work I am going to call my Ashley and reschedule your date for tomorrow, and we can make your Ashley SO jealous. Or you could totally fall for my Ashley instead."

"I don't know Chelsea. You know playing games isn't my thing."

"Well in that case, my Ashley can be a back up, in case your little chat with your Ashley doesn't go as planned. The best way to get over it is to move on, and what better way than with the girl you were suppose to meet?"

Spencer only sighed, indicating to her friend her acceptance of this plan. _Looks like I have to talk to Ashley tonight_.

* * *

Ashley finally finished with the surprise and had approximately 3 hours before the blonde came home from work. It was a perfect time frame. Ashley jumped in the shower and was out the door with her computer, a few spy things she had, and Geller's papers in under half an hour.

Ashley went to the local car rental place, and rented herself a car for the day. She drove for approximately 45 minutes northeast. She found small little town, and settled down in a secluded part of their local park to get her work done.

After plugging in her phone to her computer, she pulled up an internet program that re-routed her call to over 12 different nations and 20 different cities in each. It was used to make calls untraceable. While Ashley knew she had this option, she didn't want to risk anyone linking her to the small town that Spencer lived in. It simply wasn't an option for anyone to know about that town, and the one person that seemed to matter to the brunette.

Ashley had taken photos of the documents with her phone and loaded it onto her computer. She had an encrypted email waiting with all the photos attached. Again, she used a program in which the email couldn't be tracked back to herself.

Ashley let out a big sigh, getting her nerves together, and she dialed a familiar number. It rang three times before someone picked up, "Duarte."

"Madison, this is your Aunt Lucille. I need to talk to you, but someone just rang the doorbell, can I call you back in 15 minutes?"

There was a pause on the other end of the phone. Ashley was holing her breath, waiting for the response. Finally, Madison replied, "Of course Aunt Lucille, 15 minutes would be perfect." And they both hung up.

Madison Duarte was the closest thing Ashley had to a friend. They had been working together at the CIA for around 6 years, and she was the one person Ashley didn't mind being partnered with.

On a mission, about three years ago, Ashley posed as Madison's Aunt, and since then the girls had used it as a cover to inform the other one to get to a secure position with a secure line so they could speak with one another without anyone being aware.

Ashley knew this was dangerous. Dangerous as it could get, but she actually trusted this girl. She knew in her gut that Madison wouldn't rat her out, and she also knew that Madison was the only person that would want to take down Geller as much as Ashley now wanted to.

Madison was a person that joined the CIA with the true belief that she could save the world and make it a better place. She constantly tried to reason with Ashley about the importance of what they did, explain the honor in it, but Ashley simply saw it as her best option for survival.

It was somewhat inexplicable that Ashley now felt the surge of wanting to protect anything or anyone in this country, but Ashley knew that she wanted to take down Geller. He was dangerous to countless lives, and Ashley couldn't just sit by and allow it.

But the more Ashley thought about the situation, the more it occurred to her, that it was not the country she was worried about, it was actually a certain blonde doctor, and her small circle of loved ones that Ashley wanted to protect.

It was the first time that Ashley saw the purpose and honor in her job that Madison constantly spoke of.

Ashley dialed the number again. This time Madison picked up halfway through the first ring.

"Ashley, is that really you?" Madison asked, in obvious disbelief.

"Yea, Madison, I am alive. But not officially, only you can know I am alive." Ashley wasn't sure how to even begin this conversation, but she knew this was her only chance.

"The CIA said you died while on mission to get Geller, Aiden went and cleared out your stuff. He said that you were definitely dead. What the hell is going on Ashley?"

Ashley smiled; she knew Aiden had kept his side of the deal so far. She had been closely watching the CIA, hacking into high level clearance emails, and alerts, it was true that everyone thought she was dead, and only a select few individuals knew that Aiden was the one that "killed" her. They obviously wanted to cover up murdering one of their very own agents without any reason to.

"Okay Madison. You have to listen to me, and just believe me, and above all, not repeat this to anyone. I was on mission; they sent me to Virginia (the more Ashley led everyone away from Spencer the better) and while I was there Aiden came before I could steal the papers from Geller. He told me the headquarters had sent him so we could bring in Geller.

Turns out the CIA sent him because they wanted me dead. I am apparently a huge risk to national security, and they decided the best way to ensure safety for the country was to take me out of the picture.

Long story short, I threatened Aiden to go back saying he killed me. I have no plans of betraying the country or anyone, I just want my life back."

Ashley let out a sigh. Madison was going to flip. In her black and white world, this is definitely not something she wants to hear.

"Shit Ashley. Shit. You are serious aren't you?" Ashley only mumbled out a "yea" in response, allowing the other girl time to process everything.

"Not that I am not glad to know you are alive, but Ashley, why did you call?"

"I need your help Madison. Geller is bad news. He has been helping smuggle weapons, and selling them, he isn't the top of the group. I have some papers that incriminate those who are.

I need you to lie, say you remembered something I set up for us incase I ever died. And that you found these papers there. You need to take care of this. It will only get worse if nothing is done. Geller is heading to San Diego tomorrow to meet with these guys; you need to take them down. But no one can know I helped, that I am alive. They will only kill me."

"Jesus Ashley. Of course I won't tell. I can't believe this could happen. It isn't right. It just isn't right."

Ashley felt awful; she didn't want to shatter Madison's beliefs. Ashley didn't have any other options though.

"Madison, it is okay. You know my story; it was bound to happen. They were just taking precautions they thought necessary. Not many in the agency know the truth, what you do still matters. You are still a good guy. So do this, save lives."

Ashley sighed. She sounded very calm and collected, while she believed Madison was good, and she still believed in the CIA, she knew corruption was everywhere. She was pissed beyond belief at how she was treated, but if lying helped Madison, it was something she would easily do.

"God, Ashley, you are one of the good guys too. Send me the papers; I will take care of it. You remember the secure account I have. As much as you will deny it, you are a hero to this country Ashley. Even if you only did it for survival."

Ashley didn't know how to respond; thankfully Madison saved her. "Don't worry Ashley. I won't tell a soul. You take care of yourself. If you ever, ever need anything…"

Ashley quickly cut her off, "I know Madison. Thank you. Kick ass, and be safe. I'll stay in touch somehow." And with that they hung up. Ashley sent the papers off, and let out a sigh of relief. She knew she could trust Madison.

Ashley looked down at her watch. If she hurried up, she could make it back in time to meet Spencer at home.

* * *

Spencer finally arrived home. As the hours passed after talking to Chelsea and her father, Spencer's courage began to wan. Could she really look Ashley in the eye and let it all out, leave it up the brunette spy? And as each minute ticked by, Spencer's confidence shrank and shrank. Maybe she wouldn't be having that chat with Ashley after all.

Spencer opened the door and spotted Ashley sitting on the couch reading. The brunette looked up at Spencer and gave her a full, nose-crinkling smile. It was enough to remind Spencer that Ashley was someone she didn't want to slip away.

"Hey." The blonde greeted, putting her bag down.

"Hey." The brunette beamed back, they both were distracted by the presence of the other. Today was the first day in the better part of two weeks they had been separated for more than 5 hours. It scared both girls how much they had missed one another.

Finally both girls shook out of their staring contest.

"I have something to show you."

"I wanted to talk to you about something." Both girls said at the same time, and both chuckled a little upon realizing it.

Ashley stood up and walked toward the blonde, gently grabbing her hand and leading her outside. "Let me go first, please" she said, excited and nervous to show Spencer her surprise.

Spencer was a little confused when Ashley brought her to her own garage, but then she noticed the keys of her car dangling in the ignition. Spencer spun around to Ashley with wide eyes. The brunette only smiled and nodded.

Spencer ran over to her car door, sat in the driver seat and turned the ignition. The engine hummed to life and Spencer was elated. Just as quickly as she gone to the car, she ran out and was hugging the life out of Ashley.

"Ashley, thank you, thank you so much. How did you do all this, in such a short time?"

Ashley was happy, she knew the blonde would be happy, but she didn't expect the blonde to have tears in her eyes.

"Um, some late nights, you sleep like a rock by the way, Glen helped me get some of the parts from some local guys, and it didn't hurt that money was no object." Ashley replied with a somewhat shy smile.

"I can't believe you did this, and without me knowing. God, thank you so much. I don't know what to say." Spencer was stunned. She was feeling so many things, Ashley had given back to her such an important part of the special bond her and her mother shared. This car, Ashley caring enough to fix it, meant more to Spencer than the brunette would ever know.

"Well, I am a spy. Had you figured it out, I would have been a little worried in my abilities. I, uh, just wanted everything to be fixed before I had to leave. I wanted to do that for you." Ashley said, wiping away the stray tear that was trailing down Spencer's face.

After a few minutes both girls returned to the apartment, Spencer more determined than ever, to make one last effort with Ashley.

Ashley was sitting on the couch, watching Spencer pace back and forth in front of her. It was amusing and nerve wracking all at once. Finally the blonde stopped and turned to face Ashley.

Spencer opened her mouth to speak, but nothing came out. It was insanely frustrating for the blonde. She was a writer and she couldn't think of a single way to start this.

"Spence, it's just me." Ashley said, trying to encourage the girl. She had no idea what would make the normally, always talking, freely rambling girl in front of her mute.

Spencer let out a big sigh and her eyes glanced at her bookshelf. Her eyes landed back on Ashley, she finally opened her mouth to speak:

"I do not love you as if you were salt-rose, or topaz,  
or the arrow of carnations the fire shoots off.  
I love you as certain dark things are to be loved,  
in secret, between the shadow and the soul.

I love you as the plant that never blooms  
but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers;  
thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance,  
risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body."

Spencer started walking towards Ashley while reciting the poem; she sat on the coffee table in front of the brunette. Ashley's eyes had not left Spencer's since the blonde opened her mouth.

Spencer could feel Ashley's eyes burning into her own. Spencer was shaking when she finally reached out and grabbed Ashley's hand.

"I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where.  
I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride;  
so I love you because I know no other way

than this: where _I _does not exist, nor _you_,  
so close that your hand on my chest is my hand,  
so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep."

Spencer was still holding Ashley's hand in her own. She brushed one of Ashley's stray locks behind her ear. The brunette was obviously shocked, but Spencer had finally stopped shaking; it was as if the biggest weight has been lifted off of her, so she continued.

"Ashley, I know- I know I just sort of sprung that on you, but we are running out of time. You are leaving the day after tomorrow, and I needed you to know how I felt. I need you to know that if the only thing holding you back is my safety, I don't care. I am willing to risk it because that risk is far better option than the risk I take by not trying with you.

I know that it is complicated, and I know that this is crazy, and I know how dangerous everything is, but maybe that is why this is so special. I think it would be all worth it, if we can go through it together.

I am in love with you; I think I've been in love with you since that first day we met. I love that you clean up the messes I make in the kitchen without me noticing, and I love how smart you are. I love that you know how to stop my rambling, but you still let me ramble. I love that you are the sweetest person I know without even knowing it. I love that you use throwing knives to peel apples. I love you for your past, your strength and, god, your resilience. But what I love most, the absolute most, is the way you look at me as if I am the best thing in the room. Your eyes tell me a story that doesn't even need words.

I just needed you to know. I couldn't let you just leave without knowing that if you are willing to risk it, I am too. Caution to the wind, it is you I want."

Spencer finally finished. It was now her turn to wipe the tears that were falling down Ashley's face.

Ashley didn't know what to say. She was shocked, and overwhelmed. She knew what she wanted, to just kiss Spencer, kiss her and never let her leave her sight, but she also knew what was right. Even if Spencer said she didn't care about the risks, Ashley cared. Not for her own life, but for Spencer's. Ashley knew what she felt for the girl. More than she had felt for anyone and because of that she couldn't put a target on Spencer's back. Ashley wouldn't. Ashley also knew that she couldn't say that to Spencer.

"Ash, please, say something." Spencer was softly stroking the girl's hair, waiting for a response, their eyes still boring into each other. Ashley finally turned her head away from Spencer and whispered out, "I can't Spencer. It isn't worth the risk, not for me. I am so sorry."

Spencer's own eyes filled with tears. She knew this was a long shot, she knew just because she was willing to risk her life, Ashley might not feel the same way. She couldn't be mad at the brunette, Spencer just needed to know that she did everything in her power, no regrets.

Spencer stood up from her seat on the coffee table, giving Ashley a kiss to the top of her head. "It's okay Ashley. I understand, I really do" Spencer whispered into her hair.

Spencer grabbed her bag from the floor and walked towards the door, "I am just going to go out for a while, maybe to my Dad's or Chelsea's, I just need a minute. I will see you in the morning." And with that the blonde left.

Ashley finally looked up at the closed door. Hurting Spencer like that was the hardest thing she has ever had to do in her life. She was protecting her; it was the best thing to do for Spencer. Ashley wished those were the things she could focus on.

But as she sat on the couch, tears streaming down her face, all she could think of were the words the blonde had given her, the most beautiful words she had ever heard. A speech she would never and could never forget.

* * *

**Okay, so don't kill me, I promise it will be worth the wait. I wanted their relationship to be realistic and them just jumping into it without considering all the complications seems wrong... I promise it will be better very soon!**

**Also everyone who has a twitter needs to tweet #southofnowheremovie to get it trending. I think it is a very big possibility that it could happen if we show our fan support. Everyone wants to do it and NancyLee Myatt will be involved and she was involved with the show during the first season and left because the n kept downplaying Spashley. It would be five years later, and ignore the webisode (thank god). So everyone go support, I made a twitter just so I could show some love! **

**Also, check out the behind the scenes promo video they posted! Apparently there is going to be something new released on Friday! .com/watch?v=MIBRUIiOWWI **

**And as always, thank you for the reviews, adds, and favorites! It really does help, you guys are great. Shout outs next chapter! **


	15. A Shot of Tequila Makes the Heartbreak

**A/N: Okay, you all may be mad at me, but I just finished the first draft of the next chapter and I promise you will all love me again! Sorry for the delay, started a new job... Hope you are all watching the SON promos, and you caught the ustream with matt, mandy, and gabby! Check it out if you didn't! Thanks for the reviews! Pressed for time, but next chapter I PROMISE will have notes to all you lovely reviewers! Thanks and enjoy! **

**Chapter 15: A Shot of Tequila Makes the Heartbreak Go Down**

_Chelsea is right; she is totally soooo right_ is the only thing Spencer was thinking at the moment. True, Spencer couldn't remember what Chelsea was right about, but Spencer was never one to back down from her convictions.

"You are so right Chelsea!" Spencer yelled up to her friend, who was currently standing up in their booth, ranting about how she was better off without Clay because no happy artist is ever famous; it is only the tortured, depressed ones that make it big.

Spencer had made her way to Chelsea's apartment after leaving her own home. Chelsea opened her door, saw her tear-soaked best friend and promptly took both of them to a local Mexican restaurant where they drank their weight in margaritas, and then moved to a more direct source of alcohol: tequila shots.

Now, after too many drinks, Spencer was clutching a horse piñata, while Chelsea gave a monologue to Spencer and the bartender, the only two people left in the small restaurant.

The horse had joined their table after round three of drinks, and the blonde girl had seemed so upset, the bartender didn't have the heart to take back the decoration.

Chelsea plopped back down in her seat. "See Spence, we don't need 'em. We can move away to an island, and I will pretend to like boobs, and you can pretend to like me and we can live together forever."

"Chels, I totally don't ever want to see your boobies, no offense." Spencer replied, petting her horse on the head. "I totally only want to see Ashley's." Spencer said, feeling sad once again and searching their table for a shot they may have forgotten. She had no such luck.

"Don't worry Spence, they are probably ugly boobs."

"I don't care about her boobs, her face is so pretty."

"She had premature wrinkles," Chelsea lied.

"And Ashley is totally so sweet," Spencer added, getting a dreamy look in her already glossy eyes.

"Too many sweets give you cavities Spence, everyone knows that." Chelsea remarked, having no idea how to negate that quality in Ashley.

"Yeah, but she is so perfect though Chels!" Spencer replied, not even thinking about the risks to her teeth.

"Screw your Ashley, Spence! My Ashley is a hottie, and you can totally mack on her tomorrow on your date. It is like perfect time for rebounding, and by rebounding I mean sex."

Spencer could only giggle in reply, and then her giggling turned into uncontrollable laughter, Chelsea, not knowing why, started laughing as well.

The bartender looked over at the two girls, and could only shake his head while cleaning the counter.

"I don't think I want sex or rebounding Chels." Spencer replied.

Chelsea looked over at her friend. They had been through a lot together. Spencer had been there for her when her grandmother passed away, the woman that had raised her. Chelsea had been there for Spencer when her mother finally succumbed to cancer. They had helped each other through every heartbreak, and every soul-crushing finals week in college, but Chelsea had never seen her friend this upset.

She hated Spencer's Ashley for doing this to the best person Chelsea knew. And as much as Chelsea wanted to ring the brunette's neck, and play it down for Spencer, Chelsea knew that something wasn't right.

The girls complimented one another in a way she had never seen. They were so bound to one another at the BBQ, it seemed like if Spencer walked 10 steps left, Ashley was unknowingly move to the left as well. But, no, Chelsea decided that didn't matter, what mattered was what the brunette bitch did to crush her best friend.

Chelsea reached over and placed a comforting hand on Spencer's. "I know Spence, but it will help to just see someone besides Ashley. Other fish in the sea, and all that jazz. She doesn't deserve you." Chelsea said, with a small smile.

Spencer mumbled out "totally" and nodded her head, tears brimming her eyes once again, as she clutched onto the paper-mache horse.

Chelsea turned towards the bar and yelled out, "Hey Stan, another round for me and my friends!"

* * *

Ashley had been tortured a number of times in her life, but this seemed to be the worst one to date. After the blonde had left, Ashley had cried, cried harder than she can ever remember crying. In the short time Ashley has known Spencer, she has cried twice, and that is two more times than in the last 13 years. Ashley was concerned about the overwhelming feelings the blonde aroused in her, but Ashley resigned it to the fact that she was head over heels in love with the girl. That small fact also made breaking Spencer's heart the most gut-wrenching feeling in the world. But everything Ashley did, and probably will do for the remainder of her life, was for Spencer.

Now, hours after the doctor walked out of the door, Ashley found herself pacing up and down the small living room. It was close to three in the morning and the blonde had yet to return. Ashley had some solace in the fact that she knew Spencer's car was at Chelsea's (while fixing the car up, Ashley may have put in a tracking device), but this did not put the brunette spy at ease.

The look in Spencer's eyes when Ashley refused her was haunting. It felt worse than the stab she received in her lower abdomen two weeks earlier. And Spencer's words, her beautiful, perfect words were simply replaying over and over again in Ashley's mind.

Ashley glanced at the clock again; only two minutes had passed since the last time she checked. Ashley had had enough; she needed to find the blonde, if only to know she was okay. She grabbed her brown leather jacket and was out the door heading towards Chelsea's house.

As she cut through the park she could hear faint singing coming from the baseball field. Ashley slowly made her way over to the sound.

There, lying in the middle of center field was Spencer, and what looked like a headless horse piñata. Spencer's voice drifted across the field to Ashley and she slowly made out the words, "One is the loneliest number that you'll ever do. Two can be as bad as one. It's the loneliest number since the number one. No is the saddest experience you'll ever know. Something something something. One is the loneliest number…" Ashley was heartbroken for the blonde, but couldn't help but smile at how cute she was. _Of course she doesn't remember the lyrics_.

Ashley had made her way over to the blonde and lay down next to her in the grass. Spencer had her eyes close and made no indication of knowing the brunette was there.

Spencer paused singing, and shuffled her body so her head could rest on Ashley's shoulder. She then softly sang into Ashley's ear, "It's just no good anymore since she went away. Now I spend my time just making rhymes of yesterday." Ashley couldn't stop the small tear that made its way down her face. The pain in Spencer's voice was obvious, as was the smell of tequila. _Guess that explains the piñata._

Spencer nestled her head further into the brunette, both lying in silence as minutes ticked on. Ashley had wrapped a strong arm around the doctor's shoulders as she felt the blonde's tears soaking her shirt.

Finally Spencer broke the silence, "I knew you'd find me. I left Chelsea and my car at her house, so Henry and I decided to take a walk in the park, and then like 10 minutes later, you totally found me. I think you will always be able to find me." Spencer moved closer to Ashley's ear, as if to tell the girl the most precious secret in the world, "My heart beats out Ashley's."

Even though it didn't quite make sense, Ashley was speechless. Despite everything, Spencer was still being so open and honest, and it was the sweetest thing in the world. It also made resisting her so much harder.

Spencer patted Ashley's stomach, "It's okay Ash, I totally know you don't love me, but I totally have half a bottle of tequila in me, and you are leaving tomorrow, so I can totally say whatever I want. God, will I totally miss you. Just- just don't leave, not yet at least." The blonde settled back to her designated resting place on Ashley's shoulder.

Ashley could only whisper out a tiny, "Don't worry Spence, just don't worry."

* * *

About an hour later, Ashley had managed to help the stumbling blonde back to her apartment, with Headless Henry in tow. Apparently Chelsea had decided the horse's head reminded her of Clay and it got the receiving end of a very full Channel purse. Spencer claimed to love Henry regardless, stating, "we've been through a lot together, man."

Spencer couldn't seem to walk the remainder of the distance to her bedroom, so Ashley did the easiest thing and simply scooped her into her arms and carried her to the bed. Much to the dismay of the brunette, that simple act was far more intimate than expected.

Spencer made no indication of being aware of Ashley's awkwardness towards the entire situation. Spencer was quietly sitting on the bed, with a strange little smirk on her face while Ashley looked for some clothing for the blonde to change into.

"You know Ash, I think I know why you don't love me." Ashley paused her search, her back to the blonde, and tensed at her words.

"Yea, I am just a stupid old doctor that likes writing. You have probably been with like spies, and Sydney Bristow, and like princesses. I am just not good enough. I get it. Don't worry, I TOTALLY get it. But Chelsea is wrong; you aren't the devil incarnate, you are totally perfect. You are an angel, well an angel that knows how to kill people with two fingers, but totally an angel. Ash! I could totally be the Charlie to your angel!" And with that the blonde flopped herself back on the bed giggling uncontrollably.

Ashley had not made many comments to the blonde, trying not to betray her own feelings, and really trying to not to hurt the blonde any more than she had already. But it almost killed her to hear Spencer think she wasn't good enough for her. Spencer was perfect, and because of that Ashley needed to walk away and not taint her life. Ashley turned around with sleeping clothes in hand.

"You know Spence, I have no idea about any of the things you are referencing." Ashley said, a small smile on her face. Drunk Spencer was sweet and hilarious and very easily distracted. Ashley had done a decent job of deflecting any heavy conversation, not wanting to take advantage of the blonde in such a state.

"'S okay Ash. There is so much I still need to teach you! And you will listen and remember because you are the best Ashley, not lame like Chelsea's Ashley. I can't believe that I have to go out with lame Chelsea's Ashley Stanford tomorrow. But Chelsea, Henry, and I decided that I totally need to try and get over you."

Ashley's face paled. She wanted Spencer to move on, she honestly did, but she definitely didn't want to witness it. Especially not with someone that was dumb enough to stand Spencer up in the first place. Luckily, Drunk Spencer did not notice the upset look on Ashley's face. She simply grabbed the offered clothes and started flinging her own off.

Spencer had gotten her shorts one (only falling back on the bed once), but was having trouble getting her arm and head through the correct holes in her shirt. Finally Ashley looked up, having collected her thoughts and helped the blonde out. After getting all her clothes on Spencer gave a little fist pump and a small "totally" while flopping down on her side of the bed.

Spencer was sad. She knew she was heartbroken. The most perfect creature to walk the earth was staying in her home, but there was nothing that could be done. She knew she needed to accept it and move on, but Spencer was drunk. She would take tonight, blame it on alcohol, on Henry, on anything, but tonight would be the last night she would allow herself to look at Ashley in _that _way, and to touch Ashley in more than a friendly manner. Tonight was all she had left to act how she felt, and she would be damned if she let it slip through her fingers.

Ashley started making her way towards the bedroom door but was interrupted by Spencer, "And where do you think you are going?"

"Oh, I, uh- um, was going to sleep on the couch tonight. You know- because…"

But the blonde cut off the fumbling brunette. "No Ash, get over here. I am drunk and I can say these things and do these things because I am drunk, and even if you don't think it is worth it to risk your life to try this, I know you care about me, that you feel something. So come back here and let me have tonight because tomorrow is really totally going to suck."

Drunk Spencer had struck again, and while she wasn't as articulate as sober Spencer, she definitely had her own charm. Ashley had no choice but to get into the bed and wrap her arms around Spencer.

Spencer's eyes bore directly into Ashley and she gently whispered, "There she is" Spencer lifted up a hand to stroke Ashley's face, "I never knew I could miss someone that was right in front of me." And with that Spencer fell into a deep, drunken sleep, while Ashley stared at the girl that was everything.

Ashley lifted her hand up and let her finger trail down Spencer's nose. "You deserve so much more."

* * *

Spencer groaned as she began to wake up. She was on her bathroom floor covered with a blanket and curled around her toilet. Her head was killing her, and she felt as though she had thrown up everything she ate for the last five weeks, needless to say, she was hung over.

Spencer slowly opened her eyes, grimacing at the bright lights that filtered through. She looked over at the bathtub and saw the brunette girl had fallen asleep clutching onto the headless piñata.

_Oh Henry, what a mess I've made _Spencer couldn't help but think. As she struggled to her feet, the brunette girl was beginning to wake up as well.

Ashley had only slept for about half an hour. After Spencer had fallen asleep, Ashley could not stop thinking about Spencer's soon to be date with other Ashley. It made her sick to her stomach, and she felt a rage inside herself that she has never felt before. It was slightly terrifying.

Ashley, after insuring the blonde was fast asleep, had begun her search on background information on Ashley Stanford. It was easy to find, it was what she did for the last 13 years after all. Ashley spent hours pouring over all the information she could find about this other girl, she only left the computer when she heard Spencer struggling in the bedroom.

After what seemed like an eternity in front of the toilet, trying to sooth the sick blonde, Spencer had finally fallen asleep. After covering her up, Ashley settled in the tub, with Henry of course, and watched over the other girl. Eventually she fell asleep, worried that Ashley Stanford would sweep Spencer off her feet.

Spencer turned towards the brunette and offered an awkward wave, a shy smile, and a tiny "Morning." Ashley just smiled back at the girl.

"How are you feeling? I- uh- I hope you don't mind that I stayed." The brunette asked nervously, while drunk Spencer had wanted her around, there was no telling what sober Spencer was feeling.

"No, of course. I mean, we still have today and tomorrow. Um, thank you for taking care of me. The night is hazy at best, but I am sure I was a handful." Spencer replied nervously rubbing the back of her neck. How do you have a normal conversation with the girl you were insanely in love with, that didn't want you back? It was new territory for Spencer to say the least.

"You weren't bad Spencer, I promise." Ashley offered, trying to comfort the girl as best she could. "I, um, do you want to talk about last night?" Ashley asked, hoping the other girl didn't want to; Ashley could only turn the blonde away so many times, it killed her every time.

"Uh, no, we don't have to, really. You know where I stand and I know where you stand. Let's, um, just leave it at that." The blonde rushed out.

Ashley let out a sigh of relief and responded with a small "totally" and an equally small smile. Ashley found it incredibly endearing that drunk Spencer _loved_ using that word.

"I'll, uh, let you get changed and stuff." Ashley said, scurrying out the door to let the blonde get herself together.

About forty-five minutes later, Spencer emerged from her bedroom, feeling somewhat ready for the day (or as ready as you can be with the world's worst hangover). Luckily she had today and tomorrow fairly free because she knew it was going to be the brunette's last days with her. She still needed to swing by the paper, and unwillingly meet Chelsea's Ashley for lunch.

Ashley Stanford had offered to meet Spencer at the same coffee shop as before, but it was too heartbreaking and twisted to meet there again. Spencer spotted Ashley on the couch, reading something on her computer very closely.

_God, she is beautiful_ Spencer thought. She couldn't be mad or upset at the brunette. Spencer knew in her heart that Ashley cared for her, felt something for her, but she couldn't blame Ashley for wanting to protect her own life rather than explore those feelings with the blonde. It was silly to assume that she would just because Spencer was willing to risk it.

The brunette looked up at Spencer her eyes softening at the sight of the blonde. Spencer dreaded telling Ashley the reason they couldn't have their normal lunch, but she knew she had to.

"So, um I have to run to the paper really quick, and I uh can't join you for lunch today, I uh,"

"You have a date, with Ashley Stanford. You, uh, may have mentioned it last night." Ashley spit out, hating how affected her voice sounded.

Spencer could only reply with a lame "oh" before shutting her mouth. Spencer looked at the brunette with a little bit of curiosity; Spencer had never heard her take such a sharp tone, on top of that the brunette's jaw and fists were clenched.

Ashley slowly got up and faced the blonde, her eyes were fiery, but Spencer could still see the softness in them. Spencer wasn't sure if that was for her, or if Ashley's eyes always held such tenderness.

Ashley was trying to stay calm. She knew this was all her fault; that she needed to bare this because she was the one who stomped on Spencer's heart, but it was killing her. Hearing Spencer talk about this other Ashley, knowing that this person would hear Spencer's laugh, ask her questions, try and become part of her life, killed Ashley. Spencer deserved the best, because perfection doesn't even come close to describing Spencer, but this other Ashley was far from what Spencer deserved.

Ashley said the words before she had a chance to stop herself, "Are you sure you should go out with this Ashley Stanford girl?"

Spencer was a little shocked at Ashley, and the directness of the question. "Um, well, Chelsea thought, and I sort of agree, that, based on last night, I really need to move on, clear my head. I figure a simple date can help with that." Spencer replied, not sure what to feel, happy because of Ashley's obvious discomfort, or truly offended because Ashley was the one that wanted it this way. On second though, Spencer knew exactly how she felt.

"You know what Ash? I can do whatever the hell I please! I poured my heart out to you, and you didn't want it. I understand, I do, it is a crazy situation, and any sane person would do what you did, but you can't stand there and pass judgment on me! Who the hell do you think you are!"

Ashley was shocked, she should have expected this reaction, but she was hurt and confused, and angry, and it was all that damn Ashley Stanford's fault.

"Me? You are worried about me? What about Ashley Stanford? Do you know that she failed her business ethics class three times in college? THREE TIMES! Who is that morally screwed up or stupid that she can't figure out how to pass business ethics?

And she has had three speeding tickets in the last 6 months in her yellow corvette! You hate yellow, and corvettes, even worse! She doesn't even donate money to charities, not one in the last seven years! Who does that?"

Ashley had been pacing up and down in front of the blonde during her tirade against Ashley Stanford. She was fuming, Spencer was too good for her, all the research that Ashley did last night proved how wrong Chelsea's Ashley was.

Spencer stared at Ashley in obvious disbelief. _Where did she get off?_ "Where the hell do you get off researching my date? Just because you are a spy, doesn't give you the right to search into my life! I don't care if you know 13 languages, or if you can kill a fly with a throwing knife! You can't just do this Ashley!" Spencer was just as angry as Ashley, if not more so.

"Why don't you get it? Why don't you understand? Holding onto hope for us is literally killing me!" Spencer yelled out, louder than either of them had been during this exchange, needless to say it shocked both of them into understanding the situation.

Spencer sighed, staring at the beautiful girl in front of her. She decided to take a different approach, in a calm and shaky voice she said, "I am going out with her today, despite the fact that you don't want me to. You need to realize that you broke my heart, and I am trying to tape it back together the best way I know how. She may not be perfect, but I am not looking for perfect, I am looking for a way to forget."

Ashley felt a bone-crushing squeeze around her heart. Not only did she lie to Spencer yesterday, she was breaking her heart all over again today. Ashley felt like the world's biggest bitch, and she knew what a big mistake she had made. She took a small step toward the blonde.

Ashley placed her hands on Spencer's arms, rubbing them up and down, "Spencer, I am so sorry. I know, I am a bitch, and I was out of line. I just, uh, I just care about you and was worried about you. I will probably always worry about you. You are completely right. I hope you and Ashley have a nice date today." Ashley said, trying to swallow the boulder that had lodged itself in Ashley's throat.

Spencer shrugged out of Ashley's hands, it was just too much, but she gave the girl a small, appreciative smile and mumbled out an "its okay."

Spencer turned and grabbed her bag, her headache feeling three times worse. "Well I will see you sometime after lunch Ash, don't get into too much trouble." Spencer said, trying to take a lighter tone after their exchange.

Meanwhile Ashley looked like a puppy that had just gotten kicked, "Yea Spencer, I will see you later."

And with that the blonde was out the door, putting on a brave face to try and start the new day.

* * *

About an hour into her workday, Spencer had the worst headache and was starving. She grabbed her purse in hopes of finding an Advil, or maybe something to snack on, but she was surprised to find a small paper bag inside.

She opened it up; inside there were two Poptarts, a bottle of coke, and an assortment of different kinds of pain relievers. Spencer found a note inside the bag:

"Figured you would be hungry after last night, also that you might need one of these pills, I wasn't sure which one you liked. Oh, I always thought coke was best after a night of heavy drinking.

Feel better- A."

Spencer sighed, getting over Ashley was going to take a lot more than a stupid date with a business ethics failure…


	16. Precious Secrets

**You all should be very happy with this chapter! A bunch of author responses below, so wade through to find yours! Also I'm on twitter if you guys are Southofnowhere8. Go #southofnowheremovie! **

**Chapter 16: Precious Secrets**

Ashley had to get her mind off of Spencer's upcoming date. She felt terrible; her intention was never to hurt Spencer, only protect her, and her rage over Ashley Stanford did nothing of the sort. It was a strange feeling- jealousy. It was, without a doubt, the first time Ashley had felt jealous.

So Ashley did what she did best, burry herself in work. She first hacked into the CIA database; she needed to make sure things with Geller were taken care of. Luckily when Ashley did a search, it showed that Madison had made the bust, but Geller had been killed during the mission.

Ashley smiled; this would be big for Madison's career. She had captured eight illegal weapons dealers, and despite Geller's death, the mission was considered a huge success for national security. It was the first time Ashley felt a pang for her old life; she wished it could be as simple as being able to call an old colleague and congratulating her, but Ashley knew their contact had to be limited, if at all.

Ashley then got up and thought about what leaving tomorrow would mean for her. She knew she had to go to Los Angeles and take care of some business, but after that, she was lost. Ashley's heart ached at the idea of leaving this small town, and a certain blonde behind.

In two short weeks, this silly town with one grocery store had become more of a home to her then anywhere else had. It was now hard to walk around the town without getting friendly smiles or inquires as to how her vacation visiting her old college buddy was. It was even nice to randomly run into the few people she had met in this town.

But the absolute worst thing about leaving would never being able to stare into the best shade of blue she had ever seen. Not being able to laugh with the blonde writer, or just being unable to cook her breakfast in the morning sounded like torture. And while Ashley would miss the blonde's beauty, and smile, and how their bodies found each other at night, what she will miss the most is the easiness in which their conversations came. She honestly believed she could listen to Spencer talk forever and not get bored, which was good considering how much the blonde loved to ramble.

Ashley rarely met anyone that she enjoyed talking to, let alone someone that she wanted to talk to for days on end. Spencer was interesting and entertaining in a way no one she had ever met has been. Ashley wanted to know everything about the girl, and not by looking it up as the spy usually did when someone peaked her curiosity, but through the girl herself. It never ceased to amaze her that no matter how obscure the reference to literature, art, places of travel, music, or even restaurants in Los Angeles, Spencer knew what she was talking about and was able to add her own insight to it. She was simply the perfect blend of light-heartedness (which Ashley's life has seriously lacked) and intelligence (which Ashley craved).

But Ashley needed to stop thinking about that. She had an entire new life to plan, and she had no idea how to start it. She began packing away the small collection of things that she had here in preparation for her departure tomorrow. She looked around the small bedroom and spotted her hoodie, the same one she wore when she first met Spencer.

One night when the two girls were eating dinner, Spencer had been cold and Ashley had offered the sweatshirt to the girl. Since then, Spencer had taken to wearing it around the house. Ashley's heart fluttered every time she caught a glimpse of the girl wearing it. Ashley debated packing it for a long minute, and decided that Spencer should have it. Ashley carefully hung it up in Spencer's closet, hoping the girl would notice it only after her departure. She hoped the blonde would look back at her fondly, but after how she behaved yesterday and today she doesn't think that would be the case.

Ashley glanced at the clock and sighed. It was 12:00 and Spencer was meeting Chelsea's Ashley in half an hour (according to Ashley Stanford's calendar which Ashley had found/hacked). Ashley grabbed her leather jacket, knowing this was probably a bad idea, but going through with it anyways.

* * *

Ashley was sitting outside of Ashley Stanford's office building, waiting for the girl to emerge. Spencer and her were having their date a few blocks from her at some California bistro, basically overpriced salads and sandwiches. Ashley just wanted to check this girl out, make sure there was no danger. It was what Ashley's life had become, trying to protect the blonde from any foreseeable danger.

Ashley spotted her mark; it was easy to find her. She walked out of the office, giant sunglasses on her face, huge Gucci bag with matching shoes, and an Armani business suit. The girl was hot, not beautiful, because there was a harshness to her features, and an air of arrogance that surrounded her, but she was hot. She was the type of girl Ashley would pursue in a poorly lit club. She seemed like a challenge and a bitch, two things that made dropping them after a night much easier.

Ashley got up from her seat and walked towards the girl, pretending to be on the phone. Ashley carefully bumped into the girl, easily gaining her attention, and knocking her bag on the floor.

"I am so sorry!" Ashley said, feigning innocence. Chelsea's Ashley had a face of annoyance and then (obnoxiously) checked out Ashley, her face changing into a smirk.

"Don't worry about it babe. You are totally worth the delay." She replied in a smarmy voice. Ashley had to hold back a cringe and eye-roll.

Ashley was already on the floor surveying the contents of the other girl's bag. Chelsea's Ashley was too busy checking out her ass to notice the girl was looking for anything to indicate danger.

Ashley wasn't sure what to feel: relief or disappointment because Chelsea's Ashley was clean, well, she had no intention of physically harming the blonde. _Maybe I should just knock her out so Spencer won't have to deal with the emotional abuse of hearing such terrible lines_.

Ashley stood up, her eyes staring back into the eyes of her unknown rival. Ashley fixed her with a cold stare and gritted teeth. "Well I wouldn't want to keep you from someone important." Ashley said, trying to control any anger she felt towards this girl.

"Right now, no one seems more important than you." Chelsea's Ashley said, only now, noticing the other girl didn't seem the least bit interested in her.

Ashley scoffed loudly. If there was anyone important in this entire world, it was Spencer Carlin. "Yea, right. Not in this lifetime. You should know you aren't good enough for whoever you are meeting." And with that Ashley walked away from the girl, knowing she would never understand the true meaning in her words.

Chelsea's Ashley brushed off the encounter, mumbling out a "bitch" while walking towards her yellow Corvette. Ashley rolled her eyes; _of course that idiot would drive the two blocks to the restaurant_.

* * *

Spencer was sitting at a table, facing the windows, waiting for Chelsea's Ashley. _I have to remember not to call her that_. Spencer had just gotten there and was dreading this date.

As the day went on, Spencer realized how much she didn't want to do this. It was the wrong Ashley. She shouldn't be wasting her time with this girl, but should instead be with the much better Ashley. They only had today and tomorrow, and even if Ashley didn't want to pursue anything romantically, Spencer was losing a great friend in Ashley.

In these two weeks, Spencer got to know the girl. They talked for hours and hours, until their throats were raw, and were never bored with one another. And Spencer had never met anyone that listened as well as Ashley. If Spencer mentioned something off-handedly, the brunette always heard it and remembered it. Spencer smiled at the thought of Ashley finding her a cherry ring-pop simply because three days earlier Spencer had mentioned she hadn't had one in years.

Spencer would miss her and her quite presence in her life and apartment. She loved waking up to Ashley, or looking over at her couch to see the brunette quietly reading. She loved sharing meals and laughs with her, and talking about anything that came to mind. And Ashley could read her so well. She knew when to further explore a topic of conversation, and when to back off something that made Spencer uncomfortable.

While Chelsea was, and would always be Spencer's best friend, Ashley had easily become a different kind of best friend. One that, despite the little time they had known each other, shared passions with her. They were so similar and so different, complimenting each other almost perfectly. Spencer was sorry to have to see that kind of friend enter her life only to leave so quickly.

All she could hope for was that after Ashley left, they would still be able to talk, if only on occasion. Spencer glanced at her watch; Chelsea's Ashley was five minutes late, and Spencer saw it as a sign from the fates to just bail, but as she was grabbing her things the door opened and in walked, whom Spencer presumed, Ashley.

The girl was good-looking. She was model/adult good-looking, too hard around the edges, too fake to be considered beautiful. In that moment, Spencer knew this wasn't going to work, but it was too late now. She would sit through the meal, feign interest, and get out as quickly as possible.

After the girls introduced themselves, with a brief apology from Ashley for being late, they sat down. Spencer glanced over the girl's shoulder, and spotted the ugly yellow Corvette. _God, she even has a vanity plate_ Spencer couldn't help but think. As Spencer mulled over "RichNHot" license plate, she noticed someone walking away from the restaurant, turning the corner and out of sight from the blonde. Spencer couldn't be sure, and she had no reason to believe it, but she knew that it had been Ashley's retreating and dejected figure walking away from her.

* * *

Ashley found herself back in the same small coffee shop that brought the blonde to her. After seeing Spencer meet Crappy Ashley, seeing them smile, and sit down to lunch, Ashley felt like she couldn't find any air. It was wrong, so wrong, that the horrible woman she had observed gets the pleasure of spending time with Spencer. She couldn't bear to watch them a second longer, and quickly stalked off to find some sort of comfort.

So here she sat, with a coffee and a restless mind. She had been staring out of the window when she felt a hand on her shoulder. She immediately stood up while grabbing the large hand, but stopped any further action when she realized it was Arthur.

Ashley gave a sheepish smile at her little freak out. Typically, no one would have been able to get that close without her noticing, but her mind seemed to be preoccupied. Arthur gave her an apologetic smile, "I'm sorry Ashley; I didn't mean to startle you. I just saw you here on your own, and wanted to say hi. Is Spence meeting you?"

Ashley winced a little at the mention of the blonde. "Um, its fine Mr. Car-" she was met with a stern stare from the man, "I mean Arthur. Uh, no I'm not meeting Spencer, she is, um, on a date." Ashley finally spit out, hating how hard it was to utter the words aloud.

Arthur gave Ashley a sympathetic smile. So things hadn't worked out for his little girl like she wanted, but it was clear to him that Ashley did feel something for his daughter. The pain in her eyes when mentioning the date was a dead give away. Arthur let out a small sigh and sat down at the table with Ashley.

"You don't mind if I sit here with you?" Ashley gave a small nod, grateful for a distraction from Crappy Ashley and Spencer. "You know Ashley, Spencer didn't tell me, but I know you aren't a computer programmer." Ashley gave the man a shocked look, keeping quiet as to not confirm or deny any information.

"You see, when I first met you I noticed some of those scars and bruises. I've been a social worker for some time and before I was in this small town I worked in Los Angeles. I know when someone has been in a fight. I also noticed a wound that looked awfully like a bullet wound when you were helping Glen up that day. I figured computer programmer might not be your line of work.

And when I forced Spencer to talk about what was bothering her yesterday, she was talking in very vague terms about danger and love. I kind of put it together myself, well not exactly, but she assured me you are a good guy. Right?"

Ashley was a little stunned. She knew she should lie, just call him crazy and storm out, but she knew she wouldn't.

"Arthur, I promise I not a criminal. I have never or would never want to hurt your daughter, if anything I will spend the rest of my life to assure that, I, in no way will bring her harm. It is a long, strange story that would be best left without any details attached. But I do promise you that I only want what is best for your daughter."

Arthur seemed to scrutinize the girl's response for a moment, and then gave a smile, visibly relaxing in front of the girl. He could piece together what had happened between the two girls, even if they couldn't. Ashley's insistence on Spencer's safety told him why Ashley had refused his daughter and while part of him was relieved, a much larger part, a part in which understood the depths of love, knew that he needed to try and help both these girls.

"You know Ashley, I have been married for 32 years now. Not a single day passes that I don't think about Paula; her laugh, her smile, her terrible singing voice, not one single day. There isn't one moment that I would trade. And if someone told me that she was going to die before her time, I still know that I would have married her, been with her because the 30 years in which I was with Paula were better than whatever could have happened in a lifetime without her.

There is no way to that I can convey all the love I have for her, and if I could have traded my life for hers, I would have in an instance, but I will never, ever regret loving her and being alone now. I would like to think that Paula felt the same exact way about me. And had it been me in her place, as selfish as it is, I would still want her to fall in love and begin a life with me as well.

That's all love is, it's a risk two people are willing to take. So many people don't take it, because of this reason or that, but when it is real and true, I do believe one day of being in love and having that person love you back is better than a lifetime without it. Under any given circumstances, I would like to believe that Paula and I would have been together. I can only wish that for my three children."

Ashley was listening closely, so very closely. Spencer had been right about him, he was amazing. She couldn't seem to find her voice in that moment, but luckily Arthur came to her rescue, "Oh man, look at the time, I have to get back to the office. I know it is your last day tomorrow, but I would really like it if you and Spence could come to my place for another BBQ dinner before you leave. Around 6?" Ashley could only nod her head as Arthur gave her a large smile, and a gentle hand-pat, leaving the brunette to mull over his words.

* * *

It was 2:30 and Spencer was just getting home. She had spent an agonizing hour and a half with Chelsea's Ashley. It was a terrible date. She was completely self-absorbed, and bitchy. And in all honesty, Spencer never wanted to know how much the girl made per year at her business nor how many homes she planned to buy abroad. The girl was too serious, and vain, and horrible to even consider having a second date with.

It only made Spencer more upset about her situation with her Ashley. Everything about them seemed perfect for one another. The way conversation flowed, how things could go from serious to light in seconds, how much they laughed when they were with one another. Her Ashley just made it blatantly obvious that Chelsea's Ashley was a complete dud.

Thankfully though, Spencer's hangover seemed to subside a little before the lunch, so she was feeling much better. She finally walked through the door of her apartment to find Ashley pacing up and down in front of the couch. She looked up at Spencer with big eyes and Spencer returned her gaze.

"Hey" they finally said at the same time, both smiling as they spoke over one another. Spencer made her way inside her apartment and threw her bag and the mail on the ikea dining table.

Ashley was rooted to her spot. She loved welcoming the blonde home, but today was different. She knew it.

Ashley opened her mouth to speak, gaining the attention of the blonde. "I, uh, I- How was your date?" Ashley said, not wanting to hear the answer at all.

Spencer was shocked to hear Ashley ask about the date, especially after this morning, but was relieved to find no anger or sarcasm in the girl's question, only curiosity and hesitancy if anything. Spencer was about to detail the horrible encounter she had with Chelsea's Ashley, but Ashley cut her off.

"Actually, I really don't want to hear about your date because I was right this morning. Not in how I went about it, but what was at the core of the matter. She may be successful and hot, but she doesn't come close to deserving you." Ashley was fired up again; just the thought of a creep like Ashley Stanford being able to talk, touch, or even think about Spencer made her blood boil. Ashley began pacing again as she detailed different reasons why Ashley Stanford was a terrible person.

"And she is mean to her employees! And, and when she goes out to eat she only tips 10%! Who does that?" Ashley stopped pacing, and realized she was losing the point she was trying to make. She slowly looked up at the blonde who was still at the dining table. Spencer's face was unreadable, but she was staring at Ashley, hanging onto every word out of her mouth.

Ashley's tone took a calmer, softer route as she made her way towards the blonde. "She doesn't deserve you because she doesn't know that when you sleep you need at least one foot sticking out from under the covers. Or that when you are talking about something you love you can't stop talking with your hands. She doesn't even know about your obsession with _Silence of the Lambs_."

Ashley had finally made her way in front of the blonde. The brunette reached up to push some stray hairs behind Spencer's ear, then brought her hand down to slowly stroke her cheek. Spencer's body was trapped between the dining table and Ashley; her eyes trapped on Ashley's own golden brown ones.

"She does things like calling you "babe" even though Spencer is one of the most beautiful words I've ever heard. And I'm certain she doesn't know the exact shade of your eyes. Even with my memory, I can never quite remember your perfect shade of blue. Every time I look into them, I lose my breath- God, you have no idea how beautiful you are.

These last two weeks have been the best of my life; even if I could, I don't think I would ever forget a thing about them. You- you have saved me in so many different ways Spence." Ashley took a breath, her thumb still slowly stroking the transfixed girl's cheek.

"And I do look at you like you are the best thing in the room because no matter where we are, I know that you will always be the only thing worth looking at.

I'm sorry Spencer -I am so sorry for breaking your heart, for lying to you, but I can't anymore. Ashley Standford doesn't deserve you; I don't deserve you, perfect doesn't even come close to describing you. I am selfish, and if I was a better person I could walk away from this, from you, but I can't. I may not deserve you, but I do love you more than anyone ever could."

Spencer gasped at this admission, her eyes still boring into the brunette's, their foreheads now pressed together, as Ashley whispered out the rest of her confession.

Ashley moved her hand down towards Spencer's chest, resting it over the blonde's heart.

"I'm sorry I broke this last night, but if you let me, I will spend the rest of my life putting it back together. Or better yet, you can just take mine. I'm pretty sure it was yours the first time I saw you in that small coffee shop with your disheveled hair and older than life chucks. It only seems to beat when you are around anyways."

Ashley moved their clasped hands to her own heart, and Spencer could feel how fast it was racing. She didn't know what to say to Ashley. She was so overwhelmed, so happy, so everything that words failed her. But before she said anything, Ashley, again cut her off.

"Last night, when I said it wasn't worth it for me, I only meant that your life meant more to me than my happiness, but now I see, I understand that I am not only sacrificing my happiness, but yours too. I want this; I want you. It is the only thing I know for certain in my life, other than how much I love you. I am leaving the choice up to you because for me, you are it." Ashley's heart was still racing as she gazed into the blonde's eyes. She slowly brought her hand back up to stroke the girl's hair, letting the silence fall around them. "You know, I think I've missed you for 28 years, before I even saw you."

And Spencer finally knew how to respond. She closed the small distance between them, her lips landing on Ashley's. It was soft, and tentative at first, shy even, but all consuming, blurring everything else around them. Both girls knew there was no turning back now. Both Spencer and Ashley had kissed their fair share of people, but this kiss erased every single one from their minds. It was like running out of air, and then finally being able to breathe again. Nothing else mattered except for their soft lips gently working against one another.

Ashley's hands were gently cupping Spencer's face, her thumb slowly stroking the girl's cheek as Spencer wound her hands through Ashley's curly hair, pulling them impossibly closer. It was Ashley that finally broke the kiss, but kept their bodies pressed together.

Spencer was grateful for dining table because she was certain that her legs would have given out when her lips first met Ashley's. She knew that she never wanted to kiss anyone else again.

The girls tried to catch their breath. Spencer had a smile on her face as she looked into the brunette's eyes. Ashley looked calm, peaceful, but slightly upset. Spencer was scared and whispered out a small "Ash?"

Ashley closed her eyes at the softness of Spencer's voice. Ashley knew now she could never walk away, never even think of leaving the girl in front of her. Spencer had already taken her heart and sealed it away in her own body. But Ashley still struggled with the feeling of guilt that racked her body.

"This is so dangerous Spence." Ashley whispered out.

Spencer just looked at the guilt-ridden girl, and wanted to cry for her. She knew the risk both of them were taking, but Ashley didn't need to be reminded of that, she needed to know that Spencer didn't care. As long as Ashley was with her, everything would be okay.

The blonde slowly brought her own hands to Ashley's face and whispered, "Don't worry Ash. I'll protect you."

Ashley's eyes remained closed but she gave the blonde a smile. "God, I don't think I could love you more" was the spy's only reply, quickly bringing their lips together once again.

The two girls walked towards the bedroom, only parting to help one another out of clothing. And as Ashley and Spencer fell into bed, Ashley had to pause. She looked down at beautiful woman beneath her, her bright blue eyes blazing, her shallow breaths escaping her mouth, and was filled with a sense of comfort, stability and love that she hadn't felt for over twenty years.

Ashley leaned down towards Spencer's ear, whispering her most precious secret to the girl: You are the only reason I'm alive.

* * *

**There you go! I hope it was worth the wait! Just a reminder, don't forget to keep watching the Promo videos on Youtube, and the Ustream video with Matt, Mandy, and Gaby is on Youtube now too! We need at least 300k by may 16****th****! Now on to Author replies (sorry I have been bad at them lately):**

**Miss Davies: **There! They finally kissed (and a whole lot more)! I hope you enjoyed it. And Spencer went on a date with other Ashley in hopes of moving on from Ash, she was just looking for a way to feel better. Thanks for the reviews!

**Superles: **Thank you so much! I am glad that you love the story, and I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I appreciate the review!

**LoveAsh87: **Yea, Spencer and Chelsea got pretty wasted, but that's what heartbreak does lol. Glad you enjoyed the chapter, thanks for the review.

**Lilce1992: **Yea, I wanted Ashley to feel some emotions she wasn't use to, so I made her jealous. Also, hearing that I made your eyes tear up got me all tear-y eyed, thanks for letting me know! And thank you for reviewing!

**MK: **I love love love your review! Thank you, I am glad you like them together! By the way, did I mention I loved your review?

**ShadowHawk kv: **Awwwww I am glad that you caught up with the fic and that you enjoyed it! Hopefully the promo videos will bring some more buzz to the fanfic boards! Thank you for the kind words!

**Hptriospashley: **I am so glad that you liked this chapter! I was worried people were going to get mad at me, but I love me a drunk Spencer. I hope you enjoyed this chapter as well, and Ashley's speech was up to par.

**P.A.M4Life: **Wow, I am totally blushing from your reviews! Thank you so much for being such a supporter! It really does help to read these reviews. I hope the happy chapter didn't disappoint! Ps. Followed orders and I am following you on Twitter!

**Noodles307: **I am glad you are all caught up! I think Spencer understands the dangers, but she cares about Ashley more. Don't worry I will explore this whole issue more in later chapters, but thank you for the review!

**N: **Thank you for the compliment, and sorry for the whole ripping your heart out, hopefully this chapter helped to rectify that! Thx for the review!

**Elly: **I hope you are done hating me! Thanks for the review, expect more Spashley to come!

**Miss Nowhere: **Ash didn't exactly run to her, but I think she heard you! I am making up for killing you in the past! Thanks for the review!

**Godlove:** As requested, happier ending to the chapter! Hope you liked it, thanks for reviewing!

**Brucas4ever:** I LOVE drunk Spencer, hopefully I can work in a happy drunk spencer. Thanks for the review!

**Imaferrari: **You rule! First I totally didn't think anyone paid attention to the titles, second you are so right! I was going for "Spoon full of sugar"! Thank you for the compliments, and for ALWAYS reviewing. Hopefully this chapter helped the bruising heart! Also, I am sorry/really happy that ch 14 got you teary eyed! You leave like the best reviews ever! And another reason you rule is because you love the Neruda poem! PS I am more a vodka girl, but tequila is good when I'm REALLY sad.

**2bz2breading: **Hope you liked the chapter! The girls will eventually talk about their situation fully, but for now enjoy Spashley! Thanks for the review.

**Potato: **First, I hope that is your actual username; I'm a fan. Secondly thanks for the review! And thirdly I picture Spencer 27, but like a few months shy of 28. (Despite the fact that she is like the youngest doctor ever, I apologize with my lack of continuation and thoughts on med school time frame)

**Cierra0137: **Thanks for the review! Hope you liked this chapter!

**Omgasmurf: **Man I love that sonnet too. I am currently trying to figure out more ways to work poems in to the story without it getting to be too much! Thanks for the review and I hope you liked Ash in this chapter!

**Pdsc325: **Yea I enjoyed writing Spencer's love confession; hopefully Ashley's wasn't too bad! Thanks for the review!

**LoveAsh87: **Glad you found my story and that you love it! Hope you enjoyed this chapter and you continue to review! Thanks for taking the time! (I am also really excited at the prospect of seeing Spashley on tv/film again)

**nightwish fan: **Merry Christmas! Haha I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and thanks for the kind words! It is very encouraging as a writer! Thank you for reviewing!

**AMD2689: **WOW to your review! Thanks for being so sweet, and I hope you enjoyed this one! Thank you for reviewing!


	17. Pillow Talk

**Just because the response for last chapter was so great, and I love you guys, a new chapter a little earlier then planned! Thanks for everything, you guys rule! Don't forget to keep watching the promos, shout outs next chapter! **

**Chapter 17: Pillow Talk**

Ashley had been awake for the last hour, intently holding the slumbering blonde in her arms. All that mattered to the brunette was sleeping soundly, curled into her and Ashley couldn't pass the opportunity to relish in that fact.

The girls had spent hours tangled in sheets and one another, exploring each other in a way they had been longing to for weeks now. It was beautiful, and hot, and fun, and passionate. Each kiss, each touch, was a completely new sensation for both girls and they marveled in the fact that nothing seemed as right as their bodies molding into one.

It wasn't just about sex, it was the act of something more intimate, they were finally able to give in to everything they wanted, and that made it far more passionate than anything else. They talked about nothing, they kissed, simply for the sake of kissing, they had sex a number of times, they even lay in complete silence, being content in hearing the other breath, but at some point the girls had drifted to sleep.

Ashley was now looking down at the girl curled into her side, her entire body pressing deliciously into the brunette's own. Their legs were entwined, and Spencer was delicately holding one of the brunette's hands. Despite being right in front of her, Ashley missed Spencer, missed her voice, her soft eyes, and her beautiful smile. The spy was bursting with need to talk to Spencer, and she knew she would give in and eventually wake the girl up, too excited at the prospect of speaking with her, but Ashley waited. She wanted to give Spencer just a minute more, honestly she would give Spencer her left arm, but for the time being, a minute was all Ashley could offer.

The brunette began stroking the mess of blonde hair that was resting on her chest. She scooted down, lips pressing into the top of the blonde's head, then her temple, her cheek, and finally her nose. The blonde was beginning to stir, fighting off the last bit of sleep that clung to her. Ashley was determined to see her favorite pair of eyes, and slowly traced the girl's nose with the tip of her finger while whispering out, "Spence, wake up for me."

The blonde was being stubborn, and refused to wake up for the brunette, so Ashley decided maybe she could give Spencer another minute. Ashley slowly began brushing Spencer's hair back, placing another gentle kiss to the top of her head. Ashley slowly began to talk to the girl, despite her sleeping state.

"You know, I never got to recite a poem to you," Ashley quietly whispered. Ashley began to murmur out a poem for the blonde:

"somewhere i have never travelled, gladly beyond  
any experience, your eyes have their silence:  
in your most frail gesture are things which enclose me,  
or which i cannot touch because they are too near"

Ashley could feel the blonde slowly waking up, and the brunette's heart began to race in anticipation, but she continued on,

"your slightest look easily will unclose me  
though i have closed myself as fingers,  
you open always petal by petal myself as Spring opens  
(touching skillfully, mysteriously)her first rose

or if your wish be to close me, i and  
my life will shut very beautifully, suddenly,  
as when the heart of this flower imagines  
the snow carefully everywhere descending;

nothing which we are to perceive in this world equals  
the power of your intense fragility: whose texture  
compels me with the color of its countries,  
rendering death and forever with each breathing

(i do not know what it is about you that closes  
and opens; only something in me understands  
the voice of your eyes is deeper than all roses)  
nobody, not even the rain, has such small hands"

Spencer had been aware of Ashley since her first request of waking up, but she was glad she remained half asleep so she could hear the spy recite one of her favorite poems. Spencer finally responded to the girl with a smile, her eyes still closed.

It was almost torture for Ashley, knowing the girl was awake, but keeping her eyes closed. Spencer placed a small kiss on the girl's shoulder, her silent thank you for the beautiful words. "And why am I being woken up right now Ashley?" Spencer jokingly scolded, her voice raspy with sleep. She finally opened her eyes to look up to the beautiful girl.

Ashley let out a sigh of relief, she was certain she would never get tired of looking into Spencer's eyes. They were bright and happy in this particular instance and Ashley's heart swelled knowing it was partly because of her. "Awww, there she is. I missed you and your blue berry eyes" Ashley responded, giving the amused, yet baffled blonde a quick peck on the lips.

"Not that I'm complaining Ash, but I'm completely naked, and you are completely naked, you recited me a love poem in my sleep" Ashley couldn't help but blush at Spencer's mention of the poem "and you want to stare into my eyes? You must have hit your head one too many times on missions." Spencer responded with a slight smirk. In all honestly, while Ashley's body was beautiful, and perfect in every sense of the word, Spencer understood Ashley. The blonde could stare into those golden brown eyes for days, and never fully understand their true depth.

"It's not my eyes you should worry about, but my hands." Ashley replied, slowly stroking the blonde's back, with a playful gleam in her eyes, wiggling her eyebrows up and down in a suggestive manner. The blonde laughed at the girl's words.

"I'm sorry Spence, I had to wake you up; I just couldn't wait any longer. I just want to talk." The brunette admitted, slightly hating how needy she sounded. But she was rewarded with a huge smile from the doctor, so she felt better.

Spencer brought her nose up to nuzzle the side of Ashley's face, placing a small kiss by her ear, and whispering out, "Don't worry Ash, I missed you too. Dream Ashley has nothing on you. But I have some things besides talking on my mind." To emphasis her point, Spencer gently bit on Ashley's bottom lip.

Ashley groaned when Spencer's hands began moving all over her body, and Spencer pressed her body into Ashley's. Talking would have to be placed on the back burner for a moment.

* * *

"And what about here?" Spencer asked as she placed a gentle kiss on a large scar that branded the bicep of Ashley's left arm.

Ashley looked down at the scar and then into Spencer's eyes. She revealed a small smile while pushing the hair out of Spencer's face. Ashley's hand trailed down, slowly stroking the side of the girl's face. Spending so much time in bed was doing nothing to tame the doctor's unruly hair. Neither girl seemed to mind too much.

"That one was from a sword fight in Indonesia. I got distracted because Madison was getting her ass kicked by some guy and I had to help her out. It was her fault our cover was blown in the first place too!" Ashley scowled, remembering Madison's slip up during their mission.

Spencer stared down at the pouting brunette. _She is so cute when she frowns like that_. Spencer couldn't help but kiss the little frown line that formed on the girl's forehead.

"Madison, huh? Should I worry about this chick? She seems to be in a lot of your spy stories…" Spencer teased (only half joking) the brunette spy.

Ashley scoffed at the idea. "Madison? Yea, right. She was just the only partner I worked with that I didn't want to murder while on mission. I wouldn't call her a friend, but she was probably the closest thing I had to it. She didn't know me, no one did." Ashley looked up at Spencer, knowing she was considering her words.

"Spence, I know it is hard to believe, because I have never acted this way with you, but no one saw this, no one saw me. I was a shell of a person and that is what everyone saw. No one knew about my father, or my mother, or even just how long I had been working for the CIA. I didn't tell anyone anything personal about me. It was the best way to ensure my safety. But, god, with you, I can't seem to shut up." Ashley smiled and sealed her words with a light kiss to the girl's temple.

Spencer smiled back at Ashley, her heart fluttering every time the girl leaned in to kiss her. In the past few hours they had shared a countless amount of kisses (among other things) and it still made the blonde get butterflies knowing the brunette was about to kiss her, even if only on the head.

"Yea, I am aware of your inability to shut up," the blonde joked. Laughing a little when the brunette frowned. To make up for her remark, Spencer gave the girl a sweet kiss.

"But seriously, I would hate to use my spy moves on that bitch." Spencer replied lightly, knowing that Ashley would find it entertaining. Ashley shook with laughter, trying to picture "Spy Spencer" attempt to attack Madison. Needless to say the brunette could barely breathe, she was laughing so hard.

"Hey! It's not that funny!" Spencer squealed, whacking the girl on the arm. Ashley finally calmed down, allowing for Spencer's game to continue. Spencer moved towards Ashley's collarbone, and pressed a kiss into an old bullet wound.

"This one?" The girl questioned. Spencer hated hearing all these answers, knowing how often Ashley had faced death, knowing that people wanted to kill the beautiful, smart, funny girl that was sharing her bed. It hurt Spencer, but she needed to know. She wanted to know the girl's past, and that included the details that literally scarred the spy.

Ashley let out a sigh. She liked the Indonesia story far more than this one. Ashley pulled away from the blonde a little so she could show her everything. "This one" Ashley said pointing to the bullet wound on her collarbone, "this one" pointing to another bullet wound on her hip, "this one" showing a rectangular burn mark on her thigh, "and this one" finally pointing to a thick gash on her back "are all from Spain. I was shot there, in the collarbone first, and they kept me hostage for three days, questioning me. I managed to escape, but not before they could do all that."

Ashley looked at the Spencer, worried about how she would react. She didn't want to tell Spencer what happened in Spain when the blonde first asked two weeks ago for fear of her reaction, now Ashley's fear had increased tenfold.

Spencer's eyes sparkled with unshed tears, but she simply remained quiet. She slowly leaned down, tenderly kissing each scar from Spain, hoping she could erase some of the pain the brunette may have felt. It was stupid and silly, but Spencer felt so helpless in the situation.

Ashley couldn't help but smile. She never would have imagined feeling grateful for all the scars that branded her body, but as Spencer placed a final kiss on the scar on her hip, she knew they were worth it.

"Don't worry Spencer. It was the past. It was what I did, and despite all these scars, I did it well. Had it been any other agent, they would have been dead. I don't relive these missions, they don't haunt me; they were simply a way to survive. I think these missions are affecting you more than me." Ashley said, trying to ease the girl's pain. It was true, there were few things that haunted Ashley, and none of them were the missions in which she almost lost her life. It was simply part of the job.

"No, no, I am fine. I just, you- no one should ever try and hurt something as great as you. I want to know this stuff. It just makes me realize how lucky I am to have you." Spencer said, meaning every word. Spencer looked back at the brunette's body, trying to find more scars she hadn't asked about.

Her fingers slowly traced the small gash that was on Ashley's side from Aiden's knife. Placing a small kiss on it she mumbled out, "I know where this one is from" and continued her search. She spotted one on Ashley's knee, giving it a small kiss "What about this one? India? No, Japan with a sushi chef/evil genius?"

Ashley smirked at the blonde, "No smartass. That one was from falling off my bike when I was 7." And Spencer reacted in the best way imaginable, with a shriek of laughter. It was such a pleasant surprise to hear a normal story from the brunette. Spencer could only hope to create more of those for Ashley. The blonde, while still smiling like a maniac, sat up, straddling the girl beneath her, pinning Ashley's hands above her head (and giving Ashley a very nice view of her bare chest).

"Smartass huh? Well at least I knew how to ride a bike Ms. Bad Ass Spy. I'll show you smart ass." Spencer growled the last line out just before she reached down to give the brunette a deep and heated kiss.

The game would have to be put on hold for a little longer.

* * *

The girls were still lying in the bed, only now their heads rested at the foot of the bed, delicately wrapped in sheets, having lost the comforter a few rounds ago. Ashley's head rested on Spencer's chest as the blonde girl played with the brunette's curls. Ashley's hand was softly tracing each line inside the young doctor's palm, as if she were committing it to memory.

They had been resting like this for quiet some time, content in the silence and peace in their afterglow. The sun had long since disappeared, and the girls were close to missing dinnertime as well, but neither seemed to mind.

Ashley placed a soft kiss on the inside of Spencer's palm, and the blonde couldn't help but smile down at the girl. It was unbelievable to Spencer how soft and delicate this girl was with her, yet how deadly she was to anyone that stood in her way. Spencer knew and understood how dangerous Ashley was. They had spent some time talking about the brunette's past in the CIA, and while Spencer didn't ask for gory details, she understood that the beautiful, soft, and loving girl on top of her had killed a great number of people. Her strength and training are clearly reflected in the girl's body, but it was more than that, her simple actions reflected the years she spent with the CIA.

Ashley's natural urges and reactions were those of someone that had spent their entire life on the run, flinching from touches, ready to attack if surprised, always prepared to take on any bad guys she may encounter. But when Ashley was with Spencer, when they were together in this way, the brunette was gentle and soft, as if Spencer was the most delicate thing on the planet.

It was instances like Ashley placing a tender kiss on her palm that reminded the blonde how much Ashley must care for her. It shocked Spencer to see the so naturally reserved brunette so caring and gentle with her. It made Spencer's heart swell.

Spencer leaned down to give the girl a delicate peck on the temple as the brunette continued the trace the lines on her palm. Ashley smiled at the contact, and finally broke the silence.

"You know, each one of these lines is suppose to mean something. You want me to tell you what they mean for you?" Ashley looked up at the blonde, her eyes shining and light, Spencer was glad to see the playfulness in them. She gave the brunette a big smile and a nod.

"Well this line here, it's your love line. Oh no, bad news Spence; says here that you are going to marry a fat, balding, sweaty man, a plumber to be exact, that only enjoys beef jerky and NASCAR. Shame." Ashley playfully answered. Spencer only smirked with one eyebrow raised, but Ashley continued on.

"Oh man, and these lines here on the side, they tell you how many children you are having, you better get ready, you and the hubby are looking at about 7 kids! All boys that refuse to eat vegetables and believe women belong in the kitchen. And this line, well more bad news, its your wealth and luck line, ignore how far up it goes, it really means you are going to be eat out of trash cans. Good thing the kids don't like vegetables."

Ashley's eyes were laughing with joy as she traced each line in Spencer's hand, creating a horrible (and well fabricated) life for her, while Spencer listened on in amusement. "And this line, this is your life line-" Spencer cut off the brunette before she could finish.

"Let me guess? I die a young and terrible death at a monster truck show with my husband and children? Or maybe premature heart attack from all the beef jerky?" Spencer questioned with a big smile on her face.

Ashley's face grew a little solemn, as she stared into the girl's eyes, her hand never stopping the small pattern she traced on Spencer's palm. "No Spence, you will never have a short life or a terrible death. You will die as an old lady completely content with how your life unfolded." Ashley finally replied; the sincerity of her words was simply stunning. Before Spencer could react, Ashley reached up and gave her a slow and passionate kiss.

Ashley pulled her lips apart from Spencer's, still close enough to barely touch, "You and the plumber will have a very long life together."

At that, Spencer groaned in response and flipped the brunette on her back while Ashley howled with laughter. Even when Spencer began kissing the girl firmly, she could still feel Ashley's body shaking from laughter.

* * *

Ashley's body was tightly pressed against Spencer's, effectively spooning her. Spencer marveled in the feel of the brunette's bare front pressing against her back. She sighed; she was absolutely content. Ashley's strong arms were wrapped around her little body, and Spencer was softly stroking the arm that covered her own. Ashley had fallen asleep a little while ago, but Spencer wanted to stay awake a little longer.

Her eyes caught the scar she hadn't asked about, well the two scars she hadn't asked about. Two thin, deep scars that branded the inside of the brunette's wrists. She was so curious about them; she wanted to know when the weight of her problems was too much for the brunette to bear. Spencer would spend the rest of her life to make sure Ashley never felt that hopeless or alone again. The blonde's thumb slowly stroked the old wound. She knew she was scared to ask Ashley about its origin.

Ashley's sleep heavy voice almost startled Spencer, "You don't have to be afraid." Ashley nuzzled her face closer to the blonde's. Spencer had no idea how long Ashley had been awake, but based on the sound of her voice it couldn't have been long. Spencer was also unaware that the brunette knew she was awake; Spencer simply chalked it up to the spy thing.

Ashley placed a soft kiss behind the girl's ear and whispered it again. "Don't be afraid. Just ask, you can ask me anything."

Sometimes it scared Spencer how well Ashley could read her. It was a comfort to know the brunette was always on the same page as she was. Spencer lifted up Ashley's arm, placing a delicate kiss on the scar residing inside her wrist, "How did you get these scars?"

Spencer turned around in Ashley's arms; she wanted to be able to look in the girl's eyes when they had this conversation, if only for Ashley to offer her strength to listen to the story.

"It was a long time ago. Almost 14 years now. After they arrested my dad, I was sent to an orphanage. For whatever reason, I was sent to a foster home fairly quickly. It was this middle-aged couple, the woman was okay, but the man, he was terrible. He yelled at his wife, and their two kids. He was a drunk, a loser.

One night he came home, he was drunk out of his mind, and ran into my room. He was on my bed and he started grabbing me, trying to, I don't know, molest me, I suppose. He didn't get far though; I kicked him on to the floor. I just kept hitting him and hitting him, and because he was drunk he would get back up and say something like I was slut, or I couldn't stop him, and it would set me off again.

Finally the wife ran in and pulled me off of him. I had beaten him so badly. After the training with my dad, I was no stranger to fighting. It turned out I broke a few of his ribs, broke his nose, fractured his cheekbone, and some other stuff.

After that I was sent to an orphanage for "troubled youth", this place was worse. They hated the kids there, and anyone sent to a home was likely to encounter what I already had with that other house, so I was stuck. I felt hopeless.

About a week and a half of being there, I got word that my father was scheduled for execution the next day. It wasn't about his death; I was upset, but not enough to kill myself. I just knew my options: his death meant I would be stuck in hell for the next three years. I couldn't escape the situation I was in. So that night, in the bathroom, I figured my best option was to end the suffering then."

Ashley let out a big sigh; Spencer was completely focused on the girl. Ashley seemed to be lost in her memories, almost trapped by them. Spencer did the only thing she could think to do. She slowly lifted her hand to Ashley's face, cupping the girl's cheek and giving her a soft and comforting kiss. Ashley gave a small smile, appreciating the simple action; she found her voice to continue.

"Well, I failed at killing myself. One of the girls found me in the bathroom bleeding, and I was rushed to the hospital. When I woke up, the same agent that led the team to bust my dad was sitting by my bedside. That is when he offered me a position at the agency. He was aware of what my father had taught me over the years, and I guess he found it valuable. So, that is how this all started."

Ashley had been looking down at their entwined hands while finishing the story, and finally chanced a glance to the blonde girl. Her suicide attempt is something she has never spoken of, the CIA never asked, and no one else dared to question her about her personal life. It was a part of her life that she truly regretted, feeling so weak and helpless, and in all honesty pathetic for not being able to pick herself up and work through her issues. Ashley hated feeling weak, and that instance was once of her weakest moments. Ashley mulled over that thought and realized she had a new weakness, one that she would die protecting.

When their eyes finally met, Ashley was shocked to see the soft pride glowing from Spencer's watery ones. Spencer slowly brought her lips to Ashley's, sharing a sweet and loving kiss. "Ash, sometimes I can not believe how strong you truly are. I don't understand how one person could go through so much and still be as amazing as you are. I love you." Ashley and Spencer both blushed at the statement, being one of the first times it was uttered outside the throws of passion. "I really do, and just know you are never going to be alone. You are stuck with me now." Spencer finished, her thumb slowly tracing Ashley's bottom lip.

Ashley was so grateful towards the girl. She knew exactly what to say, what to do to make Ashley feel happy and good. These were feelings Ashley was trying to get use to. She knew that with Spencer in her life, she was guaranteed to experience them often.

But Ashley wasn't going to admit that to the blonde, she already felt like a love-sick sap, so instead Ashley's response was a groan, and when the blonde shot her a glare and a lifted eyebrow Ashley said, "I do not recall signing any contract Spence. I sooo don't want to be stuck with you." Ashley was grinning wickedly, trying to bring a light atmosphere to the air again, while tapping the tip of Spencer's nose.

Spencer couldn't help but laugh at the girl's response. She gave the girl a hard kiss, only breaking it to growl out, "Contract? I'll show you a contract." The brunette only smiled at Spencer before flipping the blonde underneath her.

She took a second to pull away from the girl, staring into her eyes for a moment, before saying, "I love you too Spencer." Spencer looked at the brunette and smiled; instead of the hard kisses she had just been giving the girl, she began to kiss her gently, with such care; kisses that made the brunette's heart flutter and the blonde feel butterflies in her stomach; kisses that can only be shared between two people in love.


	18. Bursting of the Bubble

**Sorry for the delay, new job has been crazy. This is the last of the pre-written chapters, so they might be slower coming out now, but don't worry I still have a lot of story to cover. Sorry if there are errors, I wanted to get this out soon! Thanks for all the reviews and adds, etc. I really love them! **

**Chapter 18: Bursting of the Bubble**

"Black Mamba to Copperhead, come in, I repeat, Black Mamba to Copperhead come in" Spencer whispered into the slumbering brunette's ear before softly biting on the lobe.

Ashley simply groaned in response. Spencer had been sleeping up until three minutes ago, and in those three minutes the brunette had awoken up as well, always acutely aware of the blonde.

But just because Ashley was awake, didn't mean she wanted to open her eyes. The only promising thing in fully waking up is she would get to see Spencer again.

Ashley's eyes fluttered open (not being able to resist looking at the blonde), a small smile on her face as she met the young doctor's own mischievous smile. "How the hell am _I _Copperhead and _you _Black Mamba?" Ashley questioned, amused with Spencer's antics.

"I think it is clear who has the best moves here. Plus I am way more lovable for the fans than you are." Spencer said, giving the girl a cheeky smile.

Ashley smiled back, leaning in for a soft, quick kiss, "Can't argue with that logic." The girls had only drifted into sleep for half an hour. The day had long since passed; it was close to nine o'clock at night. Spencer marveled in how much had happened in only a day. _Seems like a lifetime ago when I was wishing to kiss Ashley_.

And, just because she could, Spencer leaned down for another kiss, this one a little longer, and a little more serious than the last. Before this got too heated, Ashley broke the kiss.

"Spencer, this is a slippery slope. I need nourishment and a long shower before anymore bed time activities." Ashley said, laughing when the blonde gave a little pout.

"Well, if you insist Ashley. But, now that you mention it, you do smell. You should probably shower." Spencer teased, slightly worried at the devilish look in Ashley's eyes.

"Just for that comment, you can't shower with me." And before Spencer could even protest, Ashley had run out of the room, locking herself in the guest bathroom to shower alone. Spencer let out an amused laugh, and made her way to her own shower, having the sudden urge to hose herself off in cold water. _MMM naked Ashley running…_

* * *

Spencer strolled out of her bedroom shortly after her shower. She gulped when she noticed the brunette sitting on the couch in only a tight tank top and her underwear, her wet hair starting to curl already. She was picking at some PopTarts, and smiled when she spotted Spencer.

Spencer had opted to simply wrap the sheet around her body post-shower. She planned to get Ashley back in bed, where clothing was forbidden, shortly after they ate some food.

Spencer and Ashley were stuck in a staring contest, and Ashley felt the need to break the moment, "I thought you were going to shower too. I can smell you from here." Ashley joked, with a small smile on her face. Spencer decided to let that one slide and simply stuck her tongue out at the brunette. Her need for PopTarts was much greater than her need to kick Ashley's ass.

As Spencer sauntered into the kitchen, she noticed the empty box of PopTarts on the counter. She almost gasped in horror when she realized Ashley was eating the last two. Unknown to her, Ashley was intently watching the blonde from her place in the living room.

Ashley wanted to burst out laughing when she saw the horror on the blonde's face. She wasn't particularly fond of the sugary breakfast food, but had come to love them because they reminded her of a certain blonde that was constantly taking over her thoughts. Ashley wasn't as heartless as to eat the last two. She simply hid the last pack, wanting to see Spencer's reaction.

Spencer had a plan, a mission in fact. Seduce Ashley out of those PopTarts. She wanted them and she planned to get them in any way possible. Spencer slowly walked towards the couch, adjusting the sheet that was wrapped around her body. She was swinging her hips and gave Ashley a sexy little smirk as she walked towards her. Ashley simply lifted an eyebrow, as if to say, "bring it on".

Spencer leaned over the back of the couch, moving her face only inches away from the brunette while Ashley slowly pushed the plate of PopTarts away from the girl. Spencer could breathe the girl in, freshly showered and smelling wonderful, in only a way Ashley could manage.

"Ashley, I'd really like those last PopTarts." Spencer stated, her lips lightly grazing Ashley's own. Ashley's eyes closed at the slight contact, loving the fact that she was this close to the girl again. As pathetic as it was, she had missed her during her shower.

Spencer smirked at Ashley, she was totally winning, just to seal the deal, she leaned in, closing the inches that separated them and left a lingering kiss on Ashley's lips while leaning closer to the plate of food. Before she could register what was happening, she found herself on her back on the couch with Ashley on top of her.

Ashley smiled down at the girl, having moved the plate to the coffee table, before flipping their position. She slowly leaned towards the doctor and whispered, "That's too bad Spence because I am not giving them up." She gave Spencer a quick peck before getting up and running from the girl, plate in hand.

Spencer smiled; since seduction didn't work, she would just have to take them. She was quick to get up and chase Ashley. They circled the couch a few times, both smiling at their antics. Spencer's back was towards the door, and the brunette was on the opposite side of the couch.

"Give it up Davies, those PopTarts are mine."

Ashley scoffed and simply replied, "I'd like to see that happen Carlin." And Spencer decided it would best to take the direct approach. She jumped over the arm of the couch and ran across the seats, cutting the distance between the two girls.

Ashley was quick to turn around, but Spencer was much more determined in catching the girl than Ashley was at running away (really, who would want to run away from a nearly naked Spencer?). Spencer grabbed her, pinning her to the wall. Ashley was still holding the plate but was trapped (not that she minded) by Spencer's body. They were both laughing, but when their eyes met things became less funny and more serious in an instant.

Spencer reached up and brushed a stray hair out of the brunette's face. Their eyes were still locked, and Spencer's thumb was softly caressing Ashley's cheek. Spencer was so happy in this very moment she wanted to burst, instead she whispered out, "God, you are so beautiful."

Ashley softly smiled at the girl. If she were to die tomorrow, everything would be worth it. Ashley would easily trade her life for this very moment with Spencer. There is nothing and nowhere that could be better than right now.

"I love you Spencer." Ashley replied with such sincerity that the only way to respond was to kiss her. When Spencer pulled away from the kiss, keeping their foreheads together, Ashley remembered the plate of food she was holding.

"There is another pack of PopTarts in the cabinet. I couldn't do that to you." Ashley informed the blonde, a shy smile making its way onto her face.

Spencer smiled at the brunette. She should have known; Ashley was the most selfless person when it came to anything regarding the blonde. "PopTarts are the last thing on my mind at the moment." Spencer replied, quickly bringing their lips together again.

Spencer's tongue slowly traced Ashley's lower lip before being granted access, deepening the kiss. Ashley's PopTart free hand slowly moved its way up to the knot holding Spencer's sheet together. She was able to loosen it, slowly moving it away, when she heard a noise.

Spencer was stunned when she felt herself being pushed against the wall, behind Ashley, and registered a crashing noise while the front door was being swung open. Ashley had a protective arm pushing Spencer behind her, while her other hand held onto a sharp piece of plate she had broken as a makeshift weapon. Glancing over the brunette's shoulder, both girls realized that Chelsea stood frozen in the doorway, obviously taking in the scantily dressed girls, faces flushed from their previous activities.

Spencer fixed her sheet before stepping in front of her barely dressed spy. _No one gets to see the goods but me_ Spencer thought. Spencer's hands slowly reached down Ashley's own, making her drop the broken piece of ceramic, and giving it a gentle, yet reassuring squeeze.

Spencer looked at her best friend, blushing a little she said, "Hey Chelsea, what brings you by?" Spencer was going for casual, pretending Chelsea didn't just walk in on Ashley getting to second base with her.

"Well, I- uh, wanted to return your car." Chelsea replied, finally finding her words. It would be an understatement to say that Chelsea was shocked at what she found. Last she heard Spencer had gone out on a date with her Ashley all of 9 hours ago, and now Spencer's Ashley and Spencer were doing the nasty against the wall. And what is with Spencer's Ashley and looking like she was going to kill everyone that walked through Spencer's door? But the most pressing question Chelsea had was what the brunette girl had against Spencer's dishes.

Spencer could see all the questions and confusion on her best friend's face, and she could feel her spy nervously shifting behind her, her hand never leaving its place in Spencer's. "Oh, well thanks. Can I, um, call you tomorrow?" Spencer asked, hoping her best friend would let it go for the evening, but she had little hope of that.

Chelsea's eyes finally landed on the brunette, and she had set them to kill. This was the same girl that Spencer was crying about all of last night, the same girl that made both of them drink into a tequila filled stupor, and Chelsea would be damned if she let the brunette just use her friend. Chelsea knew Spencer wanted her to leave, but as a best friend, she had to make sure Spencer was in her right mind.

Chelsea scoffed. "Yea right. Why don't you two put some actual clothes on, and then you and I are having a chat Blondie. I'll be back in 10 minutes. And I am using my key, so don't have sex in the living room or something while I'm gone." Chelsea finished with a small smirk before exiting the apartment to give them a minute to change.

Spencer let out a sigh, and Ashley simply leaned her head forward, resting it on Spencer's shoulder blade. Both of them soon started laughing hysterically at being caught. Finally, when their laughter died down, Ashley placed a small kiss on the blonde's bare shoulder while mumbling out, "Sorry about your plate."

Ashley was able to steady her heartbeat. She was terrified that any moment something could happen to put Spencer in jeopardy. The guilt she felt for dragging Spencer into all of this was too much to bear sometimes, but then she heard the girl's laugh, or thought of her eyes, and she knew that it was something she would have to get over.

Spencer glanced down at the shattered pieces of ceramic. She found it absolutely adorable that Ashley was so protective, but she was going to need a new dining set if the brunette kept it up.

"It's okay Ash." She simply replied turning around and giving the girl a kiss to the temple. Both girls slowly made they way back to the bedroom to put on some clothes, careful to avoid any broken pieces of ceramic.

They slowly began putting on clothing. Ashley laughed at the small pout the blonde was wearing when Ashley pulled on some jeans. Spencer went into the closet, looking for something to wear, and smiled when she noticed Ashley's hoodie safely hanging towards the back. After spotting that, picking her outfit was very easy.

Spencer turned back towards the brunette, and noticed her looking down at her hand. She had a cut from breaking the plate. "Oh Ash." Spencer simply said, making her way towards the girl.

Spencer ushered her into the bathroom, and put her hand under running water to wash the blood away. Spencer silently made the brunette sit on the edge of the tub, while she knelt in front of her, cleaning the cut, and placing a small band-aid over it. Ashley gave a half smile when she noticed the Disney Princess band-aid covering her injury. Spencer leaned down and placed a tender kiss on Ashley's palm.

Spencer looked up at the girl, her hands resting on Ashley's thighs, softly rubbing them to try and soothe the girl. "Ashley, I know this is scary, and I know you are worried about me, about us, and our safety. But you can't let this guilt, this fear take over. Because if you do, I'll lose you, and that would hurt more than anyone ever could. I promise. I'm scared too, but it's you and me, together. Okay?" The brunette looked down at the girl; she loved that Spencer knew. Spencer was inside her head like no one else had ever been. Ashley whispered out an "okay" and gave the girl a light kiss.

The girls heard the front door open and close again: Chelsea had returned. Ashley stood up and Spencer followed suit. The blonde wrapped her arms around Ashley's neck, while Ashley's arms wound around Spencer's waist. They allowed themselves a small moment together. Chelsea's presence meant the end of their exclusive bubble they had created in the last few hours. The girls had confronted one another, and now it was time to take on the rest of the world. With their bodies still pressed together Spencer whispered, "Well I think I have to face her."

Ashley looked at the blue-eyed girl with a little apprehension, "You don't regret anything right?"

Spencer smiled at the girl, giving her a soft kiss, "I already told you Davies, you are stuck with me; we have a contract and everything. You better learn how to be a plumber and start eating beef jerky."

Ashley let out a small laugh before placing a gentle kiss to the girl's head. "Do you want me to stay with you when you guys talk?" She asked, slightly terrified of the idea of having to face the blonde's best friend. Ashley was positive she wasn't on her favorite persons list.

Spencer immediately knew the answer to that, "No, she wouldn't stand for it anyways. It won't be so bad, she just wants to make sure I know what I am doing."

Ashley let out a small sigh of relief. She looked at the blonde girl, and was met with those glowing blue eyes that she has come to love so much, with one final kiss, the two made their way out of the bedroom, so Spencer could have her talk with Chelsea.

Chelsea was seated on the couch, impatiently fidgeting with Spencer's keys. Chelsea looked up at the girls, her left eyebrow shooting up when she noticed their clasped hands. Spencer let go of Ashley's hand and plopped down on the couch.

Ashley gave a sheepish smile while greeting Chelsea. Chelsea gave her a cool head nod and a "Spencer's Ashley" in return. Spencer wanted to laugh at the uncomfortable brunette, but held back as to not make the situation worse.

"Well then, I am just going to get out of here and let you two talk." Ashley finally said. She gave Chelsea one last smile, and then glanced at the blonde. She was a little unsure what to do here; she was never one for PDA, (Ashley was a firm believer that no one should see what she looks like kissing unless they were receiving the kiss) but every cell in her body yelled at her to give Spencer any sort of goodbye.

Ashley placed a hand on the girl's shoulder and gave it a small squeeze, Spencer covered Ashley's hand with her own, returning the gesture. They both gave each other a dopey smile, and finally Spencer said, "I'll find you when we are done."

Ashley held Spencer's gaze for a moment longer, conveying her love for the girl and her apprehension at leaving, but eventually the brunette turned around, grabbing her leather jacket, and was out the door. Spencer's eyes never left Ashley's form until the front door closed behind her.

Spencer was snapped out of her daze when Chelsea gave her a loving slap upside the head.

"What. The. Hell." Chelsea asked, a small smirk playing on her lips and a look of distrust in her eyes. Spencer gave her friend a sheepish smile, but before she could explain, Chelsea cut her off again.

"Okay, I am straight and even I know your Ashley is all kinds of hot, but wasn't that the girl you were crying over not even 24 hours ago, and wasn't that the girl that stomped on your heart, and wasn't that the girl we were setting you up on a blind date to try and forget about?"

Spencer sighed. It really did feel like another lifetime ago; Spencer smiled at the thought. "First Chelsea, your Ashley really, _really_ sucks. Like she was shallow, vapid, and all around terrible."

"Spence, I wasn't expecting you two to fall in love, I was just trying to get you laid, I mean come on, when was the last time you had sex- wait, don't answer that."

Spencer merely smirked at her friend; _damn I already miss Ashley_ Spencer couldn't help but think as she recalled the last time she had sex. Spencer began blushing at the thought, and Chelsea, being the true best friend she was, laughed and pointed at the blushing blonde.

"Shut up Chels." Spencer mumbled out. "Anyways. Last night after I left your place, I went and hung out at the baseball diamond with Henry." Chelsea scowled a little, remembering Spencer's headless friend, but the blonde continued on, "And Ashley came and found me. Things are fairly hazy from last night, but Ashley took care of me, and I said a lot of embarrassing things, I even told her about the date with your Ashley.

Anyways in the morning I woke up and we got into this huge fight about my date, and I basically told her she broke my heart and I was trying to figure out how to move on. Then she got so sad and apologized. And when I was at work she had put a hangover kit in my bag! Anyways, I went on the date, and had a terrible time, and then I came home and my Ashley was here and looked so, so nervous."

Spencer took a deep breath. There was no way she could convey all the words Ashley had given to her earlier today. It was something special and sacred between them, and even if Spencer could word it exactly the way Ashley had, she would never repeat them to anyone other than Ashley herself. Spencer looked at her best friend, she was eager to hear the rest, and honestly Spencer couldn't blame her. _Imagine if Chelsea knew the WHOLE story_.

"Anyways, she had this big long speech waiting for me, and she just said the most beautiful things. She basically told me that your Ashley wasn't good enough for me, and neither was she but despite that she loved me." Spencer smiled, she was sure she would never get over the joy she felt every time she remembered Ashley loved her.

Chelsea studied her friend. She was obviously reliving the moment, her blue eyes had a particular shine to them, and she had this quiet, small smile playing on her lips. It was clear to Chelsea that the young doctor was deliriously happy with the change of events, but Chelsea was still a bit worried.

"Spence, that is great, I am really happy for you, but are you sure? I mean this girl crushed you. Do you even know what changed her mind even?"

Spencer paused to think for a moment, she wasn't sure what had made the brunette change her mind over the situation. She also couldn't tell Chelsea that Ashley was trying to protect her from the CIA.

"Um, well, I am not sure why she changed her mind, I suppose because of my date with your Ashley. But, she did tell me why she denied me yesterday. She was trying to protect me from, um, herself. She is kind of in a weird life place right now, what with getting fired, and stuff. And she hasn't really ever had a relationship before. I think she was just worried for me." It was a bunch on half truths that Spencer hoped would convey part of Ashley's logic.

Chelsea only nodded her head; Spencer could tell her friend was not truly convinced that this relationship was a good thing. Spencer knew without doubt that this was one of the best things to ever happen to her, and she wished she could show that to Chelsea

Spencer reached out, covering her hand over her friend's. "Chelsea, I know you are worried about this, and if I was in your position I would be too, but please believe me when I tell you Ashley is a good person, a person that only wants what is best for me. But in all honesty, I am so head over heels in love with her that it doesn't matter."

Chelsea smiled are her friend, she could see the sincerity in her eyes, so she decided to be supportive. "So what happens now with you two?"

Spencer smiled, but it soon faltered, "Um, I'm not sure, we, um hadn't exactly gotten around to talking about practical stuff." Spencer was blushing again, and again Chelsea was laughing.

"Well, damn girl, I guess if the person I loved made a speech to me about how much he loved me, we wouldn't be talking either." Spencer's blush was still in place, but she appreciated Chelsea's efforts to make her feel better.

"I don't know Chelsea; I don't know if she is going to move here, or leave, or anything really. All I know is that I love her- like I hear good news I want to celebrate with her, love her. Or when we go to parties I want to fill up her cup, love her. It is serious Chels, like if she ate my last PopTarts I wouldn't be mad at her, love her."

Chelsea's eyes widened at the last statement; Spencer was kind of psycho about her PopTarts. "Oh shit Spence. This is serious."

Spencer could only smile, "Yea it is."

"So, would you like, move away from here with her?" Chelsea asked, a little hesitant, and worried. She didn't want to lose her best friend, but she would support her.

Spencer gave her friend a sympathetic look. They had been friends for too long to not understand one another. "I don't know Chelsea, I haven't really thought about it. But don't worry; you are my number one girl. My Ashley is cool and all, but you and me, we were made for each other."

Chelsea smiled at her friend. While she knew it was a huge downplay of emotions for a certain brunette, Chelsea knew Spencer meant the words behind them. She could also tell that Spencer would follow Ashley to the ends of the Earth if she asked her to. But that is okay. Chelsea was genuinely happy for Spencer, and even for Ashley.

"Enough Carlin, time for the most serious question: How's the sex?" Spencer couldn't help, but laugh at her best friend's question. It served as a perfect distraction to all the questions her chat with Chelsea had brought up about her own future.

While nothing seemed to be resolved, and Spencer still had no clue what changed Ashley's mind, or what Ashley's plans were now, or even if Spencer could ever be truthful with her friends and family, she knew this was right, that Ashley was right. As long as Spencer had Ashley, everything else didn't seem to matter.


	19. Finding Center Field

**Chapter 19: Finding Center Field**

In the years that followed Ashley joining the CIA, the brunette had lost touch with a number of things. Movies and television basically disappeared from her life; pop culture that thrived in the world around her didn't touch Ashley. Besides books, there was one luxury Ashley allowed herself: music.

Growing up, both her parents had been huge music fans, from Classical like Mozart and Chopin to rock and pop like The Beatles and The Supremes. Ashley had so many memories of her and her mother dancing in the kitchen while preparing a meal, or little Ashley sneaking out of her room to find her parents slow dancing in their living room.

After her mother's death, Ashley's life had been filled with such solitude her only friend and refuge was music. She spent hours prior to missions, while traveling, when reading, just to relax, listening to music. She was open to most things, having a fairly diverse taste, but it was a simple comfort that had remained over the years.

So when Ashley left Spencer's apartment, she soon found herself sitting on the bleachers that over looked the baseball field listening to her iPod. So much had happened to the poor brunette in the last two weeks, it was nice to sit and simply collect herself, if only for a moment.

The more the brunette reflected the more she realized everything that has happened in her life, all the pain, the sorrow, the isolation, has been worth it since it led her to Spencer. Ashley knew Spencer was it, forever, and Ashley would do anything to ensure Spencer got to keep her forever.

Chelsea's arrival served to shatter the carefree and untouchable world that was created in Spencer's bed, and allowed for worrisome thoughts to seep in. There were a million questions that the girls needed to figure out, logistics to think about, and (what Ashley was most concerned over) the blonde's safety. Ashley could only hope the blonde's chat with her best friend wouldn't make her reconsider their relationship.

Ashley enjoyed the slight chill in the air while Leona Naess crooned into her ear. The small town was quiet, as it was every night past 8 o'clock. It was peaceful, and beautiful, with all the stars shining brightly above, but Ashley missed Spencer. It was pathetic and weak and a number of other adjectives Ashley hated, but still couldn't deter her from longing for the blonde.

The brunette didn't have to suffer long as she heard and felt the blonde's presence. She tried to suppress her smile, but failed miserably.

Spencer had finally satisfied her friend enough for Chelsea to depart for the evening. Spencer felt like she was crawling out of her skin because she was so anxious to find her spy. The blonde had contemplated calling her phone, but decided there was no fun in that. Surprisingly, or not surprising at all, Spencer was able to find Ashley in the first place she checked.

The brunette looked beautiful, staring out at the field, surrounded by the pale moonlight. The sight made Spencer's heart race; she could hardly believe that Ashley was hers. She had to fight the urge to run over to the bleachers. Spencer plopped down on the seat next to Ashley. The blonde straddled the bleacher staring at the brunette, while Ashley continued to look onto the field. The small smile on Ashley's face informed the blonde the girl was aware of her presence.

Spencer gave one of the ear buds a small tug. She checked the song, nodding her head in approval and continued looking at the brunette, completely content in just being near Ashley.

Despite Ashley's amazing peripheral vision, she desperately wanted to turn towards Spencer, but didn't, terrified she would see regret, fear, heartbreak in the blue eyes. Finally, Ashley had to break the silence:

"Talk with Chelsea?"

"Yup."

"Does she approve?"

"Nope."

"Think she will tell the others?"

"Definitely."

"Does she hate me?"

"Probably."

"Did the talk, uh, change anything, I mean, between us?"

Spencer smiled and scooted closer to the brunette, hating the small space between them. Both Spencer's knees pressed into Ashley's side. The blonde wrapped her arms around the girl's waist, resting her chin on Ashley's shoulder.

"Never." Spencer whispered into the girl's ear, placing a small kiss on her cheek. Both girls sighed at the contact, a sense of relief flooding through them. Ashley finally shifted her head, allowing herself to look at the blonde. The brunette dipped her head down a little giving Spencer a light kiss.

Ashley was grateful for the solitude; spending time alone with Spencer had easily become one of Ashley's favorite things.

"Love me?"

"Always."

Ashley had to lean in to give the blonde another kiss. Both girls pulled away with smiles on their faces. Ashley moved to stand, but Spencer tugged on her hand, "Let's go to our spot."

Ashley gave Spencer a quizzical look, and Spencer simply replied, "You know where." And with that the brunette pulled the blonde up and led her to the middle of the baseball field, exactly where Ashley had found a drunk Spencer, not very long ago.

* * *

The girls were comfortably lying on the grass- well, Ashley was lying on the grass and Spencer was directly on top of her. It was Spencer's effort to keep the brunette warm. Spencer's chin was resting on Ashley's chest, while the brunette had her arms wrapped around her waist, slipping her hands under Spencer's layers to softly stroke the bare skin.

It was a beautiful night out, but Spencer was freezing. Ashley had noticed the blonde's shivers during their walk to the field, and simply removed her jacket and wrapped it around the girl. Spencer could only smile at the action. The blonde wanted to ensure Ashley's warmth, so Spencer decided to be Ashley's personal blanket for the evening.

Ashley laughed. "Spencer, you have to stop squirming around." She said, with laughter still in her eyes. While Spencer was truly devoted to keeping her girl warm, she was having trouble finding the perfect position.

"Fine." Spencer huffed out, finally settling down. She placed a light kiss on Ashley's collarbone. The girls had been silent, both knowing and avoiding the talk that needed to occur. There was so much to say, but seemingly, no place to start.

Ashley wasn't good at this; the opening up, communicating, whatever it is that needed to happen right now, because she never had a reason to in the past. But Ashley was trying: trying to be the person Spencer deserved, trying to change her bad habits, trying to break what 20 years of isolation had created.

She could tell Spencer was a little anxious after her chat with Chelsea, it was evident in her eyes, but Spencer was holding back for the sake of the brunette. While Ashley appreciated Spencer trying to protect her from being overwhelmed with relationship stuff, Ashley wasn't going to let Spencer worry about it all night.

Ashley sighed, tightening her grip on the blonde. _It's now or never. Start with baby steps. God, when did I get this lame? _Ashley couldn't help but think.

"So did Chelsea mention if she was coming to the BBQ tomorrow?" Ashley asked, a little hesitant, trying to open the door for a discussion.

Spencer laughed, and Ashley smiled because she liked feeling Spencer's body shake against her own. "Chelsea hasn't missed an opportunity to eat Dad's food for as long as I can remember. So, yea, she will be there- wait, how did you know about the BBQ? Is that another spy thing?" Spencer asked, smile and head tilt in place.

Despite spending the better part of the day with the girl, Ashley was only now realizing how little they had talked about their current situation. Granted, a lot of that time was spent, well, not talking, but when the girls did talk they had focused on their pasts, or on silly, light things like fake futures, arguments about music's best decade, and how the book should never be replaced by anything with a screen.

Spencer didn't know about Ashley's run in with the older male Carlin, hell Ashley didn't even know how the date with Stupid Ashley went, for all she knew they could be seeing each other again. Ashley smirked at the thought; _I seriously doubt that_.

"Oh, I- well, when you were on your date" Spencer slightly cringed at the mention of the horrible date, and Chelsea's Ashley, "I ran into your dad. Or more like, he saw me wallowing in a corner and came over to talk to me."

Spencer smiled at the thought of her father and her Ashley running into each other and chatting; it seemed so normal.

"Wallowing, huh?" Spencer said, a small smirk on her face as she placed a tender kiss on the girl's neck.

"Yea, wallowing." Ashley said, a wide grin in place, "Stubbed my toe."

Spencer couldn't help but laugh at the response. "Well, what words of insight did my father pass on to get you through the terrible ordeal?"

Ashley smiled at the thought. Arthur had been the shove in the right direction for Ashley and for that, she would forever be grateful. "He told me that life is only worth living if you take the risk to fall in love. Smart guy, your dad."

Spencer released a sigh of relief; at least she knew the answer to one question. It seems her dad was a major factor in helping Ashley admit her feelings. _Looks like I have to bake the old man a cake_ Spencer fondly thought.

"He can't be that smart; I have no idea how that advice helps with a stubbed toe." Ashley only rolled her eyes at the girl's response. Comments like that made Ashley positive that she could not love the blonde anymore than she already did.

Spencer laid her head down on Ashley's chest. She liked hearing the girl's rapid heartbeat thudding against her ear. The blonde adjusted herself a little more, trying to ensure that she really was keeping Ashley warm with her own body. Spencer may not be able to protect Ashley from the CIA, but she could keep the girl warm.

Spencer was worried. Nothing was certain between the two girls other than the fact that they loved one another. Spencer wished for a world in which that would be all that mattered. Ashley's soft fingertips on her back were soothing, offering the blonde comfort amidst all uncertainty.

Spencer was smart; she realized Ashley had extended a proverbial branch, offering Spencer an opening to discuss everything that needed to be discussed. Spencer had wanted to discuss their relationship the second she saw the brunette, but had held back, not wanting to scare the emotionally damaged girl. Spencer understood this was a huge step for Ashley, and while she was worried and curious, she cared more about Ashley's feelings and wellbeing.

"I've, uh, he actually sort of figured out about you. I didn't tell him, he kind of guessed, but he knows you aren't a computer programmer." Spencer admitted, slightly worried the brunette would be upset with her.

Ashley smiled at the nervous blonde, "Yea, I know, he mentioned that he figured something out. He saw one of my bullet wounds. But thanks for telling him I'm one of the good guys."

Spencer let out a sigh of relief, "Well, he probably won't think that if he finds out we spent the better part of today being naked in my bedroom."

Ashley laughed. It was bad enough that Chelsea knew that information, let alone Spencer's father. The blonde let out another sigh, and Ashley gave her hip a light squeeze, silently requesting an explanation.

"I just hate lying to them. I never have lied to them, especially Chelsea, and now I feel like I have to lie about this huge part of my life. I love you, everything about you, including your crazy spy life, and I wish they could know that. But I understand that they can't."

It was Ashley's turn to sigh. Ashley hated all the complications that she was bringing into Spencer's life. The brunette brought a hand up to gently run her fingers through the blonde's hair while placing a delicate kiss to the top of the girl's head.

"I know Spence. I am so sorry that you have to lie, but it is for their safety, my safety, and your safety. Maybe one day, years from now, we can tell them the entire truth, but right now, it just can't happen. It just seems bad now, eventually, we won't need to talk about my past at all and then there won't be reason to lie anymore. Your family just needs to get to know me."

Spencer wasn't sure what made her happier, the idea of ending all the lies with her family or Ashley's mention of their shared future. Despite their confessions of love, Spencer was still giddy every time she remembered Ashley wanted Spencer as a part of her life. It seemed too good to be true.

Ashley could feel the small smile on Spencer's face. The brunette was glad she could ease the blonde's pain about lying to her family. "In the mean time, we have got to get you better at lying." Ashley joked, laughing only when the blonde let out a gasp of horror.

"I am not a bad liar!"

Ashley's hand stilled in Spencer's hair, "Oh really? Me being an uninsured, hit and run victim that you sneak into hospitals for medical care is a good lie?"

Spencer laughed a little and bashfully replied, "Shut up! I slipped up and Chelsea caught me off guard! Plus I was trying to wrap my head around the hot ex-spy I had prancing around my apartment!"

Ashley had a huge smile on her face and simply returned to running her fingers through Spencer's hair, choosing not to reply. Her smile got even larger when she heard Spencer mumble out a small "jerk".

They were silent for a few minutes, each enjoying the other's company, neither in a rush to leave the haven they had created on the baseball field.

After counting 365 of Ashley's heartbeats, Spencer finally broke down and asked the question both girls were waiting to hear answered: "So, what now?"

Ashley took a moment to think about how to answer this question, but soon realized the answer was fairly simple. "Well, whatever you want."

Spencer was a little shocked at the brunette's response. It was rare for the brunette to do something without some sort of plan in mind, so for her to offer Spencer complete control was surprising. Spencer sat up, effectively straddling Ashley. She wanted to be able to look at the girl's face when they were having this conversation.

Spencer's head tilted to the side slightly when she asked, "What do you mean, 'Whatever you want'?"

Ashley sat up as well, her body immediately missing the warmth her "blanket" had provided. Ashley tucked some of the blonde hair behind Spencer's ear.

"Well, what I mean is, we can do whatever you want. Move to Sri Lanka and drink out of coconuts on the beach, or go to London and watch the rain fall while you write your next novel, or even go hang out with the Canadians and become fans of hockey and maple syrup.

What I meant is, I will do anything you want to do. As long as I am with you, I will do it and be happy doing it. Like I said, I have some money saved, you wouldn't have to work if you didn't want to. We can go anywhere. I just want you."

Spencer smiled and blushed at the girl's words. Ashley's eyes were brightly shining, and Spencer wished she could freeze this moment forever. Her girl was just so beautiful and perfect in every way. Spencer leaned in wrapping her arms around Ashley's neck and gave the girl a kiss. It had seemed like an eternity since they last did that.

Spencer slowly pulled away knowing what she really wanted to do with Ashley shouldn't be done in public. She rested her forehead against the brunette's and stole another light kiss before pulling back to finish their conversation.

"Anywhere?" Spencer asked, her mind reeling at the possibilities.

"Anywhere." Ashley answered with a small nod of her head. She loved seeing Spencer mull over her options- their options.

Spencer fidgeted a little nervously on Ashley's lap. She was ecstatic that Ashley basically declared that she was in this relationship, that she wanted a relationship with Spencer. And while Spencer already knew this, she wasn't sure what that would mean in regards to Ashley's new CIA predicament. But Ashley wanted Spencer; wanted her in a way that meant living together, even better than that, wanted her in a way that said forever. Spencer's heart fluttered at the thought. She would easily give Ashley her forever if that is what the brunette wanted.

But what made her nervous was how Spencer planned to respond to Ashley's plan to go anywhere in the world.

"Well- um, if we can go anywhere, like anywhere to live, is it, um, possible that we stay here?" Ashley couldn't help but smile at the blonde, but Spencer didn't notice the kind look in the girl's eyes, so she continued to ramble. "I love you, and I love the idea of going all over the world with you, but I love living so close to my family. And as much as you joke, I like my little job at the paper, and putting band-aids on the local kids and being able to walk everywhere in this town. I mean we could go on a long extended vacation or something, but could this be, like home? We can go once you get all settled, it seems like a good idea for you to have a place that feels like home too and I just think-"

Ashley ended Spencer's misery by giving her a passionate and loving kiss. Ashley couldn't help herself. Rambling Spencer was one of her favorite things, and it was very entertaining to watch how far the girl would go, but Ashley wanted to reassure the blonde she really did mean she would go anywhere for Spencer, even if that meant not going anywhere at all.

The girls pulled away and Spencer said with a small smile gracing her lips, "I was sort of talking there."

"I know. I was sort of shutting you up." Spencer could only giggle in response, pulling Ashley's body impossibly closer to her own.

"I might have to ramble more often then."

"Please don't; my ears can't take it." Ashley teasingly replied. "But I just needed you to stop so I could tell you we can stay here. But if there is the slightest chance of anyone catching wind of me or us, I am going to have to leave. I refuse to let you get hurt. I can leave and come back when things cool down."

"No way. If you leave, I am coming in your suitcase. No leaving me. If we have to leave, for whatever reason, we will do it together." Spencer replied, firm in her decision to keep them together. Ashley wasn't the only one willing to go anywhere for their relationship.

Ashley smiled at the girl. She hoped that was a situation that they wouldn't have to deal with.

"Ash, are you sure it's okay if we stay here? It's just, you know, my dad and brothers and Chels. If we can't or you don't want to, tell me, we can figure it out."

"No, Spence, here is perfect. I still need to go back to L.A. for a few things, and loose ends, but then I can come back and find a place here and everything."

Spencer was a little shocked at the brunette's words, "Find a place? You aren't going to stay with me? I mean, move in permanently in my apartment?" Spencer could hardly remember what living in that apartment without Ashley was like. And the idea of Ashley living in this town and not sharing the same bed with her sounded like torture.

Ashley looked at the girl, somewhat surprised. She assumed Spencer would want to take this slowly, let her family get use to the idea of the two of them together. Ashley was trying to give Spencer some space, but Ashley was happy to hear the blonde hated that idea.

"I, uh, well I thought that maybe you'd want space, or that you wanted some time for your family to get use to us being together. I just didn't want to rush you." Ashley replied, a little shy at having to explain herself.

Spencer let out a little laugh. "Ash, I am straddling you in the middle of a baseball field after spending an entire day in bed with you. The last thing I want is space between you and me. And honestly, I don't care what my family thinks about you moving in. I love you, and so will they. I just- I don't want you to leave."

Ashley smiled at that, replying with a small, "okay." Both girls were smiling goofily at one another. It had been a good conversation, one in which their future together seemed so tangible and real.

Both girls imagined taking a step like moving in together, committing themselves to someone else would be terrifying, but it felt strangely right. Neither girl had lived with anyone else, but neither girl had ever felt like this before either. Excitement trumped fear.

Spencer felt a slight shiver run up the brunette's body and noticed the small goose bumps on the girl's arms.

"Let's go home Ash."

Ashley's smile got wider, "Yea, let's go home."

As the girls got up, brushing small pieces of grass off one another, and after a small argument over who would wear Ashley's jacket back to the apartment, the girls began their walk home, hand in hand.

"So when are we going to L.A. Ash?"

Ashley's head whipped toward Spencer. "_We_? I don't think so: me. It is way too dangerous for you and I to go there when I plan on breaking into my old place."

"You aren't going alone. I am not sitting here waiting for you."

"Well there is no way you are coming."

The two had stopped their walk and were squaring off with one another, neither feeling mad at the other, but both standing their ground. Spencer realized this was a fight that could wait until they both got a decent amount of sleep and a real meal.

Spencer smiled softly at Ashley, grabbing her hand again, and placing a soft kiss on her cheek. "Let's discuss this later" she said, and Ashley agreed, knowing it was something that could wait.

They finally made their way back to their apartment. After getting a meal, changing into pj's, and quickly loosing their sleepwear because of a series of kisses that led to something more, the girls were finally resting in bed. Spencer was curled right into the brunette while Ashley held the blonde tightly in her arms. Spencer's hand was slowly stroking Ashley's arm, trying to soothe her racing heartbeat.

With whispered I love you's the two finally gave in to sleep, having fought it for hours knowing that little could be better than being awake in the other's presence.

* * *

"Ashley. Assssshhhhhlllllleeeeyyyy." Spencer quietly murmured, trying to wake the slumbering brunette. She delicately gave the girl's ear a kiss before she bit her ear lobe.

It was close to 5 in the morning. Ashley and Spencer had been sleeping for a little more than four and a half hours, which was more than either girl had slept in over 24 hours. But Spencer was wide-awake after the dream she had just had.

The brunette only let out a small grunt, indicating that she was awake, the small smile on her mouth let the blonde know she wasn't as grumpy as her response made her out to be.

"Wake up, I have to tell you about my dream." Spencer said, a little giddy at the thought of getting to talk to Ashley again.

Ashley slowly opened her eyes; they were a warm brown, darkened with sleep. Spencer greeted her with a light peck, smiling into the kiss.

"You are going to kill me Carlin" Ashley joked. Spencer gave the girl a little pout and Ashley could only laugh, her hand coming up to brush some wayward hair out of the blonde's face.

"Fine, fine. What was your dream about?"

Spencer's gave the girl a huge smile and launched into her story, "Well I was in this field, it was made out of cotton candy, and all the trees tops were made out of Dots, which is weird because you know I HATE Dots. And you there and you were…"

And as Spencer continued to retell her dream to Ashley, Ashley listened to every word, including the ones about Jell-O pools and talking Swiss cheese. Ashley listened like they were the most precious words in the world because both girls knew that these small moments, during late nights and early mornings, when they were together, were the moments that a person lives for.

* * *

**Sorry for the delay guys! The story has a lot left; we haven't even touched the CIA stuff! So bear with me as I try to write and manage my jobs! As always thank you for the reviews, adds, etc! **

**Rachel2020: **Wow, thanks so much for the long, nice review! It was very sweet, and I am glad that you enjoy my writing; it means a lot to hear. I am glad you see the complicity in the two characters, and everything it means for them to be in love! Thanks again! Ps. Who are you on twitter? I can follow you too! #southofnowheremovie

**2bz2breading**: Thanks for the review! I am glad you liked the scar game, its one of my favorites to play!

**LoLo06: **Glad you love it love it love it, etc! Hopefully those answered some of the questions Chelsea brought up! I hope to get the next update up sooner! Thanks for the review!

**Hotcutii3**: Glad you like the story and you think its original! I will try to keep it up. Thx for the review!

**Mb168:** Haha, sorry I scared you away with the title, it is the title of a song, but I am glad you gave the story a shot! Thank you for reviewing!

**Miss Davies: **While Chelsea interrupted some good stuff, I think their little sex haze needed to end sooner or later. Plus a true best friend always ruins those kinds of moments, lol. Also, if you had a naked Spencer or Ashley in your bed, wouldn't you spend all your time there too haha. Thanks for the review!

**Brucas4ever: **Glad you think Chelsea is a good friend. I am trying to make her as likable as possible. Thanks for your review

**LoveAsh87**: Glad you love my Spencer and Ashley. I really wanted to convey how much they feel for each other in this, so I am glad you can tell. Thanks you for your responses!

**Elly1212: **Thank you so much! Don't worry there is more story, and I have a pretty good idea where it is going. I really want Chelsea to know the whole truth, but I don't think it is going to happen, at least not now…. Thanks for your review!

**Miss Nowhere:** I don't know how unexpected I will be, but I sure will try to shock a few of you guys! Thanks for reviewing!

**.Dreams: **So happy I could be your finals celebration (by the way congrats on finishing those). Not quite happily ever after, but at least Spashley will deal with it together! Thx for reviewing!

**FFReviews: **You feel like that because it is totally true. Drama here we come. Also thank you for your kind words.

**N: **I am glad that you love how they are with one another. I always thought the best relationships were those that know how to balance the serious and the goofy in such a perfect way. Thanks for the nice review!

**Godlove: **Thank you! I hope to get the next one up a little faster!

**Imaferrari: **I missed your review on the last chapter, but it is okay because you leave such great and lengthy reviews, I really do love them! Thank you so much for the kind words, and I am glad you know this kind of love happens, don't worry I am sure you will find it again soon. Just know I am pretty much in love with you from your reviews alone. Thank you for ALL your kind words.

**Superles: **Thank you so much! I appreciate the review, and I hope you continue to like every chapter!

**Hptriospashley: **I love a fanfiction in which we get to see Spashley together, so don't worry, from here on out they are stuck with each other. Thank you for the review!

**Motoklaxon: **Wow thank you for the kind words! I am glad you fell in love with the story! Hopefully I can keep up the good work!


	20. Pandora's Box

**Hello all, shorter than normal, but I wanted to get something out! Enjoy, and thanks for the add's and reviews, they help so much!**

**Chapter 20: Pandora's Bo**x

Spencer groaned when the chirping outside her window became unbearable. Apparently there was a giant bird singing the world's most obnoxious song with a megaphone outside her house. Needless to say, Spencer was a little sleepy this morning. But then the blonde remembered a certain naked brunette she was sharing a bed with. Spencer's arm went flailing around, only to find empty space next to her. Another groan.

Spencer finally opened her eyes and saw that her favorite spy was not in bed with her. She looked at the clock and it read 10:47. Spencer began to stretch; her body was feeling a little sore from all the, um, activities Ashley and her engaged in yesterday.

Spencer got up and wrapped the sheet around her body so she could search for her missing brunette. As she padded out of her bedroom, she came across a sight that made her heart flutter.

Ashley was seated at the IKEA dining table, a cute frown of concentration on her face as she read on her laptop. The girl had obviously been up for some time. She was freshly showered, drinking a steaming cup of coffee, and had already conquered the newspaper that was lying on the table. The brunette looked up and got a glimpse of Spencer.

Ashley's smile was huge when she saw the blonde padding out of the bedroom, clad in only a sheet, bed head in place, and sleepy little smile on her face. Spencer walked over to Ashley and plopped down in her lap, her face instantly nuzzling into Ashley's neck.

"Morning" the blonde mumbled out, placing a delicate kiss on the girl's neck. Ashley lifted Spencer's face and stole a quick kiss on the lips from the girl.

"MMM good morning sleepy." Ashley was ecstatic Spencer had finally woken up. She had been awake for a couple of hours and had to get out of bed for fear of waking up the poor girl because she missed her/was bored without her.

"How long have you been up?" Spencer asked, while grabbing the cup of coffee on the table.

"A couple of hours, your weird dream gave me weird dreams." Ashley replied, watching as the blonde took a sip of her coffee and grimaced at the bitter taste. Ashley chuckled at the blonde's face.

"I can't believe you drink it black." Spencer said, pushing the coffee far away.

"Let me get you one," Ashley said, still slightly laughing, but before she could move to get up, the blonde settled further into the girl and shook her head no. Ashley looked at Spencer, raising her eyebrow in question.

Spencer simply replied, "It can wait." She grabbed the morning paper, while still seated in Ashley's lap, and let the brunette get back to her computer. Spencer had glanced at it and noticed the CIA seal on the top of the PDF; she would ask Ashley after she had a shower and caffeine in her system.

The girls were quiet for some time. Ashley was unconsciously stroking the blonde's bare leg as she read the top-secret documents, and Spencer may have taken more time (a substantial amount more) than normal to read the small local paper.

Spencer finally couldn't squeeze anything else out of the paper and reluctantly got out of Ashley's lap. It was totally worth moving because the cute frown on Ashley's face from the lack of contact. Before Ashley could say anything, Spencer gave her a peck on the lips and told the girl she was going to hop in the shower.

As Spencer was walking through the doorway she called out over her shoulder, "And when I get back, we are totally discussing your weird dreams!"

Ashley only shook her head and smiled. That girl was all sorts of crazy.

* * *

Spencer emerged from her room, freshly showered and dressed in her typical attire, jeans and a t-shirt. Ashley was in the same spot she had left her, seated at the IKEA table, computer open, with a small frown of concentration on her face. What had changed were the two steaming plates of breakfast and Spencer's favorite UCLA coffee mug waiting for her.

Ashley looked up and gave the girl a nose-crinkling smile. She slowly closed her computer and pushed the chair out that was meant for Spencer.

The blonde made her way over and sank into her seat. She took a sip of her coffee and thanked the gods for creating such a beverage.

"Thank you for breakfast Ash, this looks great." Spencer said, giving the brunette's leg a light squeeze in appreciation.

"Yea, if it was up to you, we'd be living off of PopTarts. I'm trying to keep you alive here."

"Hey! I resent that! I know you were worried about my nutrition, thus why I purchased the strawberry PopTarts; that is totally fruit!" Spencer responded, thinking she had a fairly decent argument.

Ashley simply rolled her eyes knowing there would be no way to break the girl of her love for the breakfast treat.

The two ate their breakfast with light conversation ranging from Ashley's dreams to the BBQ that afternoon. Spencer placed her empty coffee mug on the table and looked at Ashley.

"So what's happening in the CIA world?" Spencer asked, a little nervous because it was the first time she had directly approached the subject with Ashley. Here and there Ashley would mention everything was fine, but they never went into detail about the happenings of the organization, but now, with all that has happened, Spencer realized the CIA had such a large hand in their collective future.

Ashley's eyes flicked to the laptop and back to Spencer. She gave the young doctor a soft smile. "Nothing worth mentioning in regards to them finding out about me. So far, so good on that front." Ashley replied while lightly covering Spencer's hand with her own.

Ashley found it terribly difficult to eat breakfast with Spencer without some sort of physical contact, and she had finally given in to her desires. It was a relief to both girls, even though it was such a small act. Sometimes it felt as though there was a magnetic pull that forced them to be as close as they could manage.

Spencer turned her hand upward, lacing their fingers together and gave the spy a light squeeze. "If there is nothing to worry about, why did you have the cute little monkey face going?" Spencer had noticed Ashley's look of concern and concentration when reading the documents, and it was rare when the girl openly showed those feelings.

Ashley released a small sigh, "It has nothing to do with me Spence, I promise. I wouldn't lie to you about something that important.

There was an announcement that the man that brought me into the CIA has died. The official statement stated it was a heart attack, but from various emails and gossip within the L.A. branch, it might have been a murder."

"Ash, I'm sorry. Were you two close?"

"No. Not really, I suppose that isn't what is bothering me. There seems to be a strange string of events happening and I can't quite figure out the link between them all."

Spencer shot the girl a head tilt, "What do you mean Ash?"

Ashley opened her laptop and brought up a number of different CIA memo's, photos of different people, and a large number of emails. "Well, this man that died is the highest authority in the L.A. branch of the CIA, and the man that is going to be promoted to his position is a moron.

There were only 6 men that knew about the orders to kill me. The man that ordered it, is the one being promoted, and the man that died, only found out after they had supposedly killed me. The three other men that knew all worked directly under Snider, the new head of the branch. And the last person to know about my, uh, termination is Aiden.

But these four men, Snider and his crew are bad news. Blake is unusually cruel to anyone he comes across, his unnecessary kills and beatings are one of the highest in the branch; he has no regard for the different people he encounters, he seems to simply want to kill them all.

Then Geoff is dirty, he steals from different crime scenes and missions, he takes bribes, and when he kills, he leaves his signature: three gunshots to the heart area that form a triangle on the person's chest.

And lastly, Snider's younger brother, Rick- he isn't as bad as the others, but he blindly follows the orders of his brother with no regards to the law, or basic human decency. Rick is a moron, but a loyal moron. These men are the men that are left in charge of one of the largest branches of the CIA."

Spencer was looking over the various things Ashley had brought up on the laptop, slightly horrified at seeing some of the photos from past missions that these different agents had been on.

"If they are so terrible, how are they in charge of things, let alone still in the CIA?" Spencer questioned, a little confused.

"Well, these are all observations I have made over the years, and it was a rare situation in which I spoke out about anything. There are rumors, and assumptions made about different agents, but without blatant proof, little is looked into. The CIA is just like anywhere else; there is a lot of bureaucracy within the agency, and many situations are brushed off rather than investigated. These men kissed the right ass, and knew how to jump through the right hoops."

"So what is all this other stuff you have pulled up?" Spencer asked scrolling through a number of agent files.

"Well see, in the past few months there has been an uncharacteristically high amount of deaths within our branch, and with that an uncharacteristically high amount of new agents that have been hired by these four men. The agents that have died were good people, most being in the agency for a long time, and these new people that have been hired are a little too perfect. When I looked into their backgrounds, everything was a little too clean. And while it is possible that these new agents are that great, it is rare that none of them have any skeletons in their closets. It is a rare person that joins this line of work without some kind of darkness in their life.

And this man that died, Coleman, seemed to be very displeased with the orders to have me killed. I think he was beginning to catch on to something involving these men. I had said something to him a few years back, about Snider, but everyone believed I was saying this stuff because of my overt hatred of the man."

Spencer looked at the brunette a little shocked. Ashley had never really had an opinion of anyone, let alone one that was as strong and definite like hate. "Why did you hate him?"

"He was one of the first agents I worked with when I was recruited. He thought I was a chump, a charity case. He hated that I had a brain and that I was good at what I did. In most instances, I could beat him, and that annoyed him to no end. He was a bad agent, a bad person, and I knew it almost immediately.

Snider is about 10 years older than me, and actually cared about gaining power within the agency. And as he began to work up the ranks through different means, he made sure to flex his power against me. He even had me suspended for breaking protocol while on a mission. But my hatred for him simply boiled down to him having no sense of morality or regard for anything. His drive for power made me sick."

Spencer's slowly began rubbing the brunette's hand, trying to soothe the girl. CIA Ashley was a side Spencer rarely saw despite it making up such a huge part of Ashley's past.

"So what does all of this mean?" Spencer asked, having an idea of all the players and different situations that were occurring in this LA branch.

"That is what I am not sure about. I may just be paranoid, or reading into nothing, but it all has to mean something. It can't just be a bunch of different coincidences."

Ashley stood up and started walking, or pacing in front of the table. She was deep in thought, obviously concerned over all she read.

"But the thing is Spence, even if it is something bigger, what the hell am I suppose to do? Why do I even care? I am 'dead'; I wouldn't have cared about any of these people a few months ago." Ashley stopped pacing, hanging her head down a little.

The young doctor took the girl in. Ashley was obviously torn between the realities of her situation and her conscious. Despite Ashley's constant insistence that she is a truly selfish person, only concerned for herself, the brunette lived by a strict moral code, and honestly cared for others.

Spencer stood as well, walking towards Ashley. She wrapped her arms around the girl's neck and gave her a light kiss.

"Ash, you are a good person. It is one of the reasons I am in love with you. We will figure this out, and if we find something, a reason to worry, we will figure out what can be done then. Your 'death' is just a technicality; we can work around that easily."

Ashley smiled at the girl, her arms had instantly wrapped around her waist. Ashley leaned in, needing more assurance and finding it in Spencer's soft lips.

Spencer pulled back, knowing how easily things could escalate and result in the two of them spending another day in bed together. "Come on Ash, let's print some of this stuff out and try and get it organized before we have to go to my dad's."


	21. Two's Company, Seven's a Crowd

**Longest chapter to date (13 pages), to make up for no shout outs and the short chapter last post! Shout out's next chapter, promise. Hope you like it. PS imaferrari, so glad that fanfic messed up and you haven't left me!**

**Chapter 21: Two's company, Seven's a Crowd**

Ashley nervously clenched her fists tighter. Her eyes darted around, taking in the new scene while she mulled over her different options. She glanced to her left and saw Spencer, large smile in place, her eyes laughing mercilessly at her.

While looking into those blue eyes Ashley realized her only option would always be to follow the blonde. But Ashley wasn't a sap, and she would be damned if she said that when Spencer was clearly mocking her, so she responded the best way she knew how to:

"Shut up Spence!"

"I didn't say a word Ash." Spencer replied, lifting her hands in the air as sign of surrender. The smirk on her face clearly proved that the blonde was finding immense pleasure in Ashley's discomfort.

The two girls had spent hours printing out the CIA material and began laying it out on poster boards, finding small connections and discussing possibilities, both noted through strings and/or post-its on the boards. The two were only sidetracked three times for short (relatively) make out sessions, when one or both couldn't stand not touching the other. Now the two sat outside of Arthur's house.

Ashley was terrified, and not just because Spencer drove there and had the attention span of a five-year-old watching CNN. No, Ashley was scared to face the Carlin-clan (especially Chelsea) given that they most likely knew that she was now making out with their little Spencer on a regular basis.

"Ashley, come on, they have already met you, know you, and like you! This is fine; telling them about us is good news! Plus, if anyone gets physical with you, I give you permission to karate chop them."

Ashley snorted out a laugh; she had no idea what Spencer pictured when she imagined a fight, but Ashley was certain she has never actually "karate chopped" someone. Spencer had gotten out of the car and was now slowly opening Ashley's door, offering her a hand.

Ashley looked up and the girl, a bashful smile on her face, while she slowly linked their hands together.

"You won't leave me alone with them, right?" Ashley questioned, scared the family was waiting to ambush her on the other side of that door.

"Ashley, you have been shot on more than five different occasions. I am sure you will make it through." Spencer smiled at the girl, but when Ashley continued to look at Spencer with wide eyes, the blonde finely relented.

"I already promised I would protect you. Don't worry, they are idiots, a little protective, but still idiots." Spencer managed to drag the brunette out of the car and into her arms.

A quick kiss in front of the car was all Ashley would allow, especially when she could feel eyes on them from inside the house. Spencer, slightly confused looked at the brunette, who simply smiled and nodded her head towards the front window, where ducking heads and moving curtains could be seen.

Spencer only laughed as she dragged the brunette to the front door. After walking inside, the girls were met with an awkward Arthur standing near the living room.

"Hello girls! I had no idea you were here!" Arthur said, clearly lying. Spencer looked to the right and saw the rest of her family standing in the living room, pretending like they weren't spying.

"Hey Dad." Spencer responded, going to give the man a hug and a kiss. Ashley bashfully stood behind Spencer, not really sure what to do. Arthur pulled away from his daughter, and looked at the brunette.

"Ashley! Get over here." He said, soft smile and arms open. Ashley slowly made her way and gave the man a hug, admittedly an awkward one, but a hug nonetheless.

Spencer turned towards the rest of her family in the living room and said a small "hey" and looked over at Ashley, seeing the girl was still slightly terrified. It was adorable, to say the least.

Before anything could be said, Arthur called for his daughter in the kitchen. Spencer looked at Ashley, offered her a small smile and a hand squeeze. Upon realizing that Spencer planned to leave Ashley alone, Ashley shot the blonde a deadly look. Spencer only smiled mischievously and made her way to the kitchen.

Ashley looked into the living room and was met with a serious looking Chelsea.

"Ashley, we've been waiting for you, take a seat." Chelsea said while pointing at the couch.

Ashley let out a small sigh while taking a seat on the couch. _Feels like an interrogation _the brunette couldn't help but think.

Chelsea stood, arms crossed, directing a lamp to shine on Ashley's face. To the left of her was Glen, trying to look intimidating but failing miserably because there was a baby strapped to his chest. And to Chelsea's right was, whom Ashley assumed, a confused looking Clay.

"So _Spencer's_ _Ashley_, how are things with you and Spencer going?" Chelsea asked, knowing that she needed to shake down her best friend's new woman.

Ashley shifted somewhat nervously; she was very familiar with being interrogated, but not when it dealt with her feelings and emotions. "It's going pretty well, I think."

"Well Clay, Glen, and I just wanted to make sure-" Clay interrupted Chelsea's speech.

"Hey, Ashley, I'm Clay by the way. It's nice to finally meet you-" the boy had moved forward to offer a handshake to Ashley, but was stopped when Chelsea shrieked out "Clay!" and hit him on the arm.

He mumbled out a small "sorry" to Chelsea. The girl sighed in frustration and tried again, "As I was saying, Glen, Clay and I just wanted to make sure you know that we _always_ have Spencer's back."

"Yeah." Glen said, his voice stern. His speaking apparently woke the small child strapped to his chest, and his stern face quickly melted when the baby began to stir. He began to coo the child.

Chelsea slapped her hand to her forehead. _These idiots are ruining my intimidation plan_. Chelsea quickly composed herself again and stared down the brunette on the couch, who was trying not to show amusement in the situation she was in.

"Anyways. We have Spencer's back, and if you ever hurt-" Chelsea was again interrupted by Spencer this time.

"Hey guys, come check out what Ashley did! She fixed Mom's car." The two boys' eyes got wide at that.

Glen gave Ashley a huge smile, "Hey Man! You finished it! Nice." He gave the brunette a small fist bump while going outside to check out the car with Spencer and Arthur.

"Wow, Ashley, that is impressive. That car is very special to all of us." Clay said, giving the girl a smile and quickly following his brother.

Ashley looked to Chelsea who was simply shaking her head in defeat. The girl turned around and looked out the window at the Carlin clan checking out the car. Ashley felt bad for Spencer's best friend. She knew first hand how terrible it was when an interrogation goes badly.

Ashley stood up from the couch and went to stand near Chelsea, watching the family examine the car.

"I get it Chelsea." The artist looked towards Ashley as she began to speak, "I understand how important Spencer is to you, to all of you. And I agree that things as special and precious as Spencer need to be protected the way you try to protect her."

Ashley was staring at the beautiful blonde outside. Her eyes softened as she watched the girl laugh at something Glen said while playing with the small baby girl that was attached to him.

Chelsea watched Ashley intently as the girl continued, "But I love her. I promise you that. Like, would rather listen to her complain about _Jersey Shore_ than talk to anyone else love her. I love her like, wake up every hour to make sure this wasn't all a dream, love her. And if I ever do anything to hurt Spencer, I would probably beat the shit out of myself before you could ever get to me."

It was in this moment that Chelsea realized how perfect Ashley and Spencer were for each other, recalling the way Spencer had described her love for Ashley.

Chelsea was surprised to hear Ashley being so heartfelt. Granted the two hadn't spent much time with each other, but in the time they had spent together she realized how deeply guarded the brunette was.

Ashley was still watching Spencer interacting with her family. The blonde was genuinely happy, the smile on her face told everyone that. Even when she stumbled while walking up to the front door, Spencer still had a smile on her face. Ashley lightly chuckled at seeing her girl literally trip over her own feet.

"She is the best thing that has ever happened to me. And while I can never match up to you, me being in her life means there is one more person to watch out for her." Ashley finally finished, turning towards Chelsea, a crooked smile on her face.

Chelsea smiled at the girl, "We are cool Spencer's Ashley. We are cool." Ashley sighed in relief; she knew how important Spencer's family's approval was, and if Chelsea approved the rest should be easier. The two began to walk towards the front to meet the rest of the family as they came back inside, but Chelsea grabbed Ashley's arm, getting her attention again.

Chelsea looked at Ashley and very calmly said, "But don't get her knocked up Ashley, she doesn't need a shot gun wedding and I am too sexy to be an aunt." Ashley could only laugh in response._ Now I know where Spencer gets it_.

* * *

"Shit." Spencer muttered, realizing that she had poured too much into her cup. Granted she wasn't really paying attention to the task; her focus was set on the cute brunette smiling with her father, while seasoning some of the food for the grill.

Arthur was ecstatic upon hearing that Ashley enjoyed cooking and had quickly whisked her away to the food area. Glen and Clay had both made their way over towards the grill, feeling a sense of male obligation to stand by the fire and talk about propane versus charcoal grills.

"I think it is sweet that Glen carts around that cute little girl when is on again off again girlfriend comes into town." Chelsea said, easily terrifying Spencer with her sudden appearance.

"Oh my god Chelsea! You scared the shit out of me." Spencer exclaimed, hand to heart and gaining the attention of the rest of the family. Spencer looked at her friend giving her a smile, and bashfully sent a smile to the rest of the group, as an apology for the outburst.

Ashley had sprung up and was almost halfway to the blonde after hearing her exclaim, but relaxed upon seeing that Spencer was fine. The girls' eyes met and Ashley sent Spencer an equally bashful smile when both registered that Ashley had unintentionally stolen the burgers from the grilling area.

Chelsea slightly bumped shoulders with her best friend, trying to pull her out of the trance that Ashley seemed to hold over her. Spencer's head eventually turned toward the girl and Chelsea greeted her with a huge smile.

"You wouldn't have gotten scared, or spilled you soda, if you weren't undressing a certain brunette across the lawn." Chelsea stated, smirk in place.

Spencer blushed and mumbled, "I was not undressing anyone." There was a slight pause and the blonde sighed in defeat.

"Never mind that, how mean were you and the boys to Ashley?"

"Not worse than normal. Although your brothers really suck at this, they kept messing up my badass speech."

Spencer smiled at her friend, "Aw, I'm sure Ashley was still terrified."

Both girls returned their gaze to the brunette girl whom Glen had recently handed the small baby girl over to. Ashley had a terrified look on her face as she held the laughing child at arm's distance away. Spencer's heart melted seeing Ashley struggle as Arthur showed her the proper way to hold the baby. Chelsea wasn't nearly as transfixed, but watched her best friend stare at the scene with such love in her eyes.

"You know, I didn't think she would win me over. Especially not after tequila-a-thon we had a few nights ago, but Ashley really does love you, and she is pretty wonderful."

Spencer looked at her friend, slightly shocked. Chelsea had never really given approval of any of her past relationships, so for her to accept Ashley made the blonde extremely happy.

Spencer looked back at her girl, whom was properly cradling the small child and Ashley's head shot up, their eyes meeting. Ashley gave Spencer a proud smile, having figured out how to hold the child, and Spencer sent Ashley a smile of her own.

Spencer, eyes still fixed on the brunette replied, "Yea, she is pretty wonderful."

* * *

Glen watched his baby sister and Ashley interact. They were both sitting at the picnic table outside; Ashley's back was to the table, elbows resting on its top and her feet were sprawled in front of her, while Spencer straddled the bench, her knees pressed against Ashley's side. Ashley had throw her head back to laugh at something Spencer had said, while the blonde watched the girl, a smile painting her face.

They had little physical contact, only Spencer's knees pressing against Ashley's side, but Glen couldn't help but feel as though he was witnessing something much more intimate. The way the two girls were with each other seemed as though no one else was there, and everything was meant for only the two of them.

By simply looking at them talking, Glen felt as though he had walked in one of them half naked. There was a level of intimacy he couldn't quite understand.

He liked Ashley enough, she obviously cared about his little sister, and that was what really mattered. Not to mention Ashley was pretty handy to have around, there was no telling how long the mustang would have sat in the garage if not for the girl.

Yes, Ashley did seem to care about his sister. Hell, even that afternoon Ashley was half way across the lawn, raw burgers in hand, before he could even register Spencer gasping in surprise. The brunette seemed good enough to hang out with Spencer for that reason alone.

Glen glanced back at the two; Spencer's hand was lightly resting on Ashley's jean clad knee while she now laughed at something Ashley said. Glen couldn't stand it; it was just too much for an older brother to take.

The blonde boy made his way over to the girls, he placed his hands over little baby Susie's eyes and said, "Hey, you two, lets keep it PG-13 in front of the children alright?" And with that Glen huffed away, leaving the two girls perplexed.

Ashley and Spencer looked at one another, confusion on both their faces, and then burst out laughing again. As their laughter subsided Ashley stated in a matter of fact tone, "Your brother is strange."

"Tell me about it." Spencer replied, a small smile on her face as she glanced over at Glen, Chelsea, and little Susie.

"Is Susie Glen's?" Ashley questioned, still a little unsure where this small child had appeared.

Spencer looked over at the two, a small smile making its way on her face when she thought about her surrogate niece.

"No. Susie is Glen's on and off girlfriend's daughter. Staci and him started dating a little after Susie was born; Staci's husband was an ass and Glen was there to pick up the pieces.

Staci travels a lot for work and Glen is a moron, so they tend to break up and get back together all the time, but no matter what their relationship status is, he has always loved little Susie. She just got back from Phoenix with Staci, so Glen brought her over while Staci caught up on some sleep."

Ashley nodded her head looking over at Glen and Arthur playing with the baby. "Glen is sweeter than I imagined."

"He is." Spencer agreed. The girls looked at one another smiling. They were broken out of their little staring contest when Arthur announced that the food was ready.

* * *

Everyone was sitting inside at the large dining table and had begun digging into their meals when Arthur decided to get some real dirt on his daughter and her new love interest.

Chelsea had briefed everyone that the two girls, had in fact, gotten together. Arthur was ecstatic and terrified all at once. He was the only one that partially understood that there was some sort of danger that being with Ashley put the blonde in. But he could see it in her eyes, there was no way that danger overshadowed the love between them.

"So, Ashley. When are you heading back to LA tomorrow?" Everyone at the table looked at Ashley expectantly, eager to hear what, exactly, was happening with her and the blonde.

Ashley's eyes nervously met Spencer's. They seemed to have a sort of silent conversation with one another, which ended when Spencer gave Ashley's hand a light squeeze.

"Well, um, I actually decided to move out here. So the only reason I will need to head back to Los Angeles is to pack up, and tie up some loose ends. I will probably go either tomorrow or the next day." Ashley replied, nervously fidgeting in her seat, while addressing the entire table. She knew they were all curious as to what was happening, so she didn't pretend as if this was a random point of conversation.

"Well, I see, welcome to town then!" Arthur said, pleased that he knew the two girls would remain close.

"So you are just moving here? That is crazy. What about your family and friends and life?" Glen asked, and soon after felt three feet kicking his leg. He muttered out a soft "ow" while Spencer, Chelsea and Clay all glared at him for the obtrusive question, while Arthur chuckled at his son's brashness.

"Ash you don't have to answer-"

Ashley cut Spencer off, "No, Spence its fine. I am between jobs, as you know, so now is a pretty good time to relocate. And I don't really have any ties in Los Angeles. Um, both my parents died when I was young, and I have no siblings, so I am free to sort of roam around."

"Hey, Ashley, I'm sorry I didn't-"

Ashley cut off Glen this time, "No, no. I know, it is fine. Don't worry at all. Past is in the past right?"

Spencer smiled at the brunette, giving her leg a light squeeze under the table. The table was quiet, and Clay decided to break the silence.

"So, have you already found a place in town to move into or are you still looking Ashley?"

Ashley's eyes got a little wide, and Spencer wanted to laugh at the brunette's obvious discomfort. The young doctor decided to cut the girl a break.

"Actually Clay, everyone, Ashley and I have talked, and we decided that she is going to move in with me, permanently, and not as, like, a roommate thing." Spencer said, blushing slightly towards the end.

Four heads shot towards the two girls in surprise. Then everyone turned towards Arthur, gauging his reaction.

"Wow, honey, congratulations, to both of you. I am glad that you will remain a part of all our lives Ashley." Arthur said, sincerity could clearly be heard in his voice.

Ashley let out a light sigh as the rest began congratulating them. _At least that is taken care of_ she couldn't help but think. Spencer was answering various questions from the different family members, but something caught Ashley's ear.

"Yea, so we will probably head down to Los Angeles this weekend to get her stuff and bring back home."

Ashley turned towards Spencer, shooting her a serious look. "Spencer isn't coming to Los Angeles with me. She has already skipped far too much work because of me, so I will head to LA alone. Shouldn't be gone more than a night." Ashley was talking to everyone at the table, but it was clear her word were meant for Spencer.

Spencer met Ashley's glare with one of her own, "Don't be silly Ash, I have never used any vacation or sick days for as long as I can remember. I wouldn't want you to go to Los Angeles alone."

"Spence, no, you aren't coming with me to Los Angeles."

"Ashley, you really don't have much say in the matter."

Arthur could tell there was an obvious reason for Ashley wanting Spencer to stay home, and he assumed it had to do with her safety, "Spencer, honey, maybe you should listen to Ash-"

"Dad, I love you, but please, not now. Ashley is being dumb."

Chelsea, Glen and Clay watched as the two continued to bicker about the trip, enjoying the small drama that seemed to have no real substance to it.

"You are not coming."

"I am coming Ashley."

"Maybe I should come to Los Angeles with you guys too. I have been meaning-"

Glen was immediately cut off when Arthur, Ashley, and Spencer all yelled out "No!"

"Geez, a little dramatic guys. You probably woke up Susie." Glen replied, a little unsure why he wasn't allowed to go to Los Angeles.

Spencer and Ashley were still glaring at each other slightly, and then out of nowhere both started laughing hysterically. Everyone at the table was entirely confused except for Ashley and Spencer.

The two were still laughing, and Spencer had leaned in towards Ashley, their faces close as they both began to calm down. This entire fight in front of the family was ridiculous and when Glen decided he wanted to come, it was just too much for the girls.

Spencer placed a small kiss on the side of Ashley's head, and muttered out, "We can finish this conversation later" while Ashley nodded her head in agreement.

While everyone else at the table was confused and amused with the two girls, they were all happy to see that the fight was something that was easily shaken off by the girls.

Ashley then turned to conversation towards Chelsea and her latest art showing, and the meal continued on with laughs and lighter topics.

* * *

Ashley let out a big sigh as she settled on the piano bench, alone in the Carlin living room. The rest of the clan had moved out to the backyard for pie and poker. Ashley just needed a minute to herself. She wasn't use to family time, being open and friendly to people. It was harder than imagined to go from relative hermit to a normal member of society.

Ashley answered questions about her past as truthfully as she could, without giving everything away. Spencer had been there to help deflect and answer questions, but the family had an obvious curiosity about the girl whom had stolen Spencer's heart.

These things were all new to her, hell this relationship was all new to her, and she just wanted a moment of quite before she was sent into the lion's den again. Her fingers lightly brushed over the piano keys before she started playing random notes, random notes then turned into Bach.

Spencer noted the absence of the brunette almost immediately after the move to the backyard. She desperately wanted to find her, for nothing more than the selfish reason of being in her presence, but she understood this BBQ, her family, might be a lot for the ex-spy to take in. Instead of slowly making her way into normal life, Spencer had unintentionally shoved her off a cliff into it. The blonde understood going from nothing to this must be slightly overwhelming.

So the blonde sat outside as the rest of her family traded jabs about their poker playing. Finally the blonde had finished her dessert and had decided that she needed to find Ashley now.

As Spencer walked from the backyard into the kitchen, she could hear the faint playing of Bach coming from the piano. Sure enough, as she glanced over the breakfast counter, her brunette sat, back to the kitchen, playing the piano.

Spencer made her way towards the girl, leaning against the large entrance to the living room, opting to watch the girl play for a while. Ashley changed from Bach to Stevie Wonder's "Overjoyed". The song slowly made its way through the room, and Spencer smiled. She noticed the small goose bumps that had formed on the brunette, but she gave no other indication of being aware of Spencer presence.

From Stevie, she moved on to Regina Spektor's "Samson", but halfway through the song, the brunette started playing something the blonde couldn't recognize. Spencer slowly made her way towards the girl, standing almost directly behind her.

"I knew all the others, but I don't recognize this one." Spencer said, not surprised that Ashley wasn't shocked by her presence in the slightest. The brunette leaned back into Spencer's body, happy that the girl decided to finally come closer.

Ashley stopped playing; marveling in how nice it was to rest lightly on the blonde's body. She closed her eyes, and finally replied, "I was just making that one up."

Spencer brought one hand up towards the girl's head, lightly stroking the hair, while the other rubbed Ashley's arm.

"I didn't even know you could play." Spencer said, still excited to discover all of Ashley's extensive hidden talents.

"I sort of just picked it up. It all boils down to math in the end anyways." Ashley opened her eyes, only so she could look into the cool cerulean blue she had come to love so much.

Ashley turned her head and gave Spencer a small kiss on the inside of her wrist. The blonde smiled at the contact.

"Think you got enough alone time, or can I hang around here with you?"

Ashley was so grateful that Spencer was so in tune with her. It made Ashley feel less awkward about her strange behavior and reactions to certain situations. The fact that the blonde simply understood was a gift Ashley cherished because she often had difficulty explaining what she felt.

"Alone time never means you have to leave, just the rest of the world." Ashley smiled, realizing how true those worlds actually were. She swung around on the bench, so she could stand up and face the blonde.

Spencer couldn't take it anymore. Ashley was just too beautiful and when she mindlessly threw out precious words like that Spencer couldn't help herself. She took a quick glance outside to make sure her family wasn't watching through the large glass door, and then launched herself onto Ashley, kissing her the way she had wanted to all day.

Ashley was slightly shocked at the action, but quickly found her footing and began kissing the girl back. Soft lips on soft lips, Spencer's tongue lightly requesting Ashley to part her lips. They kiss for a few short minutes, and finally Ashley pulled back, realizing they were in Spencer's father's house, with the family a glass sliding door away from seeing the heated display. But Ashley didn't pull back very far, leaving their foreheads to rest against each other.

"God, I missed that." Spencer said, trying to even out her breathing. Ashley simply smiled, bringing her hand up so her thumb could softly stroke Spencer's cheek. She placed a light peck on Spencer's lips.

"Me too."

"Sorry I left you alone with Chelsea, she shot me a 'get the hell out of here or I will kill you look', I hope it wasn't too bad."

Ashley smiled thinking about the "little talk" Chelsea had attempted.

"No it was okay. Glen and Clay made it fairly entertaining, but I think I passed the test by the end of it."

Spencer smiled, "Yea, Chelsea does that to all of my girlfriends." Both Spencer and Ashley's eyes widened at the term that slipped, and Spencer blushed a deep red.

"Not that you are my girlfriend, or I told everyone you are my girlfriend, she probably just assumed and you know Chels, and-"

Spencer was cut off when Ashley kissed her, trying to slow down the high-speed rambling that was starting to occur. The girls pulled away from one another again, Spencer a goofy smile on her face, and Ashley with soft eyes and a small smile.

"I am glad Chelsea assumed the worst." Ashley simply stated, and in her own way was able to reassure Spencer about their relationship status.

Ashley again glanced outside, and saw the family was still playing cards; she smiled in relief. Spencer had never been a fan of PDA herself, wanting to keep intimate moments private, but sometimes she looked at the brunette in front of her and couldn't help herself.

Ashley's head was still turned, looking at the family outside. Spencer, curious as to what the girl was staring at, lightly squeezed Ashley's hip. Ashley turned away and looked at the blonde, with a light smirk on her face.

"They are talking about us." She said, amusement, evident in her eyes.

"What! How do you know? Those jerks! What are they saying?" Spencer asked, her family was ridiculous some days, but was more eager to be able to eavesdrop on them.

"I can read lips." Ashley simply stated while turning her head back to look out of the glass door at the family. Spencer's eyes widened at that news, totally excited in hearing that because that skill could end up being a lot of fun.

"Well, first they noticed we were both missing, and then Glen grumbled something about us keeping things PG-13 while Chelsea laughed and both your dad and Clay blushed.

Then they started discussing me moving in with you. Glen is worried I'm a gold digger. Chelsea scoffed at that thought and is more worried that I am a heartbreaker. Clay is curious about how you seem so sure about all this, and your father sort of smiled and said 'Love is a whirlwind'. It looks like they are worried for you, but happy at the same time." Ashley finished, feeling slightly guilty at invading their privacy.

She turned to face Spencer again, smile on her face. Spencer gave her back an equally goofy smile, knowing that her family was worried about nothing. Ashley would never hurt her; it was the rest of the world they should worry about.

* * *

Clay watched as his brother got more and more annoyed as he continued to lose his money during the game. He smiled lightly, shaking his head at his antics. Today had been a good day, Chelsea was nice to him today (he was never sure if she would be nice or mean, as it seems to change every time they see one another), Spencer was happy, and he loved getting to see little Susie.

He got up and made his way into the kitchen for another soda. Clay thought about Ashley. She seemed like a smart girl. They had discussed computers for some time because Clay knew that was the line Ashley worked in, and was impressed with her knowledge, despite the fact that she seemed increasingly bored with the topic. She then asked about his case, and was able to offer a few past court cases that may help him with his own. That was impressive to say the least.

So he was glad Spencer found some one with intellectual substance, but it was more than that. Ashley could say something completely thought provoking and intelligent and then see Spencer making goofy faces at her across the lawn, and return them. She was easily able to switch from serious and smart to light and playful, it was a trait Clay had only seen in his younger sister. Clay was happy Spence could find someone that was on her level.

Nevertheless, Clay was worried for her. It seemed very fast for everything to be happening, and Spencer couldn't possible know that much about the brunette. He was worried for her, as any older brother would be. In that moment, Clay glanced up and saw the two girls on the couch in the living room.

Spencer had her legs slung over Ashley's lap, and Ashley's head was resting on Spencer's shoulder. Spencer was eating ice cream, right out of the container, and animatedly talking about something. Even though Ashley's eyes were focused on the TV in front of her, Clay could tell Ashley heard every word, responding when she needed to and allowing Spencer to go on and on.

As Spencer spoke she was mindlessly moving the spoon, holding ice cream, around and Ashley began to eye that, and finally moved forward, eating the ice cream Spencer had intended to eat. Ashley smiled at Spencer, when Spencer gave her a look of annoyance, amusement, and shock. Spencer got a devilish grin on her face, and brought a bite of ice cream up to Ashley's mouth. The brunette eyed the girl warily, but moved closer to the spoon, hoping to get a bite. Right before Ashley was going to eat the ice cream, Spencer took the spoon and smeared it on Ashley's cheek, hollowing in laughter.

Ashley looked shocked for a minute, chocolate coating her face, but smiled and lunged at Spencer, pinning her under her while she rubbed her sticky cheek onto the girl's face. Spencer and Ashley were both laughing uncontrollably while smearing ice cream on the other's face. Ashley pulled back a little staring deeply into Spencer's eyes, the laughter was gone, but both girls had a soft smile on their face. Spencer moved up, and gave the girl a light kiss on the cheek, where the ice cream was.

Clay turned away from the scene, allowing the two girls some privacy. A small smile made its way to his face as he walked back outside, his sister would be all right; if not, it would probably be worth it to her.

* * *

Everyone, but the two girls, had left Arthur Carlin's house. The late lunch had turned into a late lunch, early dinner, and come cleaning time, it amazed Arthur how quickly everyone seemed to need to get back home. But Ashley offered to stay and clean, and Spencer simply groaned and began picking up plates from the table, knowing there was no getting out of it.

Arthur loved fresh meat at these BBQ because they were always eager to help. He was glad to hear the two had seemed to work everything out. He worried over his daughter's stubbornness because he believed Ashley did have Spencer's best intentions and safety in mind all the time. His daughter was never one to lie down and wait, she always wanted to be in the middle of the action, but he hoped that in whatever situation these two girls were in, Spencer would play it safe. Arthur scoffed to himself and couldn't help but think that isn't likely.

Everything was cleaned up and the girls were grabbing their things. Arthur smiled as Ashley wordless slipped her own jacket onto the sleepy Spencer. Ever since Spencer was a little girl, she would get remarkably sleep, if only for an hour, after eating a big meal; he was glad that some things don't change.

Arthur noticed the ice cream stains on both girls' t-shirts, but decided some things shouldn't be questioned. They said their goodbyes, Ashley still a little uncomfortable when getting attacked in an Arthur Carlin Bear Hug, and made their way out to the car. Arthur watched through the window as the two walked hand in hand and Spencer said something to Ashley. Both girls stopped and Spencer's face lit up. Ashley took a step in front of Spencer and leaned forward a little.

Arthur laughed as he watched Spencer jump on the brunette's back, effectively getting a piggyback ride to the car. Both girls were laughing as Ashley spun them around in circles before making her way to the car. Ashley opened the passenger side door and instructed Spencer to hop off. Before getting into the seat Spencer smiled at Ashley and gave the girl a light, sweet kiss.

Ashley closed the car door, walking towards the driver's seat with a huge smile on her face. Arthur turned from the window and smiled to himself. He was glad that Ashley and Spencer had found each other. His only wish was that his wife could have been here to see their daughter as happy as they once were.

* * *

As the girls drove home, Spencer had almost instantly fallen asleep, despite the drive being less than five minutes. Spencer had grabbed Ashley's hand, lacing their fingers together while Ashley drove them home. Ashley had a light smile on her face and couldn't help but think that the meal had gone well.


	22. Los Angeles Or Bust

**Chapter 22: Los Angeles or Bust**

Ashley was lounging on the couch while Spencer got dressed in the bedroom. Upon arriving home, Spencer suddenly felt energy and lust running through her veins. The minute they walked through the door, Spencer pounced the clueless Ashley. Needless to say, Ashley didn't mind at all.

Still slightly sticky from the ice cream fight, both girls decided multitasking was in their best interest and took their party into the shower. A little while later, prune-y fingers, and no hot water left, the girls finally got out of the shower. Ashley grabbed her clothing and changed in another room for fear of attacking the blonde again and falling back into a marathon bed toss.

Spencer emerged from the room, satisfied grin on her face, and moved towards the couch where her spy was lying down. Spencer sat down, while Ashley sat up so they could just chat.

"Well, that was fun." Ashley said, grinning like an idiot.

"Which, the shower or the BBQ?" Spencer asked, hoping the girl had a little bit of fun hanging around her family.

Ashley thought for a moment, "Both I suppose. But the shower, definitely something I would love to repeat." Spencer chuckled; it had been a really good time.

They were both quiet for a little, Spencer leaning towards the brunette, her head resting on her shoulder while her arms wrapped around the little waist. Ashley was slowly running her fingers through Spencer's soft hair.

"I thought Clay was going to faint when Glen started changing Susie's diaper." Ashley finally said, recalling Clay's face drain of color.

Spencer laughed, "You weren't looking all that fondly on the situation either, if I recall correctly." Ashley had looked slightly horrified when Spencer had glanced over at her.

Ashley only smiled pulling Spencer a little closer while mumbling "shut up" into Spencer's hair.

Both girls sat together in silence for a few more minutes, knowing they had a talk ahead of them, but stalling a little bit longer. When the elephant in the room literally began strangling them, both girls sighed and spoke on top of one another.

"I'm going to Los Angeles."

"I'm going to L.A. alone."

The two pulled apart, eyeing the other warily. Both were stubborn over stupid things, but this meant something to each of them, and neither wanted to give in.

"Spencer it is way too dangerous for you to go. There is no way I am letting you come. I need to break into my old place, and get things that I cannot let the CIA find. It is easy for me, no one knows that building better than I do, but you cannot come. It is just too risky for you."

Spencer's eyes narrowed at the girl. Spencer didn't like to take orders; it was never something she did well.

"Ashley, I am not a moron, it is dangerous for you, and it will be dangerous for me. I am going with you. I don't care what you think."

At this point the girls' voices had remained calm, simply stating, again, what each wanted, but Spencer's disregard for her own safety really pissed the brunette off.

She shot up from the couch. "What don't you get Spencer? I am not letting you put yourself in danger any more than you already are by being with me. I care about you too much to let you walk into something like this without thinking about the consequences!"

Spencer stood up, to match up with the brunette, "I am not a child Ashley, so don't treat me like one. I am not some idiot you have to protect; I am your partner in every sense of the word. So where you go I go!"

And with that both girls began yelling at each other over one another. During the arm flailing and yelling both could faintly hear a soft knocking at the front door, but the girls continued to ignore it, too invested in yelling at one another. The faint knocking became insistent knocking, which escalated into pounding on the door. The girls had slowly moved towards the door but never stopped yelling at one another.

Spencer yanked the door open, shooting an innocence Glen a mean scowl and a "What?"

Glen put his hands up in surrender. He remembered this Spencer, crazy angry Spencer that lived with him from the years of 14-17. He had not missed her.

"Whoa, I just came over because Staci wouldn't let me watch the game at her place and my TV is broken." Glen explained, making his way into the apartment. He took in the red faced Spencer, and the equally angry Ashley.

"Not a good time Glen." Spencer said, eyes still ablaze.

"Come one Spencer, just let me watch!"

"No Glen, get out."

Glen really wanted to watch this game, "Come on! Come on! Come on! Come on! Come on! Come on! Co-"

And Glen was cut off when he fainted into Ashley's arms. Ashley was pissed, and Glen was not helping things. He obviously wasn't leaving so Ashley made her way towards him, placed a hand on his shoulder and squeezed on two nerves, causing him to painlessly pass out.

"Ashley!" Spencer scolded the brunette as she dragged the unconscious boy to the couch.

"What? You were about to punch in the face and this is harmless, he will wake up in like an hour!"

Ashley threw him on the couch and turned to Spencer, still insanely heated up from their argument, but before she could start again, Spencer went off.

"I am not letting you go to Los Angeles alone! I am fucking coming with you and there is nothing you can say about it!"

"There is no way in hell you are fucking coming! What don't you understand? I am putting my goddamn foot down! I refuse to let you come!"

Ashley's chest was heaving up and down; her eyes were dark and angry. She looked fucking sexy, and despite their fight, Spencer noticed this small fact. She lunged at the girl, still fully aware that her brother was passed out on her couch.

Ashley was shocked for a moment, but soon forgot to care as Spencer pushed her up against the wall, kissing her roughly. Spencer wasn't the only one that found the other hot when arguing. Ashley kissed Spencer back just as roughly, her hands moving near the blonde's ass.

Spencer pulled away a little from the girl, grinding her pelvis into Ashley's. "God, you are so fucking sexy when you are mad." Spencer said, nipping the brunette's neck.

Ashley didn't respond with words, but brought their lips back together, missing the girl already. But before things got too heated, Ashley remembered what had started this, and knew they needed to finish this talk. Ashley put her hands on Spencer's shoulders, literally removing the girl from her own body.

"Spence, we can't, god I want to, but we can't. We have to finish this, and your brother is on the couch."

Spencer took a step back, allowing the lust-induced fog to clear from her head. Both girls let out a little sigh, knowing that yelling was not the way to come to a resolution.

Ashley began in a calm, gentle voice, "Spencer, I know you want to come. I get it, but this is dangerous. I won't lie to you about that, it is dangerous for me, and it is sure as hell dangerous for you. Especially considering this weird stuff going on at headquarters right now. I refuse to let you get hurt. I will come back, and if something happens, at least I will know that you are safe."

Spencer walked towards the girl, taking both of Ashley's hands in her own.

"Ash, I know what I am asking seems crazy and naïve, but I need to be there. I am not some army wife that is just going to sit while you throw yourself in danger. I could never do that, so please don't ask me to.

I need to be there with you, and if something happens, it happens to both of us. I meant it when I said us together. It is the only way this can work, because I can't be with you and worry every minute whether you are alive or not.

If you go, I go. And I know, I am 100% positive, that if the situations were reversed you would want the same thing, so don't try and stop me. I will listen to you there, I will do things your way, you are the expert, but I need to be there. I need to know that this" Spencer lifted their joined hands to Ashley's heart "is still beating. Because when yours stops, so does mine."

Ashley placed a gentle kiss on the girl's mouth. "I love you." Ashley said, with sincerity lacing in her words. She let out a sigh, finally relenting, "You can come, but you have to listen to EVERYTHING I say."

Spencer kissed the girl mumbling a "yes ma'am" on her lips. Ashley wrapped her arms around Spencer, and Spencer nuzzled her face into the brunette's neck. Ashley looked on the couch at the passed out Glen.

"Sorry about your brother." Ashley said, wincing when she remembered her rash actions.

"It's fine; I totally was going to punch him." Ashley laughed at hearing that.

"What should we tell him?"

"Are you kidding me? I can't wait to make fun of him for fainting! We will just leave out the part about you being the reason he fainted. God, this is like an early Christmas present, he is never going to live this down. I can't wait to tell Chelsea."

Ashley smiled, and simply shook her head at the crazy girl. She knew that if Spencer asked her to, she would make anyone faint upon request.

* * *

The girls were sitting in the rental car in the alley behind Ashley's old apartment building. They were discussing the plan one more time. Last night, after Spencer had mercilessly teased Glen for fainting and he shuffled out of the apartment, the girls began to plan for the trip to LA.

Spencer offered her car, but Ashley said it was too unique and would only draw attention, also getting a rental car would insure that no names (at least no real names) would be linked to the car they drove.

They would leave in the morning, clean out Ashley's apartment of the things the CIA missed, spend the night in Ashley's other apartment, and then make a big production of her moving out of there. It would be simple, and Ashley obviously had all the minor details worked out in her head.

So here they sat, outside her old building. Spencer was intently listening to Ashley recite the plan again, patiently nodding her head with each point.

"And then I will be in the room with the power box, there I can disable the security cameras in the building. I can use the fire exit to make it up to my floor, and I can get in through the window hanging by the fire escape. I will clean out the stuff, turn the cameras back on and be done."

Spencer nodded her head to the plan, but then realized something.

"Hey, what do I do?" Spencer inquired, not hearing what her job would be.

Ashley gave the girl a quick peck and said, "Sit in the car and wait." Spencer scowled and looked similar to an upset 4 year old as Ashley made her way out of the car laughing at the blonde.

Spencer sat in the mumbling to herself about how she should be allowed to help. She watched as Ashley emerged from the shutting down the cameras and made her way into the building. Spencer wasn't going to stand for this any longer; she got out of the car and made her way to the front of the building.

Meanwhile, Ashley had managed to get inside her apartment, and glanced around. She clenched her fists, hearing the leather gloves squeak as she took in the scene. It looked as though the place had been ransacked, which technically, it had. The small amount of furniture she had was thrown around, papers were everywhere, and paintings had been ripped to shreds in hopes of finding other documents. It was nothing like how Ashley had left it.

As she walked through the large apartment, feeling angry and longing all at once, she heard a knock on the door. Her eyes widened, and her body instantly tensed. She reached for her gun, pulling it out and placing the muzzle against the door, so she could easily shoot through the door hitting whoever was on the other side. She cautiously peered through the peephole and was met with a grinning Spencer, waving on the other side.

Ashley let out a sigh of relief/annoyance and opened the door, yanking Spencer through the doorway. Spencer's eyes widened at the sight of her gun, and Ashley put it away behind her back.

"What the hell are you doing out of the car, and how did you get passed the security guard?"

Spencer smiled at the girl, "Oh you mean Gus? He is a sweetheart/perv. I mentioned how I had a crazy night last night and woke up in a strange girl's bed naked, and ran out before she woke up, but I forgot my purse, and begged him to let me go up to her place. Not only did he push the elevator button for me, but offered me a spare key to the apartment."

Ashley only rolled her eyes as the girl gave her a cheeky grin.

"You were suppose to listen to me, it could have been dangerous up here."

Spencer gave Ashley a quick peck, just as Ashley had in the car and replied, "The whole point of sleeping with you is so I don't have to listen to you." Spencer could see the slight anger in the girl's eyes and tried to appease her a bit, "Don't worry, I walked in the opposite direction from your door to make sure no one was standing outside, and then I got to your door and listened for you kicking someone's ass, since it was quite I knocked on the door. I even had a lie ready if someone other than you opened up."

Ashley looked a little better knowing that Spencer was actually taking this sort of precaution. Seeing Ashley's relief, Spencer brushed by her and took in the apartment. Spencer was dying of curiosity to see the Ashley prior to their meeting.

"Jesus Ashley, I was totally with you for your body, but had I known you were rich I would have acted faster." Spencer joked taking in the huge apartment. Despite the destroyed furniture and the mess everywhere, Spencer could see the sleek modern design Ashley had in mind. The large floor to ceiling windows gave a beautiful view of downtown Los Angeles. There was a sleek state of the art kitchen and down a long hallway Spencer saw a guest bathroom and part of the large bedroom.

Ashley slightly blushed at Spencer's comment, somewhat embarrassed for the blonde to be standing in her personal space.

"Um, sorry for the mess. I kind of died." Ashley said, small smirk in place. The brunette walked over to the blonde, pulling out an extra pair of leather gloves for the blonde to wear.

Spencer looked at Ashley, she loved seeing the normally composed, confident girl acting bashful and out of character.

"Ash, when you said you had enough money saved to take care of me for a while, how long were you talking about?" Spencer questioned, never one to be concerned over money, but slightly stunned upon realizing how well off Ashley actually was.

Ashley gave the girl a small smile and quietly replied, "Approximately four lifetimes, or three very, very luxurious ones."

Spencer whirled around, her eyes wide at hearing the girl's confession. Ashley began to explain, "Well, when dad was arrested, I got this certified letter, and it was from him, in case that ever did happen. He had hidden a nest egg for me, a nest egg of about 3 million dollars. And while I know it was wrong, my only goal was survival, so I never told anyone, and then when I got older, and learned how and where to invest it, along with the pay from the CIA for 13 years, and living fairly simply, I managed to save a lot, just in case.

No one knows about it, and if I ever do actually die, it will be donated to various charities and such, but for now it is sort of hanging out in a number of different banks in a number of different countries."

Ashley watched Spencer process this information. She knew the girl didn't care about money, Spencer was smart, had two very good jobs, and went to school mostly on scholarships. The girl was financially stable, if not fairly well off herself, but Ashley was positive that it was nothing compared to the fortune she had collected over the years.

Spencer smiled at the girl and simply replied, "Well, aren't you full of surprises? Glen should be more worried about me being the gold digger."

Ashley was relieved the blonde wasn't upset with her for not informing her sooner. Spencer was never one to rush or pressure Ashley to tell her things, and Ashley appreciated it. It was nice knowing that she was allowed to have secrets, but even nicer knowing she didn't want any between herself and the blonde.

Spencer rubbed her glove-clad hands together and said, "Let's get down to work, what are we here for?"

Ashley walked to the kitchen counter putting her back to it and took three large strides in front of her and two to the left and knelt down in that spot. She grabbed a knife from out of her boot, and began to run it along the groves connecting the hardwood floors. In a few seconds, Ashley was able to pop the piece of wood up and moved it aside. Spencer peeked down and saw a small keypad and finger scan. Ashley entered four numbers to the keypad, took of one glove and placed her index finger on the small pad. There was a small chime and a large noise coming from the kitchen.

Spencer was somewhat mesmerized with what was happening, it was like a scene out of a James Bond movie. Ashley got up and moved towards the kitchen, the counter top was angled a little and Ashley hefted up the marble slab, revealing a safe in the middle. Ashley entered a different code and the safe finally opened. It was full of documents, two laptops, and a number of different weapons. There was also a small mahogany box. Ashley grabbed the duffle bag she had and began emptying out the safe. Spencer, still a little in shock made her way over to the brunette.

She began helping Ashley move things into the bag, completely avoiding any of the weapons. Spencer turned her head towards the girl as they were working and casually said, "God you are sexy when you are spy Ashley." Ashley simply beamed at the girl, and continued working, small smile on her face.

Once everything was out, Spencer saw a small keyboard and screen inside the safe. Before she could ask Ashley began to explain, "I built this safe. I wanted the best, and something no one would know about but me, so I decided to do it myself. I also installed these small cameras throughout the apartment, they are untraceable." Ashley began typing on the keyboard and the screen showed the two girls in the apartment, it began to rewind and Ashley deleted everything that had them in it. She placed a small flash drive on downloaded the rest of the video from the day she was sent on the mission to today. Then she deleted it all and turned off the cameras in the apartment.

The girls continued making their way through the apartment, Ashley taking in the things the CIA had found, which was next to nothing, and Spencer taking in Ashley's old life. It was bare and minimal; it painted a picture of Ashley's life before; it depressed the shit out of Spencer. She hated imagining the girl going through life for so long, so alone.

Ashley's bedroom was huge and beautiful, and tastefully sparse. Spencer had noticed all the books scattered and destroyed around the apartment and it broke her heart to think how long Ashley may have been collecting those for. Ashley was in the bedroom as well, working through the debris, trying not to move too much when Spencer glanced at the bed.

"So this is where the magic happened huh?" Spencer joked, knowing Ashley had a past, and a strange, long, extensive past at that. Spencer understood, and did not even think to judge Ashley for it, but she was human and she was a jealous person, and the idea of anyone touching Ashley in that way made her want to vomit and cry simultaneously.

Ashley glanced up from what she was doing and eyed the blonde. She felt bad for the girl, her past was something she knew she couldn't handle if Spencer had been as active as she was, but Spencer never, ever made her feel ashamed about it. There were so many women, and some men, never more than one night. It was the only contact Ashley got, and the only contact Ashley thought she would ever have.

Ashley turned around and walked towards the girl, a loving smile in place. She placed her hands on Spencer's arms rubbing them. She leaned in for a sweet, soft, and loving kiss, trying to convey to Spencer that she was all that mattered, in Ashley's mind, Spencer was her first, her first everything.

Spencer pulled back from the kiss, still cupping the girl's face. She had been joking and thought Ashley would joke back, but was insanely happy and surprised that Ashley knew exactly the right thing to do to make all the others seem like nothing. Ashley provided her a comfort she didn't even know she needed.

Ashley quietly whispered out, "No magic happened here. No one has ever been here. You are the first person I have ever brought here."

Spencer couldn't help but smile at that. The girls turned back to their work and were soon done with the apartment.

Ashley and Spencer walked towards the front door. Spencer took off the gloves while Ashley checked the hallway to make sure Spencer was safe to leave. With a series of kisses and "I'll meet you at the car" 's Spencer went out the front door while Ashley took once last look at her old life and climbed out the window to begin her new one.

* * *

When the girls had packed the car and Ashley began driving to her second apartment, Spencer realized she had no idea where they were going.

"Hey Ash, where is your other place?" Spencer asked, curious to see this other apartment Ashley had hidden away.

"Its over in Old West Hollywood."

"Really? Oh man, I haven't been there since my UCLA days! There is the great little club there. They always have great DJ's tonight. We have to go!"

Ashley was silent. "I don't know if that is a good idea Spence."

"Come on Ashley! It is to celebrate you being done in Los Angeles for a while! It will be fun, and I will even let you bring your gun AND your poison throwing knives. You know how much those freak me out." Spencer pleaded, giving her best puppy eyes and head tilt.

Ashley released a sigh, "Fine, we can go after we get most of the stuff packed in my other place."

Spencer let out a little squeal and leaned over placing a kiss on the girl's cheek. Ashley could only smile at the girl's excitement and hope this club wasn't one she frequented in the past.


	23. Shaken, Not Stirred

**Okay! Literally no words for how much I suck for not updating! No excuses other than that, but thank you to the random people you have personal messaged me, commented, etc. It really is the reason I sat down and wrote this. Long chapter to make up for my disappearance. And have no fear about the cliff hanger, I am already half way down with the next chapter. **

**Sorry if it is a little crappy, seems like forever since I have been emerged in this world. Thanks for the understanding and enjoy! **

**Chapter 23: Shaken, Not Stirred**

Spencer was afraid of a lot of things, spiders, heights, disappointing her family, Glen's refrigerator, but nothing scared her as much as the thought of losing the brunette sitting to her left.

Since the day Ashley, literally, fell into Spencer's arms the blonde has been in a constant state of panic. Not only was her own life at risk, but the brunette she had come to love so deeply, in such a quick amount of time, was in a constant state of danger. Spencer often played it off, hoping Ashley couldn't see the stress and worry she felt everyday. She knew, and understood that being with Ashley meant this danger and constant state of fear, but she also knew it couldn't take over their lives.

So, Spencer completely ignored it overtly. She didn't want Ashley to feel guilty, and she knew it was her responsibility to ensure that Ashley didn't spend every minute of everyday worrying about it as well.

Spencer would never admit to the girl that last week while she was on a run she dropped to the ground when she heard a car backfire, thinking it was gunfire. And Spencer would never admit to holding her breath every time she walked into the apartment until she was met with the brunette alive and smiling at her. And she definitely would never admit to how many nightmares she has been having since meeting Ashley a little over two weeks ago. Most times Spencer got away with telling the startled brunette she couldn't remember the dream, but she was sure in time she would either have to elaborate or force them to simply disappear. She hoped for the latter.

Some days Spencer wished she could take Ashley and lock her in an underground bunker and keep her there forever, just to ensure her safety, but then she would watch Ashley having a meal with her family, or see Ashley's eyes light up when they did simple things like sit in the park and watch ducks. Spencer knew Ashley's entire life had been the equivalent to living underground.

Despite all the adventures, and traveling, Ashley never had normal happiness; she never got to enjoy her life, her youth, or her experiences and Spencer would do anything to try and give some of that back to Ashley. So she begged Ashley to go to clubs with her, and she pleaded with Ashley for dumb, silly things, despite the knot of fear in her stomach, simply because the brunette deserved it; she deserved it all.

Spencer was pulled out of her musings when she felt a gentle kiss placed on the back of her hand. She looked over at Ashley and smiled, unknowingly missing the girl that was sitting right next to her. The car had finally stopped outside a beautiful apartment building. Unlike the one in downtown, which was all glass and steel, modern and sleek, this place was warm; it had character and heart.

Spencer turned back to her girl and leaned over, placing a soft kiss on her lips. Both sighed at the contact, pulling their lips away from one another, but staying close, Ashley's nose gently rubbed against Spencer's cheek. Spencer turned her head slightly placing a soft kiss on the girl's neck and then pulled away, stepping out of the car, eager to see another aspect of Ashley's life.

Ashley considered the girl standing outside of the car. More and more often, Ashley had caught her lost in her own head, a silence washing over the girl, and while Ashley had no problem with silence, she knew it was uncharacteristic of the young doctor. Spencer loved to talk, about everything, about nothing, and Ashley knew that. So every time Spencer got this quiet, this lost inside her head, she couldn't help but worry.

Ashley may not be completely aware of Spencer's stress in regards to their situation, but she wasn't blind to it either. Ashley saw every time the girl flinched when she heard a loud bang, she could see the stress roll off of Spencer the second her eyes found Ashley's when she walked through the front door of the apartment, and she definitely knew Spencer's nightmares were something that lingered in the blonde's mind rather than something that was easily forgotten. Despite knowing this, Ashley didn't push the blonde. If Spencer wanted to talk about it she would, Ashley was well aware of the blonde's ability to talk, but the brunette spy didn't want to push the girl. All she could do was silently comfort her.

Ashley made it a point to be near the couch when she knew the girl was coming home, if only to insure Spencer could spot her right away. Ashley pretended not to notice the flinching body whenever a neighbor slammed their door too loudly. And the brunette simply wrapped her arms tighter around the blonde when she could feel the small girl struggling through a nightmare. It was enough to break Ashley's heart, but she was silent because she knew Spencer liked acting brave for her.

So she played her part and offered Spencer ignorance and resistance when Spencer suggested things like going to clubs, even though the only thing Ashley wanted to do was get Spencer as far away from all of this as possible.

Ashley was brought out of her musings when she heard Spencer clear her throat, her hands placed on her hips, head slightly tilted, and foot tapping impatiently out of the car waiting for Ashley to join her. Ashley could only smile, get out the car, and lace her fingers through Spencer's as they walked towards the entrance of the building.

Spencer was trying to soak everything in. This building was far more intimate and welcoming than Ashley's other home. It was only four stories high, there was no doorman or security, but a simply lobby with mailboxes and an elevator. Based on the call box outside there were only six apartments in the building.

As they rode the elevator to the top floor, Spencer couldn't help but feel Ashley's shyness again. It was a rare thing to see, but Spencer could understand her being a little nervous considering that Spencer was not seeing one of her homes, but both. Spencer gave the girl's hand a small squeeze and a gentle kiss on the cheek, smiling when Ashley smiled and seemed to relax a little.

The two exited the elevator and Ashley led them towards the end of a hallway, but before they made it there, they heard someone calling Ashley's name. Both turned and saw a smiling 30 something man approach them.

"Ashley! Welcome home! How was your trip back east?" He asked, looking genuinely happy to see the girl.

Spencer was a little baffled, but only gave a little smile and looked to see how the other girl responded.

"Hey Steve, it was great actually. Ended up staying longer than planned and, well looks like I will be heading back there in a few days. I got an amazing job offer, and I really couldn't refuse. I am only here to pack up some stuff."

"Wow, that is great Ashley! I am happy for you." Steve responded with a smile, and then glanced at Spencer, also noting their linked hands.

"Oh, sorry Steve, this is Staci, the girl from college I was actually visiting out there. She decided to tag along and help me pack." Ashley beamed, making sure that no one knew that Spencer Carlin was anywhere near Los Angeles.

Spencer gave the man a smile, and offered her unoccupied hand to shake his own and a little "hello".

"Nice to meet you Staci, Ashley has told me so much about you! I would love to catch up with you two, but I really have to run. I can't believe you are moving out of here Ashley!"

Ashley gave the man a smile, "Don't worry Steve, Tom is still in the building, so if there are any problems you can talk to him and he will contact me, and I am sure I will be back more often then not."

Spencer watched the two, completely lost as to what they were talking about, but she just stood by silently knowing the answers to her questions would be filled later. They parted from the man, and when Steve thought Spencer wasn't looking he gave Ashley a subtle thumbs up and head nod towards Spencer, obviously approving of whatever relationship they had.

Ashley simply blushed when her eyes met Spencer's, aware the girl had seen the action. Finally, the two opened the door to Ashley's apartment and Spencer soaked it in.

It was completely different from Ashley's other home, but oddly familiar. Both places screamed Ashley despite the differing set up and décor. This placed was furnished simply as well, but was warmer. A well-worn brown leather couch, bookshelves, an impressive sound system, and a small dining table were tastefully scattered around. All the furniture seemed to be a rich, dark wood, sleek but naturally beautiful. The kitchen could be seen; still state of the art and modern, and to the right was a hallway leading to a bathroom and assumingly Ashley's bedroom. It was a softer modern feel, but it was very much Ashley.

The brunette fidgeted around, watching the blonde investigate the apartment, looking over the books, music, art that was through out the apartment.

Spencer looked up at the girl and smiled softly, "So, Staci huh? He has heard a lot about me?"

Ashley rubbed the back of her neck and looked at the girl, "Yea, well Staci was one of my 'college friends' that gets mentioned from time to time. Steve thought I was in DC visiting you, well Staci. Just needed to give you a cover." Ashley responded with a little crooked grin.

"Who is Tom?" Spencer questioned, still a little confused from their interaction.

"Oh, well, I, um, actually own the building. Tom is the manager and he runs everything for me, so I don't have to bother with it."

Spencer's eyes widened a little at the new information. Ashley had admitted to having a ridiculous amount of money stored away, but Spencer didn't really think about the implications. Owning this building was definitely not something everyone, let alone most people, could afford.

Spencer merely chuckled and softly responding, "Alright Moneybags, let's get you packed for DC." Planting a soft kiss on the other girl's lips.

* * *

Spencer was exhausted. They had been packing for hours, and while Spencer realized doing anything with Ashley turned in to something fun, it was still tiring. They had packed up most of the music and books (there were SO many) and everything in the kitchen, etc. All that was left was the bedroom, which Spencer had yet to see.

They laughed, danced around in the living room, and ate pizza while sitting on the floor, but Spencer had snuck away to take a break on the bed she assumed would be in the bedroom.

The girl walked through the door, and it was decorated in the same way the rest of the apartment was. The doctor eyed the bed a little wearily, imagining what other people could have occupied it, but finally flopped down. She turned her head and noticed the only personal photo she had seen in either apartment sitting on a nightstand next to the bed.

Spencer grabbed the frame, her fingers slowly stroking the picture. There was the cutest 5-year-old Ashley laughing relentlessly on a woman's lap. The woman was looking down at her with a large smile in place, and sitting on the arm of the chair next to them was a man softly smiling at the two beauties. Spencer's heart ached for the family in front of her. They seemed so happy and loving. It killed Spencer to think that one drunken asshole snatched everything away from this precious little girl.

Spencer was faintly aware of Ashley's presence when she lay down on the bed. The brunette reached over, wrapping her arms around the blonde's waist and dragged her across the bed and bringing her closer to her own body. Ashley placed a soft kiss on Spencer's shoulder and then nestled her chin onto it, staring at the photograph with the blonde.

"It is the only one I have left. Dad did something with most of the pictures, and after the raid I could never find any other than this one I kept in my room."

Spencer sighed, hating the CIA a little more for the continual damage they did to this wonderful woman. Spencer only softly replied, "She was beautiful."

Ashley sighed out a soft "yea" before nuzzling further into Spencer, her nose gently tracing the girl's shoulder, up to her neck, where she planted a soft kiss.

Spencer turned around in the girl's arms, wanting to see the chocolate eyes she had fallen in love with. Giving the girl a tender kiss, Spencer saw in Ashley's eyes that it was time to change the subject.

Spencer gave the girl a teasing smile and a little eyebrow lift before asking, "So how many girls do I have to beat that have rocked your world on this bed?"

Ashley laughed at Spencer's question despite herself; the determined look in on Spencer's face showed she was ready to make Ashley forget about anyone before her.

"Um, no competition. No one has been here either, just you." Spencer gave the girl a surprised look, so Ashley continued to explain, "Whenever I got together with someone we always went to their place, my homes were the only places I could be me and be somewhat relaxed. When I was with people, I was never me, so I never wanted them to be in the places where I felt safe.

You, are, um, the only one that I could ever imagine being in these places, and you are the only person that makes me feel safe. You see me."

Spencer couldn't stand it anymore; Ashley's eyes were big, pleading, and sweet and she just continued to say everything right, so Spencer leaned in and kiss the girl passionately.

Pulling away for a moment, both girls a little breathless, Spencer said with a small smirk, "Well, looks like it is time to break this bed in then."

* * *

Ashley walked through the doors of the over crowded club, her eyes quickly scanning her surroundings. Luckily, this club was not one she frequented in the past; unluckily, it was a club owned by one of the larger crime bosses of the city. That translated to no cops or CIA agents, seedy people, and no security cameras. It was a somewhat ideal situation for the supposedly dead brunette.

Ashley walked down the stairs to the underground club, her eyes searching for familiar blonde hair. After spending some time getting to know Ashley's bed, the two girls finally finished up packing, took showers, and Ashley forced them to head to the club separately, just for safety's sake.

Ashley had given the blonde a fake id and credit card to use; she was going to be damn sure Spencer was never recorded as being in Los Angeles this weekend. The soft smile and equally soft eyes conveyed to Ashley how touched Spencer was in her efforts to create such elaborate fakes. Ashley often did things to make Spencer feel loved, but to know Ashley had planned something like this, her own smiling face on a New York driver's license along with matching credit card, was something that made everything feel so inclusive and permanent. So Spencer took both, gave the girl a kiss, and followed instructions rather than annoy the poor spy by breaking the rules.

Ashley's eyes took in the danger around the room, one meathead standing by the stage, obviously packing a weapon, one at the top of the stairs, and one milling around the bar, all obviously part of the "security" of the club. There were stairs leading to a small office on the other side of the building, and Ashley could faintly make out three people in the office.

After taking in the information, her eyes finally settled on the only reason she was here. That beautiful blonde hair, lightly curled was near the bar, trying to get the attention of the bartender. At catching a glimpse of the girl, Ashley quickened her pace, eager to be able to be near Spencer again.

The brunette's eyes narrowed when a decidedly dumb and sleazy looking guy made his way towards her blonde to try and hit on her. When Ashley finally reached the two, she caught the tail end of the conversation.

"Come on babe, one dance, I will even buy you a drink after." The man said, leering at Spencer.

The blonde was starting to get annoyed; Ashley wasn't there yet, she really wanted a drink, and this jerk just couldn't take a hint. She turned her head to give a not so nice response, but before she could, she felt a strong, small hand placed protectively on her lower back. Turning slightly she was met with Ashley's blazing eyes, looking more dangerous than she had ever seen them, glaring at the Jersey shore wannabe.

"Seems like she isn't interested asshole. So, back off." Ashley barked, fighting all urges of breaking this asshole's nose, just to get the stupid smirk off his face.

"What's it to you?" He asked, oblivious to how much danger the small brunette could offer.

Ashley took a step towards the man, getting in his face, her eyes unwavering, her jaw clenched, hand forming a tense fist. She only seemed to relax a little when she felt Spencer place a soft hand on her forearm; the blonde's thumb slowly stroking up and down.

"Get the fuck away from us before this gets ugly."

And finally the man seemed to comprehend the seriousness in Ashley's eyes and voice, stumbling away with wide, fearful eyes.

Ashley gave a small smirk of victory and turned towards her girl. Spencer gave Ashley a slightly disapproving look, but there was laughter in her eyes.

"Green looks good on you," The blonde cheekily stated, laughing when Ashley slightly blushed.

Spencer stuck her hand out "Hi, I am Staci Carson. I would love it if you bought me a drink, uh…" The blonde was smiling, obviously waiting for Ashley to fill in the blanks of her cover.

Ashley gave the girl a large grin, and couldn't help herself when she returned the handshake and said, "Spencer Carlin, small town doctor, award winning journalist for articles on a major squirrel epidemic, and general rambling klutz."

Spencer scoffed in amusement and offensive at Ashley's "cover" and resisted the urge to kiss the smug off of the beautiful ex-spy's face. Instead she gave the brunette a grin of her own replying, "That is so strange! I knew a girl named Spencer Carlin who just broke up with her girlfriend because she was constantly putting her own foot in her mouth."

Ashley let out a large laugh, overcome with love and appreciation for the perfect girl in front of her. The brunette turned towards the bar, lacing the fingers of their linked hands and easily caught the attention of the bartender.

Spencer looked on with amusement when the bartender came over asking what the girls wanted. Ashley simply looked her up and down and replied, "Vodka cranberry with a twist for her and I'll take whiskey on the rocks." Spencer should have been surprised that Ashley knew her drink, but then realized the brunette probably knew more about her than anyone else in her life, simply from how observant she was.

After receiving their drinks, the two walked towards a small, secluded table, so they could talk over the music pounding through the club. They sat next to one another in the wrap around booth, Ashley's arm resting on the back of Spencer's chair, while Spencer worked to sit as close as possible to the girl.

"Thanks for the drink, and saving me from the asshole Ash." Spencer said leaning into the girl's ear to ensure she could hear her. Before pulling back, she placed a small, grateful kiss on the girl's exposed neck, knowing it was a losing battle to try and keep her distance from the brunette.

Ashley smiled, dropping her head to give the girl a kiss. Spencer was beginning to regret forcing them to go out tonight rather than spend another evening wrapped up in the sheets of a shared bed. Spencer slowly broke the kiss, knowing they were in a fairly crowded bar, and how much the brunette really did hate PDA. Spencer, herself, wasn't a fan of giving anyone a free show, but it was nice that sometimes the two honestly couldn't help themselves.

The girls sat in the booth, casually sipping their drinks, talking and laughing at the crowd before them. The music was decent and the girls were enjoying themselves, realizing that despite being out in public, nothing seemed to shatter the small bubble the two fell into when they were together.

Spencer leaned in close to the other girl, whispering in her ear, "Care to share a dance?"

Ashley smiled at the girl, wordlessly getting up and offered her hand to the blonde, leading them towards the dance floor. The girls started moving against one another, wrapped around the music and each other's arms, the bass slowly thumping through their chests.

The two were enjoying themselves, loving the crowded dance floor forcing their bodies to get closer and closer. Ashley looked over the blonde's shoulders, and instantly was on alert. She felt more than saw the sudden tension in the large security guard at the top of the stairs; he was listening to something in his earpiece. Her eyes scanned to the guard standing a little behind the stage, his face serious and scanning the crowd. Finally, her eyes darted to the guard at the bar, his eyes dead set on hers, stalking his way towards her.

She knew, without a doubt, this meant trouble. She had to think and think fast. The most important thing was protecting Spencer; everything else was secondary. These men were bad guys, obviously involved with the mob, and while this eased the pang of guilt she felt for what she was about to do, it did not entirely erase it.

The brunette still moved her body to the music, not ready to alert the blonde about the danger, she slowly reached for one of her poison darts, knowing she had to time this perfectly to not cause a scene. As the security guard walked past an empty couch, Ashley threw the dart, watching it hit his neck, his arm fly to the spot, and in three quick seconds he sank backwards onto the couch, dead almost instantly. To onlookers he simply looked as though he had one too many drinks.

Ashley's eyes shot to the security guard backstage. She continued to dance with Spencer. Spencer was so lost in the music, and the seemingly good time they were having, she had yet to notice the tension rolling off of Ashley, or the sudden turn of events. The spy shifted their bodies, allowing for a better angle of the next security guard, she threw her arms up, seemingly wrapping them around Spencer's neck, while also hitting the guard with one of her darts.

Her eyes flickered to the last guard after she watched the other man stumble to the floor. He was making his way down the stairs, trying to push past the large crowd. Ashley turned her attention to Spencer, knowing she needed to find out what was going on and also get Spencer to safety. It was then that Spencer noticed the tension in the other girl's arms, and stopped dancing trying to look her spy in the eye.

The brunette leaned close to the blonde, whispering in her ear, "Spencer, I need you to stay calm and keep dancing." As Spencer registered these words and the calm seriousness in Ashley's voice, she hesitated for only a moment, but continued to move her body with Ashley's.

The brunette continued when she was sure Spencer understood something serious was happening. "Please, you need to do everything I say, no questions asked. There isn't time." The brown eyes flicked towards the man getting closer.

"I am going to kiss you, and you are going to push me away and slap me, hard Spence, make it believable. Then I am going to go into the bathroom and take care of this, and you need to leave this club as fast as you can, don't stop for anything; get in a cab, go to the closets hotel, get out, get in another cab and then go to a hotel far from here. Westwood, maybe, or Santa Monica. Use the fake id and credit card I gave you. Don't call me, just get a room their and wait for me. I will call you. Please, just please listen to me." Ashley finished holding her breath.

She pulled away slightly, her eyes landing of Spencer's terrified ones. Ashley reached up, her hand softly stroking the blonde's check, giving her a soft, loving smile, offering her the only comfort she could.

Spencer was terrified. She didn't want to leave Ashley; she didn't want this to be happening. She couldn't find the words the right words; terrified this would be their last. They should have left; they never should have come. She wanted to give Ashley the world and a happy life, but she was so scared that she wouldn't even get another night. Before she could even contemplate anything else, Ashley's soft lips were on hers, offering love, tenderness, and what terrified Spencer, a goodbye.

It took everything in Spencer to push the brunette away, everything in her body just wanted to pull her closer. There were tears in the blonde's eyes when her hand went up and slapped Ashley.

Ashley took it, and looked at the blonde's sad and guilty face. That look was worse than any slap Ashley could ever receive. With one last look at the brunette, Ashley watched Spencer pretend to storm off, unknowingly avoiding the security guard that was getting dangerously closer to Ashley.

Once the brunette knew the guard was not going to touch Spencer, she turned on her heel and darted off to the women's restroom. She passed a broken vending machine, with an out of order sign taped on. Ashley grabbed that, and stuck it on the bathroom door as she walked in. Surprisingly enough the bathroom was empty.

Ashley took in the small space. She couldn't kill this man, well not initially; she needed information. She needed to know that her presence ended at him, and she was certain to make sure that the blonde would be on no one's radar.

Ashley noticed the low hanging pipes near the entrance of the bathroom. She only had a few more moments before she would meet this last guard. The brunette got up to the pipe, pulling herself up and waiting.

The door opened and closed, and there was the last security guard, a giant, beefy man, obviously looking for the brunette. He slowly made his way into the bathroom, and just as he passed, Ashley dropped down, using her momentum to kick him in the back.

He stumbled forward, the air getting knocked out of his lungs. He turned, and his eyes took in Ashley. A small smirk made its way onto his face, and Ashley couldn't wait to wipe it off. He threw a punch, which Ashley avoided. She countered the attack, her knee making contact with his stomach. He reached out and landed a solid slap onto Ashley's face, and she felt the throb instantly, and her lip splitting open.

Now she was pissed. Her face and body had just fucking healed from her fight with Aiden! Her instincts kicked in, her years and years of training, and after several punches, kicks, and a quick maneuver, Ashley had her knee pressed tightly into his back, and one of her knives resting on the man's throat. She was breathing heavily, adrenaline rushing through her veins, and a smirk of accomplishment on her face, this man was easily double her weight.

Her free hand patted him down, only finding a handgun in his possession. She quickly tucked it behind her, and now she would get her answers.

"What the fuck do you want with me?" She asked, her voice gruff, and unforgiving.

"What's the matter honey? Panties in a twist?" He mocked; smiling despite the knife digging into is skin. Ashley remained silent. "That blonde bitch giving you a hard time?"

Ashley saw red and placed two strategic kicks into his kidneys, earning a low moan of pain from the large man. Smiling with a small amount of satisfaction, she knew she needed to get away from the topic of Spencer.

"That blonde bimbo is a dime a dozen, but I am pissed that you and your idiot friends are ruining my night of finding any easy girl to have a good time with. So before things get bloody, why don't you tell me what the hell your problem is?"

The man beneath her was still twitching in pain. Ashley had kicked him hard, and the memory of it made it a little easier to talk about Spencer in such a dismissive manner. The man sighed, finally being able to think through the pain he felt rushing through his body.

"The boss showed us your picture about two months back, saying if we ever saw you to kill you on the spot. About two weeks back, Boss says you've been taken care of. It took me a minute, but I recognized you, and told Mikey and Jimmy. I was just following orders."

"Why the fuck would your Boss want me dead?"

"I dunno, just said to kill you." The man mumbled out. He was lying, holding something back. Ashley twisted the knife a little pressing deeper into his skin.

"Fuck! Fine! All I know is that Boss has been working with someone, someone that shouldn't be working with a crime boss. That is all we know, everything has been under wraps. The Boss ordered us to take you out as a favor to his 'new partner'."

Ashley sighed. He was telling the truth, but his truth offered her little information. Ashley slowly released the pressure of the knife on his throat, and stepped away from him.

He slowly made his way up to his knees. Ashley should kill him, but a guilt she had never felt before was making her hesitant. The more Ashley thought about it, the more she realized every moment spent with the blonde, was a moment that made Ashley more and more human. Things were shifting away from her need for her own survival into a world of morals, right and wrong, love and forgiveness. It made Ashley uneasy to say the least.

Ashley looked at the man, trying to get his bearings. And suddenly Ashley felt a sharp pain on her leg. Looking down she realized the man had made a swipe at her leg with a knife he pulled out of his boot. It was a superficial wound, probably wouldn't even need stitches, put now Ashley was pissed.

Her instincts kicked in once again and they were fighting once more. Her mind was on autopilot, with the only goal being survival now. Before she could even realize it, she had ended his life with his own gun.

Ashley looked down at the body and then at the weapon before tucking it into place against her back. She made her way out of the bathroom, and looked towards the stairs that lead to the office. Her mind briefly went to Spencer, praying that the girl had listened and was now in the process of checking into some hotel. She hoped she would be able to join her, but knew that she needed to do one last thing.

She slowly made her way up the stairs and towards the office. The blinds were down, but she could make out two bodies, one sitting at a desk, and the other standing guard near the door. Ashley didn't really have a plan, but she had always been good at thinking on her feet. Before she knew it, she was yanking the door open, her arm wrapping around the guard's neck, putting him in a choke hold, while her other arm gained control of the gun in his hand, aiming it towards the body at the desk. Her small hand was wrapped around his, clenching the gun, her finger resting on his, ready to press his finger down, easily pulling the trigger. There would only be his fingerprints on the gun.

Her eyes finally looked up at the desk, widening with realization. Standing at the desk, gun pointed in her direction was Rick, Snider's brother. He was pale, as if he had seen a ghost, Ashley smirked at that thought _I suppose he is seeing one_.

"Davies. What a surprise. You just missed that idiot Geoff, but don't worry, I will be sure to send him your regards."

Ashley's eyes were fixed on the man in front of her; she had no idea why the CIA would be in a club like this, but it was obviously nothing good. The man Ashley had in a headlock struggled a little, but the brunette only tightened her grip on him.

"Sorry to ruin your plans Little Ricky, but I'm surprised that you thought Dennison could take care of me. I like the new digs, the CIA not cutting it anymore?"

Rick gave a wry smile, "I have no idea what you are talking about. I am one of the highest-ranking members at the Los Angeles CIA branch. I am CIA through and through. You should know that the line between good and bad, CIA and mob has always been thin."

"Enough small talk, let's get to the serious business. Why did you need me dead Little Ricky?" Ashley could see Rick wince every time she used the nickname; he really hated being called that, and Ashley wanted to get under his skin. The man she held captive was getting more and more restless.

"Personally, I just hated you, but in the larger scheme of things, we couldn't have the golden child, seemingly born and bred CIA spy to lurk around our affairs. You and Coleman just wouldn't fit into our new world. But we need to hurry this up Davies, we are late for a little party!" He said, his stupid grin, stuck on his face.

"Party huh? My invite must have gotten lost in the mail."

"Typically, you don't give invitations to party gifts. Your dead body should be a very nice gift for my brother and Blake. They are the ones throwing the party."

Ashley's suspicions were confirmed; those four idiots were working together and had killed Coleman. Ashley needed a plan and quick, Rick's face was beginning to show how anxious he really was, and she definitely could not let this man step out of the building. Her life was hanging in the balance, if the others knew she was alive, she would always be chased rather than forgotten. They would first start at the small town she had begin to think of as home, and that was far too close to Spencer for her liking.

The music was blaring downstairs and Ashley was glad, it would easily drown out the gunshots that would soon be ringing through the room. Ashley tried to remember everything she could about the man standing in front of her.

Rick Snider: allergic to peanuts, a moron, brother of an asshole, terrible at lying, failed CIA training on the farm twice before being admitted as an agent, when he shot he was always off target by shooting to the right, is probably a repressed homosexual…

The facts kept running through her head as she slowly backed away from the desk, with the poor bodyguard still in her grip, and the gun pointed at Rick's heart. And finally she registered Rick's finger twitch and pull the trigger, aiming for her head. Ashley moved both of them slightly to the right, while simultaneously letting out three shots to Rick's heart, making the mark of a triangle. Rick's bullet missed her head and hit the head of the guard. Ashley had never been so glad for remembering his poor aim as she was in that moment. Both bodies hit the floor.

Ashley picked the gun and whipped it clean with her shirt, and placed it back down. It wasn't the most thorough set up, but it would definitely look like Geoff and Rick had some words, and Geoff couldn't keep his cool. Well, at least is what Snider and Blake could conclude.

Ashley slightly shuttered, knowing she needed to get out of here now, knowing how close she was to death once again, and knowing how many dead bodies she was leaving. She needed to leave and find Spencer. She needed to call Madison to help her clean this up, set up some sort of alibi. She turned on her heel heading for the door, and looked up and met shocked blue eyes staring at her.

"Spencer."


	24. Reunited and It Feels So Good

**Chapter 24: Reunited and It Feels So Good**

Spencer's eyes instantly welled with tears the second her hand connected with Ashley's face; Spencer knew the pained look on Ashley's face had little to do with the slap. Before the blonde instinctually kissed away the hurt on Ashley's face, she spun on her heel and tried to storm away from the brunette.

_Don't look back. Don't look back. If I look back, I will not follow her directions_. Spencer continued to chant as she marched towards the exit, tears streaming down her face, hands shaking from the emotion.

Spencer couldn't handle the idea of never seeing Ashley again; she could hardly wrap her mind around the notion. And as she stumbled up the steps towards the entrance to the club, a terrifying thought hit her: slapping Ashley might be the last way the two interacted with one another. It was then that Spencer felt she couldn't breathe.

She finally made her way through the doors, fresh air greeting her along with a mass of people waiting to get inside the club. Spencer was on the sidewalk, trying, and failing to get air into her lungs. She felt dizzy, and nauseated, and couldn't see through her tears. The blonde's mind briefly realized she should be embarrassed for her behavior in front of a large group of strangers, so she walked towards the end of the block, trying to get some privacy so she could pull herself together and call a cab.

She was slightly bent over, using breathing techniques to try and calm down the panic attack she just went through. The tears were still streaming down her face, but had reduced to a small trickle. She finally felt able to reach for her phone to call a cab company. As she dug through her purse she felt it.

A sharp, hard tip pressed into her back; a rough hand wrapped around her exposed bicep. Her breath hitched as she heard a deep, gruff voice whisper in her ear, "Make a noise and I will kill you right here."

Spencer tensed, slowly nodding her head, the voice continued, "You are going to come with me, back into the club to figure out what the hell is going on, or your little brunette friend is dead."

Spencer fought the urge to gasp. _Ashley was in trouble. Ashley was in over her head_ were the only thoughts running through the blonde's head. She instantly knew that she had no options in the matter, she would not gamble Ashley's life. With a slow nod, she was spun around, the man, and his knife pressed delicately against her back as the walked back to the club.

Spencer realized the man was the bartender that served them earlier. She briefly hoped that Ashley didn't tip him.

Making their way through an entrance in the back alley she heard the man speaking, more to himself than to her, it seemed. "I knew you two were more than strangers. That little stunt on the dance floor was smart, but I saw how she looked at you at the bar, and I saw you looking right back at her.

I don't know what the fuck is going on, but the boss isn't going to be pleased when he notices that two of his men are dead because of some random brunette bitch."

Spencer almost let out a sigh of relief. If two men were dead, that meant Ashley was probably behind it, able to protect herself. And based on this man's ramblings, he seemed to have no idea who Ashley was. That was also good news.

The two pushed their way through the dance floor, walking to the bathroom. A sign claiming "out of order" was on the door, and the man pushed through. They were both shocked to find a man lying in a pool of his own blood.

Spencer could feel the knife dig into her back.

The bartender muttered a small "fuck" before turning them around and out of the bathroom. It was strange; Spencer's first instinct was to help the man in the bathroom, despite obviously being dead. It was probably because of the doctor in her, but the instinct was squashed when she realized it was most likely Ashley's doing.

Spencer was lead up a set of stairs near the back of the club. As they approached the top, both the bartender and Spencer witnessed Ashley barely miss a bullet and then firing three shots to someone before dropping her human shield to the floor.

The knife at Spencer's back made its way to her throat as the bartender pulled her closer to him upon seeing the act of violence.

Spencer was torn: the relief in seeing Ashley, alive, and seemingly unharmed was a gift from the gods, but seeing her literally kill a person, the look on her face as she calmly wiped down the weapon in the dead man's hand, her eyes looked dead themselves, so harsh and empty. It made Spencer's blood run cold.

Finally, Ashley's head lifted and met Spencer's eyes. Spencer faintly heard Ashley say her name.

Spencer almost wanted to smile when she saw the life return to Ashley's golden brown eyes upon seeing her own blue ones, but she remembered the cold blade against her neck, and she saw Ashley's eyes shift to something she had never seen before. Spencer knew the look of complete and utter anger and violence was swirling behind those brown eyes, and Spencer's captor was on the receiving end of it.

The man pushed both of them through the entrance of the office, taking in his dead boss, and colleague, while continuing to keep an eye on Ashley.

Ashley was seeing red. She watched Spencer, the knife pressed against her skin. In Ashley's 28 years on this earth, she had never felt anything close to the rage she felt now. If it were an option, Ashley would torture this man for even thinking about touching Spencer, but she knew that wasn't an option.

Ashley finally spoke through gritted teeth, "I am going to say this once. Let. Her. Go. Now."

Ashley saw the knife being pressed harder into Spencer's throat and the small wince Spencer gave due to the pressure. The man began to reply, "She is my bitch no-" But before he could even finish his sentence Ashley had killed him; throwing knife directly through his eye. His death was almost immediate, and Ashley wished that she could have made the man suffer, but Spencer came before her need for revenge. Spencer came before everything.

Spencer stood stock still, only lightly gasping when her brain caught up with the situation around her. Her capture fell to the floor, the knife deeply embedded in his eye, and Spencer assumed, his brain as well. Spencer's eyes went up and met Ashley's concerned ones.

The brunette slowly approached Spencer. Ashley knew the look on Spencer's face, it was surprise bordering on shock, and Ashley wished there was time; time to shake Spencer out of it, but they needed to leave now. The music had been able to drown out most of what happened, but it was only a matter of time before more people or cops were sent.

Ashley grabbed onto Spencer's hand, trying to get the blonde to focus on something, focus on her. Ashley needed to ask the most important thing. Her eyes racked over the girl as she asked, "Are you okay? Are you hurt anywhere?" The blonde mutely shook her head and Ashley let out a sigh of relief. She then asked, "Spence, does anyone else know about you or me being here? Did he mention anything?"

Spencer was working on breathing, in and out. She had never been more grateful for Ashley's hand, an anchor, a life raft, that keep her from loosing it. Ashley was looking at her with such soft, caring eyes. The eyes Spencer fell in love with, eyes that were nothing like the cold, lifeless ones she saw when Ashley was killing those men.

Spencer whispered out a soft, "No. No one else knows."

Ashley, again, let out a sigh of relief; at least they could leave now. Ashley laced their fingers and began to lead them out of the office, grabbing the knife out of the bartender's head before exiting.

Spencer could barely make out the music that continued to pound through the club. All she could register was the hand wrapped around her own, leading her away. The second the bartender said he would have Ashley killed, she instantly knew she was at his complete mercy. She felt no fear for herself, only for the brunette spy. The blonde knew that all that mattered was making sure Ashley wasn't hurt. But now, now that the immediate danger was gone, Spencer felt everything rushing back to her. But the most prominent emotion was not that of fear for her own life, or terror in what she had witnessed, but pure and unadulterated relief in knowing that Ashley was okay. Spencer considered that fact; there was definitely something wrong with her.

Ashley led them towards the back of the club, finding the exit that the bartender had brought her in through, and they walked through the alley. Spencer vaguely processed that Ashley was on the phone with someone. She could only make out certain words and phrases in her own daze: Durate… need clean up at… six dead bodies… one CIA.

Spencer stopped trying to make sense of it.

Ashley hung up the phone, relief flooding through her because Madison was in town, and was surprisingly close to the club. She would cover; she would say she was there for fun and things got ugly, she got attacked. They wouldn't investigate, not very thoroughly at least. The two made it to the street and Ashley took in their surroundings. They needed to get out of her now, and fast. No time for a cab.

Ashley looked at the cars lining the street. Two Hondas, a Toyota, and a sleek, black Ducati. Ashley had picked the winner. The brunette walked them over to the motorcycle. She finally let got of Spencer's hand, only to hot wire the engine. Once she had the motorcycle started, she turned back to Spencer.

It nearly broke the brunette's heart to take the girl in. Eyes wide with confusion, the poor girl was trembling like a leaf. Ashley unzipped her brown leather jacket; it was essentially her security blanket disguised in bomber jacket form and went to wrap it around the blonde.

Ashley's heart broke when she saw Spencer flinch when she went to wrap it around her. The brunette paused feeling terrible that she had scared the girl, so much so that she would flinch when she moved.

Spencer instantly regretted flinching. It wasn't Ashley; it was never Ashley. She simply hadn't even noticed that Ashley was had turned around and was facing her, so the sudden movement startled her. The blonde looked into the chocolate eyes and saw the pain, fear, and hurt, and Spencer instantly launched herself into Ashley's arms, kissing her softly, so softly. Spencer could feel her tears begin to run down.

Ashley could hear the soft, "No Ash, it wasn't you. I swear it. I love you. I'm so sorry's" coming from Spencer's mouth as she continued to kiss her softly. Ashley appreciated it, she was so relieved that Spencer didn't hate her; that Spencer could see her at her worst and still kiss her the same way she had before.

Ashley finally pulled away, putting Spencer in her jacket, and quickly wiping her tears. There was only one helmet, Ashley grabbed it and handed it to Spencer. The blonde looked like she was going to protest being the one to wear the helmet, but the look in Ashley's eye made the words die in her throat.

They both hopped on the bike, and Ashley sent them flying down the road. Spencer's arms were wrapped around Ashley's waist growing tighter the faster Ashley drove. Spencer's mind briefly thought about how hot her girl was controlling such a powerful motorcycle with such ease, but her mind was too occupied to hold on to the thought for long. Spencer just closed her eyes and tried to forget everything except her arms around Ashley and the city flying by.

* * *

The young receptionist had seen some strange things. Working in Los Angeles, in a hotel where the rich and famous came to play, she was bound to see some odd things, but this situation seemed to be one of the strangest she had seen.

The two women had walked up to the reception desk, no luggage, looking worse for wear. The brunette had a deep red wound on her leg, along with blood seemingly dripping down from her arm, and a cut on her lip that matched the soon to be swelling face. Her uninjured arm lead to a hand that was clamped tightly, but carefully to a young, blonde woman, that looked completely terrified, bruises forming on her neck and arms and a small cut at her throat. But while she looked terrified, it was hard to miss the love that radiated out of her for her brunette counterpart.

The brunette did all of the talking, offering no excuses, no smiles, nothing but the facts. They needed a room for the night, away from the elevators, on a floor that was in the middle of the building. She then slid a large stack of cash and offered the name Jane Doe.

All of this was nothing new to the receptionist. It was rare that the frequenters of the hotel gave names or left paper trails. If this was an affair, the receptionist was sure whichever was married would leave their spouse in an instant for the person standing next to them. If this was domestic abuse, the receptionist had never seen such a tender and caring looks than what these two girls gave each other. As the girl worked on her computer, making all the arrangements, she saw the brunette silently pull the lost looking blonde closer to her, placing one of the most tender kisses on the girl's temple. The blonde closed her eyes at the gesture, seemingly melting into the contact.

After finally finding a room, the receptionist silently slipped two keys across the counter along with the room number. The brunette grabbed the two keys and wordlessly led the blonde away. The receptionist watched the two walk away, still completely confused as to what the hell they were doing, when the blonde turned around, meeting the receptionist's eyes for the first time, "Could you please send up a first aid kit?"

The receptionist mutely nodded, shocked at the calm tone the blonde had, the kind eyes, and even the fact that she had registered her brunette partner was injured at all. But then again, if the blonde was aware of anything, it was the brunette she was with.

* * *

Ashley closed the door to their room and finally faced her blonde doctor. The two hadn't uttered a word to each other since getting on the bike. Ashley had driven for a while, ditched the bike (which involved a pretty cool motorcycle flying off the edge of a cliff scene), got in a cab, and ended up at this hotel. Despite their silence, Spencer's hand never seemed to leave Ashley's, and the brunette's eyes were the softest the blonde had ever seen.

Spencer's brain was still trying to process everything that occurred through the night. Not only did they have to say one of the most heartbreaking goodbye's in the club, but Spencer was (for the most part) kidnapped, witness to a large amount of dead bodies (by her girlfriend's hands), and saw the cold blooded killer that haunted Ashley's conscious day after day. While seeing Ashley like that didn't stand a chance of changing Spencer's feelings towards the brunette, it certainly changed something; Spencer just couldn't decide exactly what it was.

Maybe it just made all this real, or maybe Spencer finally understood how far Ashley had come in the short time they had known each other. They only fear that Spencer had wasn't the one Ashley was worried about, it was the fear that if something ever happened to her, Ashley would revert back to the shell of a woman she saw in that dingy club office.

Ashley had never been so scared in her life. Not for herself, she never worried about herself in those situations. It had been her life for so long, so the idea about worrying over her own death seemed silly. This did not mean she didn't protect herself, but she knew not to fear death. No, she was terrified for the blonde. Seeing her standing in that office, eyes wide with fear, knife pressed against her throat literally shocked Ashley to her core. Had she not been training since her adolescence, Ashley was sure the fear would have paralyzed her into non-action. It was a rare moment that she was grateful for her crazy father and her strange upbringing.

The brunette's fear didn't only rest in the idea of Spencer getting hurt, she was also terrified for how Spencer would react to her now. Ashley never wanted Spencer to see her in this spy world, let alone killing people right before her eyes. While the blonde was a doctor, and the image of blood and dead bodies was nothing new, Ashley knew that Spencer was one of the softest, most gentle, and caring people she had ever met. She healed people while Ashley killed them. Ashley was terrified this would be the last straw for Spencer; she would finally come to her senses and tell the brunette she never wanted to see her again.

Ashley knew she should be expecting a call from a very confused Madison in an hour or two depending on how long it took to clean up the scene. She had been able to give the girl a cover, a story that covered everyone's ass. It would work, but she knew she owed the Latina a number of answers for this one. Despite knowing that, the only thing that really plagued the brunette was Spencer, and Ashley's fear that Spencer was now disgusted with her.

But when the brunette looked into the cerulean blue eyes she longed for even in her sleep, she was only met with love and concern. It shocked Ashley. She could barely stand the intensity of the gaze, knowing that Spencer was so close to getting hurt, dying, because of all the shit Ashley had brought into her life. Ashley's eyes looked over the girl, noticing the small cut on the girl's throat from where the knife had been pressed, the bruises forming on her arms and neck from the god damn bartender's rough grasp. Ashley knew there was a small cut in the girl's lower back as well. It drove the brunette almost insane with guilt. She couldn't seem to find enough air.

Ashley quietly mumbled out "going to the bathroom to wash up" and hurriedly moved past the blonde to the bathroom, closing the door halfway; she wanted a moment to gather herself in privacy, but she was completely unwilling to let the blonde out of her immediate vicinity.

Ashley placed both hands on either side of the white, porcelain sink. She looked into the mirror; she saw her cut lip, and her right eye slightly beginning to swell. She mentally cursed because it seemed like she had just gotten her face back to normal. She looked down into the sink and replayed the events of the club. She was trembling with guilt, fear, remorse, love, everything. The idea of losing the blonde made her want to curl into a ball and die.

Ashley vaguely heard a knock on the hotel door, a call of room service, and Spencer ask them to leave the first aid kit at the door. After a moment Ashley could hear the door open and quickly close as Spencer probably grab whatever was left.

At this point Ashley was shaking from crying. It was quiet, but painful. She fought against the sobs that were working its way up throat, and continued to watch the sink catch the tears that fell down her face. She barely flinched when she felt arms wrap around her from behind; Spencer's soft hands gently easing her own away from the death grip she had on the sink. The blonde began to softly rock the brunette side to side, softly whispering "I love you's" and "it's all okay now's". Ashley stopped trying to fight it, she let the sobs come out, she let the blonde comfort her in a way Ashley knew only she could.

Ashley turned into the girl, her arms wrapping around her so tightly, her face burrowing into the girl's neck. Ashley placed her lips on the girl's pulse, finding so much comfort in its steady beating. It ensured that her love was alive, was okay, and that Ashley's involvement in Spencer's life hadn't condemned her to an early death.

When Ashley finally calmed down, her breathing back to normal, she pulled away from her girl, staring into her eyes. The brunette placed a hand over the blonde's beating heart, and gave a little smile when she felt it begin to race a little, assumingly, from their close contact.

Spencer could hear Ashley mumble, "I am so sorry." But the blonde only shook her head, "Ash, there is nothing to apologize for. I was so scared I would lose you today."

"Me too." The brunette whispered out. The brunette leaned in, giving the blonde the softest kiss she could, holding the girl like she was the most precious thing in the world. The blonde wanted more, wanted to feel Ashley against her, everywhere, but she was aware of the cut on the woman's lip, and she knew about the cut in the girl's leg, and her arm, and as much as she wanted to pull away and bandage the girl up, she literally couldn't find it in herself to break this contact.

Ashley pulled away, and her soft, golden brown eyes trailed down to Spencer's neck, where she leaned in and placed the softest kisses on the newly forming bruises. And after the brunette was certain she got each one, she again pulled away, bringing her hands to push off the leather jacket and pull up the blonde's shirt, stripping it off her. She saw the bruises forming on the girl's arms, and she kissed each one so softly.

Spencer's fingers gently traveled through the brunette's curls. She knew Ashley needed this. She saw the look of guilt; Spencer knew that the brunette had been terrified, but only for her, just as Spencer had only been scared for the brunette. It wasn't good, this self-sacrificing, your life is much more important than mine, attitude both girls had taken, but Spencer wasn't going to deny Ashley something she needed.

So when Ashley continued to strip her, she didn't stop the brunette. And when they slowly walked out of the bathroom and towards the bed, Spencer didn't protest. And when Ashley hissed in pain when she pulled her jeans off, Spencer allowed Ashley to ignore it. Because she knew that Ashley's cut could wait a little longer, and she knew their discussion could be held off for an hour more, Spencer knew that all Ashley needed right now was to feel the blonde's heart beating her in chest, to touch, and kiss, and reaffirm their love, to erase the terrible feel of goodbye. Spencer knew all this; she knew exactly what Ashley needed because it was exactly what she needed too.

* * *

The girls were tangled in sheets and around one another, their bare skin working hard to mesh into one body. Spencer had been allowed to bandage the spy, returning the favor of delicate kisses to the newly injured skin. The two were curled together, Spencer holding an ice pack precariously to the brunette's face in hopes of calming the slight swelling. They lay on the bed facing one another, their bare fronts pressed together.

They had been so quiet, simply reveling in the feel of having more time together. A soft sigh escaped Spencer's lips when she pulled the ice pack away, letting her fingers softly stroke the brunette's face.

Ashley knew it was her turn to be brave, to give Spencer what she needed, so she asked, "Are you okay? Tonight was crazy."

Spencer smiled a little, so appreciative and happy that the girl before her was trying. Spencer was a talker; she loved to talk things over, over analyze them, and then talk about them again, while Ashley was the complete opposite. The brunette liked to sit quietly and independently, think things over, and work through them on her own. It melted Spencer's heart knowing that Ashley was constantly putting herself out there for her own benefit. Spencer leaned over, giving the brunette a soft kiss.

"I'm okay. Honestly, the worst part, the part that will terrify me forever, is when I thought they had captured you. I never thought I would willingly go with a kidnapper, but the second he said your life was on the line, it felt as though I was basically dragging him through the club. I was just so scared."

Ashley nodded her head in understanding. It was so dangerous; their disregard for their own safety in exchange for the safety of the other, but Ashley assumed that was part of the reason why their bond was so tight.

"The only fear I have ever had since meeting you is you getting hurt. I can't stand the thought of it." Ashley admitted, her eyes boring into Spencer's.

Spencer moved closer to the girl, her face burrowing into the girl's neck, while Ashley's arms pulled the girl impossibly closer. Ashley felt, more than heard Spencer ask, "So now what?"

Ashley let out a sigh, bringing on hand up to work its way through the blonde locks.

"We see what Madison has to say, and then we go home. I can't come back to Los Angeles for a long time after this. But I think we are safe otherwise. We just have to see how things went with Madison."

The blonde nodded her head against Ashley, placing a kiss to the exposed flesh in front of her. Both girls eventually drifted off, still clinging to the other like a life raft.

* * *

Ashley's cell phone ringing woke the brunette up. Spencer was still curled into her, so the spy delicately extracted herself to find her discarded jeans, and ultimately, her cell phone on the floor near the bed.

Ashley let out a calming breathe before answering the phone.

Spencer groggily woke up to Ashley's whispered words. She was obviously hearing the tail end of the discussion, but it was enough.

"Yea Durate, I understand. And I do owe you one. I suppose we can meet. Location 27 still around? Okay, I will see you there in an hour."

The brunette turned towards the bed, her eyes fixed on Spencer's own. "It's rude to eavesdrop." The brunette said, eyebrow raised and a small smile on her face. It had been a heavy evening, and they both could use a little lightness. It was close to three in the morning, and it seemed as though they had so much to conquer before they could actually return home.

The blonde ignored the comment, sitting up in the bed.

"I'm coming." The blonde stated, trying to hide the panic in her voice and eyes. The idea of being separated from Ashley after a night like tonight literally terrified the blonde.

Ashley surprised the girl by simply replying, "I suppose you are." The brunette hated to admit it, but the idea of parting from the blonde scared her just as much, if not more than Spencer.

Spencer cocked her head to the side, slightly confused, but relieved that it wouldn't turn into a fight. Ashley slowly walked towards the bed, sitting on the edge, next to Spencer.

"I just can't let you out of my sight right now" the brunette offered as an explanation. Her hand rose to Spencer's face, slowly stroking the girl's jaw.

Spencer smiled softly in reply, simply thanking the girl, before leading both of them towards the shower to get ready to handle whatever came at them next, together.


	25. Burgers and Truths

**Hello all, long time, I know, and admit that I suck, but we are getting close to the end, and while I know how to end it everything until then is a little fuzzy, so forgive my writer's block/actual life getting in the way. Hope you enjoy this, and special thank you to sofianme, rebel scamp, imaferrari, Rachel2020 and everyone else that has stuck through with the story!**

**Chapter 25: Burgers and Truths**

Ashley was nervous. She kept fiddling with the collar of her jacket that was securely wrapped around her blonde. After showering and leaving the hotel room (which Ashley informed Spencer they would not be returning to) they walked approximately five blocks and stopped in front of a large parking garage.

Ashley simply led the girl inside, walked up to a beautiful, black BMW on the fifth floor, stuck her hand inside the exhaust and produced a car key. Spencer gave the brunette an amused look of disbelief to which the spy merely shrugged and said, "I have a bunch of hidden things through out this city."

Now they waited, in some sort of abandoned construction sight, for Madison to arrive. And while Spencer was nervous as well, she tried to keep calm for Ashley.

Ashley was terrified; she was bringing Spencer so much further into this world by allowing her to be in Madison's presence, but after what happened earlier tonight, Ashley was certain Spencer was safest when they were together. Their newfound disregard for the own safety made it impossible to leave the other alone in these situations.

Spencer slowly slid her hands over Ashley's, which were still fidgeting with the collar of the leather jacket. The blonde gave the girl a small smile, trying to calm her down. Ashley released a big sigh and rested her forehead against Spencer's.

"You look really good in this jacket." The brunette quietly whispered out, knowing she needed to pull herself together. The blonde smiled a little and gave the girl a small kiss replying, "Don't I know it." Ashley barked out a laugh, finding amusement in Spencer's cocky attitude and small smirk. After a beat of silence, the blonde finally had to ask.

"So, what's the plan here Ash? I mean, I think Madison is going to want to know who the hell I am."

Ashley's mind began running through the possibilities. She gave the blonde a once over and asked, "Do you know any languages besides English?"

"Um, I'm assuming 4 years of high school German and pig Latin don't count correct?" The blonde replied wincing a little at her own answer. Ashley gave her a lopsided grin while shaking her head, forever endeared to the blonde's cuteness.

"No, Madison knows German. Um, okay. British accent. You are MI-6, we met on a mission a while ago and I kept in contact. You have been helping me since the whole Aiden thing. Just try not to talk and remember you are Staci Carson."

Spencer's eyes were a little wide with fear, but she nodded her head. Ashley took a step back from the girl, exiting her personal space when she heard a car rumbling down the deserted road. Spencer looked at the brunette and Ashley gave her a calm smile, letting her know everything would be okay.

It never ceased to amaze the blonde how easily the two could switch from being the comforter to the comforted, but in this instance she was glad that Ashley had calmed down enough to allow her a small moment to freak out.

Both eyes turned towards the dark blue Porsche that pulled up. Spencer's eyebrow shot up when she took in the young Latina; she was hot. Spencer had to fight down the sudden swell of jealousy that ran through her. _Definitely not the time Carlin_.

Ashley stood in front of Spencer, blocking Madison's full view of the girl. Spencer could see the tenseness in the girl's shoulders and she struggled with herself to not reach out to rub the brunette's back as a means of comfort.

Madison's eyes were trained on Ashley. They briefly flickered towards the blonde, her eyebrow quirking up as well, but refocused on the ex spy in front of her. Madison took the girl in, despite the injuries to her face, and the blood stained jeans, she looked good. There was something about her that had changed. The dark, brooding coldness the brunette was famous for now seemed a little forced, and Madison could not imagine what could have happened to Ashley for that part of her persona to change.

When Madison was finally in front of Ashley, Spencer could tell the girl fought the urge to hug the brunette. Spencer felt a pang of sympathy for the Latina. Ashley had informed her that she had always been pretty cold while working at the CIA and Madison was constantly trying to befriend her in their time working together. Ashley admitted that the brunette was the closest thing to a friend she had, and Spencer assumed the young Latina thought of Ashley as a friend. It must feel terrible not being allowed to hug a friend you thought you had lost.

Finally, a smile broke out on Madison's face, "Despite the circumstances, it is good to see you alive Davies. You had me worried there for a while."

"You too Durate, I didn't think you could last a week without me saving your ass." Ashley replied. Spencer could tell there was a smug grin on her face, but was shocked to hear her voice sound so cold and lifeless. Ashley's voice was always so warm and sweet when they were talking, and Spencer was shocked to find out that is another part of Ashley she saved just for her.

"Well, if I remember correctly, it was your dumb ass that called me tonight asking for a bail out. What the fuck was that? And who is the blonde?"

Ashley still shifted slightly in front of Spencer, hoping to protect her in any way she could.

"This is Staci Carson, MI6. We met in London a while back and she has been helping me since the incident with Dennison."

Madison gave Spencer a slight head nod in acknowledgment before turning her gaze back to the brunette, obviously waiting for an explanation. Ashley let out a sigh and tried to order all the facts and conclusions she had come to in the past two weeks.

"We were at the club, not for any reason other than being at a club. I figured since it was mob owned I would be fine, but obviously a wrench was thrown into the plan. Over the past two weeks, I have noticed, and Carson agrees with me, that something is going on with the LA branch.

Those four morons are in charge now, as you know, and there have been a number of deaths and hires in the branch that is unprecedented. I think Snider, along with the rest of those goons are stacking the CIA with their own men, and are working with the mob, to say the least."

Madison gave her a somewhat skeptical look; Ashley wasn't surprised in the slightest. The brunette could hear Spencer shifting behind her. The blonde was aware of Ashley's suspicions, they had been discussing and researching what was going on together, but the tie to the mob was new, obviously gained from whatever transpired in the club. Spencer was just as interested as Madison to hear what brought her to this conclusion.

"Ashley, I know you hate Snider after he got you suspended for breaking protocol, but I don't think that-"

Ashley cut Madison off, "Its not about that. I could give a rat's ass that he got me suspended, right now I am trying to tell you that they are up to something."

Ashley reached towards her back; pulling out the gun she stole from the security guard in the bathroom, and gently tossed it to Madison. Ashley contemplated handing it to the girl, but any plan that involved her stepping away from the blonde was one that was quickly dismissed.

"When I found Rick, he said Geoff had just left. They were to meet with Snider and Blake. He implied they were working with the part of the mob that owned the club; that is how I was identified. Apparently those morons had put a hit out on me through the mob, but decided to take care of it themselves. They said I wouldn't fit into their new CIA. They killed Chief too, when he found out what happened to me.

When I was taking out one of the guards he had that gun on him. It is CIA issued. The security guard in the office with Rick had a CIA gun too. I set it up so Snider and Blake would believe Geoff did the shooting, I left the gun there too so everyone could see someone from the CIA had been there. I am hoping they will all turn on each other now. I'm sorry for the mess Madison, but we didn't have a lot of options."

Madison was slowly nodding her head, trying to take in the information while looking over the gun. She hated this; the CIA was supposed to be good, and now four assholes were breaking that. She felt so helpless.

Madison tossed back the gun. "Don't worry, I got there in time and no one is really asking questions. They assumed it was a mob CIA shoot out, that Rick and I were at the wrong place at the wrong time. Blake showed up, and seemed freaked out after seeing Rick, but I couldn't place why. So what is the next step, how do we stop this?"

Ashley put the gun back in place and contemplated her response. She didn't want to get anymore involved in this. She should just let it be, and make sure she and Spencer were safe. That is the best chance of survival; it is what the old Ashley would do. But she felt the nagging sensation of how wrong all of this was, how many innocent people have died, and could die if no one stopped it.

Spencer saw Ashley's shoulders tense further. She knew the brunette was weighing her options, but Spencer knew in her heart, despite whatever danger they would get thrown into, what the right thing to do was. If they, in anyway, could stop this and protect others, they should. Without wanting to be completely obvious to Madison, but still convey to Ashley what they should do, Spencer took a step forward, bringing herself almost right against Ashley, but still slightly behind her. The blonde's hand discreetly ran across the brunette's back, hoping the simple touch would give the girl the strength to do the right thing rather than the most logical.

Ashley looked up at Madison, her eyes strong and fiery. With such a simple act, Spencer was able to give Ashley everything she needed.

"We need someone outside this branch to help. If these guys are the heads of the department of the LA branch, we need allies in other places. I know someone in D.C. I can call, just to get the ball rolling. We don't need to do much, just plant the seed and leave a trail, and hopefully we can reveal everything once they catch up.

You are going to need to stay in the branch, I will continue to monitor everything I can, as I have been, but you being there will help. But remember Durate, they are killing people, our people. The second you feel something, just run, not a word to anyone, just go. We can regroup and I can keep you safe."

Madison nodded her head knowing that Ashley was already fifteen steps ahead with her plan anyways. Spencer was trying not to beam at the brunette, love and pride swelling in her.

"I'm going to call my D.C. contact and try and set something up, I don't want her to know I am alive yet, but I want her to think I am somehow sending her this information. I'll only be a few seconds."

Ashley's hand lightly brushed Spencer's own, trying to offer the girl some reassurance before stepping away from the two. Madison moved towards Spencer, offering her hand.

"Hi, I'm Madison Durate. Sorry about Davies, she doesn't have the best social skills or etiquette."

Spencer smiled at the girl; it was nice to know not everyone in the CIA was as serious as Ashley. Spencer mustered up her best British accent and replied, "Staci, it is nice to meet you. Ashley has actually talked about you a lot."

Madison gave the girl a look Spencer couldn't really place, and asked, "When did you meet Ashley again?"

"Oh, two years ago, in London, like she said." And before Spencer could even register what was happening Madison was behind her with a knife to her throat. Spencer almost groaned out loud, _Not this again_ is all the blonde could think.

By this time Ashley had turned around and was walking back towards the girls when she saw the knife go to Spencer's throat. Ashley was in front of the girls gun aimed at Madison's head faster than she thought was possible.

"Ashley! It's a fake accent! This bitch is lying-"

"Madison, because I respect you, I am going to say this once and count to three. Let her go, or make no mistake, I will put a bullet between your eyes."

Madison hesitated for a moment, but she knew the look in Ashley's eyes was deadly serious, so she practically shoved the blonde towards the angry spy.

Ashley's arm instantly wrapped around Spencer's waist, and Madison watched in rapt fascination as Spencer buried her face into Ashley's neck, returning the hug. Ashley was whispering something to her, a gentle hand soothingly rubbing the blonde's back; Madison almost fainted as she watched the blonde began to laugh at something Ashley said. Madison saw how almost everything about Ashley's body language changed; the soft, tenderness that came when dealing with the blonde. Madison could see Ashley's shoulders relax the longer the two stayed in contact, and the air of complete trust and protection the brunette poured onto the blonde. It was something Madison had never imagined to see on Ashley Davies, CIA super spy.

Ashley's heart was finally going back to a normal rate. Never in her life did she want to see Spencer in that position, let alone twice in one night. Ashley knew she probably shouldn't be acting this way in front of Madison, but the fear in Spencer's eyes threw all of that out of the window. Spencer needed her, and Ashley would be damned if she let her down, so the brunette hugged the girl, and softly whispered, "Can't leave you alone for two minutes huh?" hoping to get a laugh from the blonde. She sighed in relief when she felt Spencer's laugh against her neck. Spencer slowly extracted herself from the brunette, and stood next to her while their hands remained linked together.

Ashley finally looked up at Madison after raking her eyes over Spencer to make sure she was okay. The poor Latina looked so shocked and confused that the anger almost completely drained out of Ashley. Almost. Spencer had to fight off a laugh after looking at Madison; it was the same dopey look Glen got when he found out the Lakers had cheerleaders too.

Madison finally composed herself and said, "What the fuck was that?"

Ashley gave the girl a half grin and replied, "Is Amy's still open? If I have to tell you the entire truth might as well be over a burger and fries."

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It was silent. Madison, Spencer, and Ashley didn't speak during the car ride to Amy's, and they continued their silence until an unamused looking waitress in her late 50's asked for their orders.

"I'll have the cheeseburger, extra pickles, and a coke." The brunette mumbled.

Spencer closed her menu, "And I'll have a patty melt, with BBQ sauce on the side and an iced tea."

Madison vaguely recalled order something, more doing it to rid the table of the waitress, rather than out of actual hunger. She was ready to hear what the fuck was going on, and wanted the truth, which is why she refused to go in separate cars, and why she was silent this entire time waiting for the two to start explaining.

Ashley and Spencer sat on the same side of the booth, looking at Madison a little hesitantly. It was overwhelming and exciting to think that someone other than them would hear what had happened, to finally get some sort of truth out there. Spencer seemed to be bouncing with nervous energy.

Ashley had driven them to a dive diner a little bit away from the beach. There wasn't another soul in the restaurant, other than themselves and the staff, but then again it was getting close to 5:00 in the morning, and it would be the rare person that would be craving a milkshake right now.

Ashley looked over at the blonde, seeing the excitement in her eyes. It was nothing new for Ashley to have no one to talk to, to keep all new developments about her life to herself, but the brunette could tell that Spencer was having trouble with it. Ashley gave the girl a half grin, lightly squeezed her thigh to get those baby blues to fix on her right now.

Ashley leaned into Spencer, a little grateful that she no longer had to hold herself back in front of Madison, and said, "We need to tell Madison the truth. I'm going to leave it up to you."

Spencer's whole face light up at the thought of finally getting to tell someone about their relationship. She was allowed to gush about this all, and to do it in her own words with the actual truth. It was as if a weight she didn't even know she was carrying was about to be taken away; she had to fight the urge to kiss the brunette within an inch of her life.

Spencer turned back to Madison, who with a curious expression and an expect gaze, waited to hear what was going on. Spencer reached her hand across the table, waiting for Madison to shake it.

"Dr. Spencer Carlin, girlfriend to one Ms. Ashley Davies." And even though Madison had somewhat pieced that together after their displays, it was still shocking and unsettling to hear. _So Robocop had a girlfriend… _

And before Madison could even utter a word, Spencer began speaking at a speed that was unsettlingly fast, and Madison listened. She watched as Ashley gave little amused smiles at the blonde and her explanations about Garfield cartoons, somersaults in hotel rooms, broken toasters, books, candles, cars, piñatas, and BBQ's, and ultimately about love. About fighting their feelings and losing terribly, about Chelsea and Chelsea's Ashley (whoever the hell they were), and about days in bed, and nights up and talking about dreams.

Madison watched the blonde talk, not just with her hands, but her whole body. Painting a picture of their story, words laced with love, and hate, desperation and frustration, and ultimately a bond neither girl could have imagined. Madison saw the way Ashley listened to Spencer with almost as much fascination as she herself showed. The spy had never been happier for the crappy service of the always-empty diner as she was in that moment.

And as the waitress put down their food, Spencer finally said, "And then we left the hotel to meet up with you."

Spencer finally let out a sigh, relieved to have gotten everything out, even if it was to a relative stranger. She had given the girl her version of the story, adding details that were definitely not necessary, but they were feelings Spencer was dying to let out, and leaving out details that were too intimate, or simply too sweet to give away to anyone. Details she hoped would forever remain between the brunette and the blonde. Ashley had been silent during the entire retelling, as had Madison, but she could feel both of them hanging on to every word she said.

Madison took a moment to let her brain catch up to the story. She watched silently as Spencer placed the side of BBQ sauce on Ashley's plate, and Ashley take all the pickles out of her burger with a grimace as she put them on Spencer's. The girls began eating their meals, Spencer occasionally drinking her tea, and then taking a sip of Ashley's coke while Ashley drenched her burger in BBQ sauce. They seemed to have forgotten about Madison's presence, or easily ignored it while the girl watched on.

So, Spencer was what brought about the change in Ashley, Madison realized. And it was clear to see the devotion that the girl had. The Latina recalled her protective stance when they first met, Madison's eyes raked over the infamous brown leather jacket Spencer was wearing instead of Ashley, she recalled the gentle hand that rested on Spencer's leg as they drove to Amy's, and the quick scan of the restaurant Ashley did before opening the diner door for the girl. It was sweet, sickenly so, but Madison would have never imagined it in a hundred years.

The brunette super spy, always serious, always brooding, was a lovesick puppy, and to this Dr. Spencer Carlin, no less. Madison always just thought of Ashley as an asexual being, never actually needing human contact, but this all seemed right, and to work. Spencer's happy, bubbly, even goofy persona matched Ashley, and complimented her so well. And it broke Madison's heart knowing that maybe that I the kind of person Ashley was before her involvement in the CIA, and whatever else happened in her life. Madison had tried for years to try and get at least part of this side from Ashley that the blonde doctor easily got all of. And while she knew Ashley respected her more than most, and while Madison easily trusted her life and anything she had with Ashley, she never saw anything of the brunette like she saw right now.

And when Madison saw Ashley steal a fry from Spencer's plate while the blonde gave her a look of absolute horror, she couldn't stop herself from laughing uncontrollably. Both girls across the booth stopped their playful fighting to look at the spy across from them with confused faces.

Madison looked up at the couple, seeing their confused and slightly horrified looks, and just continued to laugh even harder. After a few moments, she was able to pull herself together and look at the two.

"I'm sorry, but honestly, if you told me a month ago that Robocop, the CIA bred super spy, was in love, and whipped no less, I would have died on the spot." Madison let out wiping the tears that had formed in her eyes.

Spencer let out a small giggle, while Ashley huffed a little leaning back in the booth, her arms crossed a deadly look on her face. Spencer turned towards the brunette, still slightly laughing, and leaned back as well, bumping her shoulders with the girl. Ashley angry look melted slightly, as Spencer loosened one of her arms to hold onto. And when the blonde placed a quick kiss on the brunette's shoulder, Ashley lost all traces of anger and gave a soft, half smile.

This only caused Madison to laugh again barely getting out, "And I rest my case!" Ashley only rolled her eyes, and wrapped her arm around Spencer's shoulder when the blonde tried to move away from her so she wouldn't embarrass the girl further.

"Shut it Durate, or else Spencer finds out what happened when we were in Vancouver two years ago."

Madison immediately stopped laughing at sat up straight in the booth. Ashley had a smug little grin on her face after seeing that. The meal continued on. It was nice and light, and Spencer was intrigued to talk with someone from Ashley's past. The three were sitting, mindlessly chatting after the table had been cleared when Ashley excused herself to use the restroom. Spencer's eyes followed Ashley, wincing slightly as she watched the brunette walk with a slight limp to her step.

Madison smiled softly at the blonde. Despite having no spy skills at all, Spencer watched Ashley with almost the same amount of protectiveness as Ashley did with Spencer. It was endearing to say the least.

"You are good for her you know." Spencer's eyes left Ashley's retreating form and met Madison's. The blonde gave the girl a slight head tilt and a questioning gaze, urging her to explain.

"I've known Ashley for years. And in those years I can't even count how many times we have both come close to dying, being tortured, and a number of other things that would assumingly bring us close together, but I have never seen her with anyone the way she is with you.

She was known around the office as heartless and cold, and while I knew she was quiet, and kept to herself, I also knew she wasn't heartless. She just protected herself. Even with me, her walls never came down, she didn't even let me think I could glance behind them, but with you, it is like you blew them all up and only you can stroll on by the debris. It is mind boggling."

Spencer smiled at the girl's words. She knew it was an up hill battle for Ashley to allow the openness that she allowed with her, and Spencer was grateful for it. She saw an Ashley that no one has even seen, and Spencer one day hoped others would be allowed to see (to a certain extent).

Spencer simply replied to the girl, "She is the best thing that has ever happened to me."

Madison smiled at the words. She had to fight the urge to give this sweet blonde doctor the over-protective friend chat because Madison knew that Spencer would do more to keep Ashley safe than anyone else in the world would. After a beat of silence Spencer finally had to ask, "Madison, what did Ashley do to get suspended?"

Madison looked down at the table a little sheepishly before replying, "In the CIA we are trained to be cold, get in, do the mission by any means necessary and get out. Simple as that. They have a rule, or protocol that states while on mission if your partner or anyone else gets separated or captured to leave them behind. It is worse if they have two agents rather than one, you know?"

Spencer nodded her head, letting Madison know she was still following and with a sigh the Latina continued, "We were in Spain" Spencer tensed at the mention of the country in regards to Ashley, "and I had gotten separated and captured while Ashley managed to escape. She knew the rules; she was supposed to continue on, leave me behind and go back home. She broke them to save my life. She came back, going ape shit on everyone and only stopped when they threatened to kill me, so she told them she was higher up in the ranks, and was the better agent to keep. She said either let me go and take her instead, or she would blow us all up with a grenade she had. They took her, and while I was fighting to stay, she grabbed me and whispered in my ear, 'Don't come back, don't fight, consider me dead. The last thing I ask of you is to walk away and not turn back.'

So I honored her wishes and a few days later, I have no idea how to this day, she ended up almost dead at one of the safe houses. After she recovered, she was suspended for going back for me by Snider."

Spencer's mind raced and her heart swelled. Her girl, her spy, her best friend, and the love of her life was honestly the best person in the world and it made Spencer want to cry and laugh simultaneously. Madison gave the blonde a small smile. Of course Ashley would never admit to Spencer how truly amazing and badass she was.

Ashley returned to the booth giving both girls a smile and she slid in next to Spencer, offering the doctor a gentle kiss to her temple. Spencer smiled at Ashley; her eyes slightly watering before making the brunette scoot out again so she could compose herself in the bathroom.

Ashley watched Spencer walk towards the bathroom, knowing the tears weren't sad ones, but happy ones, but still looked to Madison with a questioning eyebrow lift.

"What the hell is that about?"

Madison smiled at Ashley, relieved that the brunette wasn't going to murder her upon finding Spencer with tears in her eyes, "I have no idea, homegirl is crazy."

Ashley simply rolled her eyes. Madison was grateful for the chance to speak to Ashley alone, "Love looks good on you Davies. But are you sure, absolutely positive that this is what you want? That you can handle this?"

Ashley looked at her old partner with appreciation. The brunette liked that Madison seemed slightly worried that the blonde would end up being hurt rather than herself; the more people looking out for Spencer the better in the brunette's mind.

"There is nothing I want more in the world than to protect her and make her happy. It is as simple as that Madison. And I am trusting you. Trusting you with my entire world in your hands, and if I find out that you in any way betray her I will devote everything to wrecking you."

Madison met the girl's cold glare with one of her own, much less intense, and slightly faltering, but the best she could manage. "No need for threats Davies, I like her more than you anyways."

Ashley smiled at that. Madison continued on, "So your contact in DC, you will let me know how that goes?" Ashley nodded her head.

"You have my number now, you can call me if anything happens, and I will keep in touch more now that you know what is going on," Ashley replied, but her eyes quickly flicked away from the girl across from her to the girl making her way towards their booth. Madison rolled her eyes, but smiled softly at the lack of attention span these two seemed to have when around one another. She knew they probably wanted a minute.

"Davies, dinner/breakfast is on you. I going to grab a smoke before we leave, you two just meet me outside."

Ashley nodded her head in acknowledgement, but kept her eyes trained on Spencer to make sure she was okay, that whatever the blonde and the Latina had discussed in her absence didn't upset the blonde too much.

Madison quickly retreated, while Spencer slide into the booth next to Ashley again. Ashley wrapped an arm around Spencer's shoulders while the blonde curled into Ashley's side, her forehead resting on the other girl's neck, her arm wrapping around the brunette's stomach.

"You okay?" Ashley quietly murmured into the top of the blonde's head. Spencer nodded and gave the brunette a little kiss on the neck to let her know she was okay. Ashley's arm around the girl tightened slightly at the contact.

"Long night, huh?" Ashley said, looking out of the window at Madison smoking at the sun slowly beginning to come out for the day. Spencer again gave a little nod.

They were quiet for a minute before Ashley said, "I am just going to move us to Jamaica and we won't have to worry about anything ever again." The blonde laughed at that smiling at the thought of hiding away with Ashley forever.

"You are going to have to face the wrath of Chelsea if you take me out of the country. And you know she will find us."

The brunette shuttered at the thought of having to deal with an angry Chelsea, which only caused the blonde to laugh a little harder. They were quiet again, and this time Spencer's eyes took in the Latina quietly smoking outside, seemingly soaking in the fresh rays of light making their way towards the restaurant.

Spencer smiled a little devilishly and pinched the brunette's sides slightly.

"Ow! What was that for?" The brunette questioned, more in shock that Spencer pinched her rather than actual pain.

"You never told me Madison was that hot!" The blonde exclaimed slightly angry, slightly joking, and slightly jealous of all the time the two had probably spent together in the past.

Ashley laughed at the blonde loving that after all this, after seeing Spencer in life threatening situation twice within twelve hours, they could still be happy and light; that they could still simply be Spencer and Ashley.

Ashley's lips went to the top of the blonde's head once more and whispered, "You think she is hot? You should see my new partner."

Spencer smiled at the response, praising the brunette for her slick words with another chaste kiss to her neck before replying, "Let's get your stuff from the apartment and go home Ash."

Spencer slide out of the booth, her hand sliding down to gently grasp Ashley's, so she could pull her along. When both girls her standing, stuck in one of their staring contests, the brunette simply whispered, "Yea, let's go home."


	26. The Jump

**I am so sorry for the massive delay between chapters, but to make up for it, this chapter is a monster (16 pages, longest one yet) AND I waited to post this until I finished the entire story! So after this chapter there are only two more and an epilogue! Special thank you to the random comments I got in my disappearing act and to Ashley who encouraged me to get off my lazy ass! I hope you enjoy, and I will post the next chapter as soon as I get motivation to edit it. Sorry for any errors!**

Chapter 26: The Jump

Spencer hummed happily to herself as she waited to flip the chocolate chip pancake. She was excited, and impatient. The blonde never thought she would be able to pull this off (keeping a secret from a spy seemed like a terribly difficult task), but she had, and now she finally got to show off her hard work.

It had been a few weeks since their trip to Los Angeles, and things were almost back to normal, well, normal for them. During that time, Spencer's apartment had slowly transformed into their apartment; Spencer's couch had been replaced with Ashley's; the kitchen had received a dramatic upgrade; book shelves were purchased; music collections were integrated; things changed, but the one thing both women immediately agreed upon was they were not getting rid of the ikea dinning table.

Every time Spencer walked through their home and saw a small knick-knack from some random part of the world, or a spotted Ashley' favorite mug, the blonde couldn't help but smile. She had always imagined moving in with someone, being forced to share her space, as a terrible ordeal, but it was something she loved doing with Ashley.

Spencer eyed the clock knowing she needed to hurry if she wanted to get everything right. In the weeks that followed the trip from hell, Ashley had closely followed any and all activity in the CIA world. About two weeks after they left L.A., Geoff had mysteriously died. There was no doubt in any of their minds that it was the doing of Snider and Blake. They were turning on one another, and it made finding cracks in their façade that much easier. Ashley had slowly been sending pieces of evidence to her contact in D.C., trying to get the girl to follow the breadcrumbs to the truth.

One good thing had come out of the entire mess in Los Angeles. Madison had become a presence in the girls' lives. Ashley would talk to her almost daily about any and all spy related things, while Spencer got to chat with Madison about normal everyday things. It was Madison, in fact, that had inadvertently started the blonde on her epic surprise.

Spencer enjoyed talking to Madison, but what Spencer really loved was this unfiltered source to and about Ashley. Spencer had asked Madison about three weeks ago when Ashley's actual birthday was, and the Latina was more than happy to provide the blonde with the date, and thus plans upon plans were drafted by the excited young doctor. She had a little over 8 minutes before Ashley's birthday officially began, and she was determined to make this the best one the brunette had ever had.

It often occurred to Spencer just how much the brunette had done for her, and how lucky she was to have Ashley in her life. It wasn't only the big things, like fixing the Mustang, it was the everyday things; the coffee that greeted her in the morning, the bonding with her family, the single flower she would find when she opened her purse. It was Ashley dealing with her particular brand of crazy with a loving smile and a tender kiss.

Spencer smiled fondly remembering the exact moment she realized how absolutely perfect the brunette was. It was last Thursday, and the blonde had woken up at around midnight with the sudden urge to write about the dream she was having. She rolled out a bed, giving the grumbling brunette a quick kiss as apology for leaving and made her way to the dining table. After writing for about an hour, she went online and received an IM from Chelsea. It wasn't surprising that the other girl was up; she often painted late into the night.

About an hour and a half later the blonde and Chelsea were both sitting on top of the kitchen island, an obscene amount of Chinese food surrounding them while they chatted away. Ashley walked in, bed head and pajamas on, and gave both girls a soft smile when she saw realized what all the noise was. Ashley made her way over to the blonde, her arm snaking around her waist, shaking her head when Spencer began to apologize. The brunette rested a kiss on the blonde's hair and stole her fork to take a bite of her lo mein, never once questioning why this was happening, let alone happening at nearly three in the morning.

That night was definitely one of the reasons why the next 24 hours needed to go perfectly. Ashley loved her; every crazy, ugly, weird detail of her, and Spencer would try forever to be worthy of such unyielding love and support. Spencer flipped the last pancake onto the plate, and arranged all the food on the tray she had prepared.

Spencer slowly made her way into their bedroom, placing the tray on the dresser, so she could greet her girl properly. Spencer knelt by Ashley's side of the bed, softly stroking the hair out of Ashley's face, "Ash. Ashley, stop pretending to be asleep. I know you woke up the second I touched the door knob." Spencer said, a small smile forming.

Ashley may have stopped attacking her when she was startled from sleep, but that didn't mean Ashley had turned off her creepy Superman hearing. Brown eyes softly fluttered open and met the cool ocean blue one's that Ashley loved so very much. Spencer leaned in, giving the brunette a tender, sweet kiss.

"Happy birthday Ash." Spencer whispered, smiling when she saw Ashley's eyes widen in surprise before she softly smiled back. Spencer got up and retrieved the tray, only to settle it down on the, now, upright brunette.

"Spencer, its midnight and you are waking me up with breakfast in bed?" The brunette questioned, highly amused with the situation. She laughed out loud when she saw the candles covering her pancakes.

"Davies, I can't believe you tried to get away with not telling me it was your birthday! Celebrating birthdays might be one of my favorite things in the world to do, so I needed to make sure your energy levels would remain high all day. And, well, I figured you have never been woken up at midnight for your birthday with chocolate chip pancakes. Now blow out your damn candles."

Ashley did as instructed, with a sense of nostalgia washing over her. It had been 21 years since she last blew out birthday candles; it had been 21 years since she had bothered to notice it was her birthday. Ashley was so grateful to have someone give her all these moments again.

"I'm surprised you didn't give me Poptarts." The brunette said, grinning while she ate her pancakes, offering some to the blonde, who happily obliged.

After chewing, the blonde replied, "While Poptarts are the breakfast of champions, I figured you'd appreciate this."

Ashley could only laugh as they finished their meal together in bed. The tray was soon discarded, and the brunette found herself on her back, Spencer lying on top of her, chin resting on her chest. Ashley began to thread her hands through the blonde, messy hair.

"Now what Boss?" The brunette asked, curious as to what Spencer had planned.

With a mischievous glint in her eyes, Spencer replied, "We have a few hours to kill. I didn't want to take too much of your beauty rest considering how old and decrepit you are now."

Ashley scoffed at the girl, slightly offended at the playful remark. She quickly flipped their positions, now hovering above the younger girl. Spencer gave the girl a playful smile and said, "Careful Ash, wouldn't want you to break a hip."

The blonde's laughter was effectively silenced when Ashley gave her a heated kiss. The brunette could still feel Spencer smiling into the kiss, but it soon vanished when Ashley's hands began to roam the blonde's body. Ashley gave herself a point for the small victory.

"I know exactly how to use the time," Ashley whispered, her voice dripping with desire before she leaned down, her lips meeting Spencer's once again. Ashley's tongue slowly made its way into blonde's mouth, the lingering taste of pancakes and strawberries mixing together with something that was distinctly Spencer. The brunette eventually broke the kiss, and looked down at the slightly out of breath and disheveled girl.

Ashley smirked, snorted out an "old and decrepit my ass" before leaning back down to meet Spencer's lips. After all, they did have a few hours to kill.

* * *

Ashley woke up to a soft tap on her forehead, scampering feet, and slight giggling. The brunette's hand went up to her forehead, only to find a post-it stuck there. The spy began to smile when she read "follow the arrows… if you dare" in Spencer's messy scrawl. It was now 9:30 in the morning of her 29th birthday, and she was excited (terrified) as to what the blonde had planned.

Ashley's legs swung over the side of the bed, and scattered along the floor were neon arrows, leading her out of the bedroom and into the dining room/living room area. She grinned when she saw Spencer sitting on top of the dining table behind an entirely too large, lopsided chocolate cake, with (assumingly) 29 candles lit. Ashley's eyes followed the arrows, which lead to on top of the dining table as well, with a large hand drawn stop sign lying directly in front of the cake. With a slight grin and a small eye roll, the brunette climbed the table sitting directly in front of her cake and staring right at the happy blonde.

"Spence, your obsession with _Sixteen Candles_ is getting a little out of hand."

Spencer simply rolled her eyes and replied, "Shut up and blow out your candles," and then a wicked little smile made its way on to her face as she continued, "or do you need a fire extinguisher to get them all?"

Ashley's let out a large laugh before she hunched over and blew out the candles on her cake. As they both worked to pull out all the candles, Ashley had to know, "So how many more times am I going to blow out candles."

Spencer smiled a little sheepishly and said, "Well, let's just say anyone having a birthday within the next week will have some trouble finding candles in town." Ashley, again, laughed at this, but stopped when she noticed the serious look on Spencer's face. Lifting her eyebrow at the expression, Spencer simply grabbed the spy's hand and replied softly, "I just want to make sure all your wishes come true." The blonde then ducked her head down blushing, as she busied herself with the plates and cutting the cake.

Ashley stopped the girl's movements and gave her a soft kiss. Both girls were still a little bashful when it came to sprouting the sincere, corny thoughts they both had, but it didn't stop them from sharing.

Ashley noticed the blonde only burned herself once while making the cake; it was probably a record for Spencer. Despite that, they happily munched on cake when Spencer questioned, "Have you ever eaten cake for breakfast before?" The brunette grinned and shook her head no. The blonde's smile widened at hearing this, "Good because today, for your wonderful day of birth, I am giving you a day of firsts! So hurry and eat your breakfast, so you can go shower and get ready for the day. Normal, casual clothing please. There is so much to do!" Spencer was getting more and more excited the longer she thought about their plans and was soon a fidgety mess. Ashley gave the girl an amused look.

"Spence, how many cups of coffee have you had today?"

"One."

"Okay, two."

"Fine, jeez, five!"

"And maybe one more after the fifth cup."

Ashley shook her head in amusement at the crazy girl sitting in front of her. She slowly got off the table after finishing her (large) piece of cake. Before Spencer could scramble off the table, Ashley made her way to the girl, and kissed her, slowly, passionately, and with love. Pulling back slightly, their foreheads resting against one another, Ashley's nose softly nuzzling the girl's cheek she whispered, "Thank you Spencer, for everything." And with one final peck, Ashley made her way towards the bathroom to get ready for her day, leaving a slightly dazed blonde sitting on top of the dining table.

* * *

When the brunette emerged from the bedroom, fully dressed and ready for her day, she was met with silence. After calling out Spencer's name a few times, she realized she was alone. A quick scan around the living room led the spy to finally notice the neon green arrow pointing at the front door. Letting out a little laugh, Ashley opened the front door, expecting to see a smiling blonde, but found more arrows.

Ashley began to chuckle when she noticed neon arrows leading her towards the park. The arrows ran through the town, taped to the asphalt of the street, stuck in lawns, hanging from weighted balloons, and even covering traffic signs. Ashley was amazed Spencer was able to hang up so many arrows, let alone in such a public space.

The brunette smiled as she followed them through the town. She reached one arrow placed delicately on top of a gift-wrapped box with a small tag reading "To Copperhead, with all my love, Black Mamba." Ashley opened the present only to be met with a shinning plastic princess tiara. Ashley smiled as she pulled it out, noticing writing scrawled on the box beneath the gift: "If you don't put this on, I will be forced to use my bad ass spy moves on you. No one messes with the Mamba." Ashley felt absolutely crazy laughing as hard as she was alone in the street.

As Ashley strolled through the small town (tiara on her head) strangers gave her giant, knowing grins, greeting her with "Happy birthday's" and "Spencer is up to it again, huh?" It was wonderful and unsettling all at once.

The brunette found another present resting in the grass, balloons attached. Ashley picked it up, rolling her eyes, but smiling when she realized Spencer had wrapped an old wooden cane, the note attached simply read: "You will be needing this soon enough."

The brunette continued her journey, following the arrows, and heard her destination rather than saw it. She could hear music blasting, and the laughing and screaming of children, the loudest one being Spencer. Ashley's eyes finally fell upon the scene. Near the picnic tables and BBQ pits Spencer was being chased by a heard of laughing children.

The blonde had set up a party for her in the park. Ashley saw Arthur safe guarding the cooler with an amused expression on his face as he watched his youngest daughter being attacked by cute, little children. Chelsea was painting the faces of the kids who couldn't be bothered to run around in circles with the blonde, while Clay and Glen were setting up what looked like a My Little Pony piñata.

Spencer, running for her life, looked up and finally noticed the brunette had joined them. Shrieking out "AAASSSHHHHLLLLEEEYYYYY," she ran full speed (tripping only once) towards her wonderful spy, quickly hiding behind her in hopes of gaining some protection.

Ashley laughed while Spencer practically climbed onto her back and swarms of kids ran after them. The group of 7 or 8 children chasing them soon brought down the two women. They were all sort of a lump on the ground, laughing when Arthur finally called a truce between everyone and the children quickly complied. Arthur asked the kids to wish Ashley a happy birthday, and kid after kid either gave Ashley a birthday hug, high-five, or small wave while introducing themselves.

Chelsea called the kids over for a game of Pin the Tail on Clay (much to his horror), so the couple finally got a moment to themselves.

"Spence."

"Ash." The blonde teased, seeing the love shinning in her girlfriend's eyes.

"When did you do all this? Who are these kids?" Ashley questioned stepping closer to the young doctor.

"I told you I love celebrating birthdays. And I figured you probably never got a full kid birthday in the park, at least not one for a while. So, some of the kids from the children's ward in the hospital were invited, and some of Dad's kids from the counseling center came, and here we are." Spencer got a little shy explaining part one of Ashley's big day.

Ashley smiled at the thought of not only getting the sweetest party, but also bringing some joy into the lives of all the children she had just met. Ashley looked around quickly to make sure no small eyes were staring, and gave Spencer a quick peck on the lips.

"Thank you. This is wonderful." Spencer looked at Ashley and smiled, fixing the tiara that had gone slightly askew.

"Anytime. I'm glad you found the gifts and the arrows."

"Yea, the cane should come in handy considering I had to run around with you on my back." Ashley replied with a small smirk on her face. Spencer only laughed, lacing their fingers together as they made their way to the group.

"Hey Spence, how exactly did you get all those arrows up? I mean, you literally had some hanging on traffic lights." The brunette questioned, still amazed that no one had cleaned up the mess Spencer had made.

Spencer began to blush slightly, "I may have brought it up at the town hall meeting when I asked you to get me a cookie from the bakery."

Ashley could only laugh.

* * *

A couple hours, a broken piñata, and an ice cream cake later the small party in the park had ended. Much to the amusement of the children, Ashley was able to break the piñata on her first try (with her new cane no less), despite the blindfold, and the spinning, and Clay and Glen trying their hardest to keep it from the brunette. Ashley merely smirked before making all the candy rain down.

The ice cream cake was giant. Spencer had mentioned needed something so big because of the _copious_ amount of candles Ashley's birthday required. She was met with eye rolls from Ashley and her brothers, a disbelieving scoff from her father, and Chelsea inappropriately calling Ashley a cougar for the rest of the party.

Glen had been given the task of ushering Ashley onto the next phase of Operation: Ashley's Birthday Spectacular (Glen fought the urge to roll his eyes over how lame Spencer could be). The two followed another set of neon arrows, leading them away from the park and back towards the town's square.

Ashley was having a wonderful day, and found it difficult to imagine what else Spencer had in mind for her. She knew it would be fairly easy to trick it out of the blonde boy walking with her, but decided she didn't want to ruin her blonde's hard work, so she remained quiet.

"I can't believe you have never had ice cream cake." Glen said, shaking his head in disbelief.

Ashley gave him a half smile, "I kind of had a weird childhood. My mom died when I was really young, and it sort of wrecked my dad."

Glen shifted a little awkwardly. He liked Ashley, he really did. So much so that if she ever hurt Spencer, he would be pretty sad while he slashed Ashley's tires in retaliation. Hearing the brunette talk about her sad childhood made him want to wrap the girl up in one of those Carlin bear hugs that make her squirm uncomfortably unless it is given by Spencer.

"Sucks dude."

Ashley smiled softly at Glen, nodding her head in agreement. Arthur had a special place in Ashley's heart, Clay while sweet, was terribly unaware, Chelsea still slightly terrified the brunette, but Glen, Glen was definitely her second favorite Carlin. His stunted maturity and overall secretly sensitive façade was something Ashley related to. He didn't ask her for the frills, and he didn't deal with the bullshit. With Glen you get what is front of you, and that was something Ashley found deep comfort in.

"Spence likes to go all out for birthdays. She always has. When we were growing up, she was the kid that loved making a terrible breakfast in bed for our parents on their birthday, you know, eggs with pieces of shell in it still, or half cooked pancakes.

"She got better at the stuff as we got older. I remember for Chelsea's 19th birthday, she got the chef of Chelsea's favorite restaurant in town to drive all the way up to Berkley with her because Chelsea missed the food while she was in college. And for Clay's 24th, while he was in law school, Spencer somehow managed to get him a key to the library so he could come and go as he pleased."

Ashley smiled. Loving birthdays and over the top displays of affection seemed right up the blonde's alley. "And for you? What has Spencer done for you?"

Glen smiled, "My 17th birthday, probably the best one. She some how managed to get the entire Varsity Cheerleading squad to come to my pool party."

Ashley laughed, "That's your best one?"

"Ashley! _Pool_ party. VARSITY Cheerleaders." Glen repeated, looking at Ashley like she was a mental patient for even questioning him.

The two walked along in silence for a little while longer, following the green arrows that paved their way. Glen shoved his hands in his pockets slowing his pace slightly,

"She is kind of amazing. Spencer, I mean. Well, I guess you know considering you moved in with her. But man, she is my rock. I could do anything when we were younger, push her, tease her, but she always had my back no matter what dumbass thing I did.

"She had applied all over the country for med school when Mom first got diagnosed; she got in everywhere, I think, even this fancy program in London. But as soon as she heard Mom was sick she accepted UCLA's offer because it was the closest to home. Mom was so proud of her when she graduated. I think Mom was even more proud of the stories Spencer wrote though. My mom and my dad are the only ones that Spencer let read her stuff.

"We all thought that Spencer would move somewhere far away after Mom died. She, again, had offers all over the country to work at different hospitals, but she didn't say a word and just accepted Mom's old position. I think it was her way of taking care of all of us. She has always been this kind of glue that has held our family together."

Ashley was listening to Glen with rapt fascination. Spencer was modest when it came to these things; the doctor had never mentioned all the opportunities she passed up for her family. Ashley had also never heard Glen speak so candidly about something heartfelt; she would have to remember to make fun of him later.

"Spencer has always been that type of person though. My parents use to say she trips and falls so much because she has such a big heart. She does have a giant heart, so it makes sense that she silently keeps us all together the way she does. And for better or worse she has folded you into the mix, so just know Spencer isn't the only family you have now, you have all of us."

The two had stopped near the local single screen movie theater. Ashley was kind of shocked silent while she regarded Glen's words. She had no idea what to say, how to thank this boy for those words and reassurances, so the brunette simply pulled him into a hug and whispered a soft "thank you".

The two pulled away while Spencer approached them. Spencer eyed her older brother suspiciously when she saw the look on her spy's face. Glen smiled, giving Ashley a small push, "Don't get all soft on me now Davies."

Ashley's arm slipped around Spencer's waist, "Don't worry Carlin. Only reason I put up with you is because you have a hot sister."

Glen let out a loud laugh while Spencer rolled her eyes at the two. Spencer then pulled Ashley towards the movies while thanking her brother for bringing Ashley there.

Spencer pulled Ashley along, passing the box office without a glance.

"Uh, Spence, I think you forgot about getting the tickets." Ashley replied, fixing her tiara that had gone slight askew from being pulled around.

Spencer gave Ashley a small smirk before replying, "You get a senior citizen discount right?" It was Ashley's turn to roll her eyes; Spencer ignored it. "Haven't you heard Ash? Tickets are for suckers."

Spencer led them right past the usher at the front door and straight to the concession stand, much to the brunette's relief/surprise. Spencer then proceeded to order an obscene amount of candy, popcorn, and drinks. And with one final pull, Spencer led them into the completely empty theater. They settled in the middle of the theater and Ashley finally gave the girl a questioning looking.

"Before I explain, let's get this out of the way." Spencer then took a junior mint and shoved a birthday candle in it. Ashley laughed and blew out the single candle Spencer had just lit.

"I remember you said that you had never really been on a normal, real date-date. So, I am taking you to the movies and I will be walking you home and giving you a first date kiss and everything."

Ashley smiled softly at the blonde, "Still doesn't explain your mafia connections at the movie theater, and why no one else is in this room."

Spencer looked at Ashley a little nervously, "Well, I may have rented the theater out for us and this special showing."

Ashley's eyes widened in shock, "Spence you didn't have to-"

"I know. I wanted to, so shut up and enjoy it, okay?"

Ashley was overwhelmed with love for the girl sitting in front of her. She pulled the blonde into a sweet, lingering kiss trying to convey how grateful she was. Spencer began laughing into the kiss when she heard Ashley drop the popcorn onto the floor to tangle her hands into blonde hair.

Ashley pulled back slightly and saw the amusement in Spencer's eyes. "I may have rented the theater, but I am pretty sure we aren't allowed to have sex in here."

Ashley scoffed, "Like I would put out on the first date!"

Spencer got that gleam in her eye and simply replied, "My mistake, I forgot the older generations are full of prudes."

Ashley couldn't help but smile, "You do realize I am only 9 months older than you right?"

"Excuses, excuses Davies. Don't get jealous because I am young and beautiful."

"Young? Sure. Beautiful, not so much." Ashley teased, giving the blonde's hand a playful squeeze. "So what are we watching?"

"_Big Fish_ and _Casablanca_. You said _Big Fish_ reminds you of me, so I decided to be vain and play that. And well _Casablanca _speaks for itself."

"Sounds perfect."

And with that the girls snuggled up to one another while the lights dimmed down, and the first movie began.

* * *

The couple was slowly strolling home, following the neon green arrows that would lead them there. Both were quiet, enjoying the other's company without the need for words.

The date had been perfect, after the first movie, Spencer had set up a late lunch of pizza (with candles on top), and the blonde even let Ashley have the last slice. Ashley almost fell off of her chair; Spencer loved her food, and the brunette knew it was rare for her to give it up with a smile (despite the fact that Spencer had already eaten five pieces to Ashley's two).

Ashley silently gripped the hand in hers a little more firmly. Spencer was absolutely perfect. Sure, she was kind of crazy and often got lost in her little world, and yes Spencer loved arguing with Ashley, just to get her all riled up, but Spencer has done and given the spy so much, the brunette was sure she could never repay her.

It was little things like Spencer leaving her the comic section of the newspaper, or not uttering a word while silently nursing a cup of coffee because Ashley caught a random case of insomnia. It was the blonde secretly, and purposely, breaking things around the apartment and asking the brunette to fix it so Ashley would have something to do. It was Spencer's silent understanding of the spy's need to sleep and sit closest to the door. It was them laying on the couch, Ashley's head settled into Spencer's lap, while Spencer read Ashley the stories she had written and swore never to reveal.

But it was also the big things: The way Spencer would, without hesitation, rush head first into danger if it meant protecting Ashley. Or the new life and family the blonde had so subtly given to Ashley. The love Ashley felt from Spencer day in and day out is something so foreign, but so insanely addictive. Spencer understood her, and loved her despite the many emotional and social handicaps that Ashley had. The goofy blonde doctor taught her a lighter side to life Ashley had been lacking for years. She was the strongest person in Ashley's life, while simultaneously being the softest. And Ashley knew Spencer felt the same way about her.

So this display, while so kind and thoughtful of Spencer, was completely unnecessary. Ashley had gotten more from Spencer in these past two months than most people get in a lifetime. A fact Ashley was sure she would never forget.

Spencer slowed the pace of their walk when they reach the front door of their apartment. Hands still linked, the blonde gave Ashley a giant smile.

"Well I hope you enjoyed the date." Spencer gives Ashley a devilish smile before continuing, "I thought someone of your age would have totally fallen asleep during the second movie."

Ashley laughed at the comment, "The old jokes aren't going to stop being amusing to you huh?"

Spencer shook her head smile still lighting up her face. The blonde took a step a little closer towards her girl whispering out, "Too forward if I kiss you on the first date?"

It was Ashley's turn to shake her head, and before she could fully process it, Spencer's lips had met her own in a soft, sweet kiss. Spencer pulled back slightly, a smile lingering on her lips. The blonde let out a small, "umph" when her back collided against their front door, and Ashley's body pressed into her own, their lips fusing together.

The kiss was heated and loving, Ashley's hands were roaming the blonde's body, when the door swung open, and both girls stumbled. Luckily, Ashley was able to keep their balance despite losing the support of the door. Chelsea stood in the doorway, hands on her hips, with a little smile on her face.

"Okay kids, do I need to hose you off? Ashley! I thought with your old age and infinite wisdom you wouldn't act like such a harlot!"

Spencer laughed and Ashley slightly blushed, replying, "Spencer started it."

Again Spencer laughed, "Hey! My kiss was a sweet and innocent first date kiss, you were the one that stepped it up to NC-17!"

Ashley looked shocked at the accusation, but before she could rebuttal Chelsea cut her off, "As cute as the Ashley loves Spencer show is, Ashley and I have things to do, and Spencer so do you, so get out of here."

Spencer gave her best friend a big smile, and the confused brunette a quick peck on the cheek before hightailing it out of there.

Ashley turned towards Chelsea, questions marring her face, but the young artist simply rubbed her hands together, gave the brunette a smile and said, "You are all mine now Spencer's Ashley!"

Ashley's face paled.

* * *

Ashley released a shaky breath. It broke every instinct in her body to go along with Spencer's plan right now. After Spencer left, Chelsea got to play dress up with the brunette. Ashley found herself dressed in a beautiful champagne colored dress (one that was obviously purchased by Spencer for this occasion), blindfolded and ushered into a limo that waited outside the apartment. Ashley was now being ushered by said limo driver to an unknown location, blindfold still in place.

She walked through a door of some sort, and then heard the driver excuse himself. Ashley reached her hand forward, instantly finding Spencer.

"It will never not be creepy that I can't sneak up on you." Spencer said; Ashley could hear the soft smile in her voice. The blonde reached up and pulled the knot keeping Ashley's blindfold in place, careful not to move the tiara.

The brunette's eyes landed on the girl standing in front of her. She wanted to look around, take in the scene, but she was unable to tear her eyes away from the stunning woman in front of her. Spencer stood in a beautiful, soft, blue dress making her eyes that much more brilliant, her hair was up, allowing Ashley's gaze to explore the exposed neck and shoulders. The blonde's makeup was flawless, and Ashley struggled to find the right words to describe how wonderful Spencer looked.

"You are too beautiful to express in words." Ashley finally exhaled, having trouble finding her voice.

"I know that exact feeling Davies." Spencer replied, a soft smile gracing her face, as her hand came up to tenderly stroke Ashley's cheek. Spencer stepped next to the brunette, finally allowing the girl to take in the scene before her.

They were in the gym of the local high school, which was covered in decorations for their fall dance. Streamers and balloons were everywhere, a dance floor in the center of the many different tables. Spencer had lit candles, covering the entire gym in a gentle glow. A small boom box sat on one of the tables, along with a chilling bottle of champagne and what Ashley assumed was their dinner. Ashley could smell the soft aroma of the roses and lilies that were placed all over the gym.

"The high school is having a dance in a few days, and Glen was able to get me a copy of the key to set this up. I know you have never had the whole 'going to a school dance' experience, so I wanted to give you this." Spencer said, her voice a little timid.

Ashley reached her hand down, lacing their fingers together, "It's perfect."

Spencer led them to the table, smiling as she reached for a small box that held Ashley's corsage. The brunette smiled as Spencer slipped the lily and rose arrangement onto her wrist.

The girls danced, laughed, took pictures, chugged the champagne, and finally enjoyed the meal Spencer had prepared. It was a perfect evening. Ashley sat at the table while Spencer went to grab something. The blonde returned with a tray of 29 cupcakes, each holding a single, lit candle.

"Make a wish Ash." Spencer whispered, her eyes glowing in the soft lighting. Ashley blew out the candles, a smile adorning her face.

Spencer pulled up a chair next to the brunette, and reached under the table and pulled out a medium sized, flat gift.

"I'm nervous to give you your gift." The blonde said, with a small half smile.

"Spencer, this was all too much, I don't need a gift on top of it."

Spencer just smiled, and placed the gift in Ashley's hand. The brunette began tearing into the present, freezing when she caught glimpse of it. In Ashley's lap sat an 8x10-framed photo of herself and her parents. Ashley couldn't have been older than 3 years old in the picture; her father was holding her up in the air while her mother stood by their side, all three sharing the biggest smile on their face. A tear hit the glass before she knew she was even crying.

"I, um, looked into your family a little bit. Your mom was really good friends with a photography professor at the university they taught at. She moved away when you were about four years old. I found her; she lives in Chicago now. I told her who I was, and told her that my beautiful, sweet girlfriend was the daughter of Christine Davies. She began to cry. She said she was at the funeral, and had lost track of your father after that.

"I explained that your father had passed away when you were in your teens, and I didn't really go much further into that, but I asked if she might have any photos of you and your parents. She sent an entire box over for you to look at. She also said she would love to meet us, talk to you about your mother."

Ashley was finally able to rip her gaze away from the photo to look at Spencer. Her blue eyes were filled with warmth and love. Ashley opened her mouth to speak, but nothing came out. Spencer gave her a soft smile; her hand reached out and grabbed Ashley's. The blonde soothingly stroked the brunette's wrist with her thumb.

"Ash, you are literally the person I have been dreaming about my whole life. I may never have envisioned double lives, or corrupt CIA happenings, but they are all just part of what makes you so perfect and amazing. I have never been happier than I am with you, in this very moment, and every other moment that we are in each other's presence. I truly believe that everything I am and everything I have done has led me to you, and no matter what lifetime, galaxy, or situation, I would love you.

"So I wanted to do something special for you. Because you know how cold my feet get at night and you cover them with your own, and because you deal with the craziness that is me and my family, and because you only smile when I ramble on and on about the greatness of a good/bad 90's movie. You love me for everything I am, and everything I am not. And while I could never repay you for that, I can love you exactly the same way, and I can try and make every one of your wishes come true.

I wanted to give you your family, or least a part of them and I didn-"

Ashley finally cut Spencer off with a kiss. The brunette's head was swimming. The blonde had given her everything, and so much more and her overwhelming feelings of love and joy just needed to find Spencer.

The kiss was deep and passionate, and the girls lost themselves in it. Some how, they managed to make it onto the floor, Ashley lying gently on top of Spencer; and some how, they managed to get each other out of their dresses, soft kisses and delicate hands trailing the newly exposed flesh; and Ashley, some how, figured out how to show Spencer how grateful she was and how much she loved her.

* * *

The two were getting dressed, smiles plastered on their faces as they did. Spencer had brought them both changes, jeans and simple blouses. Ashley was mildly concerned why she would need another outfit change, but remained silent.

Spencer stood upright, while stretching her back a little, "Well, if I knew that was going to happen, I definitely would have set up a bed somewhere. Look at you Ash, getting into the cliché sex after prom thing!"

The brunette scoffed a little, her eyes roaming Spencer's underwear clad body. Ashley walked towards the blonde, almost fully dressed expect for a top. Her arms wrapped around Spencer's small waist, as she places soft, sweet kisses on the girl's neck.

"You sure we just can't go home to our bed? I'll be as cliché as you like."

Spencer smiled, "That doesn't even make sense Ash, plus, you have one more surprise!" The blonde gave the girl another peck and hurried to finish getting dressed.

After cleaning the gym up a little, and blowing out all the candles, the two exited the building to find the last set of neon green arrows leading them to their next destination. Spencer assured the brunette someone would be there soon to pick up all their items and make sure the gym would be ready for the high school kids.

Spencer excitedly pulled the brunette along, while Ashley purposely walked as slow as possible just to annoy Spencer.

"Aaaasssshhhhh come on! We have a schedule to adhere to!" Spencer whined, before getting a devilish smile, which she followed with a firm slap to Ashley's ass.

Ashley looked at Spencer in shock (a small smile on her face), while Spencer stood looking innocent. Before Ashley could say anything, the blonde started running away, laughing and calling Ashley old.

Ashley began to chase the blonde, laughing as well, as the two followed the arrows. Ashley was easily catching up to the blonde, and Spencer sighed in relief when she saw their destination. She ran through the doors of one of two local bars the small town had, just as Ashley had caught her around the waist, laughing into the blonde's hair.

Ashley jumped back (with Spencer in her arms) when the loud "Surprise!" erupted through the room. The bar was crowded with so many people; Ashley immediately spotted Clay, Glen, and Chelsea. She saw Glen's girlfriend Staci, smile on her face, along with numerous townspeople that brunette had interacted with during her time here. Smiling faces, all under a banner that read "Happy Birthday Ashley!" She was shocked, and overwhelmed, but so, so happy.

Spencer reached down and laced her fingers through Ashley's and led her forward. On the bar sat 29 shots of something topped with whipped cream, each holding a candle. Ashley looked around again, knowing she had found a home, a place where she fit, then looked to Spencer before blowing out her birthday shots.

* * *

Ashley was drunk. Spencer was even more drunk. She had no idea why, but both were laughing so hard they had to stop walking. The party had been a success. Karaoke was sung, presents were shared, alcohol was consumed, and over all debauchery occurred.

At one point Ashley may have sat Clay down and given him a long lecture about how wonderful Chelsea is, and how he needs to pull his head out of his ass and ask her out. The phrase "wind beneath my wings" may even have been used. A shell shocked Clay seemed in a daze after hearing this information, so rather than wait for him, Ashley may have beaten Chelsea in a shot for shot competition, which resulted in Chelsea having to sit in Clay's lap and make out with his face.

Ashley wanted to help Chelsea out; she loved the girl. Loved her like you love your crazy little sister that constantly caught you making out with your boyfriend after curfew. Ashley loved Chelsea like you love a crazy, psychotic dog that goes from wanting to bite off your hand to twenty seconds later cuddling up to you and giving you a soft lick on the cheek. _Yea that is exactly how I love Chelsea, half terrified, half, um, not terrified._

The moment the Clay and Chelsea began to kiss, literally everyone in the bar cheered, few shouts of finally's, and Spencer giving Ashley the most loving stare in the planet. Shortly after, Clay and Chelsea were reported missing from the party. But the celebration went on, as did the drinking, and singing, and oddly enough arm wrestling.

Now the girls were making their way home, albeit, slowly. Spencer kept trying to see how long she could hold her breathe for, but laughed at 7 seconds every time. Ashley decided that walking backwards, on her hands, would be the most entertaining way to walk home, but every time Spencer would laugh, she would start laughing, and fall over. At least this was more discrete than when Ashley ran up a wall and black flipped off it (she was trying to impress Spencer).

Both girls had collapsed in the grass they were walking through from their giggle fit. Spencer was on top of the brunette, enjoying the position.

"That was totally the best party."

Ashley smiled, "Totally."

"I wish Henry was here. He was totally the best party horse."

"Mmmmhmmmm." Ashley responded but was slight distracted by the soft fingers tracing over her face, and the warm body pressed so nicely into hers.

"Ashley, I have a secret." Ashley popped up an eyebrow silently asking the girl to continue. "I totally want to have sex with you when we get home, but my body refuses to move."

Before Spencer could process what was happening, she had been swept up in Ashley's arms, her legs wrapped around the spy's waist, and Ashley started jogging towards their home.

Spencer started laughing, loving Ashley's eagerness, and rewarded her with a slow kiss. They were less than a block away from the apartment, and she knew Ashley didn't need to pay attention for the duration of the walk.

The kisses were heated, Ashley's hands slowly moving down to cup Spencer's ass. Spencer's tongue was softly tracing Ashley's rapidly parting lips, her hands weaving through the brunette's curls. The kiss only broke once when Ashley tripped over a curb, but once their balance was established, the kissing continued. They were a few steps from their front door, when Ashley heard a rustling.

Spencer had no idea how, but she was instantly standing behind Ashley, Ashley protectively blocking her from harm, one arm reaching back and blocking her way. Spencer's head was reeling, she was literally kissing her girl all of 2 seconds ago, but she held back a gasp when she saw someone standing in the dark in front of their door.

Spencer could see Ashley's tense shoulders and muscles, so the blonde silently grabbed the girl's hand. The figure slowly stepped out of the dark.

Spencer relaxed when she realized it was Madison, but Ashley remained tense.

Madison looked at the two slightly disheveled girls, before saying, "Aiden is dead. The CIA knows you are alive."


	27. The Fall

**Thank you for all the love! Here is the penultimate chapter (finally hit 200 pages with this one!). I am working on the epilogue too. Happy reading!**

Chapter 27: The Fall

It was the equivalent to a gallon of coffee, a cold shower, someone talking about politics, and your parents walking in on you as you round second base with your significant other all in one. Madison's simple sentence was the best buzz kill Spencer had ever encountered.

The three somberly made their way inside the apartment, which had never felt safer as it did in those moments. Ashley had a death grip on Spencer's hand, but Spencer decided she would cut it off and hand it to the brunette if it would help her in this terrible situation.

Madison sat at the table, her head resting in her hands, while the two girls immediately went to the kitchen to put on a pot of coffee. Coffee wouldn't fix the situation, but it would definitely give them something to stare at when the awkward silence became too much.

Spencer wasn't sure if it was shock, the alcohol still in her system, or an aneurism, but she literally had no words for the situation. Everything was going to come crashing down, and Spencer could only hope Ashley and herself would be clinging together when the debris fell.

Spencer exited the kitchen after starting the coffee, but stopped in the hallway when she felt a soft hand hold onto her wrist. She turned around to face Ashley feeling tears already clouding her blue eyes. Ashley looked so defeated, exactly opposite of what she looked like a mere half an hour ago. The weight of the world had fallen back on the brunette's shoulders, seemingly heavier than before, and the blonde just wished she could somehow take some of the pressure.

Ashley pulled the girl closer to her, her forehead resting on Spencer's. Spencer lifted her hands, delicately cupping the brunette's face as she fought the tears back. Ashley closed her eyes, sighing in defeat already, and whispered, "Spencer, I'm so scared."

And Spencer's heart officially broke in that moment. The small, honest truth that tumbled out of her spy's mouth made her want to faint. Spencer felt a tear break free. She closed the small distance between them, placing the softest kiss she could manage on the broken brunette's lips.

"I've told you once already: I'll protect you." The blonde saw Ashley's lips twitch into a small smile at her words. Spencer gave the girl another kiss and whispered, "We will figure it out Ash. I'll be here with you every step of the way."

* * *

They were all sitting at the table, three laptops, everything Ashley and Spencer had on the CIA, and a GIANT pot of coffee. Ashley and Spencer had changed into more comfortable clothing, managed to sober up almost entirely, and sat down with Madison to find out what the hell was going on.

Madison received an encrypted email to an account only a select few knew about. After cracking the encryption, she realized it was from Aiden. It was simple, reading: "In all likelihood I'm dead. Tell Ashley I failed her, and I am sorry, for everything. Make sure the bastards pay."

Five minutes after reading the email, Madison was already on her way to the girls, and calling to cash in on her vacation time from work. An hour, a lot of broken highway laws, and an additional fifteen minutes waiting by the door, Madison got to deliver Aiden's message.

So the girls quickly began searching for anything that would tell them about what happened to Aiden. He had told everyone he was being sent on a solo mission in Florida. Blake was already on a mission of his own in Oregon, and Snider left for a mission on the same day as Aiden. The CIA was unaware, at this point, that Aiden had died.

Both spies figured Aiden had created a program that activated upon his death, which emailed Madison. It was common thing for spies to do. Typically, it worked on a checking in, or a remote deactivation, that the spy had control over. If the spy didn't check in at the appropriate time, the program began taking care of whatever wishes were intended in case of death. Aiden had probably confided in Madison because out of anyone in the agency, she would most likely be able to find and contact Ashley.

After hacking into Aiden's email and home computer (Spencer didn't even want to know how the two had managed that so easily), it was clear Aiden was conducting an investigation of his own on the four men, beginning almost immediately after the attempt on Ashley's life.

While it offered little to no new information for the girls, it was nice to know Aiden wasn't a complete douche. Through all this, Spencer's nervous energy resulted in a mass amount of food being brought from the kitchen to the dinner table for everyone to eat. She lacked the hacker knowledge, but she was able to offer opinions and insight the spies might overlook. During her bouts of channeling Rachel Ray, Spencer had managed to only injury herself once, and drop a large bowl of cookie dough onto the floor. She deemed this a success. Madison had chalked the girl's clumsiness up to the alcohol consumed. Ashley and Spencer both assured her it had nothing to do with alcohol.

Ashley and Madison were eventually able to track both Snider and Blake to Texas via random surveillance and face matching programs. Aiden had also been linked in the same town, almost 20 hours prior, by tracing credit card activity on one of his aliases. They had been all together, and Aiden had most likely been caught for his investigation and tortured for information by Snider and Blake.

"He was never the best at covering his tracks." Ashley admitted, a pang of sadness and guilt washing over her. The sun was slowly beginning to appear, and the three girls were the strangest mixture of wired and exhausted.

Spencer was about to get up again, her nervous energy urging her to cook something for everyone, but Ashley's hand on her thigh kept her still.

Ashley looked at both girls, "We need a plan. Thanks to Aiden, and Madison's quick thinking we are ahead of these assholes. The CIA isn't even aware of Dennison's death, and we are. Snider won't send just anyone to come and find me, not after what happened with Aiden. One or both of them are going to probably start in Los Angeles, and once they find nothing there, they will come here. There is no telling how much Aiden said or didn't say, so we have to assume they know everything Aiden did. The only thing that concerns me is Aiden saw Spencer and I talking. The most important thing is to protect Spencer and her family."

Spencer's eyes widened a little at this comment, and Madison could do nothing, but go along with this plan. The blonde spoke up before Ashley could continue, "We can send everyone away. It is almost Thanksgiving; we can send them away as a surprise for the holiday, we can stay here claiming I have a few things to finish at work before we can join them. It'll be easy to convince them, and I doubt anyone will care that much about my family, but I'd rather be safe than sorry."

Ashley nodded her head in agreement, and then turned towards Spencer, "Spence, you should go-"

Spencer cut her off before she could finish her sentence, "We both know that one or both of us ends up doing something stupid if we are separated. I'm staying here and helping."

Ashley only nodded her head again; it was true. If their trip to Los Angeles proved anything it was that they were stronger together rather than apart. Ashley turned towards Madison, "Can you book a flight for five to Hawaii, and book a hotel, get three bedrooms. I'll call their respective works and figure out something so they miraculously get time off. Spencer you send your father a text asking him to contact you as soon as he wakes up, since he is slightly in the loop we can push the urgency of them leaving on him. We need to get them out of here as soon as possible."

Ashley handed Madison a credit card, while Spencer went to get her phone. She looked at the two women making arrangements, and let out a little sigh; Ashley knew what she wanted to do, but she didn't want to do it without the other two girls agreeing with her.

"I've been talking to my contact in DC. She still doesn't know it is me giving her these little pieces of information. We still don't know what these assholes are doing exactly, and we don't have enough to nail them yet, but there is enough that she is very interested in what is being sent to her. I want to take these sons of bitches down, but I don't want to do it without you two behind it 100%. We could just disappear if you two wanted; it wouldn't be that hard, it is up to you guys."

Madison and Spencer share a look, before Spencer gives the Latina a curt nod. It was slight disturbing, but Ashley would have to worry about their newly found telepathic ability later. Spencer replied for the both of them, "Let's nail these fuckers."

Madison had a big grin, and Ashley was shocked (and a little turned on) to hear Spencer talk in such a manner.

"Okay, let's find something that will end these guys."

* * *

It was still early in the morning, too early for normal and sane people to be awake, especially normal and sane people that consumed the same amount of alcohol that Spencer and Ashley had the previous night, but they continued to search. They were looking for something, anything that gave reason behind the mysterious deaths Snider had caused.

While Spencer would never be able to hack into computers, shoot someone between the eyes, or even do a back flip without a cheerleader spotting her, she was smart. There was a random line in Aiden's research that had been annoying her since seeing it a few hours prior. It simply read: canceled appointments. What appointments, Spencer had no idea, and it was written on the side of a scanned document. For all she knew it was a reminder to cancel his eyebrow waxing appointment (Aiden seemed like the eyebrow waxing kind of guy).

Spencer logged back into the CIA system Ashley had managed to get them access to. It occurred to her that none of them had checked the canceled appointments of the Los Angeles branch of the CIA. So, Spencer began looking. The appointments ranged from meeting with different government representatives to interviews for hire.

The blonde glanced back up at the equally frustrated brunettes that were hunched over their own computers, her eyes swept over the papers scattered everywhere and finally focused on the original poster board Ashley and Spencer had made the day of the family BBQ. _The new agents, Ashley was suspicious about them_. The blonde narrowed the canceled appointments search to interviews for hire.

After scrolling through the different names and faces for a little, Spencer let out a little squeal of happiness while banging her hand on the table.

"I got it! I got these assholes!" The startled brunettes looked at Spencer like she was crazy.

"Ashley! Look, look at this file! Aiden had somewhat figured it out! Do you see that guy? He worked at the club when we got attacked! He was a bad guy, and he was scheduled for an interview, but had to 'cancel' because you killed him!"

Madison was still a little bewildered and was somewhat positive that Spencer had finally cracked, but Ashley seemed to understand what Spencer was implying, and sank back into her chair in understanding and astonishment.

Spencer began pacing back and forth as she continued her thought process, arms flailing dangerously. "Snider is stacking the CIA full of bad guys! Mob men! That's why all the new hires were so squeaky clean! They are all aliases! So, the mob officially has its hands in the CIA and Snider and company were the masterminds behind it! They were killing off the suspicious and high up agents so they could do this without having to worry about anyone else!"

Spencer was elated! The mystery was cracked! Madison looked shell shocked, and Ashley was furiously typing away on her computer. She lifted her head and said, "I used the facial recognition software, and changed it to a 90% match rather than a 100%, all the new hires are being linked to mob members and prior arrests! They altered the original photos like I did. It is why no one has linked them together. This is perfect, we have to get this information to my contact, now."

Spencer was still jumping around the living room, declaring herself master spy of Davies and Carlin manner! Madison was busy chasing after Spencer to catch the random things she threw around in celebration, and Ashley felt a huge wave of relief wash over her. They were so close to putting all of this behind them, she could taste it.

* * *

It wasn't terribly difficult to convince her family to take an all expenses paid trip to Hawaii. Especially when the school had called Glen offering him extra holiday time for Thanksgiving, and when there was unexpected fumigation that started today at Arthur's work, and when, for whatever reason, Clay got a call from his boss threatening him to take a vacation or it will result in immediate termination (Spencer and Ashley both agreed Chelsea would need little to no push to skip town).

Arthur looked at his daughter, and instantly knew there was a reason for this sudden trip. Needless to say he was a large supporter of them going away. After it was agreed upon, he shot Spencer a quick look of concern, but the blonde simply brushed it off and promised Ashley and herself would meet them in a couple days, well before the holiday. Everyone was packed and leaving within two hours of the offer.

Madison and Ashley hung back at the apartment, printing documents and preparing for their next step. Ashley had informed her contact that a meet was necessary. There was no way Ashley was going to leave this to chance to get lost or discovered by the wrong person, so she would deliver it personally.

Reluctantly, her D.C. contact agreed to meet in Kansas, essentially a halfway point between Washington and Los Angeles. Both will fly in, have an hour lay-over, and return home, making the exchange in the airport itself. Ashley assured her contact that she would know who she was the moment she saw her. Ashley would fly out of a private airport in Los Angeles in approximately eight hours.

The only way this would work was if Ashley promised to go alone. Both Spencer and Madison reluctantly agreed. Spencer would stay with Madison in Los Angeles, in hopes of avoiding the inevitable search that would occur in the small town. Snider was smart; he wouldn't attract attention to himself or to Ashley. A simple sweep of her old hotel, and he would be sure to return to Los Angeles for more technologically advanced ways of finding the girl. It bought them some time.

Ashley couldn't be sure what Aiden may have revealed, but she was almost positive that Spencer would be left out of it. Once Ashley's D.C. contact obtained the information and reported the evidence to a higher up, it would only be a matter of how fast they could find Snider, Blake and the rest of their goons, and put them in jail.

Madison was currently finishing up a shower, while Ashley finalized the contents she would be traveling with. Ashley looked up when the young Latina entered the room. Madison's eyes instantly locked onto the large framed photo of herself and her parents.

"I'm sorry this all happened on your birthday Davies."

Ashley gave the girl a half smile, "I assume you are the one that snitched to Spencer? You can't imagine the thrill she gets from the old jokes she has been making."

Madison was slowly walking through the living room, taking in the shared living space of Ashley and Spencer. Madison had seen Ashley's apartment in Los Angeles- it was cold, uninviting, nothing like the home the two so easily built here. Her eyes lingered on a photo of the girls taken the day of the family BBQ, both covered in chocolate ice cream and giant grins.

"You deserve her Ashley. You deserve this life. I will do my best to keep her safe while you give the documents to Woods."

Ashley stilled her movements, locking her eyes with Madison's, "I know you will. You are the next best thing after myself."

* * *

Madison had offered to drive them back to Los Angeles, having gotten a nap in while the girls packed things they need. Ashley and Spencer were seated in the back, Spencer's arms wrapped around the brunette's bicep, while Ashley's thumb softly stroked Spencer's thigh. Spencer's head was leaning on Ashley's shoulders as both of them watched the world pass by through the window.

There was no need for words. Everyone knew what needed to be done. Spencer's family was safely bundled onto a plane heading for Hawaii, and in a few short hours everyone would know what Snider had been up to. All the unlawful deaths, broken laws, and corruption would be corrected.

When Madison drove up to the private plane, everyone still remained silent. Exiting the car, Ashley kept a firm grip on Spencer's hand. Madison ached for the two girls; Madison gave Ashley a brief nod and mumbled, "Let's finish this Davies" before she turned and headed back towards the car, allowing the girls a private moment.

Spencer was trying her hardest not to look terrified. It was a good plan, a safe plan. Everything would be okay and Ashley would be back in her arms in hours. It was the mantra she repeated in her head over and over again. This will protect so many people; they had to do this.

The brunette gave the young doctor a soft smile, her thumb caressing her cheek. Ashley leaned in for a gentle kiss, and Spencer melted into her. The brunette reluctantly pulled back whispering a quiet "I love you", and turned around to board her plane. The image of Spencer's tear streaked face haunted her with each step she took.

* * *

Ashley waited in front of terminal 4 patiently, her eyes scanning for Kyla Woods. They had worked together numerous times, and through the years Kyla got herself promoted to head of the D.C. CIA branch. Ashley and Kyla had a secret understanding and unrestrained respect for one another, and Ashley always volunteered for a case if it meant she got to work with the small brunette. Woods and Durate were her people in the vast CIA world, and if there was anyone that she would trust with this, it would be Kyla.

Ashley spotted Kyla before Kyla had seen her. Ashley took a step towards the girl, finally catching her attention. The people walking by would never know the shock and surprise Kyla felt surge through her upon seeing Ashley Davies alive, and standing with a small messenger bag slung over her shoulder. Ashley herself barely caught the widened eyes, and the slightly parted mouth.

"I should have known no mission could take you down."

"Well, the only reason I knew anything about Snider was because of the first hand experience."

"I'm embarrassed about how happy I am that you are the informant."

"Sorry I didn't tell you sooner, I just needed you to believe me before I made a reappearance in your life."

"I would have trusted anything you said Davies."

Ashley smiled at Kyla. She took the bag off her shoulder and offered it to the shorter brunette. When the bag was out of her possession, Ashley felt the biggest relief wash over her.

"Everything you need is in there to put him away forever. I urge you to not delay, there is a large chance my fake death is no longer a secret. The price for my head is probably higher than in Dubai four years ago."

Kyla gave the girl a half smile remembering the craziness that was that mission. "Of course, I've never been one to slack off." Kyla didn't want to say goodbye just yet, but their planes were going to be boarding soon, and the faster Kyla got back, the faster this mess would be behind them.

Ashley understood Kyla's hesitancy, but she had someone waiting for her at home. "I know Woods, that's why I trusted you with this. I'll contact you soon; once my name is clear, maybe we can catch up."

Ashley turned after Kyla nodded her head in agreement. She had a plane to catch. Ashley had only taken a few steps before she heard Kyla yell, "Hey!"

Ashley turned back around facing the brunette, her eyebrow lifted in response.

Kyla's head was tilted to the side, a small smile playing on her lips when she finally yelled, "Death looks good on you!"

Ashley had to laugh at the remark nodding her head in agreement. _You have no idea_.

* * *

Spencer had been talking for hours. Based on the words coming out of Spencer's mouth, most would never know the stress she was under, but Madison could see it. She saw it in the blonde's slightly hunched shoulders, the twinge of sadness and panic in her blue eyes, and the nervous finger tapping. So, Madison asked her question after question about dumb things: Ashley's party, her jobs, movies from the 90's, anything to try and keep her from freaking out about the brunette.

The blonde had settled down a little when they received a text stating the papers had been delivered and she was on her way back to Los Angeles. The pair was sitting in the living room of a safe house of Madison's and Spencer had finally allowed her voice some rest. The blonde looked exhausted, but slightly more relieved than before.

Spencer sent Madison a smile, "Thank you, you know, for not strangling me for rambling."

Madison matched her smile, "Davies warned me about your run away mouth."

The blonde was about the reply, but was interrupted with a loud banging coming from the door, and four huge men coming through, all holding guns pointed at the two.

Madison was standing and aiming her single weapon at the group, after yanking Spencer behind her.

One of the men spoke up, "Durate, not so good at picking hiding spots. I think you better leave the blonde bimbo and come with us. Snider is dying to have a little chat with you."

Spencer looked on with wide eyes, but Madison remained calm, "Boys, there are better ways to ask me to cut my vacation short. My lovely boss should know that."

Spencer began glancing around the room. Behind her was Madison's coffee table, a small drawer was towards the bottom of it. The blonde had spent enough time with Ashley to know that spies loved to hide weapons everywhere. Spencer slowly began to slide the drawer open with her foot while everyone continued to point guns at one another.

"Enough of this bullshit Durate. Snider knows Davies is alive, and he figures if he dangles you, her precious little spy buddy, she will come running, but I suppose the plan works just as well if we kill you and pretend you are alive."

Spencer had managed to open the drawer and a single hand grenade rested in there. The blonde was trying to assess what her options were. These men wanted Madison as a lure for Ashley, Madison and herself were going to be murdered no matter the circumstances, and Ashley would go after Snider if she believed she could save someone, probably resulting in Ashley's death as well. Ashley's death was not an option, and if Spencer had any say, neither was Madison's.

Spencer reached down and grabbed the bomb, but before anyone could shoot her for the sudden movement, she displayed what she was holding, her hand on the pin.

"I wouldn't do anything stupid if I were you boys. We can all end up extra toasty if you do." Madison had turned and was staring at the blonde with wide eyes. Spencer gave her a little look, one that tried to convey calm, and understanding. Spencer knew Ashley asked Madison to protect her with her life, but Spencer would be damned if she let everyone die in vain.

"You don't need Madison to get to Ashley. You have me." Madison made a noise of protest, but Spencer gave her a deadly look. The men gave Spencer a disbelieving look, guns still aimed at both Madison and Spencer.

"Ashley loves me, we have been living together for months now. Go ahead and check my phone on the table." One of the men grabbed her phone, seeing a photo of the two of them together on the home screen.

Spencer continued, "So here is what is going to happen. You are going to let Madison live, she can tell Ashley that Snider has me, and you can take me instead. She will come after me; I know she will. And you can't kill me because she is smart, she won't come looking for revenge, she will just disappear and no one will ever see her again if she has the slightest hint that I am dead. Or you can not listen to me, and I can just blow up everyone in this room and that will be that."

The men all looked at one another, obviously deciding to go with the blonde's plan.

"Durate gets tied up, I don't want any funny business here." One of the men grumbled out.

Spencer only nodded her head in compliance, "Be nice to her, or everyone goes boom."

One of the men tied Madison up to a chair, the brunette struggling and pleading with Spencer to cut the shit.

When the burly man stepped away from Madison, Spencer stepped towards the brunette, leaning to speak into her ear.

"I'm sorry you had to break your promise to Ashley, but I am not going to let all of us die. Tell her they killed me. Tell her to let it go and to just hide." Spencer paused for a moment, giving Madison a soft smile, " 'Don't come back, don't fight, consider me dead. The last thing I ask of you is to walk away and not turn back.' "

These words were ringing in her ears, when she saw one of the men bring the butt of the gun to her head and her world went black.

* * *

Ashley knew something was wrong the moment she stepped off of the plane. Spencer wasn't waiting there with an inappropriate sign, a large stuffed animal, and a sulky Madison. Spencer never said she would meet her at the plane, but it was rare when the blonde passed up an opportunity to embarrass the brunette. But Ashley pushed the thoughts aside reasoning that both girls were probably very tired and just hanging out at Madison's place.

So Ashley got a cab and headed to the location. As she made her way up the steps of the apartment building, her stomach filled with dread.

Just as she was rounding the corner to reach the front door she heard her phone make a noise. Pulling it out, she sighed in relief when she saw it was a text from Spencer. She pushed open the front door distractedly as she unlocked the phone.

Her eyes glanced up, saw the disarray and unconscious Madison gagged and tied to the chair. Ashley ran over, checking to ensure the girl had a pulse, sighing in relief when she felt it.

Ashley had a death grip on her phone. She slowly brought it to eye level, her breath caught in her throat. With a shaking hand, she opened the text to see a picture of Spencer's still body in a pool of blood, and an address.


	28. The Crash

**Sorry this took so long, I kept changing and adding and reworking everything. I guess I can't believe this story is ending! I'm working on the epilogue now, but this is it folks! Thank you for sticking with me for this long and I hope you enjoy this! Italics are flashbacks.**

**Chapter 28: The Crash**

Ashley didn't remember dropping her phone to the ground. Nor did she remember cutting loose an unconscious Madison. She did not recall gathering any and all weapons she saw around her and stealing Madison's car keys. She couldn't remember the route she took to get to the abandoned building on the outskirts of Los Angeles.

What she did remember was Spencer's musical laughter. What those blue eyes looked like when they first fluttered open in the morning. The quiet sigh Spencer would release when they were both in bed at night as Spencer's head found its way to Ashley's shoulder.

Her mind was filled with memories.

_Ashley was in the kitchen finishing up dinner when Spencer arrived home from work. The brunette smiled when she felt arms slip around her waist from behind, a soft kiss placed on her neck. Ashley turned around in Spencer's arms, her eyebrow arched up when she saw the devious little smirk on the young doctor's face. _

"_What did you do Carlin?"_

_Spencer's smile only got bigger when she innocently uttered, "nothing." The blonde had moved away from the brunette trying to get some distance so she could keep her secret a little longer, but Ashley was too fast for her. _

_Strong hands found their way to Spencer's hips, lifting the girl to a seated position on the kitchen counter, faces merely inches away, Ashley standing between the girl's legs. The brunette licked her lips, barely whispering, "Tell me."_

_A shiver ran through the blonde; there was no use in trying to fight Ashley. "Remember a few days ago when you said you had never done any drugs and I went on a rant about you missing out on completely stupid milestones of life? Well, I may have convinced Glen to give me some weed he confiscated from one of the kids at the high school."_

_Ashley laughed out loud. Spencer had been shocked to hear Ashley had never even smoked pot. Her job with the CIA ensured that drugs were not something you dabbled in. When the brunette questioned Spencer as to when she smoked weed, Spencer merely snorted and replied, "You don't grow up with Chelsea and Glen and not smoke pot at least once."_

_When Ashley's laughter died down she looked at the smirking blonde, "You want me to smoke a joint?" _

_The blonde merely nodded her head, her face nuzzling into the brunette's neck. "You realize we are adults and not two college kids that just finished midterms?"_

_Again the blonde nodded her head. Ashley still looked a little hesitant. The blonde leaned in for a soft kiss. _

"_I would never pressure you to do anything, but come on, don't be lame." Ashley smiled and rolled her eyes at Spencer. The doctor merely continued, "I've only smoked twice, both times the summer after graduating from high school. It was dumb, and made me lazy and goofy, but it was a life experience. I just want to make sure you don't miss life experiences. So let's light this joint I have, put on some Bob Marley, stuff our faces with way too much food, and then fall asleep watching an Anna Faris movie."_

_Ashley could only laugh and nod her head in agreement._

_They ate too much, giggled at almost everything, and discussed the possibility of zombie apocalypse for over an hour. Spencer fell asleep with a smile on her face, knowing she had the best zombie killer in the world as her girlfriend. _

Ashley barely registered when the car came to a screeching halt outside of a run down building in the middle of nowhere. She barely managed to wrap her head around the fact that she had killed the five men standing guard outside with her bare hands. She didn't hear them yelling at her to freeze, or the sound of them swinging at her, and she definitely didn't hear the loud cracking of their bones; she could only see the memories of her life with Spencer flashing before her eyes.

The brunette had one mission, and that was to kill Snider for taking away to only happiness she had ever known. She didn't care if she died while doing it, Snider and Blake would pay for killing Spencer.

_They were having a quiet breakfast one morning. Spencer and her were trading sections of the paper while nibbling on toast and coffee. The blonde lifted her head from the paper, "I've been thinking Ash." _

_The brunette quietly lowered her section of the paper, her eyes locking onto beautiful blue ones. Spencer patiently waited for a verbal signal from the spy. Ashley rolled her eyes with a smile, and took the bait, "What have you been thinking Spence?"_

"_Um, well, I think I should make a will." Ashley's eyes widen slightly, but she allows the blonde to continue, knowing there will be a rambling explanation behind her need to give away her worldly possessions. _

"_After the trip to LA," both girls slightly wince at the mention of it, "and reading in the paper about poor Mr. Barker getting hit by lightening, it has me thinking about how life is really crazy and can be really short. And while I don't have millions," Spencer gave Ashley a pointed look with a small smile, "there are a few things I would want everyone to have, and I have some money around."_

_Ashley only nodded her head, understanding where the blonde was coming from. "I mean, you have a will Ash, and no, I probably won't donate it all to charities like you, but I can make sure that my dad, the boys, Chelsea, you, and even baby Susie get the important things. I just think-"_

_Ashley interrupted Spencer's, most likely, long explanation. "I changed my will."_

_Spencer gave Ashley a questioning look, and the cute little head tilt that made Ashley's heart melt. "If, um, anything happens to me, you get everything," Spencer's eyes widen at those words, "and if anything should happen and both of us are gone, it all goes to your father, to distribute accordingly. There is also a letter waiting for him, explaining everything, if anything should happen to us. I couldn't imagine he would keep all the money, so I am sure some, if not most, would go to charity. I mean there is a lot of mon-"_

_And this time it was Ashley that was cut off when Spencer's had somehow pulled her into a deep kiss. Spencer pulled back, her eyes brimmed with tears and simply asked, "When?"_

_Ashley smiled at the girl, her fingers brushing some hair out of Spencer's face, "The day we got back from Los Angeles. I warned you Carlin, I'm in it for the long haul." _

_Spencer smiled sweetly at her spy and replied, "So you are."_

Ashley barely registered the clip she emptied from her silenced gun into the three goons that were loitering in the hallway of the building. Shooting them before they could process much more than the fact that a stranger was in the building. She ignored her split lip, and the throbbing of her head.

As she stepped over the dead bodies, she saw two options: large double doors that lead to the warehouse, and a set of stairs, that would also lead her to the warehouse, but also give her the advantage of seeing from above.

She dropped the empty gun from her hand, reaching down to grab a fully loaded one from one of the bodies. She silently went on, with the goal of killing Snider as her fuel.

_The wound Aiden had inflicted on her side was healing well. It was a little startling to be living with someone so normal and happy, but Ashley was glad to be put in the situation. After her drunken confessions about her past to Spencer, there was a new lightness that both girls felt around each other._

_Ashley was constantly trying to adjust to just how silly and happy the blonde always seemed to be. It was a breathe of fresh air that Ashley didn't even realize she needed. _

_Her feelings for the blonde had been escalating, and she feared what would happen when she had to leave, or, even worse, if she succumbed to what she wanted and simply kissed the blonde. It was bizarre for the brunette spy to feel anything towards anyone, but she knew what she was feeling for the young doctor was real. It terrified her to no end. _

_Ashley wandered into the kitchen, hearing the mayhem all the way from the bedroom. She was met with a grinning blonde, singing (loudly) along to the radio, into a brownie batter-ed spoon. The blonde had little concern over the batter that she was spilling all over the kitchen as she twirled around singing "Respect" by Aretha Franklin. _

_The blonde spun one more time and finally noticed the smiling brunette. With a large grin she continued singing into the spoon, slowly walking towards Ashley. The spy couldn't help but laugh at the small amount of chocolate powder smeared across Spencer's cheek. _

_The girl grabbed Ashley's hand and began to twirl the girl around the kitchen, urging her to join the dance party. Soon both were laughing, dancing, and singing together to the smooth voice of Aretha. _

_Spencer was mid-twirl as the song changed on the radio. Both girls were breathing hard, when the much slower Elvis song began playing. Ashley, a little unsure what to do, simply looked at the blonde. Spencer had a soft smile playing on her lips when she wrapped her arms around Ashley's neck. The brunette gulped as she placed her hands on Spencer's small waist. The two slowly swayed to the song, the air thickening almost immediately. _

_Spencer brought her lips to Ashley's ear softly singing to the girl, "Like a river flows surely to the sea, Darling so it goes some things are meant to be. So take my hand, take my whole life too, for I can't help falling in love with you…"_

_Ashley let the words wash over her, as she pulled the small body closer to her own. She closed her eyes, trying to keep the tears at bay: she was head over heels in love with the girl in her arms._

Ashley was standing on a ledge of sorts, looking down in the warehouse filled with crates. She could see Blake with a man by his side facing Snider, two men flanking him. They were talking.

"What if she doesn't show up Snider? You think she was the one that killed Rick? Did we fuck up by killing Geoff?"

Snider gave the man a humorless smile. "No Blake, she actually did me a favor," and before Blake could respond, Snider had pulled his gun out and shot both Blake and his man.

_Both girls lay on the bed late at night, Ashley in a black sports bra and boy shorts while Spencer wore a little blue tank top and her favorite Batman boxers. They had been laying there for hours lightly chatting and not chatting, happy to simply be in the presence of the other._

_Spencer's head rested on Ashley's shoulder while her fingertip lightly traced her own name on the brunette's stomach. Ashley had an arm wrapped around the girl's shoulders loving the feel of Spencer's delicate fingers on her skin. They had been quiet for some time now, and Ashley could practically hear Spencer thinking. _

_With a small squeeze she teased, "I told you, thinking is something you should avoid Spence."_

_Spencer scoffed, rolling on top of the brunette, straddling the girl's hips. Ashley's hand immediately rested on the blonde's thighs, a smile covering her face. _

"_Ash, we need a contract." Ashley simply lifted her eyebrow, amused at Spencer's serious and determined face. The blonde reached towards the bedside table grabbing a black sharpie that was resting there. The blonde uncapped the pen, looking down at the beautiful brunette girl, a mischievous smile on her face. _

_Before Ashley could fully comprehend what was happening, she felt the tip of the pen writing on her bare stomach. Ashley began to squirm a little, the felt tip tickling her stomach. In situations like this, the brunette knew it was better for everyone to just allow Spencer to get her crazy out rather than fight it. _

_Ashley's eyes were alive with mirth and curiosity as the blonde dragged the marker across her skin. "What exactly are you writing?"_

_Spencer's lips quirked into a smile, loving that Ashley wasn't shoving her off. "You, Ashley Davies, promise to love me forever, even though I annoy you endlessly. You promise to watch old movies with me and never ever eat the last PopTart. And I, Spencer Carlin, promise to love you forever, even though you refuse to agree that Tina Fey and I could become best friends. I promise to always dance with you when no one is around and to never ever clean up the messes I make in the kitchen." _

_Ashley smiled at the blonde, furiously scribbling the words on her stomach. She had rolled her eyes only once when the doctor the mentioned the kitchen messes. The brunette's hand stroked the blonde hair out of Spencer's face, her hand resting there, gently cupping the soft cheek. She looked up at Ashley with a gentle smile, finally capping the pen, and pressed the softest kiss on the spy's stomach, sealing their contract. _

Ashley stood there watching it all unfold. She felt numb. She couldn't feel the tears streaming down her face. She could only feel the anticipation of finally killing Snider. Slowly. Methodically. Ashley couldn't see anyone else in the warehouse other than Snider and his two men.

She pulled her gun out and shot both of Snider's men directly between the eyes. She saw Snider jump, and began to look around frantically. He went behind a large crate.

Ashley jumped down from the ledge, placing herself behind a few crates as well, her eyes trained on where Snider would most likely reappear. Her vision blurred as the tears continued to run down her face.

_It was the night after they had returned from their trip to Los Angeles. Ashley's leg hurt like a son of a bitch, and Spencer had given her some pretty strong painkillers earlier. The two were both in bed, cuddled up to one another. Spencer's head was resting on her chest, her small hand slowly stroking Ashley's arm._

"_Ash? Are you awake?" Spencer whispered. Ashley was too tired to comprehend a conversation right now, so she simply remained quiet, her arm tightening its hold on the blonde._

"_I figured you'd be asleep after those pain meds," the blonde admitted, sighing slightly before saying, "I am kind of glad you are. I don't think I could say this to your face without freaking you out. I was so scared in LA Ashley. I was so scared about losing you. _

"_I would have done anything in that moment to make sure you were okay because there are so many things you need to experience, and so much left that I want to do with you." _

_The brunette knew she should speak up, let the girl know she was awake, but there was nothing in this world that could scare her away from the blonde. She was speaking so candidly, and the brunette knew Spencer needed to talk things out so she could make sense of them. So the brunette, guiltily, remained asleep, listening to Spencer speak._

"_I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I want to propose to you with a thousand wild tulips surrounding us. I want to get married to you outside with little white lights surrounding us, making your beautiful face glow. _

"_I want to get a dog with you, and watch you pretend to hate it, but secretly feed it human food. I want to watch you with our son, teaching him how to tie his shoe. And I want to see you with our daughter, reading her one more book, even though it is past her bedtime._

"_I want a life with you. And I want to grow old with you, sitting on our porch swing in the same house we raised our beautiful children in, while you listen to me tell you about the dreams I had the night before."_

_Ashley was wiling her heartbeat to remain steady and strong. She wanted all those things and so much more with the blonde. She wanted every one of Spencer's dreams to come true. _

_The blonde nuzzled further into her, placing a soft kiss on her exposed collarbone. _

"_I just want to keep you, forever." Spencer finally uttered, sleep claiming her almost instantly afterwards. _

Ashley could feel it all now. The life she lost because of Snider, the hot tears streaking down her face, the absolute empty hole that she had become. It was her fault this happened to Spencer, but it was by Snider's hand. Ashley planned to make him pay for that.

"Ashley, I wouldn't shoot if I were you, I have something you may be interested in." And with that Snider emerged, using Spencer as a human shield.

Ashley felt all air leave her lungs when she saw Spencer, her Spencer, alive. There was a large cut on her head, blood dried, but other than that the blonde looked relatively okay. Her hands were tied and she looked terrified and relieved all at once.

Ashley instantly came out of hiding, dropping the gun in her had to the floor. She reached behind her, pulling out the other gun at her waist and dropped it to the floor. Her hands were out in a form of surrender, but her eyes were locked onto Spencer's watering ones.

All thoughts of Snider left Ashley's head, all she could think about was Spencer. She faintly heard noises outside of the warehouse, sirens in the distance, helicopters, but Ashley could only focus on the fact that Spencer wasn't dead. She was alive and staring right back at her.

"Who would have thought that Ashley Davies would fall in love? Would risk it all for some no one in a nowhere town? You couldn't have just let this all go. Just died like a normal human. You had to go and fuck everything up. With your perfect records, and your god damn perfection as an agent."

"Snider, this is all over. Just let her go. You hear all of that outside, right? I've killed your men, the United States government is making their way here. Just let her go."

A voice from a megaphone outside filled the silent warehouse, "The building is surrounded, come out with your hands up before we are forced to use more extreme tactics."

Ashley faintly smiled hearing Madison's voice outside. With that Snider let his grasp of Spencer go and the blonde immediately began running towards Ashley, and Ashley followed suit, the tears still falling freely.

Each step closer to the blonde brought a different memory.

"_You must be Ashley!"_

"_But seriously, I would hate to use my spy moves on that bitch."_

"_Don't worry Ash. I'll protect you." _

"_I truly believe that everything I am and everything I have done has led me to you, and no matter what lifetime, galaxy, or situation, I would love you."_

"_My heart beats out Ashley's."_

"_I am in love with you; I think I've been in love with you since that first day we met. I love that you clean up the messes I make in the kitchen without me noticing, and I love how smart you are. I love that you know how to stop my rambling, but you still let me ramble. I love that you are the sweetest person I know without even knowing it. I love that you use throwing knives to peel apples. I love you for your past, your strength, and, god, your resilience. But what I love the most, the absolute most, is the way you look at me as if I am the best thing in the room."_

And finally Spencer was in her arms again. She could feel the girl crying into her neck. She felt her own tears falling faster and faster. Both girls were whispering I love you's. Ashley kept the girl tight in her arms.

"I thought they killed you" slipped from her lips and Spencer just shook her head, burrowing her face further into Ashley's neck.

The brunette opened her eyes and saw that sickening smile on Snider's face. He raised his gun, aiming it at Spencer and pulled the trigger. Ashley spun the girl around, throwing her to the floor as the two bullets ripped through herself; one hitting her left shoulder, the other getting lodged in her lower back.

Ashley could hear Spencer shriek out her name, as she fell down to one knee. The brunette locked her eyes onto Spencer's before she warily stood up and faced Snider. She could feel blood everywhere. And she could barely stand, bent over slightly.

Snider smirked, "They may be outside Davies, but this, between you and I, ends here." He fired again, hitting her right in the quad. Ashley fell down to one knee. She could hear Spencer crying behind her, but Ashley motioned with her hand to stay back. Snider was down to one bullet, and both of them knew that.

"I am going to use this last bullet to end you, and then I am going to reload and kill your blonde whor-"

Snider was cut off by Ashley's sudden movement. He pulled the trigger one last time, the bullet ripping through Ashley's chest, as the large knife Ashley had stored in her boot flew into his head, killing him instantly.

Ashley landed on her back, and Spencer was there instantly. The brunette looked up at the crying girl with shaking hands trying to figure out where best to try and stop the bleeding. Ashley gave her girl a slight smile. She had protected her. Ashley faintly heard a team storming through the hallway outside the large room.

Ashley's eyes were drooping when Spencer started speaking, "No, Ashley, no, stay with me. Don't you dare close your eyes. Please." The girl was crying so hard.

Ashley managed to place her hand on top of one of Spencer's.

"Spence- Baby, don't cry." Spencer's tears seemed to double upon hearing Ashley's quiet voice and the term of endearment.

"My time with you was worth everything." Ashley coughed, she could taste the blood in her mouth. "I would gladly trade my life for one kiss, one moment of being in love with you. The greatest thing I will ever do is to die loving and protecting you."

Spencer was crying hysterically now, her forehead pressed against Ashley's sweaty one. Ashley's head was resting gingerly in Spencer's lap, as the blonde gripped onto her hands like it was her only lifeline.

Ashley's eyes were getting heavy, and she could hear Spencer whimpering please over and over again. "Spencer, I love you," was the last thing Ashley remembered before her world faded to black.

* * *

Ashley groaned at the faint beeping noise and the pain radiating through her entire body. She was so very tired, but she had no idea what was happening or where she was. She barely managed to crack an eye open.

White walls, small bed, terrible smell = hospital. She felt sleep pulling her back, her eyes beginning to close again, when they landed on a small figure slumped over the side of her bed. She recognized her leather jacket, and the girl wrapped up in it. She felt the hand clinging to hers firmly.

Ashley gathered all the strength she could, giving the small hand a firm squeeze before she fell back into the blackness.

* * *

Ashley felt that pull once again. The noise around her was fuzzy. There was beeping and a voice. She strained to make out any words.

"…I am never without it (anywhere

you go, my dear…"

She fought with herself to come into the world. The pain overwhelmed her, breathing was terribly difficult, but she focused on the soft voice pulling her through the fog.

"…here is the deepest secret nobody knows…"

And her eyes slowly opened, immediately landing on the blonde she dreamed about, seemingly, all her life. She was a mess, bags under her eyes, hair everywhere, stuck in a pair of scrubs, wrapped in Ashley's infamous leather jacket, and hunched over a book.

"…and this is the wonder that's keeping stars apart

I carry your heart (I carry it in my heart)"

Ashley gathered all her strength for the blonde sitting vigil by her bedside. With a terribly raspy voice she whispered, "And here I thought you were more of a Neruda fan."

Spencer froze upon hearing the voice she cried, pleaded, and begged to hear for the last two and a half weeks. She was terrified to look up from her book to find a sleeping Ashley Davies, but her eyes flooded with tears of hope. Blue eyes finally met the deep brown that Spencer had fallen in love with.

In the warehouse, after Ashley had closed her eyes, Spencer's doctor instincts kicked in. She applied pressure to the chest wound, the other three not being as severe, as the police and Madison made their way into the giant room. Spencer called for help, and Ashley was quickly flown to the closest hospital.

Spencer sat with Madison in the waiting room while Ashley faced hours of surgery. The blonde had barely noticed when Madison forced her to get stitches for the cut on her head. The blonde had called her father telling him Ashley had been shot four times. Before she could explain anything, her father told her that she would see them as soon as they could get a flight to Los Angeles.

Ashley survived the surgery, but the doctors told her there was no telling if she would wake up. The wounds had been intense and severe; the bullet that hit Ashley's chest was mere millimeters away from her heart. So Spencer waited. Day and night she never left Ashley's bedside.

When the brunette became stable enough, Spencer had her transported to her hospital back home. There, Spencer wouldn't have to argue with stupid nurses, or bribe people to get around visiting hours. There, Spencer was able to compose herself enough to explain to her family who Ashley was and what had really happened, well at least a summary of the story.

So she continued to sit. Her family visited her and Ashley everyday, each one taking turns to bring Spencer food, allowing her time to shower at the hospital, never leaving Ashley alone. Spencer insisted the brunette was not to be left alone because she had spent most of her life that way.

Madison had camped out in the hospital, staying in Spencer and Ashley's recently empty home. Spencer also got the pleasure of meeting Ashley's D.C. contact. But none of that really mattered. All that mattered was the sleeping girl by her side.

Three days ago Spencer had felt the lifeless hand squeeze her own. Spencer felt a new sense of hope and patiently waited for any more signs of Ashley waking up.

And now, now she saw her beautiful spy struggling to take in her surroundings. Spencer stood up from her chair, and brought a cup of water to Ashley's parched lips, her blue eyes never once leaving Ashley's.

Ashley's hand slowly came up, and wiped away the tears staining Spencer's face, smiling softly at her girl.

"Hi."

"Hi."


	29. Epilogue: The Aftermath

**AN: So now that you have officially forgotten this story, I decided to upload the last chapter! Thank you so much for your kind words, favorites, support, and patience with me and finishing this story! It was a crazy ride, and I apologize for taking forever, but it was 237 pages of awesomeness. I may be back one day with a Faberry story, or maybe even another South one, but for now, thank you and I hope you enjoy the conclusion of our two favorite girls (all 18 pages of it)!**

Epilogue: The Aftermath

Spencer rushed out of the driver's seat to open the door for the brunette. It was Ashley's first day of freedom, and the couple found themselves outside of Arthur Carlin's home.

It had been months, months of rest, months of rehab, and a couple of surgeries to get Ashley back to optimal health. The spy had assumed dating a doctor would speed up the process of leaving the hospital, but Spencer was insistent that the brunette remained and got 24-hour care for as long as anyone else.

The wounds to Ashley's shoulder and leg healed fairly quickly, Ashley's body being used to the abuse, but the bullets that hit Ashley in the back and chest caused more trouble. The bullet to her back was close to her spine, causing swelling, and temporary loss of her ability to walk. But the couple took it in stride, rehabbing her legs, and Ashley getting pretty good at the wheelchair.

It wasn't uncommon to see the brunette giving the young doctor a ride from patient's room to patient's room in the hospital. Ashley easily charmed the nurses, and the couple essentially had an entire playground in the hospital. During Ashley's stay at the hospital, the blonde never stayed away from the brunette for long. She moved into Ashley's hospital room, finding comfort in having the spy close by.

The aftermath of the shooting and Snider had been a little strange. The government issued Ashley a formal apology, even awarding her for her bravery. She was offered the position of head of the Los Angeles CIA branch, but the brunette happily turned it down; she had already found where she would spend the rest of her life. Madison was then offered the promotion. News of the story swept the nation, and Ashley only did one interview, for the small local newspaper, in the tiny town she had grown to love. The single issue made the paper more money than the last four years combined.

Spencer's family finally got to hear the whole story behind the couple's relationship. It changed nothing except the proud gleam in Arthur's eyes knowing Ashley was in fact a good guy, and Glen asking a series of questions related to James Bond. Chelsea affirmed that despite being a spy, she would kick the brunette's ass if she ever scared them like that again. It took Clay over twenty minutes to calm the slightly hysterical artist.

Ashley grabbed the hand Spencer offered to help her out of the car. The spy could only smile when seeing the blonde rush around in effort to help her. Ashley felt good, not 100%, but good nonetheless. Despite that, she allowed the blonde to fuss over her because it made Spencer feel better about the situation.

With her arm wrapped around the blonde's shoulders, and Spencer's small hand gripping her waist the two walked towards the front door.

"Baby, you know you didn't have to do all of this, right? I would have been happy just going to our home and cuddling with you on the couch."

Spencer blushed slightly hearing the term of endearment. It still sent shivers down her spine whenever Ashley would call her that. The blonde placed a gentle kiss on the hand hanging off her shoulders.

"I know, but the family was excited to get you back."

The couple entered and was met with the entire extended family. Arthur, Glen, Chelsea, Clay, Staci, baby Susie, and the newest addition, Madison. Big smiles and hugs were given to both girls as they were ushered to the backyard for the welcome home BBQ.

Ashley was seated at the picnic table with Madison as the two spies tried to teach Chelsea how to use throwing knives, Clay looked terrified at the idea of his girlfriend's newly found hobby. Glen kept yelling "Badass!" every other minute or so while Staci gave him a loving eye roll.

Spencer enjoyed sitting back and watching her family. She had been terrified that she would never get this again, but Ashley was alive, everything was all right.

The blonde smiled when she felt her father's familiar hand resting on her shoulder. Arthur smiled too, as he watched his family goofing about. They were perfect, and he was happy that they were all apart of each other's lives.

"I'm so happy for you Sweetpea."

The blonde smiled up at her father, giving his hand a small squeeze.

"Me too."

"Is the surprise all ready?" The two heard a knock at the front door.

Spencer's smile was huge at hearing the noise, "Now it is!"

Ashley watched as her blonde beauty approached her with a sly smile on her face, and a GIANT box in her arms. The brunette could only grin, knowing that the blonde was up to trouble.

"Ashley!"

"Spencer!"

"I may have been a little rash and excited, but I got you- uh, us, a surprise." The blonde said, her eyes glowing in excitement and tinted with a little apprehension. The box in her arms was the only space between the two.

Before the brunette could respond, the box emitted a small bark and out popped the head of a small, adorable puppy.

Ashley could only smile and the sheepish expression on the doctor's face, her arms instantly opening the box and pulling the small puppy out. The puppy happily licked at Ashley's fingers while the brunette looked him over.

"I thought you might want some company at home, and he could be my running buddy since you refuse to go on runs with me, and I don't know, one of the nurses dogs had puppies and I couldn't say no to that face…"

Ashley's laughing effectively cut off the blonde's rambling. Blue eyes caught the most adorable sight of the small lab/pit bull mix licking the spy's face. If Spencer hadn't already loved the brunette, that moment definitely would have sealed the deal.

* * *

Ashley was tired, dead tired, but she happily nursed her beer at the bar. The party was raging around her, and she was happy to be there, happy to support Glen, despite having just returned from India all of 8 hours ago. After all, she wouldn't be a good groomsmen for Glen without attending the bachelor party in his honor.

The brunette nearly ditched the party all together when she walked through her front door and was greeted with the sight of Spencer curled up in the couch reading a book. Two weeks of helping Madison out on a top secret mission was far too long to ever be away from the young doctor, and Ashley made a mental note to decline Madison's pleads next time the CIA _absolutely needs _her for one last mission. Ashley scoffed at the very loose definition of "consultant".

The party had been going on for a couple hours now, and Glen was embarrassingly drunk by now. Ashley had sat at the bar, talking with Glen's friends and texting Spencer who was busy at Staci's bachelorette party. The brunette was about to call it a night and head home, when Glen ungracefully plopped into the stool next to her.

"Ashley!"

The ex-spy smirked at Glen, glad to see him having a good time. "Hey Buddy… How's the party going?"

"Ashley! I'm freaking out!"

The brunette merely met the frantic Glen with a questioning look and a lifted eyebrow.

"I can't believe I am getting married next week! I love Staci, I really do, but MARRIED? That is terrifying. It is so, uh, forever. What if I hate her after a month? Or what if I lose all my game?" Ashley couldn't help but snort at that remark, _what game? _"Or, or, what if I get fat and she ends up divorcing me!"

Ashley began to feel sorry for the frantic boy. She knew Glen loved Staci and Susie with all his heart; this was simply the case of the drunken cold feet.

"Glen, don't worry. You love Staci, and she loves you. This is probably the best and most exciting thing you are going to do. You are making sure that you spend the rest of your life with the woman you love. There is nothing in this world that is better than that."

Glen gave her a disbelieving look; obviously Ashley was going to have to think up something else. The brunette sighed, looking down at her hand holding a beer, a slight smile graced her face when she saw the small pink heart Spencer had drawn near her thumb.

Ashley turned towards the boy, "Glen, what is Staci's favorite food?" The ex-spy thought of her own blonde; _Macaroni and Cheese_.

Glen gave Ashley a very confused look and mumbled out, "Pancakes, she loves pancakes."

"What side of the bed does she sleep on?" _Right side_.

"The left."

"What is your favorite outfit she wears?" _Wrapped up in those loose dark jeans with all the holes, her blue UCLA shirt, and my leather jacket_.

"This bright pink, strappy dress thing."

"What is the best way to make her stop crying?" _Make her laugh while hugging her_.

"Kissing her."

"And what is the most annoying thing that she does?" _Her stubbornness_.

"She always talks during basketball games."

"And is that one of your favorite things about her?" _Yes_.

Glen let out a sigh, and a small smile, "Yes."

"Then I think you will be absolutely fine Glen." Suddenly her phone beeped, and she saw a picture text from Chelsea. Spencer was sitting looking bored out of her mind while getting a lap dance from an absurdly good look man in a Speedo, the text simply read, "WHAT A BIG FAT LESBIAN!"

Ashley couldn't help but laugh, her heart fluttering slightly at seeing her girl.

The blonde boy saw the goofy grin on Ashley's face, and simply replied, "Looks like I will be having this same chat with you pretty soon."

The brunette could only beam in response.

* * *

Spencer's back was pressed against the shelf. She was clutching a few items as though they were her only lifelines, while she slowly leaned forward to peak around the corner. Her heart was pounding, and her breathing was shallow; she knew she was in danger, but she there was no turning back now.

Spencer and Ashley were in a pretty heated round of tag, and the brunette was currently it. They were approaching hour seven, starting early in the morning. Spencer had pounced on the sleeping brunette after her and Teddy finished their morning run. The blonde peppered Ashley with sweet kisses while Teddy happily barked at them.

Ashley's smile was large when she cracked one eye open to look at her assailant. Spencer leaned down placing a soft, sweet kiss on the girl's lips, which was swiftly followed with a smack on the top of Ashley's head and Spencer squealing, "You're it!"

The game had been going ever since, time-outs only for very important and serious matters (small, heated make-out sessions), with a couple of casualties: death to a glass of orange juice during breakfast, Spencer re-breaking a microwave Ashley had just finished fixing for Mrs. Cooper, and most recently a display tower of Oreos two isles down from Spencer's current location.

Spencer quickly turned the corner, making it to the bread isle. The girls had split the grocery list for fairness and efficiency, but there would be no pausing the game; Ashley loved chasing Spencer down.

As she grabbed a loaf of bread, the blonde began to regret not grabbing a basket to carry her items; she was worried it would hold her back. Spencer smiled thinking about her day. She must have looked insane when Ashley tackled her into the grass right outside of the hospital, not to mention her own maniacal laughter and mad dash following her tagging Ashley after exiting the hardware store. But it was stuff like this that Spencer lived for and she was so glad that Ashley always played with her.

Spencer still woke up every now and then from a nightmare about losing Ash, watching her get shot over and over again. But the blonde found comfort in being wrapped up in Ashley's arms hearing the quiet and reassuring "I'm okay. I'm right here," whispered into her ear. So it was moments like this, a daylong marathon game of tag that helped to balance out the scars that both Ashley and Spencer shared. It was the love and understanding that could turn a terrible night into the most fun day.

Spencer could see the promise land. She was a few feet from the check out counter, almost ready to make her escape, when she felt strong arms wrap around her from behind and a raspy voice whisper, "You're it."

Spencer smiled, leaning back into Ashley embrace. Despite having fun running around like children (and the three make-out sessions), Spencer had missed the contact from the brunette. After Glen's wedding things had been hectic for both of them, so she relished in the feeling of being in Ashley's arms whenever she could.

Spencer turned around in the brunette's grasp, effectively smooshing the bread and other items between them, but smiled at the brunette nevertheless.

"You caught me."

"I did."

"Did you remember to buy the peanut butter?"

"I did."

"I ruined our bread."

Ashley looked at the sad loaf of bread between them.

"Do you love me?"

"I did."

"Ashley!"

"What? I really wanted a sandwich for dinner!"

* * *

Spencer let out a small sigh and smiled as she walked up to her apartment. She could already hear Teddy barking his little head off to greet her. He was literally the most excitable dog in the world, and may or may not be slightly insane, but he fit perfectly into the Carlin family dynamic.

It had been a long day, early start at the paper to finish up a last minute article, followed by a full day at the hospital. It wouldn't have been so bad if she got to have her usual lunch with Ashley, but the brunette had to go to Los Angeles yesterday to buy a few items she needed for her shop. Before coming home, Spencer had to swing by said store to grab some keys the ex-spy asked Spencer to bring home.

After retiring officially from CIA work (again), Ashley had been bored out of her mind. She fixed _everything _in their apartment (even squeaky floor boards), then moved on to helping their nice neighbor Mrs. Cooper. Ashley enjoyed helping the widow, and the old woman enjoyed the company. People around town caught wind of Spencer's girl being able to fix anything, so people began bringing things for Ashley to repair.

It had driven both girls a little crazy when at all hours of the day they seemed to be interrupted by the sweet, but admittedly bizarre, citizens of the town. So Ashley decided to open a little store. It was a running challenge in town to bring Ashley the most run down and seemingly out of shape items, and the brunette never failed to return them in perfect working order.

Ashley never charged anyone for her services, but the patrons had taken to giving her presents in exchange. Children brought handmade art in exchange for their toys being fixed, baked goods were frequently sent, as well as strange little knickknacks that the brunette seemed to be interested in.

Spencer loved watching Ashley take things apart and put them back together again. The first night Ashley officially opened, and then closed, Spencer dragged the brunette into the back room and showed Ashley just how much she loved watching her.

Just as Spencer was about to turn the door handle her phone began ringing, the theme song to _Mission Impossible_. The blonde's smile got wider, knowing the brunette was calling. She shuffled around her purse finally finding her phone and answering.

"Hi Ash."

"Hey Baby."

Spencer pushed open the door, smiling down at Teddy, "Did you find the part yo-" the question died in her throat when she looked up to see the entire apartment covered in vases and vases of flowers, all the lights were off, but the room was glowing in soft candle light. Sitting on the beloved ikea table was a beautiful wooden box with a single white lily placed on top.

The blonde was in a trance and with a shaky voice she whispered out, "A thousand wild tulips."

Spencer almost jumped when she heard Ashley's voice through the phone, "Spencer, I have lived for 29 years, but I was never living until my eyes met yours in that coffee shop a forever ago.

I have faced death more times than I can count, but the only thing that has truly terrified me is the thought that I wouldn't wake up every morning looking at you; I wouldn't feel your hand softly stroking my stomach while we watch TV; or that I wouldn't be able to spend the rest of my life trying to be the person that deserves your love."

Spencer was fairly positive she hadn't taken a breath since she spotted the flowers covering her apartment. The blonde had taken small steps towards the beautiful wooden box on the table. She was vaguely aware of the tears clouding her sight when Ashley continued speaking.

"You have become everything I never knew I wanted, my family, my best friend, and the love of my life, and for that I can never thank you. I could do a million things, go all over the world, but all I will ever want is to be with you, by your side, holding your hand, and covering your eyes during the scary parts."

Spencer finally reached the table; her shaking hand lightly traced the wooden box on the table. She saw the keyhole on the box, and realized why the keys from Ashley's shop were so important.

"Not everything is going to be like we want it to be, and I am sure that we will fight, and have hardships, but I can honestly say I will never give up on you, on us. I don't believe in many things, but I believe in you. I believe that all my hopes and dreams rest solely in your hands. You have always been my greatest weakness, but my most valuable strength. You're my home Spence, you always have been."

Spencer fit the old antique key that was nicely nestled with the others on the ring into the lock, and heard a soft click; a small black jewelry box rested inside.

"So let me spend the rest of my days telling you that Poptarts aren't a healthy breakfast option, let me chase away spiders you trap under coffee mugs, let me remind you how much you are loved and cherished everyday. I have had hundreds of different names in my life, but let me change my name one last time. Let me call you my wife, and buy you a house, and raise a family with you. Please Spencer, please marry me?"

Spencer finally opened the small velvet box, slightly gasping when nothing was inside.

"You have to say 'yes' first." Ashley voice rang out, not through the phone, but from the doorway of their bedroom. The brunette looked shy, her right hand holding up a beautiful shining ring. Neither girl processed the noise of Spencer's cell phone falling to the floor.

The brunette could only laugh through her tears when Spencer flung into her arms and tackled her to the ground.

* * *

"Spence, I can't do this anymore." The brunette huffed, flopping down on the couch next to her fiancée (soon to be wife, thank you very much).

The blonde placed a sympathetic hand on the ex-spy's thigh, "What did she do now?"

"Chelsea thinks it would be a good idea if I do back flips down the isle."

Spencer burst out laughing, imagining the brunette, in a white dress cart-wheeling down the isle.

"Speeennncceeerrrr. I love Chelsea, I do. She means well, but that baby is making her absolutely crazy. This wedding is turning into a circus instead of a way to make you my wife. I mean the guest list is already 400 people."

Spencer smiled. She may have let the highly hormonal Chelsea be in charge of planning their wedding (Clay almost cried out of relief knowing that Chelsea would be busy with the wedding instead of constantly breaking up and getting back together with him for causing a "demon spawn" to grow inside of her), and yes there were doves involved, and she may have invited nearly the entire town, and the cake might have been flown in from Italy, but it made the young artist so happy.

Spencer cuddled into the brunette, grabbing Ashley's arm and wrapping it around her own shoulders. Ashley couldn't help her smile when she felt the blonde cuddle up to her.

Ashley placed a gentle kiss to Spencer's temple and quietly said, "I just want to be your wife already; I don't care about all this other stuff."

Spencer slowly stroked the girl's stomach, placing a soft kiss on Ashley's collarbone. They sat quietly together on the couch, watching the clock tick away. It was 11:20 at night, with only 67 hours until their wedding and the blonde knew Ashley was anxious and nervous to be open and vulnerable in front of that many people. Ashley had come far from the girl Spencer initially met, but that did not mean the ex-spy wanted to parade her deepest emotions and feelings to hundreds of relative strangers. Spencer, on the other hand, would gladly write a daily column at the newspaper detailing every reason her heart jumped because of Ashley.

And suddenly Spencer was up in a flash, quickly kissing the surprised Ashley on the lips before rushing out of the living room, cell phone in hand.

Ashley couldn't decide if she was highly amused, or completely annoyed that Spencer was dragging her towards the baseball field an hour and a half later. The blonde had disappeared for almost 45 minutes and then reemerged forcing the brunette to change out of pajamas and follow her.

The brunette caught sight of two figures standing on the pitcher's mound on their favorite baseball diamond. As the two got closer, their hands linked together, Ashley realized it was the Captain Harris and his wife. Ashley loved old Captain Harris; they spent hours together in her shop talking about the Captain's time on his boat 20 years ago. Ashley would never admit it, but her favorite stories were actually the ones he told about his wife Lucille. Spencer tugged on Ashley's hand stopping their progress to the couple.

"I think we should get married."

Ashley lifted her eyebrow, "I'm sorry, did we travel back in time? I believe the 32 pound wedding cake was an indication that we agreed upon that."

Spencer smiled, shaking her head softly, "I mean right now, just the two of us. Let's get married."

And then it clicked in Ashley's head; the Captain could officially marry them, Mrs. Harris would be the witness. They could get married, no doves, no strangers, nothing but the two of them, and in the place where the solidified their relationship, in the place where they could always find each other.

Ashley leaned into the blonde, kissing her gently, very aware of the couple watching their every move. A small squeeze of her hand, and both girls finished their walk to the older couple.

Before the ceremony started, both girls swore no one would ever know about getting pre-married, understanding that a very scary Chelsea would deal them a slow and painful death.

The girls stood on the pitcher's mound, holding each other's hands listening to the quiet sniffling of Mrs. Harris as the Captain began.

"Ladies and gentlemen, we are gathered here this lovely night to witness the union of Spencer Carlin and Ashley Davies…"

* * *

Teddy had some gene in him that transformed him from a normal sized dog to a giant. The friendly brown dog resembled the size of an underfed bear, and the Carlin's (Spencer still got giddy every time someone called Ashley Mrs. Carlin) needed to move and expand.

It hadn't taken long to pick a place, but Spencer hadn't anticipated Ashley falling in love with the completely run down house on Oak St. that was literally two weeks away from getting bulldozed. For the entirety of Spencer's life that house had been a sad looking reminder of what a house could turn into, but the bright eyes and hopeful look on her wife's face made it impossible to turn down.

It had taken time, but they finally finished fixing the place up. Well, Ashley had fixed the place up, while Spencer drank beer and had every intention to help but when Ashley said things like "load-bearing walls" and "did you use a level?" Spencer lost her shit and attacked the poor girl with a mass amount of kisses (among other things).

The house was beautiful, and looked brand new, and Spencer was so glad that this is where they would move their new life. They had been moving all day, and Spencer was standing in her now empty old apartment, taking in all the memories the place held.

It was no surprise to the blonde, that her most fond memories all included a certain brunette, and that her own life seemed to start only when the ex-spy literally fell into her arms at the doorway.

Spencer felt strong arms slip around her waist, and Ashley's chin rest on her shoulder. The brunette slowly started swaying them side-to-side.

"I'm going to miss this place." Spencer whispered feeling herself getting a little teary eyed.

"Me too. It was the first place that ever felt like home." Ashley admitted, hiding her blush in Spencer's neck.

"My mother always told me if you aren't moving forward you are moving backwards. I know our new house will be a wonderful new step for us, but god, this one holds so much."

Ashley let go of the blonde, only to lead her into their empty bedroom. She pulled Spencer into the closet with her, and moved towards the very back corner. It was difficult to see anything back there, but the brunette used her phone to light up the area.

Ashley reached down and pulled a knife out of her boot (a habit Spencer could not rid Ashley of) and much to Spencer's horror began carving something into the wall.

Spencer tried to see what Ashley was doing, but finally gave up. Eventually Ashley pulled away from her work and Spencer could see what she had done. There, forever branded into the wall was a simple "Spencer + Ashley were here". The blonde smiled and turned towards the brunette, with a slightly confused face.

Ashley smiled, holding one of Spencer's hands, "This place will always be a part of us, a part of everything we have become to one another, and now, we will always be a part of this place, forever."

Spencer smiled and kissed her wife. When she pulled back she grabbed the knife out of Ashley's hand and turned back to the wall. She carved a heart around the small engraving Ashley had done. Spencer turned back to a smiling Ashley.

"Let's go home Ash."

"Yea, let's go home."

* * *

Spencer drummed her fingers along the counter staring at her watch, _One minute and 32 seconds_.

She was nervous and anxious, and really wished that Ashley had some how created a space-time continuum because the brunette was just that smart. The blonde could hear Teddy snoring in the bedroom, and knew Ashley was somewhere downstairs, probably reading the morning paper.

_Two minutes and 27 seconds. _

Spencer fought the urge to rip out all her hair, and remained silent for 33 seconds. With unsteady hands the blonde grabbed the little strip and stared at it. She checked the box three times before letting out a little scream and running out of the bathroom looking for Ashley.

Ashley was up and running the second she heard Spencer upstairs. The brunette was silently cursing the blonde for keeping all her guns locked away in their bedroom when there was obviously danger around them, at all times.

Ashley's panic halted when she caught sight of the laughing and crying Spencer running down the stairs and an excitable Teddy following.

"Ash! It worked! It worked! I love you so much!" The blonde exclaimed as she literally jumped into Ashley's arms Teddy happily jumping around the couple.

"Spence, what the hell are you-" and Ashley stopped midsentence when she noticed what Spencer was clutching, a small piece of plastic that had two perfect pink strips in the reader box.

(A/N: Let's all pretend this is actually a possibility in their reality because this is an ideal world) They had seen a number of doctors over the last few months, and it was finally a connection Ashley had made a few years ago that said it could be done.

The two girls had decided it was time to fill up some of the empty bedrooms in their house, so they went to see insemination specialist after insemination specialist. Unfortunately, due to the years of damage Ashley's body had undergone during her time in the CIA, she was unable to become pregnant, but the brunette merely shrugged off the information, gently kissing Spencer and telling her how beautiful she will look carry their children.

Ashley had read a few years ago about a procedure that took morrow from a female and was able to be used in the same way as sperm. After numerous talks, preparation, and a few tries it seemed that Ashley and Spencer had finally created a perfect little zygote inside of Spencer.

Ashley was in shock, but she twirled Spencer around in her arms, peppering kisses all over her face. Spencer squealed when Ashley scooped Spencer into her arms bridal style and carried her to the couch. Ashley had always treated Spencer like she was the most precious thing in the planet, but there was something about the way Ashley laid her down on the couch, and the twinkle in her eye that made Spencer know she was being treated with the utmost care.

The brunette was smiling so widely it looked like she was about to crack. Spencer's hand reached up to cup her cheek, grinning right back at the girl. Ashley kissed her palm, and then bent down placing the softest kiss on Spencer's stomach.

"I'm carrying you everywhere for the next 8 months."

Spencer could only roll her eyes.

"Can we hire Glen to fan me while I'm being carried?"

"We don't need him, I can do that too."

"Ashley, you are not going to lock me up in this house to keep me and the baby safe from the outside world," Spencer deadpanned. She knew how her girl worked, and while she loved Ashley for her alpha protector tendencies, she really needed fresh air and social contact.

Ashley was still grinning and replied, "We'll see."

They were quiet for a moment, Ashley softly stroking Spencer's stomach, while Spencer looking on lovingly.

Finally, brown eyes sought out the perfect blue ones, "I love you so much Spencer. So, so much."

Spencer smiled at her wife, her heart overflowing with a million different emotions. "I love you too, Ash." The two shared a soft kiss, "Now carry me to the bedroom."

Ashley could only laugh when she scooped her girl into her arms.

* * *

Ashley had a photographic memory, so she rarely forgot anything. She could tell you the color of her favorite pair of shoes from 8th grade, and recite a passage she had to read aloud in high school, but there were certain memories that Ashley not only remembered, but were seemingly seared into her DNA. Most revolved around her beautiful wife, meeting her, their first kiss, etc, but the birth of their daughter was one Ashley cherishes the most:

The beautiful, serene look on Spencer's face when their daughter was placed in the blonde's arms for the first time; her strong little lungs screaming out, her tiny eyes staring up at them, and her little fists reaching out towards Ashley's own hand.

They had only been out of the hospital for a week, and Ashley was still floating on cloud 9. She was terrified for when her daughter got older because Ashley knew now that she would be able to get anything she wanted out of her. Hopefully, Spencer could be the responsible one; Ashley laughed to herself at that thought.

Ashley crept into the nursery. It was close to four in the morning, but Ashley couldn't help herself. The two most perfect girls on the planet surrounded the ex-spy and she really wanted one of them to be awake with her.

She reached into the small crib and scooped her daughter into her arms. Her little head sported a small tuft of brown hair, and the tiny blue eyes that were so much like her mother's greeted Ashley.

"Hi Emmy." Emily Paula Carlin was beautiful, perfect, and Ashley was positive she was placed on this earth just so she could love this tiny creature in her arms and her crazy, silly mother. Ashley began gently rocking her daughter.

"You know, you really tuckered out your Mommy. But don't worry; she is the best person I have ever met. You are so lucky to have such a wonderful Mom."

Emily gave a little gurgle in response, and Ashley decided that was her agreeing. "I am so glad that you are here. Your mom and I were waiting for you for a long time. I am going to teach you so many things, like how to fix a car, or how to wink and flip your hair and it will drive boys and girls crazy, and don't tell your mom, but I am totally teaching you how to use throwing knives."

Spencer had woken up to an empty bed, and immediately knew she wanted to rectify the situation. She didn't think it would be possible, but becoming pregnant and giving birth to Little Emily only made her fall deeper in love with her beautiful wife. Spencer knew she was the luckiest woman on the planet, and was so thankful to be this lucky in life. She padded her way down the hall, having a sneaking suspicion where her wife could be. She smiled as she leaned on the doorframe of the nursery listening to her two girls. Ashley's back was to the door, but all the hairs on her neck stood up.

"And even if you decide cheerleading is your thing, I will still love you. One other thing I will definitely teach you, is to always know when your mother is trying to eavesdrop on conversations."

Spencer let out a little laugh. She would never stop trying to sneak up on the brunette despite failing, seemingly, millions of times. The blonde made her way over to the girls, her chin rested on Ashley's shoulder, a quick kiss pressed into her shoulder, and her hand came up to stroke her daughter's chubby little cheek.

"What are you two doing up?"

Ashley smiled softly, "Just a little girl talk Baby, nothing you need to worry about."

Spencer led Ashley and Emily to the little loveseat that was set up in the room, immediately cuddling into both girls when they were all settled.

"Hi Em, did Mommy wake you up?" Spencer cooed at their daughter, a nice, teasing tone in her voice.

Spencer leaned into Ashley, kissing her softly on the lips.

"I love you so very much." She said overwhelmed with how perfect her life was at the moment.

The brunette smiled, replying with a simple "I know."

Ashley finally looked away from Spencer's loving eyes to the small baby in her arms.

"Hey Emily, have I told you about how you mother and I met? Oh, no? Well, you are in for a treat little girl! It all started in a coffee shop and the Garfield comics in the paper…"

* * *

"Cooper?"

"As in Anderson? No way, he will get some complex because he will feel the pressure to be as worldly and perfect as Anderson Cooper." The blonde argued, as if her reasoning was so obvious.

Ashley chuckled, shaking her head a little. They were cuddled up on the couch determined to pick a baby name. Spencer was already 6 months along with their son, and they couldn't decide on anything.

"Emily is really pushing for the name Salt. We could just go with that and call it a day." Ashley suggested, a little grin painting her face.

Spencer couldn't help but giggle. Their daughter was a precocious 2-year-old; she was such a perfect blend of the two of them: curly, wild brunette hair, those Carlin baby blues mixed with Ashley's intelligence and Spencer's sense of mischief and adventure. Needless to say, it had been a busy two years.

Em was currently hanging out with her cousins at Chelsea and Clay's place, much to the protests of her dear Grandfather. Arthur loved watching all his grandchildren, and was always offended if babysitting duties were passed on to someone else. But Chelsea had demanded Emily's presence at their house, and Glen had conveniently decided to drop his kids there too.

Spencer would probably have to bake a giant cake for Chelsea to make up for it.

Ashley had taken the week off from the store. This pregnancy was a little harder on Spencer than the last, and Ashley insisted that Spencer take a mini vacation from the hospital and the newspaper. It was either spend a week at home hanging out or Ashley would literally carry her bridal style everywhere and not just around the house like she had done the first time around.

Spencer liked to humor her girl, so she allowed her to act as crazy as she wanted.

Ashley threw the baby name book on the table, sighing in slight defeat.

"We could take the hippie route and the first thing we see outside can be his name."

Spencer tried to picture it, but soon grimaced, "I don't think Sandbox Carlin would really work for him."

The two sat in silence for a little, enjoying the quiet and being cuddled together. Ashley lived for these moments. Over the years, nothing had deterred her love for the blonde, it seemingly growing and expanding every day instead. She loved waking up with her two girls snuggled in the bed, or going to the Sunday BBQ's with the _whole_ family. It was something she had never pictured for herself in a million years, but something she knew she couldn't have lived without.

Spencer's fingers were lightly tracing the bullet wound scar on Ashley's shoulder, while softly humming to herself. Blue eyes poured over their beautiful living room. It was covered in photos of perfect moments, and cherished memories.

A black and white photo of them on their wedding day; a beautiful photo of them standing on the pitcher's mound on their secret wedding day; pictures of baking projects gone wrong, eggs and flour happily covering the couple; a picture of the newly formed family the day Emily was born; pictures of family BBQ's and trips to the beach, Em's first steps, and so on. It chronicled their life together, and Spencer got giddy knowing there was still so much more to come. Her eyes finally landed on the photo of a young Ashley with both her parents.

"What about Chris, or I guess Christopher? For your mother, her name was Christine right?"

Ashley looked at Spencer, her wonderful and perfect wife, and tears instantly made their way into her eyes when she gave her girl a small nod.

Spencer smiled at Ashley, never getting tired of making the other woman happy. "Perfect, Christopher Bryant Carlin."

Ashley nodded her in agreement, fighting the small knot that had lodged in her throat, "Yea, perfect."

Spencer leaned in kissing Ashley, "We can call him Salt for short."

* * *

It was of Ashley's rare days off. The brunette sat in the coffee house, casually sipping her coffee and reading the morning paper, despite it being afternoon. Ashley had noted the broken video camera in the corner, the two high school kids who were obviously ditching, and the 30-something man working on his computer. After all these years the ex-spy still scanned the room for possible dangers.

Ashley flipped her paper towards the comic section looking for the new Garfield strip, knowing how much Emily and Chris liked to read it as well. Ashley had closed the shop to deal with a parent-teacher conference with Emily's teacher, and decided to give herself the rest of the day off.

She needed to grab more paper towels from the store, and find that part for Mr. Sandoval's lawn mower, and a few other things, but the brunette pushed that all aside; today was her day off after all.

The brunette smiled, and lowered her paper, instantly being struck with an odd sense of déjà vu. Spencer stood in front of her, hair disheveled, eyes wide and bright, old jeans and chucks securely in place.

Spencer had rushed into the coffee shop, running a little late because she had gotten distracted at the paper because her editor at the publishing house had called her and wanted to finalize the cover of Spencer's 3rd installment of her young adult novel series. But as the blonde yanked open the door and spotted Ashley quietly sitting there, hoodie and jeans, face buried in the paper, she was rushed back to almost exactly ten years ago when she had first seen her.

The blonde smirked at her wife, "You must be Ashley! I am soo sorry I am late. I got caught up choosing a cover for my latest novel."

Ashley smiled fondly at her wife, deciding to play along, "Novel? You are a writer?"

Spencer plopped down into the seat right next to her wife, leaning in to whisper, "Yes. My wife encouraged me to publish my series of stories, the kids really love them."

The brunette grinned when she felt Spencer place a sweet kiss to her lips in greeting. In all this time, with all that they have shared, Ashley's heart still beat a little bit faster when Spencer was around. Ashley quietly wrapped her arm around Spencer's waist while the blonde rested her head on her shoulder.

Spencer reached for Ashley's coffee cup and took a sip, grimacing at the taste.

Ashley smiled lovely at the girl, "You would think that after all this time you would know not to drink my coffee."

Spencer grinned when she replied, "What can I say, I am a glutton for punishment."

Spencer's hand rubbed up and down Ashley's leg.

"I was looking for this in the morning." Ashley complained, tugging on the sleeve of the leather jacket Spencer had stolen.

"Well, I barely got to talk to you or the kids yesterday, and I had to go into the hospital early this morning, so I thought I would take a little piece of you with me." The blonde reasoned, trying to sweet talk her way out of trouble. Ashley shot her a look that obviously meant she wasn't buying it, so Spencer decided to respond how she wanted to initially, "Plus, it looks better on me anyways."

Ashley laughed fairly hard at hearing that. Since she woke up after the whole Snider incident, it was rare that Ashley got to wear her own leather jacket. Spencer had unofficially taken it as her own, claiming that it smelled and felt like the brunette was wrapped around her when she wore it. Ashley didn't mind in the slightest.

"How was Em's meeting? Did her and Chris eat the last of the Poptarts?"

"Good, and no, I hide you a box in the top shelf of the pantry."

Spencer kissed her girl, "I knew there was a reason I married you!"

Ashley smirked, "I am a hundred percent positive it was not because I enable your Poptart addiction."

The blonde leaned in a little closer, "You're right, it was totally for the sex."

Ashley rolled her eyes, and softly bumped her shoulders into the blonde. Looking down at their linked hands, she could see the sparkle of their wedding rings staring back at her.

"Everything is set up for tomorrow. The kids will be with your dad, Teddy will be with Glen, and I fixed that weird noise the Mustang was making."

Spencer smiled at Ashley. The two didn't really celebrate anniversaries in a typical manner (they had never really done anything in a typical manner). Spencer and Ashley didn't celebrate the anniversary of the weddings, nor their first kiss, or even the day that they met in the coffee shop. What they did celebrate was the night (or, rather, early morning) Ashley literally fell into Spencer's arms after her fight with Aiden.

Neither girl ever really explained what or why they were celebrating to their friends and family (they'd probably tell the kids once they got a little older), but the girls always saw that as the beginning of everything. By going to Spencer, Ashley was unknowingly trusting Spencer with everything: her life, her hidden identity, allowing herself to be vulnerable, and Spencer knew in that moment, while she was saving the Ashley's life, they would be tied together, in some way, forever.

It was in that moment, that the strange little encounter transformed from a bizarre, unfortunate sort of date that would be forgotten and ignored as years past by, to two people finding their soul mates. It was the beginning of their life together, and the girls would forever cherish the starting point of what has become the best thing in both their lives.

Both were quiet for a moment, traveling through memories, love, pain, and happiness they shared in the past ten years. Ashley remembered the way Spencer looked as she recited the Neruda poem so long ago. Spencer pictured Ashley taking her hand and propelling her forward on the ice rink. Spencer could remember the rapid beating in her chest when Ashley confessed her love; Ashley could feel Spencer's soft cheek resting in her hand when she told Spencer she would fix the heart she had broken.

They relived kisses and smiles, coffees and tears, moments of absolute joy and bliss, and the moments of pain at almost losing one another. Their story was etched into their minds and hearts forever, living with them like scars and freckles, pieces of their past forever effecting their future.

And they could imagine their future together, the next ten, twenty, fifty years. They pictured Emily's first date, and Chris's graduation. They pictured slow dancing under the stars when both their babies were away in college, they saw the laughs and smiles, the happiness and excitement their future held. And they saw themselves old and happy, watching grandchildren as Spencer tried to analyze the dream Ashley had the night before.

It didn't take much to see both the past and the future; they saw it when they looked into each other's eyes. They felt it in the other's arms. They knew it in the way their hearts would skip a beat, or their lips still tingled from the lightest of kisses.

Spencer gave her wife's hand a soft squeeze bringing them back to reality. She placed a gentle kiss on the other woman's cheek.

The blonde leaned towards Ashley's ear whispering the secret she had given to Ashley so many years ago, "I love you because I know no other way than this: where _I _does not exist, nor _you_."

The brunette smiled, hearing the words that had wrecked her ten years ago, and replied with her own secret that would always be Spencer's, "You are the only reason I'm alive."

The end.


	30. Merry Christmas, Darling (epilogue pt 2)

**A/N: Hi everyone! I just wanted to write this one-shot in the universe, and decided to stick it on the end of this story because 1. having 29 chapters instead of 30 has been bugging me for months 2. I randomly get comments and follows, etc. on this story still and I love you all for that. So enjoy! I don't think there is there a better way to enjoy spring than writing about christmas! (please excuse all mistakes, I just wanted to get this up!)**

Merry Christmas Darling

Over the years of their relationship together, Spencer often likened herself to a scientist reintroducing Ashley to the world. It was a constant introduction, waiting, and negative reaction from the brunette girl who stayed far away from popular culture and normalcy during her years with the CIA.

Despite Ashley's unwillingness to see the art, beauty, and comedy in 90s classics like _Clueless _and _Never Been Kissed_, Spencer was always showing the brunette things she may have missed out on during her hiatus from normal life.

So, it shocked the blonde doctor when Ashley not only embraced Christmas (despite her fairly adamant atheism), but also became a Christmas crazy. The day after Thanksgiving, Spencer would find the brunette pulling out old decorations, looking up local tree farms, and hanging lights EVERYWHERE. All traditions were followed from mistletoe to roasting chestnuts. The brunette even made it a habit to visit the children's wing of the hospital with a large, red velvet bag full of presents.

Ashley's irrational love for the holiday seemed to grow and Spencer couldn't help but love the ex-spy for it. The first year after her, Teddy, and Ash moved into the old house on Oak street, Ashley was all too excited to host the annual Carlin Christmas at their house.

That evening, before everyone arrived, Spencer couldn't help but kiss the brunette breathless when she spotted her beautiful, flour covered wife, with a little red Santa hat pulling the last pie out of the oven. Ashley never did get a chance the finish all the preparation before their guests arrived.

The brightness in Ashley's eyes, and the extra wide grin the brunette gave when she spotted their tree in the living room was enough to get Spencer in the terrible Christmas sweaters and gagging down gross Christmas fruit cake. The sweet peck she would get from Ashley while they snuggled on the couch and watched _It's a Wonderful Life_ was enough for a lifetime of exposure to disgusting cakes.

The first Christmas the girls spent together, it had been Spencer that held almost all the enthusiasm for the holiday while Ashley passively watched. She remembered placing the Santa hat on the brunette's head and receiving a small grin and an eye roll. She remembered stockings and the tears that clouded beautiful brown eyes at seeing the "Ashley" sewn at the top. The blonde was shocked when Ashley sat quietly, laughing along with her when they watched Will Ferrell in _Elf_.

Spencer had known the girl enjoyed the holiday, even without her having to say it, but she never expected Ashley to become the one to bring in the holiday cheer and tradition so adamantly the following year.

Spencer recalled the first Christmas they shared with little Emily. Ashley found the cutest little red jumpers for the 4-month-old baby, phrases ranging from "My first Christmas" to "I have more attitude than the Grinch". It was enough to melt her heart, but when the brunette walked in, their darling daughter in a mini Santa outfit, and both Teddy and Ashley with antlers, she nearly lost her shit. It was easily one of the most precious things Spencer had ever witnessed.

Christmas's over the years with Ashley had been wonderful, and beautiful. They were full of everything Christmas's should have: ice-skating, overly spiked eggnog, strange family encounters, and so, so much love. Their house was _that one_ on the block, showing their (Ashley's) Christmas cheer while bordering on a public safety hazard due to brightness.

But this year, Spencer was a little scared. Emily was finally old enough to really understand Santa and the magic behind the holiday, and baby Christopher was in for a nice treat for his second Christmas. Ashley had been an excited, hot mess about the idea of their children really getting to celebrate the holiday with her.

Ashley tended to be over the top with Christmas without the children's involvement, but Spencer could not imagine how far Ashley would go, especially with their little she-devil Emily egging her on. Spencer would be mildly surprised if they didn't end up with 12 reindeer living in her back yard.

It was t-minus 6 days until Christmas Eve and the blonde looked forward to/dreaded what was to come. She snuggled further into her pillow, fighting waking up for a few more minutes. She smiled when she felt strong arms wrap around her waist from behind.

"Morning Baby." Ashley said, followed with a sweet kiss to the back of the blonde's neck.

Ashley only received a grunt in response. The brunette scooted closer, her body completely engulfing the slumbering blonde's. Spencer's fingers thread through Ashley's as the grip around her stomach pleasantly tightened.

"Come on Beautiful, wake up. I miss those blueberry eyes."

Spencer snuggled further (if possible) into her brunette and huffed, "My eyes have never been, nor ever will be stupid round fruits that make a mess everywhere." Spencer had always been more of a strawberry girl.

Ashley only chuckled; Spencer's faux grumpiness could not damper this time of year. Plus Spencer was so cute all annoyed and harassed in the morning. Ashley couldn't help but bug her.

Spencer brought Ashley's hands up to her face and placed a soft kiss on the scars that marked her wrists. It never failed to make Ashley melt.

"Fine, we can sleep for a few more minutes."

"Chump." Spencer mumbled, already half asleep. The blonde smiled at Ashley's laugh.

* * *

Ashley was awake again. She heard the tiny pitter-patter of feet in the hallway, and the slow squeak of the door (she had yet to fix). Despite that, the brunette simply tightened her grip on her sleeping wife, but was distracted when she heard little Em heaving her younger brother onto the bed before crawling on herself. Giggles and "shh" 's could be heard, and Ashley had to fight off her smile/grimace when a small foot landed on her stomach and another kicked her face.

Four tiny hands started playing with her face when she heard her son and daughter say, "Mama, Santa's day yet?" "Mama, we know you are awake. Mommy says you don't know howta sleep right."

One eye peeked open when she saw her beautiful babies, bed-head in place, pj's askew, and small little grins on their faces.

Pulling herself away from Spencer, the brunette opened her arms in order to receive some of the greatest cuddles ever.

"No Nuggets, no Santa yet." Ashley glanced at the clock and held back a groan when she saw it was 6:30 in the morning, on a Saturday.

"Let's go make some reindeer pancakes for Mommy, okay?"

Chris buried his little blonde head into Ashley's neck, giggling at something (Ashley would never figure out what), while Emily nodded her head enthusiastically, her curls bouncing with her.

Ashley got out of bed, placing a gentle kiss on Spencer's forehead, and headed to the kitchen with her baby boy wrapped in her arms, and her darling girl directing her from her perch on Ashley's back.

* * *

The blonde tiredly stumbled her way into the kitchen hearing the high-pitched giggling of her three favorite people in the world. As she padded into the kitchen, she was hardly surprised to find the total mess covering all surfaces.

While Ashley tended to be clean, their daughter took after her mommy and made a mess everywhere, and Chris took any chance he could to destroy on sight (it was the boy/Glen in him). Three heads turned towards her, all covered in a nice mixture of flour, batter, and (for whatever reason) red frosting. Blue eyes caught the devilish look on all three faces as she slowly began to back out of the kitchen.

Resistance was futile; she was tackled into a loving mess on the floor and could only laugh when Teddy came and licked some wayward frosting off her face.

* * *

Three days away from Christmas Eve and a tired Spencer stumbled through the house in search of her family. She had had a long day, ending at the hospital after 6 hours of assisting a surgery for a young patient of hers that she promised would be home by Christmas. Everything went smoothly, and Spencer was so happy she was able to keep her promise.

As she walked down the hallway she heard Ashley's voice coming from Emily's room. The blonde stood outside of the doorway looking onto the scene. Chris was in Ashley's lap, fast asleep, while Ashley sat on Emily's bed with her, leaning against the headboard, her arm wrapped around the small girl's shoulders while Emily looked at her Mama with loving eyes.

The brunette was closing a small kid's book, finishing the story, "And because of Rudolph's red nose, he was able to save Christmas!"

They were silent for a moment, Emily fighting off sleep while Ashley's hand rubbed up and down the small girl's arm. Tiny fingers started tracing over the various scars on Ashley's arm.

"Mama, how did ya get so many ouches? Were you a baddie?"

Ashley looked down at her daughter, her eyes impossibly soft, and flicked her eyes to the doorway where she knew her wife was watching.

"Before I had you or Chris in my life, and before I met your Mommy, I didn't take good care of myself. I did a lot of dumb, silly things." Ashley finally settled on.

"But you are done being dumb, right?"

Ashley smiled as the small girl yawned, "Yea, Bug. No more dumb things for Mama." The brunette leaned down giving the girl a soft kiss before standing up with Chris in her arms and a quiet goodnight.

Ashley smiled when her eyes finally landed on her doctor, tears gathered in her eyes. Spencer placed a hand on her son's back while leaning in to give her beautiful, perfect, non-dumb wife a kiss.

Ashley pulled back and smiled, "I missed you Spence."

"I'll say goodnight to the little Bug and meet you in our room." Ashley gave a small nod, walking towards Chris' bedroom to put him down when she heard her wife's teasing voice.

"We can make up for lost time."

* * *

The blonde could feel her wife buzzing with excitement next to her in the bed, which was concerning considering it couldn't be later than 5:30 in the morning on Christmas Eve.

"Spence, Spen-cerrrr. You have to wake up. It's a Christmas miracle," the brunette whispered, her lips softly brushing against Spencer's neck while she snuggled into the doctor.

"I don't require miracles to wake up, I only need one thing" the blonde responded. Spencer's eyes were still closed with a smile on her face as her arms wrapped around her wife, pulling her impossibly closer.

Ashley asked with a grin, "Oh yea? What do you require Mrs. Carlin?"

Spencer brought her hands up to her own face, lightly tapping her lips for a kiss. Ashley rolled her eyes and laughed, indulging her wife's request.

"Mmm," Spencer's eyes met Ashley's, "Morning." Upon seeing those blue eyes, softened with sleep and love, Ashley lost her initial purpose of waking her wife up and went in for another kiss.

Spencer was quick to respond, her hands traveling Ashley's body as the kisses got progressively more heated. Spencer was about to slip the brunette's shirt off when Ashley pulled back suddenly.

"Spencer! That was definitely not the Christmas miracle I was referring to!"

Spencer let out a soft groan, "Miracles are overrated. Now get back here!" Her plead was followed by trying to pull the brunette back down to her.

Ashley sat up suddenly, "Nope! You will have to get me!" The brunette jumped out of bed, shivering as the cold air hit her as she ran towards the window.

Spencer was out of bed in a flash (only stumbling once) to reach her wife, who had stopped trying to run away.

Ashley pulled the blonde close, giving her a soft, but pleasurable morning kiss. "Baby, look, you are missing the best thing." Ashley mumbled, her nose softly brushing against Spencer's cheek.

Spencer, slightly annoyed with the interruption (again!) glanced out the window Ashley had gestured towards. The blonde let out a small gasp and spun towards Ashley in surprise, "Ash! It's snowing! I know it has been a weirdly cold December, but it never snows here!"

The brunette smiled, turning her wife to watch the snowflakes fall to the ground, arms wrapped around the doctor's waist slowly swaying their bodies with the drifting flakes.

Spencer's sleeping and stunned brain caught up with her as she registered the lack of snow at the corner of their block, their street being the only one covered in the soft powder.

"Ash?"

"Yea, Baby?"

"Why is it only snowing on our street?"

"Um. You've been really good this year?"

Spencer laughed out loud at the response and turned in her wife's arms to see that mischievous smile only Ashley and her daughter could pull off.

"What did you do?"

"You mentioned awhile ago how you missed the white Christmases you had when you were younger and you all went to Ohio for the holidays. I thought you, and the peanuts deserved a white Christmas."

Spencer couldn't help but kiss her wife at that. It was true, growing up, the Carlin's had always spent Christmas in Ohio where both her parents families resided. After colleges started, lives changed, and Paula got sick, Christmases changed from white winter wonderlands, to just as loving, southern Californian happenings.

"How did you even do this?"

"I may have rented an obscene amount of movie snow generators. Just be glad the weather has been so weirdly cold so the snow sticks around for a little."

Spencer could only laugh at her wife. Half of her was shocked, but the other half is surprised Ashley hadn't done something like this sooner.

The brunette smiled at her wife, finally getting too excited to remain in their room, "Let's wake up the kids and play in it before the rest of the town comes."

"The rest of the town?"

"Yea Spencer, you aren't the only one that can pull town-wide surprises by way of the town meetings. In exchange for permission and permits required, I invited the whole town for a block party of sorts."

Spencer laughed. This place has always been so strange and small and close-knit, and it was a relief to know her wife openly embraced the crazy.

* * *

The family (including all aunts, uncles, grandparents, children, and CIA agents) had all gathered in the snow. Ashley watched on, smile on her face at seeing the whole town frolic in the powdery fluff. Her children and wife might have been the cutest things on the planet upon exiting the house. Squeals of laughter followed face-plants in the snow. Even teddy was hopping around like a puppy again.

Waking the kids up at 5:30 in the morning had been an enjoyable experience. Tiny little hands rubbing tired eyes as each kid clung to a mother. Emily had been grumbling until her tiny little blue eyes looked out and saw the snow falling to the ground. Ashley couldn't help but laugh when her daughter's eyes widened in shock.

Chris was a quiet and easy child, much like the brunette, so he silently whispered, "Mommy," in awe, snuggling closer to Spencer at seeing the snow covered street. His young mind not really wrapping around why he was awake this early, and what a strange sight snow in southern California was.

It didn't take long to wrap the kids up and head out the front door. Hours later, the kids are still completely in awe of the snow, as is the rest of the town. Ashley smiles to herself, pleased that she could bring some Christmas cheer to the only place she had thought of as home.

Arms wrapped around Ashley's waist from behind as Spencer placed a soft kiss on the brunette's neck. Ashley felt the doctor let out a little laugh, "man, your kid is so weird."

Ashley looked up and spotted little Emily seemingly chasing her own tail. Falling down from getting dizzy, only to get back up and resume running around in a tiny circle. Teddy watched the young girl like she was out of her mind.

"You think she's weird? You should meet my wife." Ashley replied, a small smirk gracing her face.

"You're the idiot that married her," Spencer smiled as she tightened her grip on her girl. Leaning closer to the brunette's ear, she whispered, "Forget you wife, let's run away together."

Ashley could hear the smile, "Naw, I'm pretty fond of my little weirdos."

Ashley tipped her head back and gave the beaming blonde a light peck on the lips. Before it could become anything more the girls were smacked with something cold and wet. Well, mostly Ashley was, she turned Spencer in order to protect her from the coming snowball, but time and relatively low stress lifestyle had slowed the ex-spy down and the blonde got a little shock from the snow as well.

The couple looked up to see Emily, Glen, and Chelsea all looking innocently their way, each point a finger of blame at the others.

Spencer and Ashley simply gave each other a devilish smirks before grabbing some snow and declaring war in the front yard.

* * *

Getting the kids (and Aunt Madison) in from the snow for the night was fairly difficult. But because of the early (very early) start, and the promise of Santa the next morning, the kids finally settled down.

From the moment dinner ended to being tucked into bed, Emily and Chris, who could not help but assist his partner in crime, had been chanting "Santa day! Santa day!" in anticipation of Christmas in the morning. Even while placing kisses to foreheads as sleepy eyes drifted shut, quiet mummerings of "Santa day," drifted out of the small mouths.

Ashley and Spencer sat in the bedroom, wrapping the last of the presents for the tree. It had been a wonderful day, and Ashley was happy that the snow would last a few more days due to the cold weather conditions outside.

Before Ashley could finish her musings she felt a small ball of blonde energy tackle her down on the mattress. Spencer's mouth instantly found Ashley's pulling the girl into a searing kiss.

The blonde pulled back slightly, "Thank you so much for today Ashley. For everyday. From the moment I met you, you have made every single dream I've ever had, and even ones I didn't know I had come true. I could not love you more than I do right in this moment, but I am sure as time goes on, my love will grow impossibly larger and deeper."

Ashley smiled up at her wife, her hand reaching up to brush some hair out of the doctor's face. "If anyone in the world deserves all their dreams to come true, its you Spence."

The blonde smiled, and leaned in for another kiss, finally getting the opportunity to finish what the started very early this morning.

* * *

Ashley groaned when she heard the soft tapping waking her up. After her very early morning yesterday, and her and Spencer's after bed-time activities Ashley felt deliciously sore and tired, and wished for only a few more hours before having to deal with the nuggets and morning.

Before Ashley could groan again, she heard the tapping, a little louder, coming from their window. An eye pooped open and noticed the distinct lack of her blonde clinging to her like a koala. Ashley got up and walked toward the window, realizing it was still pitch black outside, the clock read 3:07 AM.

When the brunette looked out the window she saw Spencer standing on the lawn bundled up standing in the snow. Ashley smiled a little confused, and opened the window.

"Hi Spence," Ashley called down, trying to keep from yelling and waking up the neighbors (the kids could sleep through an Armageddon).

"Hi Ash."

The brunette rolled her eyes slightly looking at the sweet smile on her wife's face and the fact that she was not going to offer any explanation as to why she was throwing rocks at her own bedroom window.

"Care to explain?"

"Well, I realized in our entire, insane, relationship, no one has ever done the throw rocks at your window thing, and I obviously couldn't let the opportunity pass."

"I think that is usually intended when the couple doesn't live together."

"Irrelevant," Spencer replied, waving her hand in the air as if to wave the sentence away.

"Get down here now!" The blonde demanded.

"Why? We already played in the snow," Ashley complained slightly.

Spencer laughed at her tired wife's obvious confusion. The doctor gestured behind her, "You aren't the only one that can pull a romantic gesture."

Ashley's eyes widened at the fairly large ice rink Spencer pointed towards in the middle of the street. It was made out of a large temporary pool.

It took seven and a half minutes before a dressed Ashley met Spencer outside, who was already lacing up her ice skates. The brunette quietly sat next to her wife, taking the proffered skates and putting them on with a smile on her face.

As they quietly made their way onto the ice, Ashley then realized music was playing softly for the two of them. Ashley reached towards her wife, lacing their hands together.

They skated around slowly, allowing Spencer to get her balance, before either of them said anything. The blonde slowly turned towards her wife, a sparkle in her eye when she whispered, "Dance with me."

The brunette wrapped Spencer in her arms and they slowly moved to the music together, stars twinkling above them and the rest of the world forgotten.

"How did you do all this Spencer?"

The blonde gave a small smile, "Madison used some CIA connections to get a chemical that can freeze water for an extended amount of time before she arrived this morning."

The brunette smiled giving her girl a soft kiss in thanks and awe. She pulled away slightly, allowing her nose to nuzzle into Spencer's.

Spencer tightened her grip on her wife, and finally whispered, "You aren't the only one that wants to make all her wife's wishes come true."

Ashley pulled away slightly, looking into the blue eyes she had fallen in love with so many years ago. She thought of their journey together; she thought of their life and the two beautiful, precious gifts safely sleeping in their beds. She thought of all the memories they had and all the memories to come, and that she was lucky enough to share them with the love of her life, the love of all her lives.

"You made them all come true the moment you said 'I love you too.'"

Spencer, slightly teary eyed, pulled her wife towards her for another kiss, soft, slow and sweet.

"Merry Christmas Ash."

"Merry Christmas Spence."

* * *

**Again! Thank you for your continued comments and support! I have been trying to get into writing again, and was curious if this fandom was still around, and even more curious if anyone who liked this story would be willing to read a faberry one I have been working on (mind you it is really different from this).**

**Thanks again! And happy reading!**


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